Thailand: The Early Years

[GalaxyMan]

I just remembered that there was this Thai guy who each day would drag two large shipping trunks full of books down to the beach wherever it was that I was staying on Samui. Truly have no clue and I doubt if I did back then, either. He would rent the books for 5 baht/day (30-35=$1 in 1983, I think it was). I've always been a voracious reader, so I was in heaven. I had this inner tube that I got from the people running the bamboo huts I was staying at and a big rope and a large building block. I'd take a bottle of Mekong and paddle out about 100m and throw the block over with the rope tied to it and the inner tube. Then I'd drink Mekong and read until I passed out. It was a great way to recover from traveling in China.

[geronimo]

Continued .....

 

Teaching English

Despite my many years of backpacking around Europe, teaching my mother tongue was new to me. I had considerable experience picking fruit & veg, building laboring, waiting tables, driving and painting, yet this was to be a new feather in my cap, so I answered a newspaper ad to go to ECC HQ in Siam Square, very confident of getting hired.

 

I sat a 50 question grammar test and was appalled to discover I scored a measly 13! They asked me when I could start! It seemed the only qualification I needed was to be white and own a shirt and tie, and while I definitely qualified for the first, the shirt and tie were soon acquired and I headed off to my very first private class!

 

I knew enough to know that teachers had lots of pens, and I had 8 clipped into my top pocket, which, even I had to admit, made me look like a veteran teacher.

 

My first class consisted of half a dozen Thai teenagers, who I was supposed to entertain for 3 hours, and with my track record of winging it, I felt supremely confident as I strode manfully into the classroom.

After a brief introduction, I asked the kids what we were studying and they produced this locally printed grammar book and opened it at page 89, then suddenly, this rather porky looking lad stuck his hand up,

 

“Teacher, is “have been having” past perfect continuous”?

I nodded and thought for a second,

“Now that is a very good question” I began, “and does anyone of you know the answer?”

I was met with blank stares,

 

“OK, here’s what we’ll do, I will go to the rest room and you guys see if you can come up with the answer” I bluffed very convincingly.

 

I hurried into the staff room and buried my head into a grammar publication and found the answer,

Then I returned to the classroom and wrote “have been having” on the whiteboard,

 

“Can anyone give me a sentence using have been having?” I asked.

A girl at the back raised her hand

“I have been having a cold” she announced.

I groaned.

Another student’s hand shot up,

“Teacher, teacher, I have been having had the having”

 

We spent the remainder of the 3 hours talking about Manchester United, Chelsea and Liverpool, and I have to say, it was the longest 3 hours of my life.

 

I soon realised what was expected of me, to entertain these middle class rich kids, and entertain them I did! It turned out that the goal was to make the kids happy, and if they enjoyed it, the parents were happy, and if they were happy, so was the school!

 

The other teachers were indeed a mixed bunch, a couple of oldies who had seen it all, and few younger guys who were only interested in female company, I guess I was a little bit in between, and being the popular chap that I am, had soon won over all the Thai staff.

 

While the students’ English abilities didn’t seem to be improving, my Thai was coming on in leaps and bounds, and I practiced at every opportunity. I had already realized that this country was where I would spend the rest of my life, and the language was the key to a smooth experience, and my evenings were spent conversing with the locals over a few cold beers.

 

Bruce the Aussie

Bruce was a full on heroin addict who rode a beat up old 750 motorcycle, and when he arrived at work in the morning, he looked like death warmed up, but after a rather long toilet break, he’d be bouncing around with a huge smile on his weathered face. I made a mental note never to try the magic white powder, and Bruce turned up without his trustee bike one morning, which was unusual.

 

I enquired about this and he told me he couldn’t remember where he’d parked it the night before, but he was very confident that his memory would return, thus revealing the whereabouts of his beat up old Honda.

 

Turned out that he spotted it laying on the side of the road at a major intersection, all mangled and mashed, and rather than claim it, he decided to leave it there!

 

Bruce was 28 years old, which I thought was a major achievement, given his demeanour, yet his antics convinced me he’d never make it to the magic 30, and a few weeks later I heard that Bruce had been badly beaten up by a gang of motorcycle taxi riders. Turned out one of them tried to overcharge him for a ride so he beat the guy round the head with a piece of wood. Needless to say he and a few of his mates made a late night call to Bruce’s apartment and duly beat the crap out of him!

 

I’m not sure if he was deported or was sent home in a box, but leave Thailand he did!

[Paul Catton]

On 5/29/2019 at 1:38 PM, geronimo said:

I blog for a living, so most of my time is taken up with roofers in Perth or used cars in London, yet I will find the time to pen the rest. Meantime, it would be great for other expats to share their experiences.

 

I'm sure I'm not the only one who has had some unique experiences, and I enjoy reading the replies.

 

As for how long this series will last, the first episode was in 1985 and I'm still here!

 

Perhaps another 4 or 5 and that will be it guys!

 

Enjoy Life

Chapter 1 (prequel).

 

Coming over to Thailand in the late 70's, and we, all being dependent teenagers with our fathers working in Saudi Arabia, ourselves also earning good money (illegally) working alongside U.S.Military under sub-contractors, "GOOD MORNING, THAILAND", 

I think we probably provided script for much of "Hangover 2" 

 

Songthaew surfing in our desert sandals along the promenade from Pattaya Mid-North to main street town, (no walking-street back then).

 

Sliding on sanded roads was fairly common, and if you damaged a hired-motorcycle, all was smiles back then, a bit of extra cash for replacement of wing-mirror, back rear light, rubber finials and perhaps a touch-up paint.   

 

"Aussie Des" had a bar at the Southern end of the strip, there was a caged bear outside, poke your finger and you would get bit.

 

"Sky Rocket" firecrackers were in abundance.

 

Pattaya beach, you could actually swim there back then, water was clear.

Renting one of the few jet-skis available was a blast, until one almost killed me, motor cut-out shore proximity for return. hopped off and was impaled underwater with a resurgent wave on the shoreline. Adrenalin kicked in and I with strength, never yet found again, survived from self extraction, I do believe that inadvertently defecating under a life/death situation might have led to the current cesspit situation there!