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Durian, to infinity and beyond...

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Alien spaceships lit up the northern sky as their number grew. Leaders of nuclear-armed countries huddled in the blast-proof basement of the UN building in NY debating how to repel this technologically superior species.

 

Suddenly, news came from the ground. A Thai man, thought to be none other than their leader General Prayuth, had ridden a bamboo chair lifted by a thousand helium balloons, to silently reach the line of alien craft. Upon which the brave Prayuth tossed a sack of durian at the enemy, jumped off his chair and parachuted safely to the ground.

 

The aliens instantly fired laser beams at the sack causing it to explode and release a cloud of durian fume which enveloped the first craft, then the next, spreading rapidly in the thin air as it blanketed the entire flotilla. 

 

Then came a strange sight as humanity watched in awe from a mile below. One alien craft after another turned and in a flash of ultraviolet streaked off at warp speed into space - toward the Triangulum galaxy according to astronomers - to finally leave a pleasantly empty sky populated by the usual clutch of stars, a half-moon, and a mildly sickly sweet stench over the entire northern hemisphere.

 

And that, my friends, is how General Prayuth brought happiness to the whole planet. 

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