Worst Joke Ever 2025

[overherebc]

6 hours ago, ballpoint said:

It's upside down.

[xylophone]

 

Blonde!!

[ballpoint]

7 hours ago, ballpoint said:

What idiot left the caption off the photo?

 

[DezLez]

On 10/22/2022 at 4:52 PM, overherebc said:

If the lamp post is missing the dogs will have nothing to go on.

Are you taking the pee?

They can still walk on the pavement/sidewalk although how they will see at night with no lamp posts might be a problem since there are not cat's eyes for them to use!

[DezLez]

8 hours ago, ballpoint said:

If you dig down deep enough, you might just get a handle on it if you have not gone to pot already and fried your brains!

 

[DezLez]

8 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Is he sitting still waiting for another promotion or just so cocksure that he can now pi!ss in the wind with impunity!

[ballpoint]

43 minutes ago, DezLez said:

If you dig down deep enough, you might just get a handle on it if you have not gone to pot already and fried your brains!

 

That should pan out well.  I thought I'd planted it in soil with too many woks in it.

[DezLez]

14 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

That should pan out well.  I thought I'd planted it in soil with too many woks in it.

Out of the frying pan and into!!!!

 

PS; are we allowed wok(e) jokes/comments or are you giving me a grilling and I am now toast?

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[roo860]

[roo860]

[chickenslegs]

[roo860]

[roo860]

[owl sees all]

A big motorway crash unfortunately led to four nuns dying. St Peter was waiting for them at the gates of heaven..

 

He spoke to the four nuns. "I'll ask you a question and if you answer truthfully, and agree to do as I say, you are free to go through the gates and enter heaven."

 

To the first nun he said; "Sister Alice; did you ever touch Father Thomas' penis?"

"Yes, but only with my little finger."

St Peter told her; "Go to the font of holy water, and wash your finger."

She did as requested. St Peter nodded, and Sister Alice walked through the gates.

 

St Peter said to the second nun; "Sister Matilda; did you ever touch Father Thomas' penis?"

"Yes, but only with my hand."

St Peter replied; "Go to the same font full of holy water, and wash your hand."

She did as requested, St Peter nodded, and Sister Matilda walked through the gates.

 

There was a little bit of argy-bargy with the last two nuns. St Peter saw that one of the nuns was trying to force her way in front of the other.

 

St Peter asked; "Sister Teresa. Why are you trying to force your way in front of the other sister?"

"Well Peter, I thought it better get my gargle done, before Sister Mary had to wash her backside."

[MJCM]

Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven.

Willis: I'll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.

 

[ballpoint]

Did you hear Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles played each other at tennis?

It was endless love.

[ballpoint]

These so called "Speed Bumps" are rubbish.

If anything they just slow you down. 

[Neeranam]

1 hour ago, MJCM said:

Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven.

Willis: I'll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.

 

saying what?

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

Safety first!

Common sense second.

[chickenslegs]

4 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

saying what?

 

[ballpoint]

And next on the "there's no hope for some people" list...

 

[ballpoint]

Redneck jump leads

[ballpoint]