3 rednecks were working on a cell phone pole: Cooter, Pete and KC.

As they started their descent Cooter slipped, fell off the tower and was instantly killed.

As the ambulance took the body away Pete said, “Well damn, someone should go tell his wife."

KC said OK, I'm pretty good at that stuff. I'll do it."

2 hours later he came back carrying a case of Budweiser.

Pete said, “Where’d you get that beer, KC?"

That’s unbelievable!” Pete exclaimed. “You told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"

“Well, not exactly", KC said. "When she answered the door I said, ‘You must be Cooter's widow.’”

She said, ‘You must be mistaken, I'm not a widow.’

Then I said, “I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are."

"A silly man covers his balls when running naked through a crowd, a wise man covers his face "

Confucius

I found my first gray pubic hair today.

Things like this don't normally bother me but this was in my coffee at Starbucks.

George, a 72-year-old retired man, was relaxing in his recliner when his wife, Martha, walked in and said, “Honey, could you please help me clean the garden?”

George didn’t even look away from the TV. “Do I look like a gardener?”

Martha sighed. “All right then… can you at least fix the bathroom door?” George scoffed, “Do I look like a carpenter?” With that, he grabbed his hat and walked out.

A few hours later, George came back home and was shocked. The garden was spotless, the door was perfectly fixed.

He smiled proudly and said, “See, Martha? I always knew you could handle things yourself!” Martha crossed her arms. “I didn’t do it.” George blinked. “Then who did?”

“Our neighbor John,” she said casually. George frowned. “Oh… how much did you pay him?”

Martha smirked. “Didn’t cost a thing. He gave me two options—either bake him fresh bread… or spend some ‘quality time’ with him.”

George nearly dropped his cane. “Well, I sure hope you baked him some bread!”

Martha raised an eyebrow and said, “George… do I look like a baker?”

I was confused when I saw this. Says Sky News Australia... but the content is kind of funny. The world is changing, no doubt!