Worst Joke Ever 2025

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[sanuk711]

1 hour ago, ravip said:

Never found all 27.

You want to think about starting a new thread with this--- I have many of them also, other sites give a small prize--- & its quite popular. 

[ravip]

8 minutes ago, sanuk711 said:

You want to think about starting a new thread with this--- I have many of them also, other sites give a small prize--- & its quite popular. 

Would be a good idea, if more people are interested. 

[tifino]

4 hours ago, sanuk711 said:

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reminds me of my box full of mobile phone lithium cells all bloated 150% size...

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[WorriedNoodle]

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[WorriedNoodle]

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[ravip]

A man lays sprawled across three entire seats at a posh theatre. Before the show has even started, an usher walks by and notices the man.

“Sir, you're only allowed one seat, can you please sit up?"

The man groans, but remains seated. The Usher becoming impatient with the man, "sir, if you don't get up, I will need to get my manager involved"

 

Again the man just groans, which infuriates the Usher as he marches off to get the manager. In a few moments he returns with the manager and they both repeatedly attempt to move him, but with no success. It was at this point that the manager calls the police.

 

Moments later, a police officer arrives and approaches the man, "alright buddy, what's your name?"

 

"Sam" the man moans.

"And where ya from Sam?"

With pain in his voice Sam replied, "the balcony".

[ravip]

A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you. Don't bother coming after me.”

Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.

 

After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.

 

She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note.

 

After a few minutes, he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone.

 

"She's finally gone...yeah I know, about bloody time, I'm coming to see you, put on that sexy French nightie.

 

I love you...can't wait to see you...we'll do all the naughty things you like."

 

He hung up, grabbed his keys and left.

 

She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed.

 

Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote...

 

"I can see your feet.

We're outta bread: be back in five minutes.

[tomazbodner]

A very rare photo of a truck stopping for a sip of water...

 

[tomazbodner]

For smooooooth ride

 

[tomazbodner]

Words of wisdom: It's better to be a black sheep in the family than a white sheep at butcher's...

[tomazbodner]

See yourself?

 

[tomazbodner]

Wife comes out of the changing room at a clothing shop and says to husband: I think it's too small for me.

 

Husband: The dress or changing room?

[tomazbodner]

Severe traffic jam, cars aren't moving for hours, when I noticed a man walking from car to car, explaining something... finally he got to my car, knocked on window so I asked...

So what's happening?

Man: Ah, some terrorists kidnapped our entire government and demand 100 million dollars or they'll pour gasoline on them and set them alight!

Me: My God! And what are you doing??

Man: I'm collecting donations...

Me: Really... How much do people usually contribute?

Man: That depends... but usually between 1 and 2 liters...

[tomazbodner]

And I always wondered where he ended up...

 

[tomazbodner]

Last time shopping for a dog when drunk...

 

[jvs]

Colon.

Colonized.

Not really strange non English speakers get a bit confused.

 

[tomazbodner]

Which order do cars enter this junction?

 

 

They didn't know either...

[tomazbodner]

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[tomazbodner]