-
Recently Browsing 0 members
- No registered users viewing this page.
-
Topics
-
-
Popular Contributors
-
Latest posts...
-
0
Operation Dumpling Drop: Where Have All the Hot Tigresses Gone???
Once upon a time, Thailand was a land of silky curves, cheeky smiles, and women so dangerously fit you’d need a seatbelt just to walk past them. Now? Forget it. The once-sleek jungle cats have been replaced by something a lot closer to water buffalo. Look, I’m not saying everyone’s gotten fat. I’m saying if this trend continues, the national flower will be a fried chicken drumstick wrapped in clingfilm. I used to see tigers in the wild. Sleek. Fierce. Dangerous. Now I see pandas in yoga pants licking salt off their fingers and calling it a personality. What happened? Was there a national campaign to eat every carb in a five-mile radius? Are they breeding in food courts now? There’s a 7-Eleven near me that’s basically turned into a snack-based mating arena. You’ve got girls triple-wielding steamed buns, cheese toasties, and that weird orange sausage thing like they’re in an apocalyptic food-eating contest. One even had two bubble teas at once. I thought she was dual-wielding insulin shots. And don’t get me started on the gym situation. I went to one last week. Empty. Dusty. One sad treadmill being used as a handbag stand. The only squats anyone’s doing lately are to reach a fallen pork rind. I haven’t slept with one in well over a year. I tried. I really did. I wore some moo-satay cologne. I smiled. I used big words like “emotional availability.” Nothing. They just looked at me like I was a spring roll they forgot to order. One even said, “No boom boom, just food food.” I wept. Now I’m stuck swiping through dating apps where the profiles read like buffet menus. “Love eating. Food is life. Big arse, big belly, big heart.” This isn’t hate. This is grief. This is mourning. I came here seeking tigers. Dangerous creatures. Seductresses. And instead I’ve been left with aunties in crop tops chasing me with grilled chicken and marriage proposals. Please. If you’re out there. If there’s still one tiger left in the jungle, send me a sign. Flash a thigh. Do a squat. Put down the fried banana. I’m begging you. Used to be, you’d walk down Sukhumvit and your neck would snap from whiplash every ten steps. Now the only thing snapping is the elastic waistband of someone’s knockoff Hello Kitty leggings. And they just sort of roll over these days. Literally. One tried to mount me. I sprained a rib escaping. I don’t know what they’re feeding them, but it clearly isn’t self-control. Sticky rice and regret? Fried chicken dipped in condensed milk? I saw one eat mango with coconut cream and then chase it with a plate of fried pork skin dipped in what I can only describe as industrial-grade palm oil juice. And she said, “Diet starts Monday.” Monday 2045, I assume. It’s like every food delivery app is now a co-conspirator. Who needs charm when you’ve got a motorcycle boy bringing you moo ping three times a day? Honestly, I’m not fat-shaming. I’m fat-noticing. There’s a difference. And I’d just like to lodge an official complaint with the Ministry of Aesthetics. Because this tiger’s lonely. And celibate. And no one wants to hear that from a man with a wallet full of money and no normal-sized tigresses to spend it on. -
129
Trump gets an Deportation Set-back
You’ve proven nothing except stating your opinion. -
1
Fire Fire Breaks Out on Classic Yacht Off Sattahip Coast
Well done reaction by jet ski and speedboat, trying to extinguish the fire...👍 -
6
Re Entry Permit at C/W
Yes that's a given. Bit inconvenient IMO for those folks -
16
Video Thai Man Seeks Justice After Vandalism Incident in Pattaya
That dude is insane. -
3
The Left versus Right False Dichotomy, and "The tyranny of contrived opposites"
I think many countries have tried to address this problem in the way they run their countries mixing Socialism/Liberalism& day to day capitalism. Many countries in Europe for example with some more left than others and other countries more right than others. But the dichotomy remains.
-
-
Popular in The Pub
-
.thumb.jpg.3ee24d9400fb02605ea21bc13b1bf901.jpg)
.thumb.jpeg.d2d19a66404642fd9ff62d6262fd153e.jpeg)
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now