People and social media

[5633572526]

People have not changed social media has just made it more obvious 

[JAFO]

15 hours ago, Katia said:

people have said to me before, "you're never in your pictures!" and I say, "You know what I look like, but the picture is of Wat Arun/this mountain/whatever." 

I never take pictures with me in them nor do I take Selfies.  I am an "off the beaten path" type. Forget taking pictures of shit everyone has seen and posted billions of times everywhere. I always laugh when I see huge crowds of people jockeying for position to get a pic of a major monument or area. 

 

But then again I don't post pics on social media sites either looking for feedback or acceptance.  I travel and see things for me, not to show others where I have been or visited or what I am up to. I routinely take photos or videos of things people don't typically see or are oblivious to them.  

 

 

[Pharoticus]

On 3/10/2019 at 6:52 AM, JAFO said:

I have read the studies as well and my real time observations seem to support it.  I do not use social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. I use messenger or phone to keep in touch with friends and family on the other side of the world. Most of the time I call. What I find disturbing is as someone mentioned earlier about people engrossed in their phones in groups or walking into a restaurant and seeing people taking pictures of their food and the endless selfie behavior.

Don't forget people use forums to the same end. Like you said in the OP,  "showing pics to others saying "Look at me" in hopes others respond with "I'm jealous" or "Your so lucky" etc etc. The fact of the matter is those folks aren't really happy at all. It's all a facade."

 

Yep. All true. These people are often pretty lonely, too.

 

Studies show they get little dopamine hits from seeing their posts or pics "liked". It's pathetic, but there's a lot of unfulfilled people out there. 

[OneMoreFarang]

Social media is like the internet, TV, emails, cars, and many other things.

We can use them in positive ways or in negative ways.

If we are smart we pick the good sides and avoid the bad part.

 

It seems many people do social media excessively. Thousands of friends, all the time updates about their food, their location, this and that.... That's strange - at least for me.

 

But if people stay in contact with others all over the world maybe because they are friends since many years, have common (rare) hobbies, etc. There can be many opportunities.

 

Social media has definitely one advantage: If I see people in a restaurant who take pictures until their food is cold and then look at their phones all the time I know that these are definitely people I don't want to mingle with.

And the idiots who look at their phone (and social media) while they walk over busy streets give Darwin a chance to do his work.

[Nyezhov]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It seems many people do social media excessively. Thousands of friends, all the time updates about their food, their location, this and that.... That's strange - at least for me.

It is somewhat strange to update strangers about your life but some folks truly enjoy reading about other people. In real life, I have about 10,000 followers on FB and IG (and I follow no one) so I have to post something every day. I was going to stop but once time I got a message from an older lady who thanked me for posting pics of a Thailand trip because she was in a wheelchair and would never get to see it. So what the heck, it encourages me to seek the bizzare. Its all part of the morning ritual, wake, bake, post, then off to do stuff.

[OneMoreFarang]

17 minutes ago, Nyezhov said:

It is somewhat strange to update strangers about your life but some folks truly enjoy reading about other people. In real life, I have about 10,000 followers on FB and IG (and I follow no one) so I have to post something every day. I was going to stop but once time I got a message from an older lady who thanked me for posting pics of a Thailand trip because she was in a wheelchair and would never get to see it. So what the heck, it encourages me to seek the bizzare. Its all part of the morning ritual, wake, bake, post, then off to do stuff.

And if you do this everyday don't you feel a little observed like stalkers all around you.

I.e. if I come out of my building in the morning I see people and they see me. And maybe the usual Thai question: Where do you go? Sometime I answer, sometimes not, and often something like "I go to eat".

If you publish this every day don't you think at least from time to time: Why should they all know what I am doing? And if the pictures include you and maybe some others: Should everybody know who you meet when and where? I wouldn't be happy to have that information everyday on the internet.

[JAFO]

1 hour ago, Nyezhov said:

I have about 10,000 followers on FB and IG

That screams about a lot of weirdness.  

[JAFO]

2 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It seems many people do social media excessively. Thousands of friends, all the time updates about their food, their location, this and that.... That's strange - at least for me.

Excessive is right.  Some people friend friends of friends to increase their "following". They long for the acceptance so they post relentlessly. It's like Crack Cocaine, after you hit the pipe for the first time you chase that high forever and it never happens and most OD doing it.  Social media is similar in that they post and get likes so they post more to get more likes chasing acceptance by more and more.  

 

Sad really because if you took that media platform away from many, they would likely off themselves.  Like a really bad withdrawal.  

[StreetCowboy]

I enjoy telling stories about my bike rides, and occasionally reading and reliving the adventure - that’s easier than riding the same road again.

 

I also enjoy reading tales of other people’s rides and what they’ve seen and where they’ve been, especially if they are well illustrated with appropriate pictures

[StreetCowboy]

18 minutes ago, JAFO said:

That screams about a lot of weirdness.  

I have about two on the cycling sub-forum.

That’s a big improvement on the rugby league thread. 

[Nyezhov]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

And if you do this everyday don't you feel a little observed like stalkers all around you.

I.e. if I come out of my building in the morning I see people and they see me. And maybe the usual Thai question: Where do you go? Sometime I answer, sometimes not, and often something like "I go to eat".

If you publish this every day don't you think at least from time to time: Why should they all know what I am doing? And if the pictures include you and maybe some others: Should everybody know who you meet when and where? I wouldn't be happy to have that information everyday on the internet.

Naw dude, its not necessarily about where I am and what I am doing, its like Buddha pics, food pics, street pics, ruminations, thoughts of the day,  News articles...very rarely a pic of me and even rarer of someone else....on IG its all my photography...so its not like Im under the microscope.....

[villagefarang]

One friend is in Tokyo right now, another is in Greece, another in Alaska, another in New Zealand and one other is in Paris.  My wife ran her first half marathon on Sunday and last week hosted a group of life coaches  who spent two days mentoring teenage inmates at the local prison with great results.  Before that she ran in another race and got the miss photogenic prize.  And the list goes on…

 

We like following our active friends and love their photos on Facebook and Instagram.  In turn many are motivated by what my wife does and the organizations she is actively involved with.  Nobody in our group is fake or depressed.????

[Khaeng Mak]

33 minutes ago, villagefarang said:

One friend is in Tokyo right now, another is in Greece, another in Alaska, another in New Zealand and one other is in Paris. 

This post is meaningless unless you also provide us with your definition of friend.

[Nyezhov]

2 minutes ago, Khaeng Mak said:

This post is meaningless unless you also provide us with your definition of friend.

A friend is anyone who would lend me a C-note and never speak to me again. 

[villagefarang]

18 minutes ago, Khaeng Mak said:

This post is meaningless unless you also provide us with your definition of friend.

Most of the people mentioned we have known for around twenty years.  Most are Thai and all we have stayed at their homes and they have stayed at ours.  We know them and their families well.  They live in Bangkok or Chiang Mai and one couple lives in Hawaii.

[Khaeng Mak]

1 minute ago, villagefarang said:

Most of the people mentioned we have known for around twenty years.  Most are Thai and all we have stayed at their homes and they have stayed at ours.  We know them and their families well.  They live in Bangkok or Chiang Mai and one couple lives in Hawaii.

So if social media was never invented you would still have kept in touch with these people anyway. Using much more tangible means of course such as visits and letter writing.

[villagefarang]

6 minutes ago, Khaeng Mak said:

So if social media was never invented you would still have kept in touch with these people anyway. Using much more tangible means of course such as visits and letter writing.

It would be much more difficult, less immediate, less interactive and less fun.  People move and change phone numbers and I have lost count of how many friends and family members I have lost touch with over the years.  Thailand is a very transient place and I came here before the internet so have experience doing it the old fashion way and the modern way.  I much prefer the modern way.

[Khaeng Mak]

1 minute ago, villagefarang said:

It would be much more difficult, less immediate, less interactive and less fun.  People move and change phone numbers and I have lost count of how many friends and family members I have lost touch with over the years.

So what differentiates between the friends you have lost touch with and those who you still interact with online?

[villagefarang]

5 minutes ago, Khaeng Mak said:

So what differentiates between the friends you have lost touch with and those who you still interact with online?

Our friends online I know how to contact, while the others have moved so many times or we have moved and  we don't know where they are anymore.  If someone stayed in one place I guess that might be less of a problem.

[Khaeng Mak]

9 minutes ago, villagefarang said:

Our friends online I know how to contact, while the others have moved so many times or we have moved and  we don't know where they are anymore.  If someone stayed in one place I guess that might be less of a problem.

But surely you wouldn't ever lose track of a good friend, regardless of their whereabouts?

[villagefarang]

1 minute ago, Khaeng Mak said:

But surely you wouldn't ever lose track of a good friend, regardless of their whereabouts?

That has nevertheless been my experience with both friends and family.  If they are not online I don't know where they are.  I am not very clingy by nature but I am occasionally curious about some people who were in my life before.  It would be nice to know what happened to them but I guess I will never know.

[Khaeng Mak]

12 minutes ago, villagefarang said:

That has nevertheless been my experience with both friends and family.  If they are not online I don't know where they are.  I am not very clingy by nature but I am occasionally curious about some people who were in my life before.  It would be nice to know what happened to them but I guess I will never know.

That's so dreadful. The only friends you now have in life are ones that are active on social media. My closest 6 friends do not even have a facebook account.

[OneMoreFarang]

Looking through the posts here TV members are no social media users or sensitive social media users - at least that's the way it seems to be.

 

That brought up the idea: Do excessive social media users also use things like i.e. this forum? Or is this kind of format not good for their ego?

I don't know - just asking.

[villagefarang]

9 hours ago, Khaeng Mak said:

That's so dreadful. The only friends you now have in life are ones that are active on social media. My closest 6 friends do not even have a facebook account.

You are of course entitled to your opinion but I do not find it dreadful at all.  I feel I have been unencumbered by people or the past.  That has afforded me the freedom and independence to live a less traditional life.  There has never been anyone up in my business trying to influence how I live my life.

 

My first twenty years in Bangkok were a whirlwind of people and experiences which I found very interesting and exciting.  When I finally decided to end my single life in my mid forties, I felt it was imperative to make a clean break.  No relationship could have survived dealing with my past.

 

That was over twenty years ago and all my present day relationships were formed as a couple over the years since then.  To be honest I don’t have any “my friends”, I only have “our friends”.  There are no ex-wives or children either which some people find strange.  Again, I don’t feel my situation is dreadful at all, and I have an amazing life where I am quite happy.

[villagefarang]

44 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Looking through the posts here TV members are no social media users or sensitive social media users - at least that's the way it seems to be.

 

That brought up the idea: Do excessive social media users also use things like i.e. this forum? Or is this kind of format not good for their ego?

I don't know - just asking.

Generally I would think people find one format or the other better suited to their needs.  I do both and suspect that as the older generation dies off, the forums will die off with them.

[Katia]

On 3/11/2019 at 2:57 AM, JAFO said:

I never take pictures with me in them nor do I take Selfies.  I am an "off the beaten path" type. Forget taking pictures of shit everyone has seen and posted billions of times everywhere. I always laugh when I see huge crowds of people jockeying for position to get a pic of a major monument or area. 

 

But then again I don't post pics on social media sites either looking for feedback or acceptance.  I travel and see things for me, not to show others where I have been or visited or what I am up to. I routinely take photos or videos of things people don't typically see or are oblivious to them.  

 

 

I don't post pictures "looking for feedback or acceptance," either.  I post pictures for people who will never see, in person, the things that are in the pictures.  Do I hope they like them?  Yes, of course, that's the point of showing them to other people in the first place-- because they will like it and find it interesting to see something they would not have otherwise.  I've loved seeing other people's pictures, so why wouldn't I "pay that forward"?

[MiNombreEsFicticious]

On 3/10/2019 at 8:23 AM, marcusarelus said:

What research?  Actually research says people social media are well adjusted and those that don't are not.  

Glad you asked : https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/11/181108164316.htm 

[MiNombreEsFicticious]

On 3/11/2019 at 5:44 PM, Pharoticus said:

Don't forget people use forums to the same end. Like you said in the OP,  "showing pics to others saying "Look at me" in hopes others respond with "I'm jealous" or "Your so lucky" etc etc. The fact of the matter is those folks aren't really happy at all. It's all a facade."

 

Yep. All true. These people are often pretty lonely, too.

 

Studies show they get little dopamine hits from seeing their posts or pics "liked". It's pathetic, but there's a lot of unfulfilled people out there. 

And parents with the strictest rules limiting their kids' social media usage are those employed by the likes of Apple, |Facebook and Google. They know better than to ruin their kids forever with their company products.

[Pharoticus]

4 hours ago, MiNombreEsFicticious said:

Glad you asked : https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/11/181108164316.htm 

Excellent link.

 

I also think social media users are more likely to be depressed prior to signing up. I think they use these services because they're lacking real-world interactions.

 

If you're busy, gregarious, and have a normal social life, there's just no need for this nonsense.

[Pharoticus]

4 hours ago, MiNombreEsFicticious said:

And parents with the strictest rules limiting their kids' social media usage are those employed by the likes of Apple, |Facebook and Google. They know better than to ruin their kids forever with their company products.

Do you have a link for this? It'd be great if you do.