Been Courting A Young Lady For 2 Weeks, She Knows I'm Old Fashioned...

[meemiathai]

maple,

slated is christian,and he is like many i met in america in the past that he is strict christian and they really do not have 'relations' before marriage; the same as most orthodox jews i know here in israel... they really do wait until marriage.... i just remembered as he had asked about christian associations in thailand a long group of posts ago...

and btw, my 19 yr old daughter has been dating an ethiopian traditional jewish guy for a year and they are both, yes, virgins.... as he is and she is still 'waiting for the right one' ... it does happen u know.

bina and anon

It's not about not having sex that I found suspect, it's taking up time on the ladies forum about it. I see that pumpuiman and fruitbatt alluded to this before. Reading between the lines for me sounds like this:

"Mom, I am such a good little boy! Look what a good little boy I am! So handsome and decent and pure! Do you see? Do you see what a good little boy I am?

"Oh, mother dear, protect me from those brutish, rude men for I am not like them! I am a delicate sensitive flower that must not be plucked before it's time.

"Oh, what a good little boy I am!"

I am not being entirely kind in making my point, but this is what I hear. This forum is supposed to be for women supporting women, right? Or stuff that comes up for women that they want other ladies' support or thoughts about.

This thread strikes me as a guy taking up women's attention and indirectly seeking approval. It reminds me of a dynamic in the US where people of color often say that they'd rather deal with the overt racism of the South than the smile-in-your-face-but-stab-you-in-the-back, hidden and sometimes subtle racism of the North. Maybe I'd rather have the blatant sexism with no pretense than the guy who thinks he's being good but sucking up just as much of women's energy. Go start a forum for sensitive guys supporting sensitive guys (or whatever you want to call it) instead.

Whilst this is a bit harsh on Mr now-well-and-truly-slated, i share some

resonance with what you perceive, Mapletree. In particular, i have reservations about such postings on a women's forum because of the inherent assumption that women are innately more sympathetic than men.

I think it is the dissonance between the avatar and the verbal message that bothered me in this thread.

The avatar, whether it be Mr Slated or Mr Universe, invites a female focus on a (supposed) conventionally attractive male body. Predictably appreciative responses from several women posters surely provided instant ego-gratification to Mr. Slated. Whilst i have heard of "muscular Christians", if Mr Slated is as narcissistic as his avatar suggests, then his claim to be a "good boy" seems improbable IM experience and opinion. Or perhaps he is just utterly confused and gives off distressingly mixed messages to his potential partners.

Good posts from MT and FB.

Exactly what I thought from the very begining.

[lannarebirth]

maple,

slated is christian,and he is like many i met in america in the past that he is strict christian and they really do not have 'relations' before marriage; the same as most orthodox jews i know here in israel... they really do wait until marriage.... i just remembered as he had asked about christian associations in thailand a long group of posts ago...

and btw, my 19 yr old daughter has been dating an ethiopian traditional jewish guy for a year and they are both, yes, virgins.... as he is and she is still 'waiting for the right one' ... it does happen u know.

bina and anon

It's not about not having sex that I found suspect, it's taking up time on the ladies forum about it. I see that pumpuiman and fruitbatt alluded to this before. Reading between the lines for me sounds like this:

"Mom, I am such a good little boy! Look what a good little boy I am! So handsome and decent and pure! Do you see? Do you see what a good little boy I am?

"Oh, mother dear, protect me from those brutish, rude men for I am not like them! I am a delicate sensitive flower that must not be plucked before it's time.

"Oh, what a good little boy I am!"

I am not being entirely kind in making my point, but this is what I hear. This forum is supposed to be for women supporting women, right? Or stuff that comes up for women that they want other ladies' support or thoughts about.

This thread strikes me as a guy taking up women's attention and indirectly seeking approval. It reminds me of a dynamic in the US where people of color often say that they'd rather deal with the overt racism of the South than the smile-in-your-face-but-stab-you-in-the-back, hidden and sometimes subtle racism of the North. Maybe I'd rather have the blatant sexism with no pretense than the guy who thinks he's being good but sucking up just as much of women's energy. Go start a forum for sensitive guys supporting sensitive guys (or whatever you want to call it) instead.

I think a lawyer would call that "assuming facts not in evidence". Women's Studies major?

[MiG16]

i think boo has a good point...that as long as its not insulting and abusive of women it seems mostly ok.

on the other hand...it doesnt seem the OP is looking for more attention that getting the original question answered..which he got a lot of our opinions in the beginning. i read some of the latter posts, and it seems we are now so lost in debating whether the post was/is justified to be here..when in fact we are the ones making a bigger issue of it. the post probably has lost its relavance in answering the OP already. Im surprised its still active!

on the issue of whether such posts should be allowed I remember SBK started that question in a separate thread..and if i recall correctly most didnt seem to have any huge objection. the way i see it is....the more we give attention to things the bigger it becomes. so if in your opinion something is what you consider a 'troll' (I never heard that word before reading thaivisa ) then very simply skip it and move on to the next item of interest to you theres plenty happening on thaivisa to keep each one of us occupied Im sure

ok enough of my ranting have a nice day....

[shaunmiller]

Might think your gay mate!!!

Seriously if you want to take things slow, why share a bed with her???

well gay or old fashioned, i,ve heard it all.....come tell us she knocked you back...hahaha

[Donz]

Im sure she thinks your gay, If a girl invited me back to her place to sleep with her in her bed but not do anything, I would think she was gay too.

Even if she was my friend, if she didnt even try and make a move then naturally she would be a gay

[leftcross]

the OP bloke sounds like a closet homosexual.

[farangsay]

the OP bloke sounds like a closet homosexual.

They only have closets in America right ?

Where I come from we have cupboards and wardrobes

so we're OK.

I shall remember never to open a "closet" should I

ever find myself in the USofA just in case there's

some in there.

Back on topic , this thread is too long to read at

this time of the evenin , did the poor girl ever

get her rocks off ?

Read a book , "The Far Pavilions".

Page 3 , hero meets heroine and they fall in love.

Page 767 they get it on.

You've got to admire that kind of patience.

[mapletree]

It's not about not having sex that I found suspect, it's taking up time on the ladies forum about it. I see that pumpuiman and fruitbatt alluded to this before. Reading between the lines for me sounds like this:

"Mom, I am such a good little boy! Look what a good little boy I am! So handsome and decent and pure! Do you see? Do you see what a good little boy I am?

"Oh, mother dear, protect me from those brutish, rude men for I am not like them! I am a delicate sensitive flower that must not be plucked before it's time.

"Oh, what a good little boy I am!"

I am not being entirely kind in making my point, but this is what I hear. This forum is supposed to be for women supporting women, right? Or stuff that comes up for women that they want other ladies' support or thoughts about.

This thread strikes me as a guy taking up women's attention and indirectly seeking approval. It reminds me of a dynamic in the US where people of color often say that they'd rather deal with the overt racism of the South than the smile-in-your-face-but-stab-you-in-the-back, hidden and sometimes subtle racism of the North. Maybe I'd rather have the blatant sexism with no pretense than the guy who thinks he's being good but sucking up just as much of women's energy. Go start a forum for sensitive guys supporting sensitive guys (or whatever you want to call it) instead.

I think a lawyer would call that "assuming facts not in evidence". Women's Studies major?

No.

Just a woman living in a world after about 7000 years of mostly male ascendency.

I'm a trained mediator and have had extensive practice listening for what people are not saying directly so I can help them work through conflicts with other parties. That doesn't mean I got it right in this case--I'd have to check it out, and generally I wouldn't be so blunt in working a case as I was here.

[meemiathai]

How can I make my wife love herself more than me? It's worrying that she loves me so much that she is going crazy. What can I do? Anything can be done to make her love me less yet still loves me?