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ballpoint

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Everything posted by ballpoint

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    Finally, I went to a third place and said "I'm glad you're open with all this Covid going on. My hair needs cutting really badly". So he did.
  16. ballpoint
    Not liking the previous haircut, I went to a hairdresser and asked her if she could cut my hair like Liam Gallagher. She put a parka on, picked up her scissors and said "Alright then, sit down knobhead!".
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    I asked the barber if I could have my hair cut like Tom Cruise. He raised the chair and made me sit on a cushion.
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    I've got my first kick boxing class tonight. Hopefully I'll be able to quit boxing for good this time.
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    I've just been stopped in town, a woman in a yellow jacket said, "Would you like to put your hand in your pocket for Children In Need." I said, "Sure. I normally give money, but if you think it will help."
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    I just bought the Beatles version of Cluedo, but it's rubbish. Every game, the answer is Lucy in the sky with diamonds.
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    I've been trying my hand at writing. So far, it's a lot more successful than using my foot.
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    I went to library after work and asked if they have any books on coincidences. The librarian says, "Here's one that just arrived."
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    My next door neighbour had a penis extension. His house looks really stupid now.
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