Female Reproductive Bodyclock

[davejonesbkk]

Hi,

My girlfriend is 32 years old. We want to have children some day but at the moment this is not at all possible, due to the usual reasons of work, time, money etc.

I was wondering how late we can leave it? For me I would like to leave it another 3 years, but obviously it comes down to her health. We discussed this the other night and she says her friend is 38 and now too old to have children I found this surprising and said that there are plenty of women who have kids at that age, she replied by saying Thai women aren't the same. Is this true?

Thanks

Dave

[cathyy]

Well, the good news is that having a baby in the late 30s and early 40s is quite the fashion in the US; the bad news is that you can't count on it happening, even if you spend $15,000 on fertility treatments.

Female fertility begins to decline sharply at about age 25. Fertility is noticeably reduced after age 35.

Moreover, having a first baby at the age of 30 and over is considered to be a higher medical risk than having a second or third child at that age. The recovery is less rapid and less complete. She's more likely to permanently retain some of the pregnancy weight gain.

It's really not so much an issue of her health, as it is an issue of whether you want a decent statistical chance of having kids at all. If you are 5 or more years older than her, the odds are even worse. <rant>People who wait to have children until they can afford them frequently don't ever have them, and I'm glad. If people aren't willing to sacrifice their comfortable lifestyle to raise a family, then perhaps they ought to reconsider whether they are willing to sacrifice the lifestyle freedom of remaining childless. </rant>

[davejonesbkk]

Thanks Cathy,

I am 5 years younger than my gf (Im almost 27).

Im not worried about her having extra weight after birth, my main concerns are her fertility, the health of the child and any risks to her during the pregnancy.

When I talk about not being ready to have a child I mean we both work pretty hard, live in a small apartment and have zero savings. I think it would be pretty irresponsible to have a kid in these conditions, its not cos we're out having fun though and are too lazy to have the responsibility.

[LadyinRed]

...she says her friend is 38 and now too old to have children I found this surprising and said that there are plenty of women who have kids at that age, she replied by saying Thai women aren't the same. Is this true?

A friend of mine gave birth to her first child at the age of 38. Her husband was 47 then.

It's different for everyone.. different genes, health, lifestyle, etc.

As the saying goes... there is never a good time to have a baby.

Save lots of money, take care of your health, enjoy life and see what happens! What will be, will be

[bina]

actually u should check out other sites:

the chance of health problems in the child are statistically much much higher as the woman's age goes up, and its not a straight upward swing:

i can give u an exmple that here in our israeli health plan, which of course promotes babies and not birth control, women from age 35+ are treated by a 'high risk pregnanccy' ob/gyn automatically; women over 45 will not get free fertility treatments of any sort due to the super high risk both to the mother and the offspring.

i checked this all out as i am in the 45 yr range and my new and younger husband had considered the idea of me having a baby... i already have three teenagers from previous father.

there are excellent sites about older women and pregnancy: risks such as twins, toxemia, external ovarian pregnancy, late term miscarriages, downe syndrome ., plus the pro sides of course...

yesterday, i attended the funeral of a year old daughter of my ex's friends; the parents were both 40+ this was to be their fourth child; after one downe syndrome fetus (aborted with medical permission), and two miscarriages, this daughter developed a form of muscular dystrophy (cant remember proper name) and she died in her sleep after a year of in house life support etc.

the medical team later told this friend that the main reason for this disease is womon's age.

u have to weigh the medical aspects which are of course financial aspects (extensive genetic and etc testing, more monitoring, more medical problems during pregnancy,etc.) with the other aspects of your life. it takes time to become pregnant as some of the women here can attest too; there's never really a good time to get pregnant until u do- some of us ride horses until we give birth, others must have bed rest for most of the time when that wasnt what u planned at all;

its all very individual...

bina