Estimates Of What Percentage Of Thai Women

[chownah]

I made the statement that I thought that more than half of Thai women drink alcohol and that less than half meditate. Someone indicated that they thought I might be incorrect on this and I always try to remember that my experience here in Thailand is limited so indeed I could be missing the mark on this....so.....I decided to come here thinking that the women who post here have alot more Thai women as friends than I do (probably) and I could benefit by learning what you all had to say. In my statement and in the reply I received we did not discuss how often or how much for either of these activities so feel free to think of these in whatever way makes sense to you.

Thanks,

Chownah

[November Rain]

What are your definitions of both of those acts, Chownah? Frequency? Regularity? By meditation do you mean some quiet time alone to think, meditating at home, or going to a temple or other place to aid spiritual well being? For instance, if someone drinks alcohol only on special occasions & only one glass, do they by your definition drink alcohol? If they go to the temple once or twice a year & make merit, does that qualify as meditation?

[sbk]

Agree with NR here. Its difficult to say without knowing your definitions. So, I'll give you mine.

I know many Thai women of all ages and the only time they will have a drink is a small tipple at a wedding from time to time. Usually then its even only a sip. But, does that constitute "drinking" in your eyes? Not mine, but everyone has different standards. Where I live it is unacceptable for local women to drink regularly. Most local women frown on drunkenness in women and most do not smoke either.

Meditation, well, no idea since that really is done in the privacy of one's home or, if as NR suggests, we could include going to the temple regularly to make merit then I'd have to say over 90%.

But then, I am talking about local women, ie women from the island, born and raised here.

[chownah]

I tried to avoid pinning down amounts and frequencies but I guess I should.

For drinking I guess three drinks in one week constitutes drinking....and for meditating.....I'll say Buddhist meditation as is usually defined in the Pali Canon (Buddhist Scriptures) which is usually (but not always) done while seated and usually on a cushion....someone needs to teach you how to meditate...its not just having a tranquil mind sometime throughout the day.....and I guess the frequency for meditating could be set at three times per week.

November Rain,

so I guess that from these defintions then sitting at home quitely does not count as meditation and neither does going to a temple to aid in spiritual development....drinking only on special occasions (assuming that this means less than three drinks per week...you'd be surprised how many "special occasions" can come up in a week in Thailand when drinking is the issue)...and making merit does not count as meditating.

Sbk,

seems like my reply to November Rain covers your questions too I hope.

Everyone,

In addition do any of you have friends who have meditation rooms in their homes....this means a seperate room for meditating (usually on a cushion on the floor and folding the legs and arms and usually for at least 20 minutes or so at a time and often up to an hour) and having a shrine in a corner or on a wall but not in a seperate room dedicated to meditating does not count.

Chownah

P.S. I know that these defintions are arbitrary but I guess I need to make them if I want the thread to go forward.

Chownah

Edited March 29, 2007 by chownah

[MiG16]

SBK got it quite accurate that most thai women do not drink (those that live in bangkok are totally different to others around the country...with some exception of those in the big cities...and again a much smaller number)

so Id say less than half of thai women drink alcohol.

meditation? hmmmm again Id say majority are not practicing in that artform you describe. I would say a very small percentage. (based on people I know and by looking around people's lifestyles in the countryside)

do I know someone with a meditating room? LOL actually I do.....my uncle has one of those rooms...but Id say hes an exceptional case rather than the norm some do have such rooms...but most that do would have them as 'Hong Phra' (ie where they use for praying and for keeping buddha statues) but a very rare few would have a room specific just for meditation Id say.

now my turn to ask the question....whats with these specifics? what will it tell you? esp about the meditation room?

[solid]

now my turn to ask the question....whats with these specifics? what will it tell you? esp about the meditation room?

I second that.

[duratanium]

I'd like to add my twopennorth here, Chownah.

Hope you ladies do not mind me adding a bit to this topic.

My Thai g/f will drink on various occasions. If I take her to a restaurant she will have a couple of halves of beer or a drink of wine and she believes that is ok.

On rare occasions she will go with me to the pub but, she is not often happy to do so as she does not want to be seen as a bar girl.

She will have a beer when we sit down to have dinner or if her brothers and I are having a session outside the house.

One of her sisters does come out and have the odd drink - maybe once a month or so yet the rest of the females in the family will not touch a drop. So out of about 10 women in the family, one drinks rarely and the g/f drinks maybe 3/4 time a week. Yet I would not class her as a 'drinker' as she refuses to go places such as a pub unless I am with her.

Now then, when I go to various pubs / clubs in Nakhon Sawan, I will see many Thai women drinking but very few are in girl only groups. It is usually couples out together and having a meal, but they do drink.

Same in nightclubs. There are many Thai women drinking but as a % I would have to say it is a small amount of the population.

As for meditation, I have never seen her do this at all.

[qualtrough]

My wife has never had a drop of alcohol, not interested. Meditation? Unless you consider sitting trance-like in front of the boob tube, no.

[lannarebirth]

I've met a few Thai women who drink, but I would say the vast majority never imbibe in alcohol at all. I know many Thai women who meditate but I would say they are in the minorirty of Thai women (from my observations) Oh, and most of the people I know have "Buddha Rooms". Some meditate in them.

Edited March 29, 2007 by lannarebirth

[Tyree D.]

most Thai women I crossed path with were university students. Most of them said they haven't done anything Buddhist related since they got blessed when they were a baby. They drink too much.

Then there are the barladies. It was next to a temple. I saw some go in.

[November Rain]

Most of the Thais I know drink (male and female, although older females much less so than younger ones). I don't know anyone with a meditation room, but I do know women who go to the temple very regularly & have shrines (not sure what the proper word is) in their home. These shrines are not usually in a separate room though, but in the communal living area. I must stress though, that many of the Thais I know, I know through my BF who was a musician & a drinker, so I hardly think they are a representative cross section. Others are overseas educated Thais, whom, I feel may have a more Western attitude than the country women sbk talks of.

[chownah]

now my turn to ask the question....whats with these specifics? what will it tell you? esp about the meditation room?

I had a short discussion with someone whose experience of Thailand was much different from mine and we both sort of thought that our experience was a more correct depiction of Thai society overall so I'm trying to get a clearer picture of Thai society at large by getting more input. The person I was discusssing with implied that since she was a woman she probably had better access to what Thai women thought and I agree with her so I thought that coming to the women's forum would be a good way to get some additional input. As to the specifics....I tried to keep things general and then the first two posts sort of indicated it would be good if I got more specific so I did.

Chownah

Edited March 30, 2007 by chownah

[sbk]

Most of the people I know don't have houses large enough for a separate meditation room, much less separate bedrooms for each family member.

Local people here live pretty simple lives (those outside the tourist industry and to be honest that would include most of my husband's extremely large extended family). About 85% of the local women I know are part of this family so I do know their habits and lifestyles fairly well.

So, in a simple answer to your questions, only one woman I know drinks regularly (and she is not local) and none of them have meditation rooms, so, most likely, do not meditate either.

So, drinking: less than 1% meditation about the same.

[jumnien]

My wife had half a drink on our first date, then hasn't drank in over 4 years at all. In my experience, 50% is way too high for Thai women who drink. Many don't drink at all or don't drink regularly.

The woman in my wife's family tend to go to the wat a few times a year for a few days at a time and wear white and meditate and listen to dharmma talks. I don't know of any who sit on a cushion and meditate several days a week like we are taught in the West at meditation centers. That is one of the ironies of living in Thailand the last 10 years. I miss my regular vipassana meditation groups.

Edited March 30, 2007 by mdeland

[lannarebirth]

chownah,

This doesn't appear to be a scientific sampling. Probably says more ourselves than it does Thai women. Still, I don't think most drink or meditate.

[Boo]

Apart from MIL & her cronies most of the thai women I know drink. These aren't bar girls but women from hubbies home town or old friends from samui (wives of thai men).

The women living on samui (not from samui) enjoyed regular nights out with the girls at thai clubs whilst their hubbies would come & pick them up at closing time. These girls knew how to have fun & liked a bottle of spey to share. They wouldn't get wasted but certainly liked to have a drink. I would say this was at least 2-3 times a month as they all worked long hours in restaurants or their own businesses so either didn't have the energy or money to go out that often. One interesting observation IMO is that they NEVER went out to "farang" places, they felt most comfortable in thai settling where thai men knew the rules of interaction with thai women, This may be why the husbands didn't have a problem either? But I know the idea of going to a "farang" place was not even considered as I suggested a few places myself & was always vetoed.

Of the women in hubbies home town in issan in our age group (30's) & again gf's or wives of thai friends, most drink too, mainly in restaurants or the local music bar (which our friend owns & is the only one in town!) & they are either with their thai bf or in a group of 2-6 thai women out for a night. Agian never getting wasted (but then neither did the blokes) but more as a social thing. I wouldn't class any of these women as drinkers & of the few who didn't drink it was more about not being able to handle the booze rather than a moral issue.

Like NR, my hubbies friends are all fairly bohemian in their attitudes, although they have businesses or government jobs to pay the bills they are all musos & artists & seem to be very liberal so my "group" is not the general rule IMO.

It is really hard to define a whole by a few examples though & beleive that your expereinces will have a lot to do with your lifestyle & where you live. Age will also play a factor IMO & how much contact you have with thai women & in what capacity.

sbk for example, her main group are women family members so there will probably be a certain amount of watching their behaviour for reputation sake where as mine is more a peer group with people probably being more relaxed as amoungst friends there is less pressure to be "proper"? Dunno pure speculation but MHO.

As for meditation rooms, like sbk said, most people don't have the room or even seperate rooms in their house. One or two main communal areas & then shared bedrooms. MIL has the ancestors pictures & shrine in the main sleeping room upstairs, never seen anyone meditate but then they (MIL & cronies) spend a lot of time lying around on the floor or hammocks so who knows, it may be aform of meditation

The younger women I know mostly attend temple often but aren't specifically going to meditate or reflect. More to make merit.

[girlx]

i think girls in cities drink more than girls in smaller areas of thailand. the girls where i am living don't really drink or smoke much, unless they have been "farang-ified"... but the ones that do seem to feel guilty about it.

[khunmarc]

I would say that 100 % of the bar girls drink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

as the majority of the women in Thailand are not bar girls I would think its quite a range from casual to none

no one in my wife familly drinks neither her father or any of her sisters and in laws her brother will have a social drink when he comes to visit but I think its mostly because he thinks I expect that

funny since the only time I have anything to drink in Thailand is when he comes visit!!!!!

as for meditation I think most Thai do not meditate like they teach now in the West but many do the weekly temple thing (mostly older folks and women from what i observed in our village)

My wife and most of her relatives actually do the daily prayer session morning and evening...\not sure if that qualify as meditation of course if you in BKK, pattaya or Chiang mai its another world !!!!!! but i wouldnt know there I never spent much time in neither of them places actually never even been to pataya LOL

[meadish_sweetball]

Most of the Thai women I have met do drink on occasion, although perhaps not three drinks in one week in all cases. Out in my wife's village, some of the women do drink while others don't. The ones who do drink are mostly the ones who are divorced or never married.

Since I do not generally ask people if they meditate I don't know who does and who doesn't, but based on what my wife has told me, very few women she knows actually do meditate (only one of her friends, and none of her relatives). Chanting mantras is fairly common though.

[patatillo]

Well, my experience is quite different.

I am living in Chiang Mai, and where ever i go i see many girls drunk. And i am not talking ofjust a little bit. I think i never have seen more drunk women in my life than in Thailand. I used to live in germany before and u will hardly see any woman drunk.

And guys, i am not going to the farang-places, full of bar-ladies. I am going to places where usually i am the only farang.

Actually i have the sensation that drinking alcohol is something like drinking water here in thailand.

Go to any pub or club and u will always see the mandatory whiskey-bottle.

Please, i hope i am wrong, but that's my experience so far

[boxingbeauty]

Whenever my friend (Thai) and I have had a girly night out (or with the fellas), she has always drank beer. She doesn't like spirits, as she says they make her 'crazy'. She is getting married to an English guy this Xmas, so she has been exposed to Western culture. Other Thai women that I have met on evenings out, I have not seen them drink, apart from the odd beer, while their fellas drink Sangsom. I think it's just excepted that Western women drink, therefore, my fella always gets a bucket of Sangsom/mix for us to share ... he always smiles and says that I'm a 'big drinker'. My friend likes to have a drink, but not get too drunk, which I think is a great example to follow.

[fabianfred]

My Thai wife doesn't drink alcohol.... nor do her parents.... rather the exeption in a village. Most men and women drink in the villages in the North of Thailand.

We just re-built our parents house last year and included a 'Hong Pra' where we have the set of tables for the Buddha statue and flowers, candles, incense etc. and keep all the Grandparents photos there too. Plus all my Dhamma books. Both my MIL, wife and I have studied meditation at a Vipassana centre in Chiangmai, so we all do fairly regular meditation and chanting in our shrine room.