For you men with Thai wives in Thailand....

[JAFO]

The other day she said.."Why are you walking like that".......

I said..."Walking like what"............

I got one similar, I was minding my own business yesterday and she walks up and says "Why are you sitting like that?" I said " Like what? Is there a new way to sit and I missed the memo?" She looked confused by the response and laughed.

But I have to say, today validated why she is my companion and friend along with being my wife.. I was ripping along in my truck heading out from the North. I missed the little BIB camera deal and as I crested a horizon there they were. 10 of them with over 20 cars off to the side. I was flagged over. Rolled down the window and asked "Whats up?". (I love talking slang English to them as it confuses them most of the time). They said I was going 125km. I said "No way I had cruise on set at 100 or so (I didn't btw but it sounded good). My wife got out, started questioning them. Wanted to see the picture because if they pictured me at 125km and I had cruise at 100 the speedometer could be off and she wants to take the truck to the dealer to have it checked being its nearly brand new and under warranty. They went back and forth a bit and soon I was in my truck and on our way, no fine-no ticket. We both laughed. Trust me they made plenty in the 10 minutes I was there.

[sirineou]

some of what we find as "telling us" how to do things could also be cultural miscommunication, or a way to express their love caring,.and wanting to help

I know when I watch my daughter doing something in a way I consider wrong , I find it difficult not to say something.

I know I should not say all the time, and to give her room to make her own mistakes or win her own victories .

But I have palpitations exercising constrain, those of you who are parents know what I mean.

Perhaps there is some of that going on also.

Personally I love it, I am comfortable enough with in my own skin not to care, and to find it funny, and some what adorable.And from the responses in this thread, I can tell most of you do too.

[mgjackson69]

One of the things I do, if it is not critical (of which most things are not, if we are honest with ourselves):

Rather than immediately jumping up with "they are doing it wrong", I will ask, "Why are they doing it that way?"

That opens the conversation...and my wife, bless her heart, is interested in knowing why I would think about a different way of doing something.

[billd766]

Yes and often I feel it necessary to remind her that I was doing this job (whatever it is) before she was born or that I studied this subject at college.

I might add that we do mostly laugh over it and it never gets really serious.

So you're old enough to be her father?

...... And your point is?

That he's old enough to be her father.

So what?

[mesterm]

Yes and often I feel it necessary to remind her that I was doing this job (whatever it is) before she was born or that I studied this subject at college.

I might add that we do mostly laugh over it and it never gets really serious.

So you're old enough to be her father?

So what?

Yeah, you too.

[eldragon]

I think Thailand has the second or third highest percentage of women in positions of authority (manager, director, etc.). It's over 50%. Might be over 60%. And while I remain single, I happen to notice Thai women talk way more than their men and like telling people what to do.

[Bangkokazy]

It eldragon say is true

[EmptyHead]

Yep - they love to give 110% & think that they are doing their upmost for you.....

They don't realize the value we inadvertently place on independence.....I get all the free space and time I want around the house - no problem.....And she (& daughters) handle/manage the house so well while all catering/contributing to all that I seldom notice or mind....It's much smoother & symbiotic than with western gals.....

But when away from the domain the "backseat driver" is in full force....Turns, parking spots, lanes are all in play.....

It's part & parcel to the umbrella of their/her commitment & they really are doing/trying their best for us - - in spite of how WE perceive it....

We/they are 180' from one another....That's what draws us (and repells us - within us).....

It's not love/hate thing as it is an appreciated difference thing that we don't completely understand.....And they don't really care if we "don't get it" - they're doing their best for US.. ....

And I semi-appreciate-understand-treasure-welcome it ------ I think.....

I'm happy, so I must......

I'm pretty happy with it too. But she is 20 years younger, so I have got to compensate somewhere.

Oooooh...I am so lovey dovey

[JAFO]

I think Thailand has the second or third highest percentage of women in positions of authority (manager, director, etc.). It's over 50%. Might be over 60%. And while I remain single, I happen to notice Thai women talk way more than their men and like telling people what to do.

That's an interesting observation but in reality those Directors, managers, supervisors are just name sakes. Confrontation or "Direct" communication is not part of Thai culture.

They are pushy by genetics not culture. Culture here depicts where they can press the envelope.

Now with every human being in any culture or any race there are followers and leaders. In same line their are passive and aggressive.

In the end chose wisely based on your needs and desires.

[bangkokfanatic]

The OP has seems to have come to terms with the realisation that ALL females will do this to some degree at least. Women like to talk (about everything) & men will rain silent. Such behaviour wouldn't be tolerated between males - it's friendship ruining stuff.

A good example of the differences in our brains is to watch 2 males move furniture -not much said and the movements are mostly intuitive - it's how our brains are wired.

Try the same with a man & a woman - man expects wife to "know how it should be done" & wife expects man "to talk about it before he just starts moving this way or that". Don't get me started on double kayaks - they are not called divorce boats for nothing!

There are usually two words that sorts this - "Yes dear!" - and then just do your own thing.

Unlike many above I have learnt that a happy wife gets me a happy life - and she's happiest when she THINKS I am paying attention to her emotional communication.

[Bredbury Blue]

My TW loves to receive compliments and I'm happy to give, but I don't remember the last time I received one (maybe never. Told her the other day that I'll be in a box before she gives me a compliment. How about your TW?

A Thai trait, my wife is never wrong, when facts/circumstances prove she was wrong she'll never admit it, never apologise, never say sorry. We laugh about it together.

[villagefarang]

My TW loves to receive compliments and I'm happy to give, but I don't remember the last time I received one (maybe never. Told her the other day that I'll be in a box before she gives me a compliment. How about your TW?

A Thai trait, my wife is never wrong, when facts/circumstances prove she was wrong she'll never admit it, never apologise, never say sorry. We laugh about it together.

Guess I am one of the lucky ones because I get lots of compliments from my wife, just not as many as I give her. Then again she deserves more than I do.

[JAFO]

Another one that makes laugh. My wife and I share the financial dealings, albeit we don't have many bills or expenses. So my wife will go withdraw some money and come home and give me X amount of baht and she kpeeps the rest for food or whatever. So we then proceed on about our day together and everywhere we go and get something I end up paying or she asks me do I have money to pay. In short time I am out of cash. I say to her " Hey can I get some cash from you" She says" What did you do with all the money I just gave you?" I start cracking up saying "I spent it on all the stuff we bought or what you asked me to buy". She says "Wow you spend a lot. I still have all the money I took out" then we both start laughing as I say funny how that works Huh?