Cultural acclimation

[kunfish]

Been with wife for 5 years, long distance dating, then getting married 3 years ago, she coming to the US at that time.

 

She's taught me a lot about Mai Pen Rai and not getting upset and letting things go. It's been great for me as an American, because Americans, to me at least, tend to get irritated at the smallest things.

 

So I guess I'm blended culturally in that aspect.

 

This is my 5th trip back to Thailand, all 2 week stints. This is her 2nd time back in 3 years. She works in the States as a restaurant manager and her English is getting better by the day. She's a great woman (worked for Thai government for a long time).

 

It's funny to see her get irritated at other drivers not following the rules and being rude. Makes me laugh when she brings up stuff that would have been Mai Pen Rai before. Before, she used to laugh stuff off while driving when people cut her off or came too close to her car.

 

I just told her welcome to the world of being international and not fitting in anywhere and everywhere at the same time.

 

Nothing will ever be perfect. I do like Thailand a lot on this 5th trip and have learned to just take it easy. This is easy to do as you get older and appreciate time and health.

 

We may be moving here in a couple of years for both of us to retired.

 

 

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[kannot]

i refuse to accept mai pen rai, for many its sheer laziness and the results are often catastrophic

[kunfish]

i refuse to accept mai pen rai, for many its sheer laziness and the results are often catastrophic

Moderation is the key with anything in life.


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[keeniau96]

Got quite used to Latino version of mai pen rai working in South America and Mexico. Used to the manana, did't like it the and not now, but got to understand it is the way there and I will never change it. So adapt or move on; I stayed.

 

[kunfish]

Got quite used to Latino version of mai pen rai working in South America and Mexico. Used to the manana, did't like it the and not now, but got to understand it is the way there and I will never change it. So adapt or move on; I stayed.
 

Yeah siesta time. Understand that.

Wife was driving today hacked off driving like American and obeying laws then got frustrated and said "okay I'm back driving Thai. Watch out". Cracked me up and we both started laughing.


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[Thaidream]

The reason for Mai Phen Rai is simply to avoid confrontation which is anathema to Thais. Confrontation leads to potential loss of face which must be avoided at all cost.  A Thai who has lost face is dangerous and the person who caused it is in a precarious situation. When in Thailand-instead of becoming irritated and showing it- do as the Thais- smile about it and move on. Once a Thai person becomes angry-they are out of control-and everyone in Thailand should know what can happen at this juncture.

[kunfish]

The reason for Mai Phen Rai is simply to avoid confrontation which is anathema to Thais. Confrontation leads to potential loss of face which must be avoided at all cost.  A Thai who has lost face is dangerous and the person who caused it is in a precarious situation. When in Thailand-instead of becoming irritated and showing it- do as the Thais- smile about it and move on. Once a Thai person becomes angry-they are out of control-and everyone in Thailand should know what can happen at this juncture.

Pepper spray.

Thanks for the safety tip had a good Thai friend in USA who blew his top one day. Glad I was not present.

Ironically Thai people have no qualms making fun of you for being fat. Maybe just a family thing.


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[JAFO]

Welcome aboard Kunfish.  I enjoyed the same experience with my wife in the US. In Thailand very polite and quiet. 1 or so years later In the US she would go off on people that did her wrong.  Very amusing to watch her toss up the middle finger while driving and yell KWAI!!.  I lauged til it hurt  because she wasn't even driving. 555

To your point though. I have found the Mai Pen Rai to be reasonably refreshing.  People in the US are wound to tight over petty stuff. I see people lose it because they got short changed by .10 cents and some poor young gal gets trashed publicly.  

 

 

[kunfish]

Americans are a bored people by and large. They can have what they want and there are often no struggles for many. So they get hacked off over anything and are real petty.


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[jerojero]

i refuse to accept mai pen rai, for many its sheer laziness and the results are often catastrophic

Then, try Que Sera, Sera. Many Westerners could use a dose.

[w59]

What Americans do not understand, me included until the last few years when I became a Buddhist, is that in the Asian and Latin countries people work to live. We live to work. We are slaves to our possessions, fear their loss and crave more when we get bored with what we have. I like their way far better having lived in both Mexico and Thailand. Not everything needs to get done right now. Do not let a "to do" list get in the way of enjoying the moment.


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[Berkshire]

On 4/5/2017 at 6:12 AM, kannot said:

i refuse to accept mai pen rai, for many its sheer laziness and the results are often catastrophic

The term "mai pen rai" can be loosely interpreted to mean "don't sweat the small stuff."  As an American no longer in the rat race, I find this to be a much healthier perspective.  But as the Thais say, "up to you."