Worst Joke Ever 2025

[fasteddie]

[roo860]

[Crossy]

A doctor in Dublin wanted to get off work and go fishing, so he approached his assistant .

"Murphy, I am going fishing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients".

Yes, sir!" answers Murphy.

The doctor goes fishing and returns the following day and asks: "So, Murphy, how was your day?"

Murphy told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so he did, I gave him Paracetamol."

"Bravo Murphy lad, and the second one?" asks the doctor.

"The second one had indigestion and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir" says Murphy.

"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.

"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman bursts in so she does. Like a bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, taking off everything including her bra and her knickers and lies down on the table, and shouts: 'HELP ME for the love of St Patrick! For five years I have not seen any man!'"

"Thunderin' lard Jesus Murphy, what did you do?" asks the doctor

"I put drops in her eyes."

[roo860]

[roo860]

[roo860]

[Yellowtail]

[Yellowtail]

[Yellowtail]

[Yellowtail]

[MJCM]

Changed all my passwords to Kenny.  
 

Now all I have are Kenny Loggins.

[oxo1947]

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[oxo1947]

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[ballpoint]

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[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[ravip]

[ravip]

[scottiejohn]

3 hours ago, oxo1947 said:

.

After he has bitten them off!

[scottiejohn]

3 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Do you think anyone would fall for that?  I checked online and it's not true, it's her "husband" David! from the village of Little Bottom in Fillet, Herts.

[scottiejohn]

3 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Barking up the wrong tree again!

[Crossy]

Brits of a "certain age" only ...