ballpoint

I've got my first kick boxing class tonight. Hopefully I'll be able to quit boxing for good this time.

I've just been stopped in town, a woman in a yellow jacket said, "Would you like to put your hand in your pocket for Children In Need." I said, "Sure. I normally give money, but if you think it will help."

I just bought the Beatles version of Cluedo, but it's rubbish. Every game, the answer is Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

I've been trying my hand at writing. So far, it's a lot more successful than using my foot.

I went to library after work and asked if they have any books on coincidences. The librarian says, "Here's one that just arrived."

My next door neighbour had a penis extension. His house looks really stupid now.