Give Me Money... Give Me More!

[PrinceMongo]

No matter which social class you marry into, the chances are you will be asked outright for money or asked to enter into a "risk free, sure deal". I would like to know what you say or do and how successful you are with your approach.

I wonder why that is. If someone you married to keep asking you for money, maybe you married to a gold digger.

[Kimera]

I was asked to loan some money to my wifes sister only a small amount 4000 baht , wich i did ,

That was the first mistake , i never got it back so i told my wife i will not loan money to any of here family again as they did not pay me back,

That was the second mistake ,

because my wife thought i was unhappy not being payed back ,

so when her sister asked for a loan again my wife explained that i was unhappy about not getting anything back,,

So the sister and my wife did a deal over the last loan and a new one ,

I am now the proud owner of 3 baby buffallo ,,,, yes 3 buffallo ?

What the inghell do i want with 3 buffallo , I want the money

Yes I own normally two Buffalo now down to one Buffalo, Ask the family to buy you Buffalo (before they ask for a loan) then when they ask for loan tell them to sell your Buffalo and when they can pay back buy Buffalo back. NOW my family have Buffalo and of course the Buffalo are never bought or sold so when I visit I ask to see my Buffalo!!!!! Hope you can follow all this or are there to many BUFFALO

I'll trade you your three buffalo for my 2 cows.

[canadiangirl]

It's not charity. It's common courtesy extended to my wife's parents.

My mother in law was legally blind. Never asked for help. I volunteered to pay for her visit to an opthamologist, and paid for her glasses. Something they could not afford (food,clothing, electric, water.... matters more)

She can see very well now.

If I stood by and let her go through life blind, how could I look at myself in the mirror?

Pumpuiman,

you are a good man. You wife and her family are lucky to have you.

[lazeeboy]

It's not charity. It's common courtesy extended to my wife's parents.

My mother in law was legally blind. Never asked for help. I volunteered to pay for her visit to an opthamologist, and paid for her glasses. Something they could not afford (food,clothing, electric, water.... matters more)

She can see very well now.

If I stood by and let her go through life blind, how could I look at myself in the mirror?

Pumpuiman,

you are a good man. You wife and her family are lucky to have you.

if family want money they are told to come to samui and i will give them a job ,well paid .depending on there savvy there many things they can do for me ,clever ,cashier ,stupid ,cleaner ,my wife understands that if they do not want to work for the money they dont get any ,took 2-3 years to get this to work 100% .wow iv'e got a big family

[mmushr00m]

Depending on the amount asked, the wife ask for collateral

[meemiathai]

Go and sit in a go go bar and see how farangs humiliate the thais! (this is just a small part of it!)

Not to mention how they are treated when they are in the hotel room.

Don't the Thais in that case get paid and willingly engage in the "humiliation"?

I'll give you time to digest your own words.

Why would I need to digest my own words? I'm not trying to make anything seem better than it really is, but your example of Thais being humiliated in gogo bars is a bit off the path here. Anyone that works in a gogo bar knows they will be dancing wearing bikinis or even less and there will be Farangs, as well as Thais, looking at them.

Do I really look that stupid, to refer to dancing wearing bikinis and being looked when one works in a gogo bar as humiliation?

Does working in a gogo bar necessarily mean one should have a finger sticking up to one's pussy in front of all the people?

You do know it is not all just that simple like performer and spectators, don't you? Does it take a lot of imagination to figure out how some farangs can treat people badly?(I don't know how to describe it) Or you simply just think all farangs are saints?

Edited August 16, 2007 by meemiathai

[a2396]

i highly disagree.

if they ask just to keep faces in good standing, just give, be generous and give more.

again , what s one of the advantages of marrying a farang. acces to their money!

come on guy you had to know the RULES when you married thai,

Just say no! That's why banks are in existence!

If you have a problem with Thai customs, better not to marry one.

The myth that we're all loaded is one that is happily propagated there.

Let's face it, wherever you're from, it wouldn't be hard to find takers if you set yourself up to give money away.

Throw some at me and I'll take it - and I don't even have a buffalo. But my car needs fixing.

Unfortunately, this myth that we are loaded gets perpetuated by Farangs, who spend like drunken sailors on their ladies & families, to the tune of 50-60,000 + + bht per month & buy houses & cars solely in the ladies name. The "lovelys" here have come to expect such lavish treatment as customary & normal for a Thai/Farang couple. Anything less from you (the Farang) brings out much pi$$ing and moaning about how they (the Thai lady) got the short end, while thier counterpart girlfrinds are living on easy street, thanks to their generous Farang husbands.

The problem is that you a2396 is only capable of understanding things from the farangs point of view. You fail to realize how many farangs have used thai women as well. It is all fair game. You are just not capable enough to see it from a different angle. You claim yourself victim but fail to realize how you have gain by polishing your own ego. If it was that bad, you would have gone for good. What are you doing here may I ask? What made you the prisoner in thailand? I read your post in garro's thread and what I see is your own problem. I don't want to hijack garro's thread. I might give you some comments by starting a new thread later.

I don't use and/or abuse women. I have treated them reasonably & fairly & expect the same. I don't lie and decieve them at every turn, which is a common trait here. Because someone else cheated me, it is not an excuse for me to go and cheat someone else to get even. Such is NOT fair game. I am NOT here only for the women, fortunately Thailand has other things to offer. If you want to take pot shots at me, go ahead. Just be sure you know what you are talking about. The problem here (for me) is that I have not been willing to hand over money to them, with no questions asked & expect nothing in return. Telling a factual account of my experiences here is not ego polisihing. Maybe others might learn how not to fall into the same trap.

[track61]

Trap-shmap. I realize it takes 75% of our blood and 100% of our brains to create an erection, but when it's gone does that mean our brain must remain unusable. What makes a relationship, charity, or decency different in Thailand than anywhere else in the world? NOTHING!!! What makes deciding on who to help, who to ignore, or who to advise different in Thailand? NOTHING!!! If I have money and see someone in my (which includes my wife's parents) family in need, I do what I can. The main reason I married the woman I did is that it was very obvious she had been raised by caring, hard working, decent people. This shows in every thing she does. This trait is not unique to Thailand, it is the same the world over. That old saying about the acorn not falling far from the tree is accurate indeed. So what is the question here? Would anyone that posts some of the crap in this thread go to Amsterdam and marry the girl in the first window on Canal street? I guess my point is, have those guys spent all sense of reason and decency chasing LBG's???? Real life beckons and all it takes to live it fully is participation. And a few bob helps a lot.

[Heng]

Much bitterness on this thread.

[cdnvic]

Much bitterness on this thread.

Most were that way before they ever cleared customs

[Jeff1]

Much bitterness on this thread.

Most were that way before they ever cleared customs

Agree, I see this thread going south rapidly.

[mrtoad]

Much bitterness on this thread.

Most were that way before they ever cleared customs

Agree, I see this thread going south rapidly.

Money discussions always bring out the worst in people

Edited August 16, 2007 by mrtoad

[LongThaimer]

Take your wife's advice. She should be the best, maybe the only, person who can navigate this issue for you.

Agree...you'll need her to be with you regardless of what you choose to do.

In my case, wife is the one who says "NOs" if anyone who approaches us for financial help. Perhaps, she feels obliged to protect our interests from whom she perceived to be as her connections. Nothing wrong with being pragmatic in these situations, I suppose.

However, we still do provide financial support to close members if needed but at our own discretion. This is indeed a very Thai-ness thing to do.

[meemiathai]

i highly disagree.

if they ask just to keep faces in good standing, just give, be generous and give more.

again , what s one of the advantages of marrying a farang. acces to their money!

come on guy you had to know the RULES when you married thai,

Just say no! That's why banks are in existence!

If you have a problem with Thai customs, better not to marry one.

The myth that we're all loaded is one that is happily propagated there.

Let's face it, wherever you're from, it wouldn't be hard to find takers if you set yourself up to give money away.

Throw some at me and I'll take it - and I don't even have a buffalo. But my car needs fixing.

Unfortunately, this myth that we are loaded gets perpetuated by Farangs, who spend like drunken sailors on their ladies & families, to the tune of 50-60,000 + + bht per month & buy houses & cars solely in the ladies name. The "lovelys" here have come to expect such lavish treatment as customary & normal for a Thai/Farang couple. Anything less from you (the Farang) brings out much pi$$ing and moaning about how they (the Thai lady) got the short end, while thier counterpart girlfrinds are living on easy street, thanks to their generous Farang husbands.

The problem is that you a2396 is only capable of understanding things from the farangs point of view. You fail to realize how many farangs have used thai women as well. It is all fair game. You are just not capable enough to see it from a different angle. You claim yourself victim but fail to realize how you have gain by polishing your own ego. If it was that bad, you would have gone for good. What are you doing here may I ask? What made you the prisoner in thailand? I read your post in garro's thread and what I see is your own problem. I don't want to hijack garro's thread. I might give you some comments by starting a new thread later.

I don't use and/or abuse women. I have treated them reasonably & fairly & expect the same. I don't lie and decieve them at every turn, which is a common trait here. Because someone else cheated me, it is not an excuse for me to go and cheat someone else to get even. Such is NOT fair game. I am NOT here only for the women, fortunately Thailand has other things to offer. If you want to take pot shots at me, go ahead. Just be sure you know what you are talking about. The problem here (for me) is that I have not been willing to hand over money to them, with no questions asked & expect nothing in return. Telling a factual account of my experiences here is not ego polisihing. Maybe others might learn how not to fall into the same trap.

You wrote in another thread:

Fortunately, I don't have to and don't expect to deal with this sort of situation. If I am paying the bills 100%, then I decide what happens in my house 100%, with due consultations of course. I really don't have much use for this mixed-up superstition & black magic combined with the so-called religion. You know the old story about the camel who got his nose in the tent. If you don't have the ground rules laid down to start out, it is hard to get more restrictive later-on. The bottom line is now,what kind of balance do you strike to maintain both your wife's happiness & your own.

To some people that is ego. That does not look like love to me. That looks disrespectful.

[Heng]

On a practical level (God forbid), for those who have these kinds of issues with their inlaws... it's sometimes wise to tie up funds overseas or in real estate ...obviously the latter doesn't apply to foreigners, but may apply for households where the local spouse is considered an equal partner in the relationship (God forbid). Or at least agree that both you and your spouse will use that as a unified excuse for not lending out funds.

It's easy for most to say no to frivolous requests, but once in awhile you may get those parents/children are actually dying of some terminal disease/in need of a heart transplant type requests.

Sorry, our funds are all tied up. Oh, I feel so bad about this. Oh. Sorted. I've yet to have to do so with family members, but I have to say no to loan clients all the time. You only feel bad about it the first few times, it's not that difficult to get used to. Just try to look at it like they are trying to keep your children or grandchildren from eating well, going to school/college etc. and it gets easier.

[a2396]

i highly disagree.

if they ask just to keep faces in good standing, just give, be generous and give more.

again , what s one of the advantages of marrying a farang. acces to their money!

come on guy you had to know the RULES when you married thai,

Just say no! That's why banks are in existence!

If you have a problem with Thai customs, better not to marry one.

The myth that we're all loaded is one that is happily propagated there.

Let's face it, wherever you're from, it wouldn't be hard to find takers if you set yourself up to give money away.

Throw some at me and I'll take it - and I don't even have a buffalo. But my car needs fixing.

Unfortunately, this myth that we are loaded gets perpetuated by Farangs, who spend like drunken sailors on their ladies & families, to the tune of 50-60,000 + + bht per month & buy houses & cars solely in the ladies name. The "lovelys" here have come to expect such lavish treatment as customary & normal for a Thai/Farang couple. Anything less from you (the Farang) brings out much pi$$ing and moaning about how they (the Thai lady) got the short end, while thier counterpart girlfrinds are living on easy street, thanks to their generous Farang husbands.

The problem is that you a2396 is only capable of understanding things from the farangs point of view. You fail to realize how many farangs have used thai women as well. It is all fair game. You are just not capable enough to see it from a different angle. You claim yourself victim but fail to realize how you have gain by polishing your own ego. If it was that bad, you would have gone for good. What are you doing here may I ask? What made you the prisoner in thailand? I read your post in garro's thread and what I see is your own problem. I don't want to hijack garro's thread. I might give you some comments by starting a new thread later.

I don't use and/or abuse women. I have treated them reasonably & fairly & expect the same. I don't lie and decieve them at every turn, which is a common trait here. Because someone else cheated me, it is not an excuse for me to go and cheat someone else to get even. Such is NOT fair game. I am NOT here only for the women, fortunately Thailand has other things to offer. If you want to take pot shots at me, go ahead. Just be sure you know what you are talking about. The problem here (for me) is that I have not been willing to hand over money to them, with no questions asked & expect nothing in return. Telling a factual account of my experiences here is not ego polisihing. Maybe others might learn how not to fall into the same trap.

You wrote in another thread:

Fortunately, I don't have to and don't expect to deal with this sort of situation. If I am paying the bills 100%, then I decide what happens in my house 100%, with due consultations of course. I really don't have much use for this mixed-up superstition & black magic combined with the so-called religion. You know the old story about the camel who got his nose in the tent. If you don't have the ground rules laid down to start out, it is hard to get more restrictive later-on. The bottom line is now,what kind of balance do you strike to maintain both your wife's happiness & your own.

To some people that is ego. That does not look like love to me. That looks disrespectful.

Read my post about the lady who ripped off my apartment and you might understand why I have the attitude I have. I can list about 10 or 11 others who have displayed similar lack of respect for me, while at the same time demanding money, including one who had her boyfriend hiding under the bed. When I get respect from someone, they will get it from me.

[WaiWai]

Go and sit in a go go bar and see how farangs humiliate the thais! (this is just a small part of it!)

Not to mention how they are treated when they are in the hotel room.

...

Don't the Thais in that case get paid and willingly engage in the "humiliation"?

The money can never make up for the humiliation.

"Willingly" ? A very relative type of "willingness", when few choices are available and there are children to support. It's not difficult to see that resentment will arise. Reminds me of the reaction in Australia to the US troops on shore leave.

Edited August 16, 2007 by WaiWai

[rainman]

Does working in a gogo bar necessarily mean one should have a finger sticking up to one's pussy in front of all the people?

You do know it is not all just that simple like performer and spectators, don't you? Does it take a lot of imagination to figure out how some farangs can treat people badly?(I don't know how to describe it) Or you simply just think all farangs are saints?

I'm not saying all Farangs are saints and I'm also not saying all Thais are saints. If you go back through a few of my posts in this thread, you'll read that I said there's good and bad people in every culture. It has nothing to do with this ethnicity or that ethnicity.

Gogo bars are a business and whether you like it or not, unfortunately also a big part of Thai culture. People go there to make money, people go there to spend money. In the end it's a business.

From the time I've spent in gogo bars, I've seen that the girls would be touched a lot less if they didn't constantly rub their thighs as close as possible to the faces of the Farangs sitting under the pole and usually it's the 5 girls that instantly jump onto a Farang's lap, not 5 Farangs jumping onto one girl.

Bottom line is, the girls are there to make money. They know what risks their job has and they do it anyways. What are you going to do about it?

I'm in no way defending abuse or humiliation. I'm just getting the facts straight.

[meemiathai]

i highly disagree.

if they ask just to keep faces in good standing, just give, be generous and give more.

again , what s one of the advantages of marrying a farang. acces to their money!

come on guy you had to know the RULES when you married thai,

Just say no! That's why banks are in existence!

If you have a problem with Thai customs, better not to marry one.

The myth that we're all loaded is one that is happily propagated there.

Let's face it, wherever you're from, it wouldn't be hard to find takers if you set yourself up to give money away.

Throw some at me and I'll take it - and I don't even have a buffalo. But my car needs fixing.

Unfortunately, this myth that we are loaded gets perpetuated by Farangs, who spend like drunken sailors on their ladies & families, to the tune of 50-60,000 + + bht per month & buy houses & cars solely in the ladies name. The "lovelys" here have come to expect such lavish treatment as customary & normal for a Thai/Farang couple. Anything less from you (the Farang) brings out much pi$$ing and moaning about how they (the Thai lady) got the short end, while thier counterpart girlfrinds are living on easy street, thanks to their generous Farang husbands.

The problem is that you a2396 is only capable of understanding things from the farangs point of view. You fail to realize how many farangs have used thai women as well. It is all fair game. You are just not capable enough to see it from a different angle. You claim yourself victim but fail to realize how you have gain by polishing your own ego. If it was that bad, you would have gone for good. What are you doing here may I ask? What made you the prisoner in thailand? I read your post in garro's thread and what I see is your own problem. I don't want to hijack garro's thread. I might give you some comments by starting a new thread later.

I don't use and/or abuse women. I have treated them reasonably & fairly & expect the same. I don't lie and decieve them at every turn, which is a common trait here. Because someone else cheated me, it is not an excuse for me to go and cheat someone else to get even. Such is NOT fair game. I am NOT here only for the women, fortunately Thailand has other things to offer. If you want to take pot shots at me, go ahead. Just be sure you know what you are talking about. The problem here (for me) is that I have not been willing to hand over money to them, with no questions asked & expect nothing in return. Telling a factual account of my experiences here is not ego polisihing. Maybe others might learn how not to fall into the same trap.

You wrote in another thread:

Fortunately, I don't have to and don't expect to deal with this sort of situation. If I am paying the bills 100%, then I decide what happens in my house 100%, with due consultations of course. I really don't have much use for this mixed-up superstition & black magic combined with the so-called religion. You know the old story about the camel who got his nose in the tent. If you don't have the ground rules laid down to start out, it is hard to get more restrictive later-on. The bottom line is now,what kind of balance do you strike to maintain both your wife's happiness & your own.

To some people that is ego. That does not look like love to me. That looks disrespectful.

Read my post about the lady who ripped off my apartment and you might understand why I have the attitude I have. I can list about 10 or 11 others who have displayed similar lack of respect for me, while at the same time demanding money, including one who had her boyfriend hiding under the bed. When I get respect from someone, they will get it from me.

So who is going to give out respect first if both parties are waiting? I am not at all trying to unresonably bash you. But it is from what I see from you that makes me think it is you who have a problem. Look at the post I quoted from you, it obviously tells that you do not have respect for others for thinking that because it is your money you can do whatever you like. Who is having a problem here? I don't. I am capable of having a lot of respect from both thai girls and men. And I don't get ripped off.

Yes I did read your post about that lady. And I have also read a lot of stories people being ripped off from scams. How did you meet this lady? And as a 60+ year old person, why are you looking for someone who is only 20+ who obviously most likely will not be physically attracted to you? It is the attitude of you that is a problem. Why look for someone that needs your money? Why not simply try to date women?

[meemiathai]

Go and sit in a go go bar and see how farangs humiliate the thais! (this is just a small part of it!)

Not to mention how they are treated when they are in the hotel room.

...

Don't the Thais in that case get paid and willingly engage in the "humiliation"?

The money can never make up for the humiliation.

"Willingly" ? A very relative type of "willingness", when few choices are available and there are children to support. It's not difficult to see that resentment will arise. Reminds me of the reaction in Australia to the US troops on shore leave.

Glad someone understands.

[WaiWai]

Go and sit in a go go bar and see how farangs humiliate the thais! (this is just a small part of it!)

Not to mention how they are treated when they are in the hotel room.

...

Don't the Thais in that case get paid and willingly engage in the "humiliation"?

The money can never make up for the humiliation.

"Willingly" ? A very relative type of "willingness", when few choices are available and there are children to support. It's not difficult to see that resentment will arise. Reminds me of the reaction in Australia to the US troops on shore leave.

Glad someone understands.

Plenty more understand. They just won't let it get in the way of their "personal pleasures".

It is also not impossible that the humiliation is part of the "pleasure" for some of these characters.

[Maigo6]

It is also not impossible that the humiliation is part of the "pleasure" for some of these characters.

Certainly is for me!

[meemiathai]

I'm in no way defending abuse or humiliation. I'm just getting the facts straight.

Don't the Thais in that case get paid and willingly engage in the "humiliation"?

So that is not defending?

You see, people complain here in a manner like it is always the thais who are the bad ones taking advantage of farangs. So I am just trying to point out the facts that it is not true. Thais get used too if not more!

Now I'M JUST GETTING THE FACTS STRAIGHT.

Edited August 16, 2007 by meemiathai

[Ulysses G.]

"Willingly" ? A very relative type of "willingness", when few choices are available and there are children to support.

I don't like or agree with feeling up the girls in Go-Go bars in public, but many of my buddies really enjoy it and tip the girls to let them do it.

There are plenty of poor countries with few prostitutes. Many Thai womem want to make a lot of money and do little work and feel that men "need" this kind of entertainment - as most Thais do. They accept the "humiliation" as part of the job.

[meemiathai]

I would like to stress that it is not just the feeling up in public. That is just part of the humiliation. Some also like to play psychological games for the purpose to hurt people. Some enjoys superiority and would spend money in order to step people down to as low as possible. Do people understand? I know it is not just farangs. Thais themselves are most probably worse. And the chinese people I have seen here in HK!

For example, like trying to bargain prices to as low as possible for the main purpose to make the person feel how cheap she is.

Anyway, I shall stop. Forum rules.

[rainman]

You see, people complain here in a manner like it is always the thais who are the bad ones taking advantage of farangs. So I am just trying to point out the facts that it is not true. Thais get used too if not more!

Now I'M JUST GETTING THE FACTS STRAIGHT.

I think we got that since your first post. No need to post the same thing all over and over. I never said the Thais are always the bad ones. I think you're attacking the wrong person here. I will once again quote my own replies because either you're obviously overlooking them:

Well there are bad people in every culture, but I don't think you can generalize on all Thais or all Farangs being bad based on this.

I'm not saying all Farangs are saints and I'm also not saying all Thais are saints. If you go back through a few of my posts in this thread, you'll read that I said there's good and bad people in every culture. It has nothing to do with this ethnicity or that ethnicity.

I think you're having a bad day. Go outside and get some fresh air before you have a heart attack over something like this.

The bunny is dead. Stop slapping the bunny.

[DamianMavis]

Ya, stop "humiliating" the bunny.

Damian

Edited August 16, 2007 by DamianMavis

[rainman]

I would like to stress that it is not just the feeling up in public. That is just part of the humiliation. Some also like to play psychological games for the purpose to hurt people. Some enjoys superiority and would spend money in order to step people down to as low as possible. Do people understand? I know it is not just farangs. Thais themselves are most probably worse. And the chinese people I have seen here in HK!

For example, like trying to bargain prices to as low as possible for the main purpose to make the person feel how cheap she is.

And you think this happens only in Thailand? These women as prostitutes, they have sex for money. That's their profession. Prostitutes all over the world get "felt up" and everyone going with a prostitute will try to push the price as low as possible. I have seen prostitution not only in Thailand, but also in 'developed' countries such as the US, Canada, Germany, Netherlands, etc. It's just as bad as Thailand. I have yet to see a man ask a woman "how much do you want?", she answers "$50" and he says "fine, i'll give you $100". Face it, it's prostitution. It's been going on since thousands of years and it's unlikely to change because of our debate here.

[rainman]

Ya, stop "humiliating" the bunny.

[a2396]

i highly disagree.

if they ask just to keep faces in good standing, just give, be generous and give more.

again , what s one of the advantages of marrying a farang. acces to their money!

come on guy you had to know the RULES when you married thai,

Just say no! That's why banks are in existence!

If you have a problem with Thai customs, better not to marry one.

The myth that we're all loaded is one that is happily propagated there.

Let's face it, wherever you're from, it wouldn't be hard to find takers if you set yourself up to give money away.

Throw some at me and I'll take it - and I don't even have a buffalo. But my car needs fixing.

Unfortunately, this myth that we are loaded gets perpetuated by Farangs, who spend like drunken sailors on their ladies & families, to the tune of 50-60,000 + + bht per month & buy houses & cars solely in the ladies name. The "lovelys" here have come to expect such lavish treatment as customary & normal for a Thai/Farang couple. Anything less from you (the Farang) brings out much pi$$ing and moaning about how they (the Thai lady) got the short end, while thier counterpart girlfrinds are living on easy street, thanks to their generous Farang husbands.

The problem is that you a2396 is only capable of understanding things from the farangs point of view. You fail to realize how many farangs have used thai women as well. It is all fair game. You are just not capable enough to see it from a different angle. You claim yourself victim but fail to realize how you have gain by polishing your own ego. If it was that bad, you would have gone for good. What are you doing here may I ask? What made you the prisoner in thailand? I read your post in garro's thread and what I see is your own problem. I don't want to hijack garro's thread. I might give you some comments by starting a new thread later.

I don't use and/or abuse women. I have treated them reasonably & fairly & expect the same. I don't lie and decieve them at every turn, which is a common trait here. Because someone else cheated me, it is not an excuse for me to go and cheat someone else to get even. Such is NOT fair game. I am NOT here only for the women, fortunately Thailand has other things to offer. If you want to take pot shots at me, go ahead. Just be sure you know what you are talking about. The problem here (for me) is that I have not been willing to hand over money to them, with no questions asked & expect nothing in return. Telling a factual account of my experiences here is not ego polisihing. Maybe others might learn how not to fall into the same trap.

You wrote in another thread:

Fortunately, I don't have to and don't expect to deal with this sort of situation. If I am paying the bills 100%, then I decide what happens in my house 100%, with due consultations of course. I really don't have much use for this mixed-up superstition & black magic combined with the so-called religion. You know the old story about the camel who got his nose in the tent. If you don't have the ground rules laid down to start out, it is hard to get more restrictive later-on. The bottom line is now,what kind of balance do you strike to maintain both your wife's happiness & your own.

To some people that is ego. That does not look like love to me. That looks disrespectful.

Read my post about the lady who ripped off my apartment and you might understand why I have the attitude I have. I can list about 10 or 11 others who have displayed similar lack of respect for me, while at the same time demanding money, including one who had her boyfriend hiding under the bed. When I get respect from someone, they will get it from me.

So who is going to give out respect first if both parties are waiting? I am not at all trying to unresonably bash you. But it is from what I see from you that makes me think it is you who have a problem. Look at the post I quoted from you, it obviously tells that you do not have respect for others for thinking that because it is your money you can do whatever you like. Who is having a problem here? I don't. I am capable of having a lot of respect from both thai girls and men. And I don't get ripped off.

Yes I did read your post about that lady. And I have also read a lot of stories people being ripped off from scams. How did you meet this lady? And as a 60+ year old person, why are you looking for someone who is only 20+ who obviously most likely will not be physically attracted to you? It is the attitude of you that is a problem. Why look for someone that needs your money? Why not simply try to date women?

You don't get ripped off, because you probably don't give them much money, or you make sure you are getting a return back. I met this lady through a mutual friend and if she wasn't attracted to me, nobody forced her to spend time with me. As I found out later, she was with me for only money. Money is the operative factor in most Farang matches here, and it is not necessarily an age relaterd situation. Guys her ripped off by 40+ ladies just as fast. I was married to a Malaysian Chinese for 7 years and she was 21 when I met her. I never had a shred of dishonesty or mistrust with her. It's a whole different ballgame in Thailand. A "cottage industry" has grown up in LOS with people "marketing" Thai women for marriage to Farangs, where the main motivation is obviously money. Just "dating" someone here, as I would back home, is not an option. I never did or was expected to give, regular monthly money to girlfriends back home, in addition to handouts expected from her family members. I am the one with the attitude problem?? Get real. I don't know how much understanding you would have about this livinig in Hong Kong.