Now give the "real" reason for staying ?

[xylophone]

I was a driven man and worked like the proverbial "bastard" most of my life, and mostly in stressful jobs (try managing $2 billion worth of other people's money!).

 

Always wanted success and worked hard to achieve it until the stress caused me to get sick.

 

My doctor said I had to change my life/lifestyle/work to something less stressful, but then again not easy when you've lived the lifestyle I had and were a driven man, and any new job I got, I would be in the same position, so I decided to sell everything and move to Thailand. The main reasons being: –

 

• I could retire here and never have to work again because my funds will outlast me by a long shot; even with a good lifestyle here.
• I would be stress free because I wouldn't have to work.
• I would have zero debt.
• Hopefully my health would improve, and that has proven to be the case.
• It is warm all the year round and I can put up with that.
• There is good healthcare here should I need it.
• There are also good restaurants and I frequent them quite often.
• I have made some good friends here.
• I have unofficially adopted the daughter of my last girlfriend and enjoy her company immensely and have pledged to pay her way through high school and university, and she appreciates this, as does her mother.
• I can travel back to NZ anytime I want and I have done on many occasions.
• I am free to come and go as I want, within reason.
• I like the nightlife from time to time and it stops me getting totally bored.
• Massages, pedicures, manicures etc I indulge in and like.
• And if I require female company it is available on all sorts of levels.

There are a lot of things which I don't like about the place, however above are the reasons I stay and although I occasionally dream about going back to stay in Nelson (in the South Island of New Zealand) I pretty well know that if I went back I really would be living the life of the pensioner that I am and in my view Western society really doesn't want to know old farts like me and I would just fade away. Here I feel vibrant, alive, respected and cared about.

 

 

[Wake Up]

1 hour ago, natway09 said:

Jane, Great Post.

Don't you just love these guys that have to tell us all the time that their partner/ wife 

was never a bar girl. Next ,, they will be saying that she was a virgin at 36?   Ha Ha

After 30 years of marriage  I will never marry again but if I did it would be to a bar girl and I would never ever marry a virgin. Want great sex then have it with people that know what great sex actually is and how to talk about desires and positions and what they like and don't like. Some Bar girls are the best sex on the planet and in my opinion more honest and know themselves and others than their critics. 

 

[bazza73]

2 hours ago, elgordo38 said:

Me to plus the toe nail clipping, shaving, haircuts personal attention in the shower and the great smile. Its the stuff you can only dream about in the west. Heck I can even save a few sheckles a month. She smiles when I put the excess in her bank account. 

"Personal attention in the shower?" Please do elaborate, I need a bit of titillation today.

[whoareyou]

After 30 years of marriage  I will never marry again but if I did it would be to a bar girl and I would never ever marry a virgin. Want great sex then have it with people that know what great sex actually is and how to talk about desires and positions and what they like and don't like. Some Bar girls are the best sex on the planet and in my opinion more honest and know themselves and others than their critics. 
 

Why not continue to rent? Better than marrying a total slut.

You forgot to mention that apart from good sex your going to have fights as well.. Eventually you will end up calling her a crazy whore!

And then you will get the 30 second death stare..

Why would you want that drama lol

[bazza73]

Let's see:

 

Thailand keeps my mind active every time I get on my scooter or into my car.

 

I can eat a variety of cuisines in a small radius of Chiang Mai.

 

I could exist in Australia, or live very well here.

 

Modesty prevents me from explaining how a 73 yo and his Thai GF get it on. I don't want to make you jealous.

[dave_boo]

42 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

"Personal attention in the shower?" Please do elaborate, I need a bit of titillation today.

Thing that came to my mind was the scene from "Once a Time in Mexico" where our illustrious poster was Cheech and his partner was Johnny Depp checking his "level".

[Wake Up]

28 minutes ago, whoareyou said:

 

Why not continue to rent? Better than marrying a total slut.

You forgot to mention that apart from good sex your going to have fights as well.. Eventually you will end up calling her a crazy whore!

And then you will get the 30 second death stare..

Why would you want that drama lol

 

Will never marry again. Just saying if I ever did I want a pro and not an amateur. And spending some time with some bar girls some are more honest more open and know more about real life than people who bash them or look down at them or criticize them. Sure some are greedy and liars etc. but that is true of the self proclaimed righteous critics and expats. If I married a bar girl I would have no shame because in reality most women are bar girls. Some just think they are better than others because they only have sex with one man or for most  women no sex at all after kids. If given the choice and I had to get married give me the bar girl for the few years I have left on this planet. But marriage is allowing a judge to decide the fate of your assets and spending a small fortune on lawyers. Very happy to have two kids but do not want another wife especially an older woman.  

[Kwasaki]

3 hours ago, elgordo38 said:

Me to plus the toe nail clipping, shaving, haircuts personal attention in the shower and the great smile. Its the stuff you can only dream about in the west. Heck I can even save a few sheckles a month. She smiles when I put the excess in her bank account. 

Well not really with my Thai wife as of now don't know what your insinuating but yeah things at first were great but going on nearly 13 years now so we have both calm down at bit and we have always had a joint bank account. 

[elgordo38]

30 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

Well not really with my Thai wife as of now don't know what your insinuating but yeah things at first were great but going on nearly 13 years now so we have both calm down at bit and we have always had a joint bank account. 

Its not insinuation its humor. 

[elgordo38]

1 hour ago, bazza73 said:

"Personal attention in the shower?" Please do elaborate, I need a bit of titillation today.

Glad to tit your lation 

[Kwasaki]

10 minutes ago, elgordo38 said:

Glad to tit your lation 

Shower Nah !!   In the bath or Jacuzzi was always better. 

[Ulic]

Thailand...........Disneyland for men. Of course many eventually get tired of the ride as

do kids in a candy store but it is nothing but fun when you indulge in semi-moderation.

[free123]

On 30.3.2017 at 3:17 PM, whoareyou said:

You pose valid questions but would get a more meaningful response if let's say it was an Alaska forum or East European forum.

The super cheap sex here will always be the glue that keeps most here. Even though many pretend it's not an issue

you can easy get sex in europe...i dont think it is worth to come here only for the women....count all together the visa the flight the other culture the hotel etc...and in top of this u have to pay for sex as well...at home call any sex hotline or join an adult dating site its way more easy and cheaper even free../ tons of asian,thai,chinese etc hookers in europe....so i dont think its the women only....

and many things here are more expensive than in europe...cars / the fact u cannot own ur own house which can turn out ur most expensive mistake / western food ( if needed ) /hospitalisation after a certain age or u take out an insurance that costs u an arm and a leg....sure lots of things are cheaper but the cheap often is of a lousy quality / a carpenter  a plumper any handyman ? only a few know their job well....most others mess it up.....I stay in a brand new condo first tenant and the place has  already many flaws ...a new building !!!!!....why i am here ...i honestly dont know gues another station in the journey of life...

[swissie]

4 hours ago, xylophone said:

I was a driven man and worked like the proverbial "bastard" most of my life, and mostly in stressful jobs (try managing $2 billion worth of other people's money!).

 

Always wanted success and worked hard to achieve it until the stress caused me to get sick.

 

My doctor said I had to change my life/lifestyle/work to something less stressful, but then again not easy when you've lived the lifestyle I had and were a driven man, and any new job I got, I would be in the same position, so I decided to sell everything and move to Thailand. The main reasons being: –

 

• I could retire here and never have to work again because my funds will outlast me by a long shot; even with a good lifestyle here.
• I would be stress free because I wouldn't have to work.
• I would have zero debt.
• Hopefully my health would improve, and that has proven to be the case.
• It is warm all the year round and I can put up with that.
• There is good healthcare here should I need it.
• There are also good restaurants and I frequent them quite often.
• I have made some good friends here.
• I have unofficially adopted the daughter of my last girlfriend and enjoy her company immensely and have pledged to pay her way through high school and university, and she appreciates this, as does her mother.
• I can travel back to NZ anytime I want and I have done on many occasions.
• I am free to come and go as I want, within reason.
• I like the nightlife from time to time and it stops me getting totally bored.
• Massages, pedicures, manicures etc I indulge in and like.
• And if I require female company it is available on all sorts of levels.

There are a lot of things which I don't like about the place, however above are the reasons I stay and although I occasionally dream about going back to stay in Nelson (in the South Island of New Zealand) I pretty well know that if I went back I really would be living the life of the pensioner that I am and in my view Western society really doesn't want to know old farts like me and I would just fade away. Here I feel vibrant, alive, respected and cared about.

 

 

Nice post.

But please elaborate on "stress, managing other peoples money, (2 Bills worth)." In good years, a Fund Manager rakes in hefty bonuses. In bad years, he still rakes in hefty bonuses ?!?! Of course, after a couple of "bad years", a Fund Manager is likely to get fired. So what? During his time he will have accumulated more funds in form of "bonuses", than an average mortal can accumulate in a lifetime in form of "work".

Personal "stress factor"? Where from ? In the old days, such a constellation was called "speculating on velvet".

- An average bloke, working in Farangland, financially not really getting anywhere, approaching 50 and not knowing if his job will still be around 3 months from now, THIS would strike me as a "stressful situation".
Never mind. Glad you managed to jump off the "merry go round" in time and found your safe haven in Thailand.
Cheers.

[elgordo38]

6 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

Shower Nah !!   In the bath or Jacuzzi was always better. 

Your just a young buck when I was your age I used to clean the table with one sweep of the hand and carry on up the Kyber from there. 

[davidst01]

22 hours ago, JAFO said:

Well Anotheruser, I think you know why I stay but for others here is a short list...

 

• I stay because I have a wonderful wife  and am quite happy and comfortable here.
• My quality of life is significantly better here then it was in the US due to financial pressures etc etc
• I enjoy my friends (Thai).
• I have an outstanding extended family (Small) .
• My BIl and Sil are working professionals. We speak both English and Thai(Albeit my Thai is marginal) but they are always willing to teach me.
• I love being in the position I can retire any time I want where as had I stayed in the US I would have to work until I die most likely.
• Our money really works for us here and I have zero debt. 
• I find Thai people (the ones I meet or have met) to be very friendly and pleasant.
• We own outright our a modest home on a few acres of land in Northern Thailand that is located near creature comforts should I desire to go to the movies, shopping or just walk around. 
• I live by a river so I can go fishing any time
• I can ride my mountain bike along the river trails
• There are incredibly good restaurants with good entertainment close by
• There is no traffic, congestion
• I love the weather in the North
• Traveling to secluded beach areas for getaways is easy  because I have a small airport not to far from us.
• Although I have not had to use it, we are near a very nice hospital

 

I could go on......

good post. Ops post is evidently based with negative connotations. Another guy writing a thread from his bar stool in pats

[xylophone]

12 hours ago, swissie said:

But please elaborate on "stress, managing other peoples money, (2 Bills worth)." In good years, a Fund Manager rakes in hefty bonuses. In bad years, he still rakes in hefty bonuses ?!?! Of course, after a couple of "bad years", a Fund Manager is likely to get fired. So what? During his time he will have accumulated more funds in form of "bonuses", than an average mortal can accumulate in a lifetime in form of "work".

A little bit off topic, however I will elaborate on what I said, and for the record, I was a salaried employee of a large bank so the huge bonuses which are apparently made by some fund managers, didn't eventuate in my case!

 

I was at the corporate and client interface end, starting the division in a large bank and although we set up the different portfolios, and managed that aspect, the funds were transferred to the actual fund managers. In effect I was responsible for acquiring and  managing the inflow of the funds and the expectations of the clients, the expectations of the divisions and the expectations and financial targets of the bank.

 

I was responsible for managing the Investment Advisory team and the back-office processes and the investment advisory team would interface with thousands of clients via hundreds of bank managers and branches. My peers included the top managers of Retail Banking, Business Banking, Rural Banking and Securities and I would have to interface and plan with these groups to ensure that their targets were met.

 

In addition I would have to liaise with marketing, insurances and a few other divisions that overlapped within the bank and I also had to arrange and oversee the investment training of 150 junior advisers in the retail banking network.

 

Other interfaces included the country's banking ombudsman, the Association of financial advisers, external actuaries and the organisation's legal team with regard to the publishing of investment advisory information.

 

I could go on but suffice it to say that when you have tens of thousands of clients (and thousands of staff) who at any one time can pick the phone up and get directly to you as regards to their investments, although you have managers under you and put filters in place, it can make life difficult.

 

And before I sign off, all of the divisions I have spoken about had their investment targets to meet, so I had a hand to play in them meeting their targets, as I had to meet my targets, so you can see that this was a little more widespread and convoluted then the everyday "fund manager", so perhaps my description understated the position quite markedly. For the record, having started that division in conjunction with another manager, we achieved 45% funds growth per annum year-on-year for 8 years.

 

Anyway thank you for your good wishes and I am still sure that I made the right decision......more so now I've revisited the above!!!!

[starky]

16 hours ago, free123 said:

you can easy get sex in europe...i dont think it is worth to come here only for the women....count all together the visa the flight the other culture the hotel etc...and in top of this u have to pay for sex as well...at home call any sex hotline or join an adult dating site its way more easy and cheaper even free../ tons of asian,thai,chinese etc hookers in europe....so i dont think its the women only....

and many things here are more expensive than in europe...cars / the fact u cannot own ur own house which can turn out ur most expensive mistake / western food ( if needed ) /hospitalisation after a certain age or u take out an insurance that costs u an arm and a leg....sure lots of things are cheaper but the cheap often is of a lousy quality / a carpenter  a plumper any handyman ? only a few know their job well....most others mess it up.....I stay in a brand new condo first tenant and the place has  already many flaws ...a new building !!!!!....why i am here ...i honestly dont know gues another station in the journey of life...

For sure and if you dont have yellow fever ( or even if you do) eastern european women smash asian girls looks wise as do south americans, who are also cheap and <deleted> a lot better than asians as well. Like their boring shuffle I dont think asians generally are good dancers or good in the sack. In fact most asians are, again generally, the least promisciuos race there is. Not in the least overly sexy or sexual actually quite prudish imo if your talking about sex workers and in general.

[anotheruser]

26 minutes ago, starky said:

For sure and if you dont have yellow fever ( or even if you do) eastern european women smash asian girls looks wise as do south americans, who are also cheap and <deleted> a lot better than asians as well. Like their boring shuffle I dont think asians generally are good dancers or good in the sack. In fact most asians are, again generally, the least promisciuos race there is. Not in the least overly sexy or sexual actually quite prudish imo if your talking about sex workers and in general.

 

I think you have under estimated what Thai bar girls and bar boys do for work. You can find sex anywhere and considering the price to fly to Thailand to engage a hooker's services it isn't that expensive in the west. 

 

However the Thai prostitute is more versatile than their western counterparts. Job duties include but aren't limited to the following...

 

Cutting nasty old fungus ridden toe nails, living with somebody who hates their culture and considers it an advantage he doesn't bother learning your language, 24/7 translator which can handle every detail of any transaction whether it be negotiating Viagra or going vegetable shopping, personal driver, gardener, egg cook, diaper changer, psychiatrist, doctor, bed pan attendant, sponge bath assistant, knowing when the guy is too drunk and taking him home, knowing when the guy is unhappy and actually needs a drink, apologizing upon his behalf on the daily basis he brings shame to the entire household, an ability to put up with somebody who is physically repugnant and morally reprehensible. etc. etc.

 

This can be found in Europe and other places but not as cheaply. The average monger in Thailand is very discerning and nothing less than the complete package will suffice for such esteemed individuals. 

 

To stay on topic the fact that people can't find anybody to do these things for them in the west is I would say a compelling reason that many stay here. :)

[TheLobster]

Samui. Not everyone's cup of tea but we love it here.

[starky]

58 minutes ago, anotheruser said:

 

I think you have under estimated what Thai bar girls and bar boys do for work. You can find sex anywhere and considering the price to fly to Thailand to engage a hooker's services it isn't that expensive in the west. 

 

However the Thai prostitute is more versatile than their western counterparts. Job duties include but aren't limited to the following...

 

Cutting nasty old fungus ridden toe nails, living with somebody who hates their culture and considers it an advantage he doesn't bother learning your language, 24/7 translator which can handle every detail of any transaction whether it be negotiating Viagra or going vegetable shopping, personal driver, gardener, egg cook, diaper changer, psychiatrist, doctor, bed pan attendant, sponge bath assistant, knowing when the guy is too drunk and taking him home, knowing when the guy is unhappy and actually needs a drink, apologizing upon his behalf on the daily basis he brings shame to the entire household, an ability to put up with somebody who is physically repugnant and morally reprehensible. etc. etc.

 

This can be found in Europe and other places but not as cheaply. The average monger in Thailand is very discerning and nothing less than the complete package will suffice for such esteemed individuals. 

 

To stay on topic the fact that people can't find anybody to do these things for them in the west is I would say a compelling reason that many stay here. :)

Hillarious best thing I have read on here in a long, long time. Well said Sir.

[canthai55]

Been a biker my whole life. Live to ride. Got married here after 12 years. All I want is here. All I don't want is there. Family great, roads great, food great. But Life is all about attitude - be a glass half full or a glass half empty person. Up 2 U. And I am 18 - now and forever.

[bazza73]

5 hours ago, starky said:

For sure and if you dont have yellow fever ( or even if you do) eastern european women smash asian girls looks wise as do south americans, who are also cheap and <deleted> a lot better than asians as well. Like their boring shuffle I dont think asians generally are good dancers or good in the sack. In fact most asians are, again generally, the least promisciuos race there is. Not in the least overly sexy or sexual actually quite prudish imo if your talking about sex workers and in general.

Thai women are not demonstrative in public. Possibly they are not good dancers. Not sexy or sexual? You must be in a different region.

[Blue bruce]

I live here because i have a better quality of  life on my pension than i would in America. Warm is better than cold. Thai women are more beautiful, sexual and more responsive than American women. enough said

[swissie]

12 hours ago, xylophone said:

A little bit off topic, however I will elaborate on what I said, and for the record, I was a salaried employee of a large bank so the huge bonuses which are apparently made by some fund managers, didn't eventuate in my case!

 

I was at the corporate and client interface end, starting the division in a large bank and although we set up the different portfolios, and managed that aspect, the funds were transferred to the actual fund managers. In effect I was responsible for acquiring and  managing the inflow of the funds and the expectations of the clients, the expectations of the divisions and the expectations and financial targets of the bank.

 

I was responsible for managing the Investment Advisory team and the back-office processes and the investment advisory team would interface with thousands of clients via hundreds of bank managers and branches. My peers included the top managers of Retail Banking, Business Banking, Rural Banking and Securities and I would have to interface and plan with these groups to ensure that their targets were met.

 

In addition I would have to liaise with marketing, insurances and a few other divisions that overlapped within the bank and I also had to arrange and oversee the investment training of 150 junior advisers in the retail banking network.

 

Other interfaces included the country's banking ombudsman, the Association of financial advisers, external actuaries and the organisation's legal team with regard to the publishing of investment advisory information.

 

I could go on but suffice it to say that when you have tens of thousands of clients (and thousands of staff) who at any one time can pick the phone up and get directly to you as regards to their investments, although you have managers under you and put filters in place, it can make life difficult.

 

And before I sign off, all of the divisions I have spoken about had their investment targets to meet, so I had a hand to play in them meeting their targets, as I had to meet my targets, so you can see that this was a little more widespread and convoluted then the everyday "fund manager", so perhaps my description understated the position quite markedly. For the record, having started that division in conjunction with another manager, we achieved 45% funds growth per annum year-on-year for 8 years.

 

Anyway thank you for your good wishes and I am still sure that I made the right decision......more so now I've revisited the above!!!!

Thanks for clarification. This puts a new light on your post. After such a professional nightmare, the more you deserve a happy and relaxed live in Thailand.
Cheers.

[swissie]

7 hours ago, anotheruser said:

 

I think you have under estimated what Thai bar girls and bar boys do for work. You can find sex anywhere and considering the price to fly to Thailand to engage a hooker's services it isn't that expensive in the west. 

 

However the Thai prostitute is more versatile than their western counterparts. Job duties include but aren't limited to the following...

 

Cutting nasty old fungus ridden toe nails, living with somebody who hates their culture and considers it an advantage he doesn't bother learning your language, 24/7 translator which can handle every detail of any transaction whether it be negotiating Viagra or going vegetable shopping, personal driver, gardener, egg cook, diaper changer, psychiatrist, doctor, bed pan attendant, sponge bath assistant, knowing when the guy is too drunk and taking him home, knowing when the guy is unhappy and actually needs a drink, apologizing upon his behalf on the daily basis he brings shame to the entire household, an ability to put up with somebody who is physically repugnant and morally reprehensible. etc. etc.

 

This can be found in Europe and other places but not as cheaply. The average monger in Thailand is very discerning and nothing less than the complete package will suffice for such esteemed individuals. 

 

To stay on topic the fact that people can't find anybody to do these things for them in the west is I would say a compelling reason that many stay here. :)

Half of my "Farang-Buddies" do not fit this description......but the other half does !!!
To improve this statistic I may have to hang around more often on the golf course and take up Polo playing on my next visit to Pattaya. After all, I want to polish-up my image as a "quality-Tourist".
Cheers.

[smotherb]

On 3/30/2017 at 2:47 PM, anotheruser said:

Did he say why he stays here by any chance?

Your reasons for staying are as limited as Charlie's were for leaving. As I said, I have a good woman--the best I know. She takes care of me in all ways and I can't help but love her for it--so women is not the reason I came or I stay.  I also have sufficient income to live in the States, or almost anywhere else I choose. I prefer Southeast Asia, have spent most of my adult life here; many of my friends and family are in SEA.

 

I am still here because of a commitment to family; but that should end in a few months. As I said, I am tired of Thailand. However, I have never had a place I called home--I was a service brat; so lived all over the States and Europe as a kid. I  have been an expat since 20 years of age--52 years now--and the longest time I have ever lived in one place was here, almost ten years in my current house. So, it's time to leave. Thailand is bearable, but I do not see it getting better. I feel I still have some more living to do and wish to do it elsewhere. 

[smotherb]

On 3/31/2017 at 4:18 PM, natway09 said:

Jane, Great Post.

Don't you just love these guys that have to tell us all the time that their partner/ wife 

was never a bar girl. Next ,, they will be saying that she was a virgin at 36?   Ha Ha

You do know that not every man marries a bar girl. I am always amused at the ones who get so upset when someone mentions their wife was not a bar girl. Do you think they are all lying to you? And, the ones who are lying, why not let them have their little fantasy; no skin off your nose, unless you are ashamed of your own situation.

[BuaBS]

I'm now enjoying a nice cool euro spring . The only reason for living in Thailand is rent. Here in euroland rent starts at 600-700 euro without utilities. That's at least 800 to 900 a month all in . In Thailand it's 270 euro all in . And there is no tax in Thailand >>> but no heath insurance too...

Sex is absolutely not a reason ! I can watch porn just as well here as in Thailand , but no censor in euroland ! Haven't paid for sex in 14 years.

[xylophone]

30 minutes ago, BuaBS said:

I can watch porn just as well here as in Thailand , but no censor in euroland ! Haven't paid for sex in 14 years.

Not much point in paying yourself is there!!