Should I build a house next door to the inlaws?

[ardokano]

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Its must be rich guys for try it..

When i calculate with friend how much its cost normal house. Its be up price if buy new in near Pattaya or Bangkok in "village" from some developer.

[MJCM]

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Its must be rich guys for try it..

When i calculate with friend how much its cost normal house. Its be up price if buy new in near Pattaya or Bangkok in "village" from some developer.

Rich guys ?

Stay with the inlaws for a couple of weeks and see if you like it.

Or rent a house in the neighbourhood or is that also only available to "rich" guys ?

Edited May 3, 2016 by MJCM

[ardokano]

If you can't speak Thai when they come over and they will come over all the time, specially when it's hot to be near the A/C. You will find you will have to go into another room or outside in the garden because it will drive you craze along with the loud nightly TV programmes which they all love.

You will not see must of you wife without the tribe being with her and it will get to her as well.

I tried it for 4 years in the end I said are you coming or staying up to you.

Best thing I ever did it was painful but worth it in the long run for both of us.

Good luck mate.

Go another room?

You seriose? Why just not say please shut up- let me thinks or I watch TV. Its YOUR HOME!!

[rgs2001uk]

The bottom line here is, whose dream are you financing, yours or your girls?

If she wants to live upcountry, let her finance it.

The honest truth is, I dont know of many farangs who woke up one morning and thought, I want to live in the ass end of nowhere.

Not mentioned, bloody roasting in the summer, freezing in the winter.

Water shortages, brown outs.

The bloody dust.

Charcoal farms next door.

No internet, no farang television.

Boredom, boredom, boredom.

Nothing to do, it will do your head in.

I remember going upcountry to visit a friend, the highlight of his week, drinking lao kao with the locals (that he paid for) to watch Thai boxing on a Sunday afternoon on a black and white telly outside some mom n pop shop.

Ooh very short sighted comments.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none, but we also have a 40m well which provides (if needed) good water (and yes I had it tested at a BKK lab).

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out (lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Drinking Lao Khao not my thing, but the neighbours come by once a while and bring their own beers and also Lao Khao (for those who like it) and we have a great time. The whole evening only costs us doing some washing up (the glasses they drink out) and maybe some snacks.

The only thing I have to agree with is the dust.

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Farang style, your average Somchai upcountry doesnt have.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none,

Consider yourself lucky, try other areas.

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

No offence, do you actually live in the boonies?

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I wish it were true, heck even here in Bkk I am unable to watch live football if I dont subscribe to some company.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out

No offence, everything I like doing involves leaving the house, playing golf, playing snooker, gettin on my Mountain bike and goig for a 30 Km ride.

(lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Concur, great place to visit, meet friends, play golf, eat farang food, drink farang beer and listen to live music, live there full time, NO chance.

Not mentioned, The Muchies, wait until the farang food craving kicks in, something simple like a Cheese and Branston pickle sannie, Fish Chips & Mushy peas.

Yes I can eat Thai food, but I dont want to eat it every day, and I sure as heck cant eat what passes for food upcountry.

Pla Ra, no thanx.

Lap nu/ngu, no thanx.

I get down to my budda every day and give thanx to The Mall Korat, what relief after eating sticky rice and grass every day, everything else I couldnt stomach.

Not mentioned, the usual bureaucracy, Embassay Letter, etc etc, opening a bank account, sollee sir can not do.

Best advice for the OP, go live there in some rented place for at least a year before even considering moving full time.

[ardokano]

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Its must be rich guys for try it..

When i calculate with friend how much its cost normal house. Its be up price if buy new in near Pattaya or Bangkok in "village" from some developer.

Rich guys ?

Stay with the inlaws for a couple of weeks and see if you like it.

Or rent a house in the neighbourhood or is that also only available to "rich" guys ?

Topic about build house!!! Not about rent thaistyle house.

[williamgeorgeallen]

If you can't speak Thai when they come over and they will come over all the time, specially when it's hot to be near the A/C. You will find you will have to go into another room or outside in the garden because it will drive you craze along with the loud nightly TV programmes which they all love.

You will not see must of you wife without the tribe being with her and it will get to her as well.

I tried it for 4 years in the end I said are you coming or staying up to you.

Best thing I ever did it was painful but worth it in the long run for both of us.

Good luck mate.

Go another room?

You seriose? Why just not say please shut up- let me thinks or I watch TV. Its YOUR HOME!!

ah, but it is on her land in their country. dont matter who paid to build the house, he dont own it any more.

[rgs2001uk]

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Its must be rich guys for try it..

When i calculate with friend how much its cost normal house. Its be up price if buy new in near Pattaya or Bangkok in "village" from some developer.

Rich guys ?

Stay with the inlaws for a couple of weeks and see if you like it.

Or rent a house in the neighbourhood or is that also only available to "rich" guys ?

Topic about build house!!! Not about rent thaistyle house.

Have to build house farang style or girl and family lose face.

Him falang him cheep chalee why him not build falang macmansion?

Him can build house, all family can live na ka.

Him falang him khon ruay, him can pay everything na ka.

Upcountry is littered with these mansions that stand as nothing more than a Farangs Folly.

If upcountry is so great, why didnt you meet your mrs there?

Answers, its the pits, she had to move elsewhere.

[ardokano]

If you can't speak Thai when they come over and they will come over all the time, specially when it's hot to be near the A/C. You will find you will have to go into another room or outside in the garden because it will drive you craze along with the loud nightly TV programmes which they all love.

You will not see must of you wife without the tribe being with her and it will get to her as well.

I tried it for 4 years in the end I said are you coming or staying up to you.

Best thing I ever did it was painful but worth it in the long run for both of us.

Good luck mate.

Go another room?

You seriose? Why just not say please shut up- let me thinks or I watch TV. Its YOUR HOME!!

ah, but it is on her land in their country. dont matter who paid to build the house, he dont own it any more.

So What?

You mean she and she family not have any respect?

I do not understand why need be with she??

[MJCM]

The bottom line here is, whose dream are you financing, yours or your girls?

If she wants to live upcountry, let her finance it.

The honest truth is, I dont know of many farangs who woke up one morning and thought, I want to live in the ass end of nowhere.

Not mentioned, bloody roasting in the summer, freezing in the winter.

Water shortages, brown outs.

The bloody dust.

Charcoal farms next door.

No internet, no farang television.

Boredom, boredom, boredom.

Nothing to do, it will do your head in.

I remember going upcountry to visit a friend, the highlight of his week, drinking lao kao with the locals (that he paid for) to watch Thai boxing on a Sunday afternoon on a black and white telly outside some mom n pop shop.

Ooh very short sighted comments.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none, but we also have a 40m well which provides (if needed) good water (and yes I had it tested at a BKK lab).

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out (lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Drinking Lao Khao not my thing, but the neighbours come by once a while and bring their own beers and also Lao Khao (for those who like it) and we have a great time. The whole evening only costs us doing some washing up (the glasses they drink out) and maybe some snacks.

The only thing I have to agree with is the dust.

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Farang style, your average Somchai upcountry doesnt have.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none,

Consider yourself lucky, try other areas.

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

No offence, do you actually live in the boonies?

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I wish it were true, heck even here in Bkk I am unable to watch live football if I dont subscribe to some company.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out

No offence, everything I like doing involves leaving the house, playing golf, playing snooker, gettin on my Mountain bike and goig for a 30 Km ride.

(lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Concur, great place to visit, meet friends, play golf, eat farang food, drink farang beer and listen to live music, live there full time, NO chance.

<snip>

Best advice for the OP, go live there in some rented place for at least a year before even considering moving full time.

Yes I live in the Boonies 18 km away from the nearest city.

For interney just look up TOT Winet, which is internet based on wireless technology, I have a 17m high TOT tower in my garden which picks up a signal from a tower 9 kms away and is more then adequate to watch ThaiExpatTV (unfortunately not for IlikeHD) for TV i also have Truevision sat tv.

Immigration is a 120km one way trip away and because it's not the friendliest immigration, I have stopped getting extensions of stay and now on a ME non-O and have to leave the country every 90 days. But no problem whatsoever.

Food wise we manage, we get fresh pork, chicken from food trucks that drive through the village 2-3 times a week. And fresh produce is also no problem as someone from the village is going to the nearest "city" almost every day and we have a car to go shopping (Big C / Makro is around 45kms away)

I personally love living in the village, lived in Pattaya for a long time (5+ years) but wouldn't want to live there anymore or in any other Big city. Food wise. believe it or not, there is a guy who can get a lot of the Foreign food (if you desire it) and delivers it to your house (or you can pick it up).

Edit: My only main issue with living here is Health care, as the hospitals here are ... (No comment), for good care I need to drive to either Khon Kaen or Korat (around 150kms+ away

Edited May 3, 2016 by MJCM

[D3030]

If you have a choice, then no!!

Or, depends what the in-laws house looks like and how many people live in it..

You may pay to build the house next to the in-laws, and who knows?

Her parents may just decide your house is their house, and you end up paying for another one to be built for just you and your wife..

Edited May 3, 2016 by D3030

[rgs2001uk]

The bottom line here is, whose dream are you financing, yours or your girls?

If she wants to live upcountry, let her finance it.

The honest truth is, I dont know of many farangs who woke up one morning and thought, I want to live in the ass end of nowhere.

Not mentioned, bloody roasting in the summer, freezing in the winter.

Water shortages, brown outs.

The bloody dust.

Charcoal farms next door.

No internet, no farang television.

Boredom, boredom, boredom.

Nothing to do, it will do your head in.

I remember going upcountry to visit a friend, the highlight of his week, drinking lao kao with the locals (that he paid for) to watch Thai boxing on a Sunday afternoon on a black and white telly outside some mom n pop shop.

Ooh very short sighted comments.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none, but we also have a 40m well which provides (if needed) good water (and yes I had it tested at a BKK lab).

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out (lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Drinking Lao Khao not my thing, but the neighbours come by once a while and bring their own beers and also Lao Khao (for those who like it) and we have a great time. The whole evening only costs us doing some washing up (the glasses they drink out) and maybe some snacks.

The only thing I have to agree with is the dust.

But it's not for everyone, just try it and if you don't like it MOVE.

Brownouts Yes, but can be easily solved with a genset / ups.

Farang style, your average Somchai upcountry doesnt have.

Water shortages, in the area were we live fortunately none,

Consider yourself lucky, try other areas.

Internet available (lookup TotWiNet)

No offence, do you actually live in the boonies?

Farang Tv, when you have internet you can watch all the Farang Tv you want.

I wish it were true, heck even here in Bkk I am unable to watch live football if I dont subscribe to some company.

I have enough things to do to keep me busy, and no need to go out

No offence, everything I like doing involves leaving the house, playing golf, playing snooker, gettin on my Mountain bike and goig for a 30 Km ride.

(lived 5+ years in Pattaya and don't wanna go back)

Concur, great place to visit, meet friends, play golf, eat farang food, drink farang beer and listen to live music, live there full time, NO chance.

<snip>

Best advice for the OP, go live there in some rented place for at least a year before even considering moving full time.

Yes I live in the Boonies 18 km away from the nearest city.

For interney just look up TOT Winet, which is internet based on wireless technology, I have a 17m high TOT tower in my garden which picks up a signal from a tower 9 kms away and is more then adequate to watch ThaiExpatTV (unfortunately not for IlikeHD) for TV i also have Truevision sat tv.

Immigration is a 120km one way trip away and because it's not the friendliest immigration, I have stopped getting extensions of stay and now on a ME non-O and have to leave the country every 90 days. But no problem whatsoever.

Food wise we manage, we get fresh pork, chicken from food trucks that drive through the village 2-3 times a week. And fresh produce is also no problem as someone from the village is going to the nearest "city" almost every day and we have a car to go shopping (Big C / Makro is around 45kms away)

I personally love living in the village, lived in Pattaya for a long time (5+ years) but wouldn't want to live there anymore or in any other Big city. Food wise. believe it or not, there is a guy who can get a lot of the Foreign food (if you desire it) and delivers it to your house (or you can pick it up).

Edit: My only main issue with living here is Health care, as the hospitals here are ... (No comment), for good care I need to drive to either Khon Kaen or Korat (around 150kms+ away

Thank you for highlighting exactly why I will NEVER move upcountry.

90 Day reports, screw that, head to Singapore etc, come back and reset, next time head to Singapore again.

Why leave the country, if you are married just park 400k in the bank, ploblem solved.

Food wise we manage, we get fresh pork, chicken from food trucks that drive through the village 2-3 times a week.

Good lord man, rather you than I, do these trucks sell Colemans mustard, Branston pickle, etc etc.

I

[MJCM]

^ everyone's free choice

Every 90 days we leave the country (regional airport is only 50 mins drive away) for a mini (nah sometimes longer) holiday, we just came back (escape Song Kran) from 2 weeks Singapore and in July we are going for a 4-5 day trip to HKG.

I was on an extension of stay (based on marriage) but as said not anymore, now on ME NON-O

We have a great garden, with fish pounds (fish is not for sale, just a hobby) and it gives us enough things to do. Live is relaxed here (for us that is).

The food you mention, is readily available (tomorrow will send you a link via PM what is available here) for home delivery at a small premium.

Edited May 3, 2016 by MJCM

[ozyjon]

Go ahead, let us know the results.

[dotpoom]

As far away as possible

I was told on arriving here first that if I choose to build a house near a lady's relatives.... not to forget the rolls of barbed wire. I really had no idea what he was talking about so he explained what he meant. They were to put around the house to keep the (unannounced) relatives out.

[sipi]

Hey Davo, aren't you glad you asked?

Apparently...

Your house will get trashed.

It is too hot.

It is too cold.

You won't be able to buy pickles or mushy peas.

Your front door will get burnt down.

The inlaws will eat all your food.

There is no water.

You will get diseases.

You will need to learn Isaan.

There will be 4 barking dogs.

Your tv will be on full volume all night.

They will bleed you dry.

You will have to build another better house for the inlaws.

Motorbikes will keep you awake all night.

The smell of cooking will drive you mad.

Edited May 3, 2016 by sipi

[hawker9000]

Well there is 2 completely opposite answers.

'Would've been interesting to see (and you might've been somewhat better informed by seeing) this as a survey question ...

For myself, I think this is fertile ground for the "middle road" approach. You want to be close enough perhaps that your wife can make the journey in, say, an easy day's or half-day's travel, but not so close that you're living like the Waltons and your regular "attendance" is expected.

[geronimo]

I shall be doing the same thing in a few years time. My Thai family are great and I guess it depends on how yours measure up. Only you will know the answer to that one.

[chudless]

I'm 300 metres from my in laws and it works great. Never intended to, we bought a house off plan in the city but having postage stamp size land led us to pull out of the deal and build on a rai in the village. Best thing I ever done. Peace and quiet, nice people, great family, lovely big garden for the kids....never happier. It's your own choice, make your decision regardless of comments here.

[starky]

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

Thereby limiting the amount of time she has for you possibly causing issues in your own relationship,if you wish to play second fiddle to her family go for it.

Do let us know how it pans out though.

Stoney, never a truer word said.

A difference between those of us who live here full time and the 2 week blow ins from elsewhere.

Heard it all before, oh save money , no need for hotel , buy house in village.

Who the heck comes to Thailand to spend 4 weeks in the ass end of nowhere, Phuket, Pattaya, Koh Samui etc etc.

Trapped in a village, no thanks, go spend your time and money elsewhere.

Farangs have told me, what used to be something to look forward to, soon became something to be endured, and finally something to be avoided at all costs.

As your teerak heads North on the smoking bus from Mor Chit to Assendsville Nowhere, go pour a coldie at the swimming pool in Pattaya and be thankfull you didnt go with her.

Yeah mate but surprise surprise not all of us met our missus in Pattaya or some bar in bangers. My missus was born bred worked and spent her whole life in Udon where I met her. She loves her family who coincidentally are great people and feels she needs to be near them. I could have put the foot down and forced her to move somewhere else but she would have been miserable. I was very apprehensive but ended up building a house not far from her olds. 5 years later I'm doing just fine it's different for me being a city kid but I can always get away if I want to. I won't live her forever but it's great for now and I did something for my wife that she will forever be appreciative of. So win-win for me. I understand Isaan might not be for everyone but it always surprises me the amount of vehmenance and hatred that's poured on the place. Probably just too far for some who can't stand not to be walking distance from their favourite bar, go-go or umpteenth coldie eh? Cheers.

[williamgeorgeallen]

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

Thereby limiting the amount of time she has for you possibly causing issues in your own relationship,if you wish to play second fiddle to her family go for it.

Do let us know how it pans out though.

Stoney, never a truer word said.

A difference between those of us who live here full time and the 2 week blow ins from elsewhere.

Heard it all before, oh save money , no need for hotel , buy house in village.

Who the heck comes to Thailand to spend 4 weeks in the ass end of nowhere, Phuket, Pattaya, Koh Samui etc etc.

Trapped in a village, no thanks, go spend your time and money elsewhere.

Farangs have told me, what used to be something to look forward to, soon became something to be endured, and finally something to be avoided at all costs.

As your teerak heads North on the smoking bus from Mor Chit to Assendsville Nowhere, go pour a coldie at the swimming pool in Pattaya and be thankfull you didnt go with her.

Yeah mate but surprise surprise not all of us met our missus in Pattaya or some bar in bangers. My missus was born bred worked and spent her whole life in Udon where I met her. She loves her family who coincidentally are great people and feels she needs to be near them. I could have put the foot down and forced her to move somewhere else but she would have been miserable. I was very apprehensive but ended up building a house not far from her olds. 5 years later I'm doing just fine it's different for me being a city kid but I can always get away if I want to. I won't live her forever but it's great for now and I did something for my wife that she will forever be appreciative of. So win-win for me. I understand Isaan might not be for everyone but it always surprises me the amount of vehmenance and hatred that's poured on the place. Probably just too far for some who can't stand not to be walking distance from their favourite bar, go-go or umpteenth coldie eh? Cheers

like everything it comes down to personal preference. the majority of us come to thailand to enjoy the cheap lifestyle in costal tourist towns with some ferang amenities. if that is you then you will most probably not enjoy living in esan. i am doing 5 months (one school semister) at the moment in nang rong outside burri ram and will be happy to be moving back to pattaya when the school semister finishes. all around us are houses paid for by foreigners, almost without exception none of the guys that paid to build them actually live in them. think this should serve as a warning to all those about to blow millions of baht on a house they will probably not want to live in.

[WishWashMan]

As far away as possible

this plus another hour away and youll be fine.

[spidermike007]

This does not work out well the overwhelming majority of the time.

Thais do not have the same sense of privacy that Westerners do....both in terms of walking into the house whenever they please, helping themselves to anything of yours etc but also in terms of prying/interfering in personal matters.

And they will put considerable pressure on your wife to do things "their" way; this may also include pressure to give them financial assistance.

Should you have children, this will be a particular problem and you may find yourself voiceless in how they are raised.

Both you and your wife will be happier if you build further away, and relations with the inlaws will likely be much more harmonious that way.

I tend to agree with all of this. We presently have a home a few hundred meters from her parents. But, they are not allowed to stay in the house. My brother in law can stay there, when he visits from far away. Otherwise, they help to maintain the house, they do the landscape maintenance, keep an eye on the house, deal with repairs, etc. It works out well. But, her family are exceptionally good people, and do not have alot of the ugly qualities I see mentioned here often. And we do not live there. It is only someplace we visit occasionally, and someplace my wife chooses to stay for a week or two, while i am overseas doing some work.

If and when we ever decide to move up there, we will build a home on some rural property she owns, two kilometers from town, where we will have some privacy, and quiet, but be close to her family. It really depends on her family. Are they really good people, who have some respect for your privacy, and your boundaries? Do they have alot of respect for you as a man? Do they listen to you? Does your wife listen to you, when it comes to family boundaries?

All of that has to come into play. Otherwise, keep some distance.

[davo2212]

Hey Davo, aren't you glad you asked?

Apparently...

Your house will get trashed.

It is too hot.

It is too cold.

You won't be able to buy pickles or mushy peas.

Your front door will get burnt down.

The inlaws will eat all your food.

There is no water.

You will get diseases.

You will need to learn Isaan.

There will be 4 barking dogs.

Your tv will be on full volume all night.

They will bleed you dry.

You will have to build another better house for the inlaws.

Motorbikes will keep you awake all night.

The smell of cooking will drive you mad.

yes your right but somehow it still sounds better than going to work tomorrow.

[davo2212]

This does not work out well the overwhelming majority of the time.

Thais do not have the same sense of privacy that Westerners do....both in terms of walking into the house whenever they please, helping themselves to anything of yours etc but also in terms of prying/interfering in personal matters.

And they will put considerable pressure on your wife to do things "their" way; this may also include pressure to give them financial assistance.

Should you have children, this will be a particular problem and you may find yourself voiceless in how they are raised.

Both you and your wife will be happier if you build further away, and relations with the inlaws will likely be much more harmonious that way.

I tend to agree with all of this. We presently have a home a few hundred meters from her parents. But, they are not allowed to stay in the house. My brother in law can stay there, when he visits from far away. Otherwise, they help to maintain the house, they do the landscape maintenance, keep an eye on the house, deal with repairs, etc. It works out well. But, her family are exceptionally good people, and do not have alot of the ugly qualities I see mentioned here often. And we do not live there. It is only someplace we visit occasionally, and someplace my wife chooses to stay for a week or two, while i am overseas doing some work.

If and when we ever decide to move up there, we will build a home on some rural property she owns, two kilometers from town, where we will have some privacy, and quiet, but be close to her family. It really depends on her family. Are they really good people, who have some respect for your privacy, and your boundaries? Do they have alot of respect for you as a man? Do they listen to you? Does your wife listen to you, when it comes to family boundaries?

All of that has to come into play. Otherwise, keep some distance.

ok cheers

[ardokano]

Yeah mate but surprise surprise not all of us met our missus in Pattaya or some bar in bangers. My missus was born bred worked and spent her whole life in Udon where I met her. She loves her family who coincidentally are great people and feels she needs to be near them. I could have put the foot down and forced her to move somewhere else but she would have been miserable. I was very apprehensive but ended up building a house not far from her olds. 5 years later I'm doing just fine it's different for me being a city kid but I can always get away if I want to. I won't live her forever but it's great for now and I did something for my wife that she will forever be appreciative of. So win-win for me. I understand Isaan might not be for everyone but it always surprises me the amount of vehmenance and hatred that's poured on the place. Probably just too far for some who can't stand not to be walking distance from their favourite bar, go-go or umpteenth coldie eh? Cheers.

"she would have been miserable."

she would be unhappy with her husband?

" I understand Isaan might not be for everyone but it always surprises me the amount of vehmenance and hatred that's poured on the place"

Not All rich as You. Can make in Isaan clean and inhabitable place near normal western standart.

And pay for this is double o triple price..Compare with some home from developer in near "civilization"

[Kwasaki]

Don't really understand why someone would ask this, as a previous post said there are 2 answers which only you can decide.

My wife and I decided together what we would do, sounds like the ball has been put in your court already.

[ardokano]

This does not work out well the overwhelming majority of the time.

Thais do not have the same sense of privacy that Westerners do....both in terms of walking into the house whenever they please, helping themselves to anything of yours etc but also in terms of prying/interfering in personal matters.

And they will put considerable pressure on your wife to do things "their" way; this may also include pressure to give them financial assistance.

Should you have children, this will be a particular problem and you may find yourself voiceless in how they are raised.

Both you and your wife will be happier if you build further away, and relations with the inlaws will likely be much more harmonious that way.

We presently have a home a few hundred meters from her parents.

If and when we ever decide to move up there, we will build a home on some rural property she owns, two kilometers from town, where we will have some privacy, and quiet, but be close to her family.

1.You get Thai sitizen ? if NOT .. so She HAVE!!!! Even not your children.. becouse if Children decide not toget Thai citizens. they can not own land after the death of his mother.

I know a real situation when it happened and cousins like jackals with their parents.

2. You must be guy with deep pocket if for you so easy bild second house which you do not own, and which cost more than just bought in some Thai "civilization" place..

Edited May 4, 2016 by ardokano

[Ireland32]

I wouldn't do it, but if you must why not build a very cheap house there and buy house to retire in somewhere else, then you always have a house to live in when you and the Mrs want to go back.

buy one of those cheap bungalows , and can stay and leave anytime without big investment

[tonray]

I wouldn't do it, but if you must why not build a very cheap house there and buy house to retire in somewhere else, then you always have a house to live in when you and the Mrs want to go back.

buy one of those cheap bungalows , and can stay and leave anytime without big investment

It would be better not to build at all because going cheap means parents and daughter lose face in the eyes of the village and they will forever hate you for it. Think about it seriously before you go this route.

[hawker9000]

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

Thereby limiting the amount of time she has for you possibly causing issues in your own relationship,if you wish to play second fiddle to her family go for it.

Do let us know how it pans out though.

Stoney, never a truer word said.

A difference between those of us who live here full time and the 2 week blow ins from elsewhere.

Heard it all before, oh save money , no need for hotel , buy house in village.

Who the heck comes to Thailand to spend 4 weeks in the ass end of nowhere, Phuket, Pattaya, Koh Samui etc etc.

Trapped in a village, no thanks, go spend your time and money elsewhere.

Farangs have told me, what used to be something to look forward to, soon became something to be endured, and finally something to be avoided at all costs.

As your teerak heads North on the smoking bus from Mor Chit to Assendsville Nowhere, go pour a coldie at the swimming pool in Pattaya and be thankfull you didnt go with her.

Yeah mate but surprise surprise not all of us met our missus in Pattaya or some bar in bangers. My missus was born bred worked and spent her whole life in Udon where I met her. She loves her family who coincidentally are great people and feels she needs to be near them. I could have put the foot down and forced her to move somewhere else but she would have been miserable. I was very apprehensive but ended up building a house not far from her olds. 5 years later I'm doing just fine it's different for me being a city kid but I can always get away if I want to. I won't live her forever but it's great for now and I did something for my wife that she will forever be appreciative of. So win-win for me. I understand Isaan might not be for everyone but it always surprises me the amount of vehmenance and hatred that's poured on the place. Probably just too far for some who can't stand not to be walking distance from their favourite bar, go-go or umpteenth coldie eh? Cheers.

Surprise, surprise. I've never really heard anyone complain so much about Isaan, much less express any hatred towards it. Some might think it's kind of a rural and isolated existence compared to other parts of the world they find more enjoyable, but that doesn't necessarily mean they "hate" Isaan. Can't you simply prefer, say, the seaside, or something more urban, without "hating" Isaan? You have a very jaded, scornful, derisive, and self-centered view of what everyone other than yourself thinks and feels. You come to Thailand, presumably to experience a lifestyle different from wherever home used to be, and immediately set hard to work dismissing the differences with your fellow expats and what they make of the place and the best way to experience it. Gee, isn't that kind of why you left your home country in the first place?? Perhaps Isaan really has fogged over those social skills... Get out more. Meet people. Learn that different people do naturally like different things without necessarily being "haters" of everything that means a little something to you. Yeah mate, cheers!