siftasam

I had a similar problem. 1. Get an official police box on your gate/fence as near to the noise as possible. I pay 500 baht a month. It's well worth it, especially when I'm away. 2. Be at home when they fix it! Tell the police then and there before you pay any money, to enquire into the nuisance. Ask/'insist' that they speak to the proprietor immediately. (Give them a few baht for some beer?) 3. It is the duty of the police to check your house every day and they and you can write in the official little red book kept in the box. It is their duty to respond. 4. Be friendly and try to get names and phone numbers of those policemen. (They like a little money for a beer or two!) 3. If the nuisance persists, go to the police station with your lawyer. Show a 'top man' your red book with your daily (?) complaint (preferably in Thai). Play him an audio, if top man will not come out to your house personally. If you have Thai family, request a policewoman come out too. They can really lay down the law! If it's to do with family, the police cannot or will not refuse. (But don't offer her any beer money!) Yes, there are laws on pollution of the environment including noise. i hope pollution and the environment are 'hot' ASEAN topics now. And, if it works, please give me any advice you can on obtaining a Visa for my Thai gf to go with me to Switzerland) Cheers, Will, Good luck!

Many people, I'm sure, might think my life very boring. My life long passions have remained the same since I was a kid, so I can't complain, can I? I've been lucky and, because they are simple passions I've always been able to feel that I can fulfil them, and I have. They are reading, writing, movies, theatre, comedy, drama, history, sport and music. By the time I was 13 (in 1959) I was hooked on great novels, genius comedy shows like 'Hancock', the 'Goons' and 'Bilko'; and on Jazz. I still am. Every day! (Oh, and on girls! - but not, sadly, every day, even in Thailand!) The only thing I ever wanted to be was a writer like Galton and Simpson or Spike Milligna ('the well-known typing error'). My wonderful and learned English teacher wrote stories for 'Adventure' and the 'Rover' - I loved him! I was possibly the best kid at English in my school at 'O' Level. In the exam I wrote my first long 'humorous' essay - I only just scraped a Pass! After 39 years of full-time work, now I can fulfil my ambition. I've written 3 'funny' (?) novels (including ones on cricket and soccer) and 2 plays. No publisher wants to even look at them, much less read them. Even my own brother doesn't think they're funny! BUT I don't care! I'm happy. Because the wheel has turned full circle. At 75 years of age I'm a kid again!

Even after 13 years in Thailand, I'd never (I hope!) be rash or stupid enough to think that I understand Thai girls and the way that they think and sometimes behave. Girls from the Doi seem even more an enigma. I have a new friend from near Mae Hong Son and I'd love to understand her and (in dreadful modern parlance) 'relate' to her better. She can speak a little English - but can she speak only a little Thai? Would she ever admit to not speaking it? Surely (?) education for youngsters from the Doi must be very rudimentary? She will not tell me if she is from a Doi people. I have had friends before who are Akha, Lisu and Mon (Hmong) - they are similarly reticent. But the mountain girls can, of course, be stunningly beautiful. They show me photos of their family homes and seem proud of their heritage but, of course, must consider work in Chiang Mai. There are no opportunities at home. I love Thai girls but I am always wary of their background if they are from small, isolated communities because of their medical 'history'. Twice I have had friends who discover in their 20s and 30s that they have quite serious medical problems that could have been diagnosed 10 or more years before had they had a hospital or even a decent doctor near their home - and, of course, been able to afford treatment. Some problems must be inherited from mothers similarly placed. I have great sympathy for them but, even in Chiang Mai, when I could afford to help them, they are very reluctant to submit to hospital examination. Typically Thai (?) they don't want to know, are embarrassed and reluctant to admit that there is anything wrong - they are superstitious and fatalistic. The 'regular Western type' (!) menstrual cycle seems often completely absent. Do they miss the Doi very much? Are they (sorry to use another cliche) 'closer to nature? Are they instinctive? Limited intellectually? Perhaps, more important, intrinsically kind? Just as money orientated as many Thai girls appear to be (on my limited acquaintanceship!)? Used in their background to be submissive to males? Or is a girl a girl wherever she comes from? Please tell me more.

"Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down." (Woody Allen) No, I don't fear it. I'm a Raymond Chandler fan, so death is only 'The Big Sleep'. 'Where did it matter where you lay once you were dead? in a dirty sump or in a marble tower on top of a high hill? You were dead, you were sleeping the big sleep, you were not bothered by things like that...not caring about the nastiness of how you died or where you fell.' But, like so many others here, I fear the pain. Dad went through terrible years of cancer. I am not that brave. His father had an inoperable brain tumour and drowned himself. I saw how upset Dad was at the time, BUT I have no close family. Euthanasia is the answer if I am terminally ill, even if I have to travel to Europe for it. 'And you, my father, there on the sad height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage, against the dying of the light.' I think I'm a bit less concerned about it than Dylan Thomas!

"When it comes to burn as much money in a short period of time, then Switzerland is indeed an excellent choice. One of the most expensive countries on the planet." As you say, khun swissie, The only way I can afford it is to take advantage of any discounts and pay for as much as possible before going; in my case, for instance, a Bernese Oberland Travel Pass which will certainly save some money, and the train tickets from Zurich. I hope to book a hotel half board at as 'cheap' (!) a rate as possible given that retirement gives me some scope for dates. Fortunately, Oberland hotels seem to be uniformly good. My great concern will be obtaining a visa for a Thai girl friend from the Swiss Embassy. When I tried years ago I filled out everything correctly, including paying money up front, and she was still refused; frustrating and expensive! If you read this, I'd be grateful for any tips on getting a visa!

I wouldn't cross the road to listen to Bocelli. I'll stay at home and listen to Caruso, Gigli, Martinelli, Schipa, Bjorling, Bergonzi, di Stefano, Corelli, Domingo, Pavarotti, Carreras, Lanza, Tauber, McCormack etc. Really good singers.

Terrible voice. Blunders about the stage. All publicity hype. I think Lisa's good though.

If so, she can pay her own way (and mine!)

Oh, just the job, mate! She looks in the Pink? The Blackpink?

Great, Will! Problem is getting her a Visa. The last time I tried to get a Visa for a Thai girl she was refused and I had a heated exchange at the Swiss Embassy in Bangkok. I filled out all the forms correctly. You've had considerably more success than me. Should I have also attached a pleading letter? The attitude of the Embassy then was very disappointing; so sad, because, like you, I love Switzerland. And, my God, I do want to take her to the 'heaven' that is Wengen!

For the first time in my life (I'm aged 75 now) I have serious medical problems: a blood clot in my leg and I'm awaiting an operation to take out my gallbladder. When I get over all this <deleted>, I'm heading off to Switzerland and the Bernese Oberland next summer. Mindful of my leg, I'm going to lie on a flat bed in Business Class (having flown Economy all my life). And I'm going to take a young pretty Thai lady with me (if I can find one). I guess it will be my last trip to Europe so <deleted> the expense!

Another one was: "Don't do what I do, do what I say."

Did Mum or Dad have any favourite adages or sayings to help guide you through life? Did they really turn out to be true and wise? Did you take any notice? Too late maybe? My Mum had three favourites: "You're not put on this earth to be an ornament." "The world doesn't owe you a living." "Be good. If you can't be good, be careful." What 'wise' advice did you give your own children? Did they listen?

I was slightly peeved last week when I enquired at a big Bangkok Bank branch in CM about opening another account. I already have a Fixed Deposit one and I was enquiring about opening a Foreign Currency account. I was told I must bring along my passport and a letter from Immigration. SCB sensibly wanted only my passport as I already have a Current Account with them; so ,yes, I'll try another branch of BKK!

It's been great at Lamphun over the years! I hope nothing's changed (although I suspect it has). A local clinic doctor issued me with my first chit about 12 years ago. He had an A4 size paper in his hand. He said in good English "How are you feeling?" I replied "Good"; so, he ticked about 8 boxes. He then opened the 'dotty' colour blind testing book and said "Can you read this number?" I did. "Good. Correct. And," turning the page, "this one?" I did. "Very good. And", turning the page, "lastly, this one?". Ah, I thought, a wily Oriental trick! I'm not falling for this, Doc. "There isn't one." He gave me a very strange look and held the book closer. "Now?", he said. I shook my head. He moved the book close to the end of my nose (I have a big hooter) and asked, "Can you see it now?" "I'm sorry, I can't," I replied truthfully and helplessly. "27," he whispered. "27," I said. "Well done," he told me, tickled the paper and said, "50 baht please." Last time I renewed, the reaction and alignment tests were a hoot. There were about 20 of us in the same small space. I was the only farang. A very old man was struggling with both tests, but passed because all the other Thais bawled at him when to brake and what else to do. I don't care if he was a hazard on the road. It was all so wonderfully funny and so Thai!

I'm reminded of one of those appallingly presented (but irritatingly engaging) 'Buying Property Abroad' programmes on UK TV. A young English couple, he an investment broker in his early 30s, who'd decided that he'd 'worked hard enough to retire', wanted to buy a large but dilapidated country house in Tuscany. She, seemingly clueless, 'was looking forward so much to a wonderful restoration/renovation project' They decided to buy this place (well, the countryside around is gorgeous). I suspect they hadn't done enough homework because above the front door (or portal as they called it) was a finely chiselled stone panel giving the date of the house falling into disuse and the word 'terremoto'. Even I can guess that that means 'earthquake'! I wonder if they're still there?

Do you want an ultimate fantasy? (sadly unachievable!): I would rent a chalet in the Bernese Oberland in Switzerland for the summer months - near to Wengen, and go up and down the cable cars, funiculars and chair lifts, and go hiking to my heart's content. And, oh! The cheese and the chocolate! Then spend the winter above the Costa del Sol - maybe Mijas, or one of the beautiful whitewashed villages, not too far from Seville and Granada.

There's only choice for me in Asia. Some wonderful girls in my village asked me "Why you like Thai girls?" Naturally, I replied that Thai girls are (or can be) so beautiful. They laughed and said: "Oh, but have you seen Vietnamese girls? They are even more beautiful!" They'd been to Vietnam and they meant it! In Europe, Spain and France (if I could afford it - a pipe dream!)

"Get out of bed (11 a.m. is fine), roll your sleeves up, and get stuck in!"

'Golden Triangle'? Yes. it surely is, whichever way you look at it.

I don't believe all this stuff about old guys having young sexy partners or wives. Prove it. Let's see some photos please!

from 'The Hammer2021' 'Their employment conditions are in line with local cultural standards and you are imposing a western model which is a form of colonialism.' Thanks for that. It gave me a good laugh. Explain please or invest in a dictionary (Chambers is very good).

Just look at the Spurs team in 1962.....such talent under a great boss, Bill Nicholson. Greaves, Blanchflower, Mackay, Jones, Smith and more.....I was 16 and loved to watch them (and so did everybody else) I think Glenn Hoddle is correct on YouTube - Jimmy was uncanny. He was continually looking over his shoulder, seeing where the ball was, where all the defenders were, and assessing where he should be. He was a born goal scorer - there are few of his genius. He seemed to be always in the right place at the right time. He shone ever brightly, fed by the speedy and tricky Cliff Jones and the perception of John White, one of Scotland's greatest ever players. And with the ever bustling, aggressive Bobby Smith (who seems amazingly forgotten - 208 goals for Spurs in 317 senior appearances, and 13 goals for England in 15 appearances). he had a perfect partner - as he later found with a different sort of player, Alan Gilzean. One on one with any goalkeeper there was only one winner. He has that absolute confidence against keepers that few strikers show (Thierry Henry was another) RIP Greavsie. He died a month after another goal scoring great, Gerd Muller. Both so deadly in the box. We may never see their like again

On a bad road near Lamphun villagers put soil in a 'deep' hole and planted a banana tree about four feet high. The hole was filled in about three weeks later.