Repatriating with a Thai wife

[GinBoy2]

So after a decade or so, I came to a breaking point earlier this year. The insanity of Thailand finally got to me and I knew I needed to go home. If not 100% of the time, I certainly needed a substantial part of 12 month period  around people that at least had a brain that was functional on the same frequency as me.

 

But enough about me, the point of this post was mainly to describe my wife's reactions 

 

So we moved back to South Dakota, a State devoid of people, let alone an expat Thai community. Where we live in the Black Hills is beautiful, which helps, but there was for sure some extreme culture shock. After the initial honeymoon period there was some extreme homesickness. Now language is always a factor. She 'spoke' good enough English and I spoke enough Thai for that never to be an issue in Thailand. But, here that became an issue really fast, especially the written English deficiency.

 

Thankfully there was a local 'English as a Secondary Language' and that brought her up to speed really quickly. After that it seemed to unlock a bunch of doors. Prior to that, even being able to pass a Drivers license test was impossible, which meant she was reliant on me to go anywhere.

 

Now had this been my previous home in California, it might have been easier, but in some respects the lack of a Thai, or indeed much of any Asian expat community in some respects forced an accelerated assimilation.

 

That being said, we have now established links with the Phillippino and Thai communities here, and that helped on the food  front a lot, making Mrs Gin a much happier lady.

 

So almost our first year here, life has pretty much stabilized. My plan was always to return to Thailand for the winter, but Mrs Gin has, now she can make her Somtam and Noodles curiously it seems wants to see snow, and she says wants me to teach her how to ski!

 

Roll on snow I guess

[DipStick]

Nice for a change to read a positive repatriation post, so well done to both of you. It appears that your wife has made the effort to overcome the obstacles thrown at both of you, and that to me shows her commitment in making your marriage work.

Too often I read that Thai wives are apt to throw in the towel, start mixing with other Thais, getting involved with other men and placing huge stresses on their helpless husbands.

well done to both of you.

[billbenbob]

Your first paragraph sums me up to a T . I have lived quite an idealistic life with my wife for the last 14 years beautiful house, quite days . That has now all changed with changes in the neighbourhood I won't go into details but real madness has prevailed.I will now go on another journey with my wife and live back in the UK. As my wife says we can close the house down and use it as a holiday home LOL. I think the worst thing you can do hear is to read to much Thai Visa its OK for for the first few years of living here you tend to think it's all a bit of a joke but as time goes by you realise what an insane country you live in.


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[Thaidaddy]

After working here for the past 20 years I cant wait to relocate back to Sydney. Mostly miss the different seasons, access to my foods; and easier travel to shops etc. My Thai wife of 20 years cant wait to get back as well. She has plenty of Thai friends in our area.

 

[bazza73]

1 hour ago, Thaidaddy said:

After working here for the past 20 years I cant wait to relocate back to Sydney. Mostly miss the different seasons, access to my foods; and easier travel to shops etc. My Thai wife of 20 years cant wait to get back as well. She has plenty of Thai friends in our area.

 

Be prepared for the culture shock of Sydney property prices, unless you have already bought there.

I don't miss Melbourne at all. Freezing in winter, boiling in summer.

[gjoo888]

Having lived in Colorado during my college years, never would I live in a cold weather climate again. Then again, I sure wish Thailand was a bit cooler most of the year. 

[Here It Is]

4 hours ago, billbenbob said:

I will now go on another journey with my wife and live back in the UK. As my wife says we can close the house down and use it as a holiday home LOL. 

Out of interest, does your wife have a British passport?

 

My wife has resided with me in the UK for the past eight years and, other than the winter months, enjoys living there.  We come out here twice a year to visit her folks.

 

She has excellent English skills, including reading and writing, and also has a small circle of Thai-UK friends as well as English and European, which all obviously helps with her integration and feeling of homeliness.

 

She particularly enjoys the eclectic range of food available in the UK and, as with most Thais ladies, is a great cook.  We frequently visit the European mainland which also keeps her chipper. 

 

I purchase an annual Skype account so that she can phone her mum daily [her mum doesn't do the internet] so I have to stump up, but never mind.

 

All in all we both get a good deal from the status quo.

[sometimewoodworker]

17 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

Roll on snow I guess

Snow and cold weather is one of the things my wife really likes about Japan and our trip to Korea 

 

Air temperature about -10C 

 

11 hours ago, Here It Is said:

I purchase an annual Skype account so that she can phone her mum daily [her mum doesn't do the internet] so I have to stump up, but never mind.

$10 per month for 5 hours talk time per day to Thai mobiles and landlines  Stump up!!! Try not using Skype! And see how you like your phone bill.

Edited November 20, 2017 by sometimewoodworker

[Here It Is]

10 hours ago, sometimewoodworker said:

$10 per month for 5 hours talk time per day to Thai mobiles and landlines  Stump up!!! Try not using Skype! And see how you like your phone bill.

It's really not an issue and can't recall implying it was.

[GinBoy2]

So I've had a few PM's regarding Thai TV.

I can't comment really on whats available outside of the United States, but I subscribed to Mailmar TV out of San Diego. They provide live HD TV stream from Thailand, plus a full back catalog of all your 'favorite' Lakorns!

I use it an their Roku app, so it just like normal TV. Here at least it never buffers, so is pretty bulletproof.

 

It makes Mrs Gin happy

 

https://www.malimar.tv/device

Edited November 23, 2017 by GinBoy2

[tingtongtourist]

You were right about one thing. It is quite enough about you, after the first paragraph.

 

Really..calling the whole country insane and you angry you cant find anyone with a brain in their head?

 

 

 

[GinBoy2]

Just now, tingtongtourist said:

You were right about one thing. It is quite enough about you, after the first paragraph.

 

Really..calling the whole country insane and you angry you cant find anyone with a brain in their head?

 

 

 

tingtong, might well sum you up my friend!

[tingtongtourist]

6 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

tingtong, might well sum you up my friend!

Thats funny, cos i dont think i did write enough about myself for you to "sum me up"

 

But you do a good job of summing up the whole of Thailand so thats about right!

 

You say theres not many people around where you are, that will surely help in finding someone who match you superior brainpower.lol

 

[GinBoy2]

7 minutes ago, tingtongtourist said:

Thats funny, cos i dont think i did write enough about myself for you to "sum me up"

 

But you do a good job of summing up the whole of Thailand so thats about right!

 

You say theres not many people around where you are, that will surely help in finding someone who match you superior brainpower.lol

 

Maybe if you had the 'brainpower' to even unststand what tingtong means, maybe you might think twice about making inane flame comments. Go back to your barstool and have a nice, if delusional life

 

Edited November 23, 2017 by GinBoy2
Typo

[richard_smith237]

12 minutes ago, tingtongtourist said:

Thats funny, cos i dont think i did write enough about myself for you to "sum me up"

 

But you do a good job of summing up the whole of Thailand so thats about right!

 

You say theres not many people around where you are, that will surely help in finding someone who match you superior brainpower.lol

 

What possesses you to drag down a positive thread in such a manner? 

 

All you you have succeeded in doing is to draw attention to your 'gone native, need to over defend any criticism' manner, which implies a certain lack of experience here in Thailand.... aka rose tint... 

 

Things can and do seem whacky for people who have spent their time here and have 'gone full circle'... 

[GinBoy2]

3 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

What possesses you to drag down a positive thread in such a manner? 

 

All you you have succeeded in doing is to draw attention to your 'gone native, need to over defend any criticism' manner, which implies a certain lack of experience here in Thailand.... aka rose tint... 

 

Things can and do seem whacky for people who have spent their time here and have 'gone full circle'... 

Thank you

[tingtongtourist]

5 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

What possesses you to drag down a positive thread in such a manner? 

 

All you you have succeeded in doing is to draw attention to your 'gone native, need to over defend any criticism' manner, which implies a certain lack of experience here in Thailand.... aka rose tint... 

 

Things can and do seem whacky for people who have spent their time here and have 'gone full circle'... 

Oh haha, so i am all those things because i  call out the guy who says the whole country is insane and no one has a brain. 

 

The same thing could be said about the country and its people that voted in Trump.lol

[theguyfromanotherforum]

Meh....this sounds like a woman one day being depressed and next day calling you honey because you upped the allowance.

 

Waiting for the exact opposite thread in 2 months.

[ELVIS123456]

16 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

Oh haha, so i am all those things because i  call out the guy who says the whole country is insane and no one has a brain. 

 

The same thing could be said about the country and its people that voted in Trump.lol

We all now know who and what you are.  Go have another beer and whinge about life somewhere else - try the anti-Trump posts.

    

[ELVIS123456]

Thanks for the post ginboy - similar situation myself.  Back in Aust while I wait for the pension, but I cant wait to get back to LOS.  

The wife likes it here except for how expensive everything is - but very much misses LOS and the family.  Getting access to Thai food and Thai TV Movies etc has also been a great help.  And always watch for the 'wrong type' of Thais - anyone single/divorced is to be avoided.  Probably in the future we will do a bit of both - some time here and some time in LOS.  

[GinBoy2]

Well as Christmas day is upon us, time for an update.

Well it seems Mrs G has done the reverse of the 'farang in Thailand gone native' thing. She's turned more American than me. I like the holidays, but never been much for the whole decoration thingy. Not so Mrs G, she went all out to embrace the holiday, festive doesn't even come close!

Been surprised how well she has dealt with the cold. We've has some pretty frigid days in the past week with some pretty serious snow, but she's totally into it, much to my surprise.

We've got my daughters, husbands and grandkids here for the holiday, and she's decided we're doing a Thai/American Christmas dinner menu.

All in all, not been a bad story. Pleased we did it, I've become a lot happier being back home and closer to my kids, but planning to go back to Thailand late January for a few months, before returning to the US as per my original plan of 'snowbirding'

Edited December 25, 2017 by GinBoy2

[GinBoy2]

Thai Chili fish, Rice, Orange Soy Duck, Roast Potatoes, Steamed Shrimp, Prime Rib with of course more chili sauce, with assorted vegetables ended up a very curious culinary success.

New family tradition!

[ChiangMaiLightning2143]

South Dakota? A lucky man. Every story like this I head previously ended in grief for the Farang. Beimg as once the Green Card was in hand the Thai lady took off to join "Ned Olesen" in town (cold storage, real estate) with more money.

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[GinBoy2]

3 hours ago, ChiangMaiLightning2143 said:

South Dakota? A lucky man. Every story like this I head previously ended in grief for the Farang. Beimg as once the Green Card was in hand the Thai lady took off to join "Ned Olesen" in town (cold storage, real estate) with more money.

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I think one thing that was in my favor was age!

 

A lot of the failures tend to be when the 60 year old farang takes his 30 year old bride back to farangland, and she suddenly discovers a whole bunch of young studs with money.

 

For me and Mrs G, she’s 5 years younger than me, but in the scheme of things we’re both old farts at this point.

 

Sometimes guys need to wise up, recognize that; you’re 60 she’s 30, come on this is 'money for love’ expose her to a regular, not the Thai mia noi world, is only going to end in tears