No Contact Rule - With a Crazy Thai ??

[TimShady]

Hi Guys & Girls,

 

I'm a newbie here and very glad to have found this forum. At first I thought I was the only one in the world with a completely unreasonable hot tempered Thai girl friend, but after reading lots of the threads here - this species and temperament seems to be much more common! 

 

I've been in Asia for 18 years, Hong Kong & Vietnam but only in the past 18 months did I settle down and decide to really try and build a nice relationship with someone who I thought was a nice girl. I've really put my heart and soul into this relationship but I'm running out of steam.

 

Objectively looking back, despite my long presence in Asia I really didn't understand the Thai brain at all. The more I read on this forum there are some serious communication issues that westerners & thais face when it comes to conflict resolution and the how we deal with problems.

 

Luckily I've got some money, she gets her comfortable little salary each month and fancy new car but underneath the "Hi SO" persona and fake smiles she's a down right nasty bitch. Every time we have some type of small argument it turns into World War 3 , some times it tuns violent (from her), then if I raise my voice or defend myself in anyway she tries to covertly record me and film me and it's just an ugly ugly mess. She then threatens to send these video's to my employer to destroy my career and label me as an abusive person which I'm not, but after being hit with a Champagne bottle and then grabbed around the throat it's human nature to push some one away and raise your voice. 

 

For me this is all just total shock as I have never had any of this in any of my relationships in my life - ever!!

 

Why am I here am I an idiot - PROBABLY .. but the thing that keeps me going is that the 90% is just amazing but the 10% is sheer terror and to be honest the 10% is becoming so bad it's almost worth walking away.

 

The inability to communicate and talk through problems drives me crazy, from what I read Thais just want to go silent and bury their head in the sand. I've got an analytical mind I want to trouble shoot something, get to the bottom of it and then kiss and make up. It's seems that this has been a Bad Bad way to approach things and it just makes things worse.

 

So after almost 2 months now of being kind, offering olive branches , reaching out and still supporting her I've just had a bloody gutful of her stinking attitude and I'm going to go no contact and to make things worse cut her off financially. I know she has no means of supporting herself or paying her rent but after the way I've been treated I am absolutely worn out. 

 

Have any of you guys Tried the Not Contact Rule and also Chopped off the finances ?? I'd be interested to hear your responses. This is either going create World War 4 or it's going to snap this stubborn nasty woman out of her filthy controlling moods that I can no longer accept.

 

Thanks for reading - I wish I had found this forum about 12 months ago before I bought the car ????

 

Tim.

 

 

[sleepy]

Ha i have one like that too
Luckily i am back in OZ
What is the matter with them
Some sort of mental disorder



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[ezzra]

Mate, don't ponder, contemplate or even try to understand the local lasses, the more you try the more you'll get confused, if you can't bear it just walk away, who needs this shit, not any of us i'm sure...

[Puchaiyank]

Have you considered she may be having significant hormone swings associated with her monthly period...

 

If she becomes predictably moody and difficult basically the same period of time each month...she may require some medical intervention.

 

Good Luck!

[OneMoreFarang]

On 5/31/2019 at 7:11 AM, TimShady said:

or it's going to snap this stubborn nasty woman out of her filthy controlling moods that I can no longer accept.

555

[baansgr]

She's too much time on her hands....your paying her "salary" so obviously dosn't work...get shot now

[wreckingcountry]

She’s Thai Female ! All the OP said put in as the definition in the dictionary !


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[TimShady]

On 5/31/2019 at 8:20 AM, OneMoreFarang said:

555

???????? You're right I think this is going to get quite ugly and angry when the money dries up ????

[blackcab]

Before you do this I seriously suggest you have a frank conversation with your employer.

 

She may well turn up at your place of work to create chaos and embarrass you.

 

If your employer and colleagues already know then you will be treated much more favourably.

[jackj]

On 5/31/2019 at 7:11 AM, TimShady said:

For me this is all just total shock as I have never had any of this in any of my relationships in my life - ever!!

This is only the second generation of Thai women who go to work
They have in the genes sitting at home, do b**w jobs and shout for money to Somchai .

 

[jackj]

when they are pregnant they keep their mouth shut so 8-9 months of peace 

and then double trouble ????

[from the home of CC]

i smell bs

[BritManToo]

On 5/31/2019 at 7:11 AM, TimShady said:

then if I raise my voice or defend myself in anyway she tries to covertly record me and film me and it's just an ugly ugly mess.

Just deduct 1,000bht from her pay check for every infringement.

Let her record you saying it.

No need to ever shout.

[DogNo1]

Whatever action you decide to take, be sure to protect yourself.  You probably no idea what lengths a scorned woman can go to.  Abandon the idea of teaching her anything.  Walk away and find someone more compatible.  Read some of the books such as "Patpong Sisters," etc.  The rule of thumb is "You can take the girl out of the bar but...."

[Seth1a2a]

If you're in too deep then you might not get my point.

I've been in and seen the situation enough to realize that to her

this behavior is what it means to be in a relationship . Like some type of recipe ingredient.

Like the courtship of two alley cats who scratch and scream at each other  just before they are about to mate . Or the "Honeymooners" TV show with all the screaming back and forth.   All of that drama is just a way of winding you up for a return. Does not matter what the argument is about. Believe me it's not just you. She would argue with Jesus if she had the opportunity.

The car is an expensive lesson. Do some overtime to replace the cash but don't let it hold you back when you decide to leave.

 

 

 

 

 

 

One day you'll be channel surfing the TV and come across a Thai Soap Opera 

with a word for word argument, a champagne bottle and hands around a throat

and ask yourself where have I seen this before.......

 

 

 

 

[Thongkorn]

On 5/31/2019 at 2:18 AM, Puchaiyank said:

Have you considered she may be having significant hormone swings associated with her monthly period...

 

If she becomes predictably moody and difficult basically the same period of time each month...she may require some medical intervention.

 

Good Luck!

Do you tryst something that bleeds for a week and does not die.

[Isaanbiker]

Op, seriously, as already mentioned, have a chat with your employer. 

 

  She'll do all to get "her salary back" which she seems to deserve.

 

  A friend of mine was married to a similar weird one and she made his life to a living hell.

 

 She came to our school, totally high on Jaba and drunk, yelled F & U all around, very loud and told stories that weren't even true to get some Thai teacher's attention and on her side.

 

  If you can, move somewhere else and make sure that nobody else will know it.

My friend had more incidents, when he quit the relationship she then stabbed him with a huge knife. A real bloody incident.

 

  I was the one who had to bring him to the hospital, then to the cops, while my wife had to look after the first naked daughter who's just a few months old.

 

  When we were at the cops and the guy told them that he'd "fight back" if she'd do that again, they started laughing and pointed at their cells.

 

  That's where you'll be when you do something to her, she's Thai, were their words and their English was brilliant. So, there wasn't a misunderstanding. 
 

  Be warned, everything is possible. 

 

  

  

    

[wreckingcountry]

Psychos all of them


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[DaRoadrunner]

On 5/31/2019 at 7:11 AM, TimShady said:

been in Asia for 18 years, Hong Kong & Vietnam

So how do the girls in Hong Kong & Vietnam compare to the Thai?

 

As for the Thai girl.... hasta la vista babe. I hope the car is registered in your name so you can keep that.

 

Be prepared for her to get nasty when you show her the door.

[wreckingcountry]

Thais are in a world of their own ! Irrational , unbalanced and the best at fakery


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[tingtongtourist]

Theres things you must know NOT to expect from Thai lady.
if you are ok with these things and the good outweighs the bad then its ok.

If you cannot accept, then its best to walk cos otherwise you get a world of hurt that leave you broke and alone.

1. they will never apologise..even when they are clearly wrong and behaving disgracefully (which in their mind actually they are never wrong anyway because its always your fault for making them angry)

2. you will get no thanks..for money, support or anything given..ever.

so dont expect it.

3. know and be prepared to walk away at ANY time..and leaving all the stuff you paid for.
this could happen anytime, even when things seem good.

4. It is you who will always have to make the compromise to make it work..they wont..ever!

True a lot of these things can be said of all females everywhere.

The violent thing as you know, you will get with Thais, very much more so if its Isaan lady.

 

In my age i learned to accept and not be angry, rather feel a bit sorry for them because they are the product of the greedy society they learned from and had to try to survive under. that is really what created the monster.

Over the years they do get better with age,
the big trouble with that is once a farang start buying them cars..giving money, helping family...
how long can you keep that up before you go broke!!??

Its a shame if 95% of time might be good, but the few crazy days now and again can really weigh you down.

 

As for this no contact stuff you talk about..

give up the thought you can change or discipline or teach them tricks like some poodle. its not gonna happen!

(depending on age) if she is no good now, theres a good chance she never will be.

 

Trying to cut off the money is also a bit silly,

that will probably only end up in something of your own bodily pieces getting cut off!

[watcharacters]

On 6/1/2019 at 5:01 PM, from the home of CC said:

i smell bs

 

Pretty big RED FLAG using the name Shady.

 

 

[PatOngo]

Another one that needs to listen to Batman!

 

[Vacuum]

If I understand the OP right, he's not married to this woman and therefore has no obligations to her, non what so ever. Just walk away.

[simon43]

She may well turn up at your place of work to create chaos and embarrass you.

 

My bipolar ex #2 once "gatecrashed" a lecture at Chulalongkorn University where I was studying.

 

The only reason that I wasn't ask to leave the course was probably because of the high fee that I paid to study..... ????

[AlexRRR]

Ummm....Whats with guys thinking they need to rescue some woman? salary...my god....if you were half a man you would have demanded she get a job, the car you provided...more money than sense...

 

My experiance is some are happy to talk about your shit that affects them most are deaf to your concerns of them and this isnt just Thai, The way to deal with a Thai woman thats not capable to negotiate is pretty much tell her its over in a clam rational way....meanwhile you stay in touch and leave your relationship in limbo..not dead yet...Thats assuming you would like to keep it...eventualy some thai women will come around not all but some will, they dont want to be blamed for anything its all hush hush and they may improve they may not untill the next dust up......In the end you maybe just one more lesson for her to learn and a lesson for you to learn is dont fund there life style they got along fine before you arrived they will be doing better after your gone...

[Nico100]

4 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

Theres things you must know NOT to expect from Thai lady.
if you are ok with these things and the good outweighs the bad then its ok.

If you cannot accept, then its best to walk cos otherwise you get a world of hurt that leave you broke and alone.

1. they will never apologise..even when they are clearly wrong and behaving disgracefully (which in their mind actually they are never wrong anyway because its always your fault for making them angry)

2. you will get no thanks..for money, support or anything given..ever.

so dont expect it.

3. know and be prepared to walk away at ANY time..and leaving all the stuff you paid for.
this could happen anytime, even when things seem good.

4. It is you who will always have to make the compromise to make it work..they wont..ever!

True a lot of these things can be said of all females everywhere.

The violent thing as you know, you will get with Thais, very much more so if its Isaan lady.

 

In my age i learned to accept and not be angry, rather feel a bit sorry for them because they are the product of the greedy society they learned from and had to try to survive under. that is really what created the monster.

Over the years they do get better with age,
the big trouble with that is once a farang start buying them cars..giving money, helping family...
how long can you keep that up before you go broke!!??

Its a shame if 95% of time might be good, but the few crazy days now and again can really weigh you down.

 

As for this no contact stuff you talk about..

give up the thought you can change or discipline or teach them tricks like some poodle. its not gonna happen!

(depending on age) if she is no good now, theres a good chance she never will be.

 

Trying to cut off the money is also a bit silly,

that will probably only end up in something of your own bodily pieces getting cut off!

 

 

Theres things you must know NOT to expect from Thai lady.

1. ...

This is not true. My girlfriend do apologise, even if she don't need to, like in case of a misunderstanding due language issues.

2... 

This is not true. I don't support her or send her money, but do I get a geniuine thank you if I buy her a gift.

4....

This is not true. She always insists to talk about our issues and always ask me to tell her about my concerns, so we can clear this out.

 

And yes, she's a Thai lady too.

[NCC1701A]

5 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

1. they will never apologize..even when they are clearly wrong and behaving disgracefully (which in their mind actually they are never wrong anyway because its always your fault for making them angry)

my girlfriend apologizes all the time for little and big things. not that big of a deal.

5 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

2. you will get no thanks..for money, support or anything given..ever.

so dont expect it.

again i get thanks for everything i do. but i hardly give her any money. 

 

5 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

3. know and be prepared to walk away at ANY time..and leaving all the stuff you paid for.
this could happen anytime, even when things seem good.

i have not paid for anything to walk away from.

 

5 hours ago, tingtongtourist said:

4. It is you who will always have to make the compromise to make it work..they wont..ever!

two year anniversary coming up. no arguments so far and nothing to compromise about. 

 

[Rhys]

 say nothing.... walk away... 

 

[lemonjelly]

These first posts from new members all seem to share a writing style, waffle on about a juicy topic relevant to many here and then ask for our opinions....  are they/he being paid per word or being offered a cut on the clicks or..... following orders. Please don’t reply to this either, ta