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How much sleep should an 8 to 9 yr old thai child get per night?


ubonr1971

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My child is in one of the competitive maths programs at a government school. 

 

My wife is equally competitive it seems. My daughter goes to sleep at 9pm and this morning I see she is woken up at 445am to study and eat breakfast. At school 745am. 

 

This is not how I was raised and according to google kids that age should get 10 to 11 hours a night. IMHO 7hr 45min per night is well below the quota

 

What about your kids?

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Bedtime at 9pm seems reasonable, but wake-up time, in your child's case, should be 6am.

 

I have a teenage daughter that has a similar school schedule. I allow her to dictate the time she goes to sleep, but wake-up time is what it is... 6am. She has to be at school at 7:20. [We live 0.5 miles from school; she could walk, but as a courtesy, I drive her.]

 

Next year, she will start at 8:20. She will be in the 11th grade (US). Hot as hell in the summer, and freezing cold in the winter.

 

P.S. She typically walks home, regardless of the weather. We happen to live in a safe area.

 

P.S.S. You did not mention your daughter's age. Mine will be 16. The school system in my area has a tiered schedule for school:

 

High School - 7:20 am

Middle School - 8:20 am

Elementary School - 9:30 am

 

High school kids are let out at 2:15 pm; the other schools are also let out 7 hours after their respective start time.

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This is not just a problem in Thailand either. Worldwide it has become a major issue thanks firstly to Eddison and his lightbulb and now the proliferation of digital devises.

 

In the USA: 'Teens need nine hours of sleep a night for their developing brains. But studies show that close to 70% of teens don’t get that'.

 

Childmind Institute on Sleep

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3 minutes ago, Moonlover said:

This is not just a problem in Thailand either. Worldwide it has become a major issue thanks firstly to Eddison and his lightbulb and now the proliferation of digital devises.

 

In the USA: 'Teens need nine hours of sleep a night for their developing brains. But studies show that close to 70% of teens don’t get that'.

 

Childmind Institute on Sleep

Thanks for your reply. That article relates to teens. My kid is only 8yrs old and my wife will not allow her to have 9 hours sleep

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6 minutes ago, ubonr1971 said:

Thanks for your reply. That article relates to teens. My kid is only 8yrs old and my wife will not allow her to have 9 hours sleep

It's not enough is it. In fact you've answered your own question in your O/P. Sadly the habit starts when they're are much younger.

 

If parents go visiting in the evening, the kids go with them. They do not 'call the babysitter'. There have been many kids in our house over the years yawning away late at night when they should have been home and in bed. Not only are they dog tired, they're bored out their skulls as well.

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This is just the start of it. I have been through this with both of my daughter's. As your daughter gets older there will be extra study after school and at weekends. This is compulsory just to keep up with the other kid's. By the time she is preparing for university it will be less than 6 hours sleep a night. My daughter's are now studying medicine at Thammasat, which is what they wanted. So i guess it worked out for them but there were some tears along the way. Good luck because your wife sounds just like mine was 

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8 hours ago, Myran said:

Sounds absolutely mental, bordering on child abuse. Getting enough sleep is extremely important for a child's development and having to wake up before 5am is absolutely not good.

Normal for many who live in Isaan. 

 

Of course all depending on the kid want ro do it. Some kids need more stimulus than others, some is good at sport, some school, and very few both 

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Kids are individual and evolve...  Whats good this month, is not quite so good 6 months from now. 

 

I pay a lot of attention to my Son's eyes...  of course, his behavior.. (he's 9).

 

He usually falls asleep by 9pm... he's up just before 6am.

I recently noticed him getting tired more towards the end of the school week so I tried to nudge this earlier so he'd be ready to sleep by 8:30pm sleep time (which means in bed reading at least 30 mins before that)... it never worked, he just wasn't tired enough to fall asleep.

We don't wake him up at weekends... he usually gets up around 8 or 9 and has even been as late as 10am !!!....  they catch up somewhere, but its not good to do that every week on 'pattern'. 

 

We're not rigid clock watchers....  so there's usually a 30min variation...  but most importantly his behavior dictates how we interpret his 'need' for sleep and sometimes I have to step in and 'make a change' to say thats it...  this week its earlier to bed because last week he looked a little too tired in the mornings for my liking. 

 

Now its school Holidays he can go to bed when he wants, wake up when he wants. it's up to him to learn 'his' pattern and make 'his choices'.... he's learning when he's 'had enough' of being awake and ready to hit the sack...  That if course is with the caveat, any misbehaviour, its back to a routine....  

 

Come school time again... I'll have evaluated what I think is a good bed-time..  I imagine it'll be similar..... showered and in bed by 8:30pm and free to read for as long as he wants, turn the light out himself when he's had enough and ready to sleep....

 

It also depends, the mental energy demands on children vary as they age and evolve...  the key indicators are behavior... and the eyes are a giveaway for tiredness... so I simply watch those indicators. 

 

 

 

 

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The OP's wife's approach is not typical of most Thai parents, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. I am solidly in the camp that children need their sleep, but I would tread lightly with your wife on this issue for the following reasons:

 

1. Not all kids are the same. Maybe your daughter is an exception to the rule. Does she show signs of sleep deprivation? One test might be to let her sleep in on a weekend and see how long she sleeps. Obviously, the longer she sleeps, the more likely it is that she needs more sleep during the week.

 

2. Is the OP's wife of Chinese descent? That kind of academic competitiveness is unusual among most rural Thais, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. You have to understand the classroom environment in most Thai government schools. There's usually a small nucleus of students at the top of the class that are actually learning what is being taught, followed by a second group that's kind of going through the motions, with spotty attendance and rampant homework copying. Then there's everybody else who is basically not really academically engaged. Your wife probably knows this reality, and is trying to keep your daughter in that top echelon where the real learning is taking place. Kids in this group have a tendency to help one another to learn and are very dialed in academically.

 

3. When you look at the rates of teen pregnancy in Thailand, there's something to be said about your wife's drill sergeant approach. Speaking from personal experience as well as having taught in Thai public schools, I would caution the OP that when these kids hit their teen years things can turn on a dime, and you may find yourself Googling "exorcists in Ubon Ratchathani" when those teenage hormones kick in. I'm just saying that in Thailand's rural environment where it is common for kids to get knocked up and drop out of school early, the more dialed in your daughter is to academic achievement, the more likely she'll be hanging out with success oriented classmates and the less likely she'll fall off the straight and narrow path.

 

4. The final reason I would counsel the OP to tread lightly is because in Thai culture, the mother is the primary child raiser, and a husband, even if they're Western educated, over ruling the mother might not be well received, and might undermine your wife's motivation to see your daughter succeed. I'm not suggesting you should bite your tongue and let your wife do whatever she wants, I'm just saying, I wouldn't get too overbearing and try to start dictating the parenting approach.

 

Hope this helps.

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On 6/30/2023 at 10:20 AM, Gecko123 said:

The OP's wife's approach is not typical of most Thai parents, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. I am solidly in the camp that children need their sleep, but I would tread lightly with your wife on this issue for the following reasons:

 

1. Not all kids are the same. Maybe your daughter is an exception to the rule. Does she show signs of sleep deprivation? One test might be to let her sleep in on a weekend and see how long she sleeps. Obviously, the longer she sleeps, the more likely it is that she needs more sleep during the week.

 

2. Is the OP's wife of Chinese descent? That kind of academic competitiveness is unusual among most rural Thais, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. You have to understand the classroom environment in most Thai government schools. There's usually a small nucleus of students at the top of the class that are actually learning what is being taught, followed by a second group that's kind of going through the motions, with spotty attendance and rampant homework copying. Then there's everybody else who is basically not really academically engaged. Your wife probably knows this reality, and is trying to keep your daughter in that top echelon where the real learning is taking place. Kids in this group have a tendency to help one another to learn and are very dialed in academically.

 

3. When you look at the rates of teen pregnancy in Thailand, there's something to be said about your wife's drill sergeant approach. Speaking from personal experience as well as having taught in Thai public schools, I would caution the OP that when these kids hit their teen years things can turn on a dime, and you may find yourself Googling "exorcists in Ubon Ratchathani" when those teenage hormones kick in. I'm just saying that in Thailand's rural environment where it is common for kids to get knocked up and drop out of school early, the more dialed in your daughter is to academic achievement, the more likely she'll be hanging out with success oriented classmates and the less likely she'll fall off the straight and narrow path.

 

4. The final reason I would counsel the OP to tread lightly is because in Thai culture, the mother is the primary child raiser, and a husband, even if they're Western educated, over ruling the mother might not be well received, and might undermine your wife's motivation to see your daughter succeed. I'm not suggesting you should bite your tongue and let your wife do whatever she wants, I'm just saying, I wouldn't get too overbearing and try to start dictating the parenting approach.

 

Hope this helps.

Thanks for your comment. 

 

I have successfully negotiated 830pm to 530am sleep time. Its 9 hours and although I think its still quite low, its ok. Friends living in western countries with same age kids are getting 10 hours. See what happens. 

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