Child Support Payments

[Clifford S]

Hi All

 

I have 2 half Thai kids with my ex Girlfirend ie NEVER married.

We have legitimised our children in the local Thai court a few years ago.

The Ex has applied for Sole Custody, I'm prepared to agree to Dual Custody, or failing that I will Counter Sue for Sole Custody and my lawyers believe I have a stronger case than hers.

We have a Court Mediation session in a month, so I've just been doing some research on TV.

BTW Yes I do have (expensive) lawyers working on my case and attending the Court sessions.

 

I read in one of the threads from a few years back :

"The court prefers a lump sum payment for child support rather than monthly payments."

Is this really the case, how do the Courts expect a Father to come up with (upto 20 years) on payments in one go ?

 

In the same thread it was also mention if things were not settled in Mediation the case could go on for years ?

Can Anyone give me there advice or actually experiences on the above 2 points ?

 

And any details of their time at the Mediation session would be nice to know too...

 

Cheers

Best

Cliffy....

 

 

 

 

[FritsSikkink]

prefers isn't the same as requires.

[Mavideol]

13 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

prefers isn't the same as requires.

I would prefer a democracy, no 90 days reporting, no 800 K in fixed bank account and all the hassle and tackle with the visa issues, really would prefer..... unfortunately can't require, same as the court

[BritManToo]

3 hours ago, Clifford S said:

n the same thread it was also mention if things were not settled in Mediation the case could go on for years ?

Can Anyone give me there advice or actually experiences on the above 2 points ?

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

Thai courts have no way to enforce payment of child support unless you are working in Thailand.

And even then only from registered jobs with WP, tax, SS payments.

Edited May 27, 2019 by BritManToo

[FritsSikkink]

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

Thai courts have no way to enforce payment of child support unless you are working in Thailand.

And even then only from registered jobs with WP, tax, SS payments.

It are his kids too. Great father you are. 

[BritManToo]

48 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

It are his kids too. Great father you are. 

I provide 100% for all my kids living with me, if she wants them with her, she can pay for them.

Never understood the western idea of taking the kids (and money) from dad who can support them, and giving them to a worthless layabout mom who won't work.

Edited May 27, 2019 by BritManToo

[KiChakayan]

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I provide 1oo% for all my kids living with me, if she wants them with her, she can pay for them.

Never understood the western idea of taking the kids (and money) from dad who can support them, and giving them to a worthless layabout mom who won't work.

So, maybe, but I'll rephrase Frits' question: "Where are you feelings for your kids" ?

[FritsSikkink]

23 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I provide 100% for all my kids living with me, if she wants them with her, she can pay for them.

Never understood the western idea of taking the kids (and money) from dad who can support them, and giving them to a worthless layabout mom who won't work. 

Why would you marry a "a worthless layabout mom who won't work." in the first place? 

[CharlieH]

Its not a case of giving 20 years in a lump. Its making a capital offer to finish with it.

This happens with many issues, "payoff" if you like, it also illiminates the occurences of cases defaulting further down the line etc.

 

What happens is the greed takes over, they see the lump sum rub their hands together and thats that, and there is little intention of actually using it for what it was intended.

Just a way of getting the money, which as you know, is all that seems to matter to many.

 

 

[Clifford S]

Thanks Gents for your thoughts...

 

I'm sure the lump sum which in my case would be about another ten years, would be gone in half of that time, and thhen I'd have to start paying again...monthly this time !

 

Ps No WP or job here, but a bit of property...

[cooked]

In my experience the Thai family courts really do look out for the best interests of the child.

In my experience also, lawyers on both sides may decide in advance on the result of a case and participate in the financial awards. So a lump sum would possibly suit them better.

The traditional village justice system decided that in the case of separation of parents, girls go to the father, boys to the mother, and this idea is still around.

[eezergood]

its a tricky situation - but one I may alps be facing, please update how this goes if you can 

[dotpoom]

I can't see a "lump sum" being of any help to your children.

  I gave 2 lump sums to my ex G/F...(2 years wages on each occasion)...both times the money was gone by the end of the first six months.

[NoshowJones]

On 5/27/2019 at 5:55 PM, FritsSikkink said:

Why would you marry a "a worthless layabout mom who won't work." in the first place? 

That is a very easy question to answer, it is really so obvious.

Think of why most westerners come here to retire in the first place. Although not so much now due to immigration issues and the strength of the Thai Baht.

 

Edited June 6, 2019 by possum1931

[Lacessit]

On 5/27/2019 at 5:55 PM, FritsSikkink said:

Why would you marry a "a worthless layabout mom who won't work." in the first place? 

Because that was not what was on the table initially.

[Lacessit]

IMHO lump sums are an open invitation to visit the ATM again. Far better to maintain a drip feed.

[Tomahawk21]

On 5/27/2019 at 5:31 PM, BritManToo said:

I provide 100% for all my kids living with me, if she wants them with her, she can pay for them.

Never understood the western idea of taking the kids (and money) from dad who can support them, and giving them to a worthless layabout mom who won't work.

you forgot to mention the lay about mom who is just looking for a meal ticket off all these stupid farangs.

go britmantoo your winning this one 555

Edited June 6, 2019 by Tomahawk21

[Tomahawk21]

On 5/27/2019 at 5:55 PM, FritsSikkink said:

Why would you marry a "a worthless layabout mom who won't work." in the first place? 

why would you marry any woman ?

[KhaoYai]

On 5/27/2019 at 7:43 AM, BritManToo said:

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

If you're being serious, that's a disgraceful comment. I'd like to think you were just being controversial?

 

Thankfully the OP feels differently and wants to support his kids. Personally, I'd never give any Thai woman a lump sum payment - not if you want there to be some left when its actually needed. Monthly payments far better.

[BritManToo]

31 minutes ago, KhaoYai said:

If you're being serious, that's a disgraceful comment. I'd like to think you were just being controversial?

 

Thankfully the OP feels differently and wants to support his kids. Personally, I'd never give any Thai woman a lump sum payment - not if you want there to be some left when its actually needed. Monthly payments far better.

No, I'm being serious.

I won't be handing any of my money to a woman who teaches my kids to hate me while denying me contact and spending the money on herself and her new boyfriend, who is probably a pedo playing her in order to bang my kids.

But all my children are more than welcome to live with me while I will provide for them and protect them without any need for anyone else's contributions.

Edited June 6, 2019 by BritManToo

[Autonuaq]

On 5/27/2019 at 8:43 AM, BritManToo said:

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

Thai courts have no way to enforce payment of child support unless you are working in Thailand.

And even then only from registered jobs with WP, tax, SS payments.

Thai court now have the way to enforce the payment of abroad, correct. Yiu forget to menation inamy countries they have goverment realated offices that will do on behalf of the parent and children when they have a court order.

The thai court order will be tranferred in a local court order and that order will enforce you.

 

Thai is a member of that network.

 

 

The best for the half thai children is to have then educated in the west.

Half thai are seen as half thai sadly enough.

 

If you have the cusotdy then all is easir.

 

When take abroad bewise an arrange the offical persmissio that the childern are allpwed to leave Thailand as well register this at the local ampur too.

 

Also have all translated and leglaized document with you, especially the court order as well the DNA test results and the copy of the registration if that you are allowed to leave Thailand with the childern.

And also you can need the when you enter your country of choice where you want to life.

 

The registraion at the ampur and permission to leave are needed to protect yourself in the future from any (internationaly) child obduction claim done by the family or village heads left behind.

 

Most omportant is to know the children are the most important. As well the ability to have a good education and development to adults with a good selfesteem and view on life.

[tlandtday]

On 5/27/2019 at 1:43 PM, BritManToo said:

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

Thai courts have no way to enforce payment of child support unless you are working in Thailand.

And even then only from registered jobs with WP, tax, SS payments.

that's a pretty low thing to do... you have kids but should not help them... what kind of guy are you?

[KhaoYai]

55 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

No, I'm being serious.

I won't be handing any of my money to a woman who teaches my kids to hate me while denying me contact and spending the money on herself and her new boyfriend, who is probably a pedo playing her in order to bang my kids.

But all my children are more than welcome to live with me while I will provide for them and protect them without any need for anyone else's contributions.

Maybe that's your experience but not everyone's is the same. If your ex was a 'wrong 'un' then I can see why but the OP here has not made any mention of wrong doing by his ex - he's asking for advice not bitterness.

 

Far too much talk on TV about bad Thai women, I've experienced both good and bad but rather than blame the woman, I blame myself for making poor choices. A lot depends on where you meet your partners - you'll be lucky to find clean fish in a dirty pond.

[Tony125]

58 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

No, I'm being serious.

I won't be handing any of my money to a woman who teaches my kids to hate me while denying me contact and spending the money on herself and her new boyfriend, who is probably a pedo playing her in order to bang my kids.

But all my children are more than welcome to live with me while I will provide for them and protect them without any need for anyone else's contributions.

Sorry, but in many cases, you know that the Thai woman will not get a good enough job to make enough to support children properly. You mention your not going to pay a woman who teaches her kids to hate you , denies you axcess and whose new BF/husband may be sexually or physically abusing your kids. Forget about being a dad what kind of man would leave HIS kids in that situation? I have a daughter (USA) who when we split  mom tried to bad mouth me to her and limit my access. Her family wasn't having that and when my daughter realized what her mom had done stayed with me at 17 when her  mom decided to move out of state. I had to pay my daughter to go visit her mom after a while. She graduated from University and rarely contacts her mom now. You could have Thai court mandate dual custody and visits but don't take your anger out on your kids just because you don't have total control/access to them ,That's totally unfair to them.

[Pilotman]

On 5/27/2019 at 1:43 PM, BritManToo said:

Don't give her any money at all for the kids, if she can't support them, she shouldn't have them.

Thai courts have no way to enforce payment of child support unless you are working in Thailand.

And even then only from registered jobs with WP, tax, SS payments.

If HE couldn't support them THEY BOTH shouldn't have had them. Takes two you know. People who have kids and then choose to ignore their clear responsibility for jointly caring for them financially, are beyond contempt. In fairness to the OP, he is not saying he doesn't want to pay up, he is concerned about how that is achieved. and under what conditions, which is fair enough. But, he should still start from the position  of: "it's my responsibility to contribute financially, regardless"

Edited June 6, 2019 by Pilotman

[Dene16]

On 5/27/2019 at 4:31 AM, Clifford S said:

I read in one of the threads from a few years back :

"The court prefers a lump sum payment for child support rather than monthly payments."

An awful lot of crap being talked about on this topic

Bottom line, you pay a lump sum, there is a huge probability that the money will be spend in a very short period of time. Requests of more money for support will inevitably be made and any refusal or minimum payment by yourself could result in problems of custody refusal and general access to your children

The only real option for peace of mind, is to make payment on a regular basis,  allowing you to be in control (for lack of a better word)

  

[remorhaz]

Unless its your child getting the money directly it isn't *child support* it's *mommy support* and if money is really the mostest importantest thing in the universe why not give the child to the parent with the most money?  Oh because in the West the first rule of law is "DUH!!! VAG!!!!!" but thankfully this is Thailand and things are much more sensible.  

 

Don't pay a lump sum and don't pay child support.  Tell your kids that if they need something to ask you but I guarantee that mommy will sell/pawn any bike or nice thing you ever buy for them because of her putting her needs first.  The whole best interest of the child is a complete bullshit and you can see this on display with women in the great depression in America literally selling their kids to fill their own bellies.  

[BritManToo]

48 minutes ago, remorhaz said:

Unless its your child getting the money directly it isn't *child support* it's *mommy support* and if money is really the mostest importantest thing in the universe why not give the child to the parent with the most money?  Oh because in the West the first rule of law is "DUH!!! VAG!!!!!" but thankfully this is Thailand and things are much more sensible.  

 

Don't pay a lump sum and don't pay child support.  Tell your kids that if they need something to ask you but I guarantee that mommy will sell/pawn any bike or nice thing you ever buy for them because of her putting her needs first.  The whole best interest of the child is a complete bullshit and you can see this on display with women in the great depression in America literally selling their kids to fill their own bellies.  

At last someone who understands the great western female on male government con game.