Do You Have A Thai Wife Or Girlfriend?

[Thanh-BKK]

Hi.

Just want to say - it works for gays as well. I am a farang who is not too old yet (just 32) and have a thai boyfriend who is two years younger, we have been together (yes even live together) since SEVEN years.

Once we went along with some people to Pathpong - of all places, into one of these sex-show type establishments where the other guys, who visited from Australia, seeked entertainment. In there the mama-san tried to get both me and my BF to have a girl sitting beside us too (and have us pay them overly expensive drinks). So my BF, who is normally rather shy about it to strangers, told her to keep her girls because he and me are a couple. That wasn't a reason for her to stop bothering! She kept talking to him in Thai.

Later when we left that place he told me all about it - she had in lots of details explained to him "how to maximize his profit" from me, how to make sure i give him money and buy him jewelry, and what stories to invent for more of the same, such as the famous "mother needs an operation" story. Unfortunately for that b!tch i know my BF's parents well....

The other way 'round, when i mention to fellow Farangs that i have a thai BOYFRIEND they only hear "boy" - and the questions that are coming in rapid successions are:

- you have only ONE boy?

- is he a ladyboy or a man?

- which bar you got him from? (!!!)

- he is from Isan, right?

- does he pay his own food?

Sorry folks, he's born in Bangkok, original Thai (no Chinese in his ancestry, not that i would mind it), never worked in "the industry" and will never, a real guy who doesn't even act gay (unlike myself) and he has his own job and salary (he even has a couple of credit cards, which he rarely uses - i don't have that!). True he supports his family (his dad just died a few months ago) as most Thais do (and what i value about them!) so yes, i pay most of our things in Bangkok - but he has NEVER asked a single Baht from me, neither did anyone in his family! And we are seven years together and have no problems.

Best regards.....

Thanh

You lucky bastard does this guy have a sister?

Hi

Yes, in fact he does - and she's as cute as him, if i were straight i would fall for her However the problem is that she totally likes Thai guys only - and already has one too (altough that guy is married, she's his "mia noi" only).

Best regards.....

Thanh

[ignoramus]

Oh thank the lord, I've finally got to the end of the topic (so far anyway) and can pass judgment.

Some of you people are thought-provoking and brilliant, others are f**ls. The f**ls are mostly - but not always - the ones who have a spot of bother with the language. Or are just lazy layabouts.

thaifellow - your English is 10,000 times better than my Thai. Ignore the negatives. You are superior.

Some of you have given me much food for thought for thought. Thanks for that.

Some of you merely pretend to have been around. You lack self-insight, and true experience. Pretenders. You should 'listen more, talk less'.

"LUG" -- this is short for 'lesbian until graduation'. This acronym describes not a few university students in Sydney, at least, if not in Oz as a whole, who finds it useful to 'be nice' to the 'right people', for just the right amount of time, dearie.

Then we have the ever-so-nice ladies who moonlight as 'escorts' - such a lovely word. They make ever-so-nice-nose-in-the-air ladies of the 'better' suburbs, after graduating. Yeah, right. Guess what they do.

I 'met' (read nothing into that) a very sweet girl in a Patpong bar in '91 who was deaf. My strongest instinct was to do 'something' for her. Nix, zilch, nil else, me old mateys. My priorities sucked I guess.

The most genuinely liberated female I've ever met was one in Si Racha, in a group of about 6 Thai guys, + myself.

Aussie prostitutes are generally druggies, have poor skin and zero self-respect, and of course thay don't really know what's happening. And I'm going back to the 50's me old mateys. Those of you who pontificate about Thai females are 100% clueless, and I imagine, will remain clueless until you drop off this mortal coil. Mind you, anyone who pontificates about anything is a clueless f**l. Except me.

We need a moron-detecting s/w program. Don't forget folks, English ain't SMS text, it's a language.

[ignoramus]

Yeah yeah, I saw the mistakes, thanks all the same...mere typo's.

By the waylad, if you are/were tempted to point the mistakes out....then you a the f**l I was a'talking about!!! There's a mirror over there, or maybe 3-4, have a close look.

[blizzard]

nice post iggie

wotevr u trying to say!

[JimmyCA]

6 Pages, 134 replies and 2625 views in 2 days. I take it this is a subject of many peoples mind. . Agreement on op statement to just laugh it off. Most have been said already. Western people are jealous of us western people living here, in all aspects, and the ones that are not jealous is the ones that dont make the idiotic statements. People (like my mom for instans) who only say that i made good choises and seem to have a good life and that she also want to move here eventually and so on. Genuine people. Thats what counts. The other <deleted> can keep their miserable lives for themselves and if it make them less miserable to trow a little shit our way, hmmm, why not, lets agree, hang up, and laugh it off here in paradise.

Some good points, however you will not find genuine people in Thailand. If that's what counts back home to your mother you must go.

[blizzard]

enlighten us wot yr momma finds attractive about thailand

[farang prince]

enlighten us wot yr momma finds attractive about thailand

Almost 1,000 posts of total drivel. Congratulations Blizzard. You are a human speed bump.

[blizzard]

wow, u count how many post i have. im impressed.

u want drivel check out post 161.

[farang prince]

wow, u count how many post i have. im impressed.

u want drivel check out post 161.

Yep. I'll add it to the list of posts that deserve a messy ending at the bottom of a bird cage.

[Pepe']

In my experience, people in the states (#1) don't know anything about Thailand and don't seem to care either. Can't see any benefit in telling them much. I just spend the winters and July in Thailand so I go to Thailand mainly for the weather . GF of 5 years is a tad over half my age, maybe time to find a younger lass.

---------------------

Sounds a little old for you Jimmy.

My new GF here is 15 years younger and that's what my buddy just told me...

[BEENTHEREDONETHAT]

Back in 1975 I married a very beautiful lady 10 years younger than me. I was in my early 40's at the time. Even then I got these snide remarks like "can I dance with your daughter". So I don't think it has as much to do with race as it does jealousy on the part of the people making the comments. I might add that we are still on our honeymoon after 32 years. Living in Thailand is just a continuation of a great life. So if people make these remarks to you I think they are just envious and it is nothing for you to get pissed about.

[JimmyCA]

Back in 1975 I married a very beautiful lady 10 years younger than me. I was in my early 40's at the time. Even then I got these snide remarks like "can I dance with your daughter". So I don't think it has as much to do with race as it does jealousy on the part of the people making the comments. I might add that we are still on our honeymoon after 32 years. Living in Thailand is just a continuation of a great life. So if people make these remarks to you I think they are just envious and it is nothing for you to get pissed about.

Hard to imagine a man in early 40's taking a ribbing for a GF in early 30's. Anything over 30 is considered old. Heck early 30's is would be an old bird for you even now.

[mattias33]

6 Pages, 134 replies and 2625 views in 2 days. I take it this is a subject of many peoples mind. . Agreement on op statement to just laugh it off. Most have been said already. Western people are jealous of us western people living here, in all aspects, and the ones that are not jealous is the ones that dont make the idiotic statements. People (like my mom for instans) who only say that i made good choises and seem to have a good life and that she also want to move here eventually and so on. Genuine people. Thats what counts. The other <deleted> can keep their miserable lives for themselves and if it make them less miserable to trow a little shit our way, hmmm, why not, lets agree, hang up, and laugh it off here in paradise.

Some good points, however you will not find genuine people in Thailand. If that's what counts back home to your mother you must go.

Sorry to tell you that the group of people around you might not be representing either general Thais NOR expats living in Thailand. Yes i do find genuine people in Thailand. Alot of them. In fact all the people i hang out with on general basis (Thais and foreigners) i consider VERY genuine. Feel a bit sorry for you though, when i read your statement. Seems like a sad situation, hope you get by fine anyway.

Edited November 11, 2007 by mattias33

[YangYaiEric]

That is what many folk back home may be thinking of us guys out here.

I have been in LOS for a few years. I make the occasional phone call back to 'the folks'. I am used to gentle inuendo.... harmless jokes based on the usual stereotypes regarding Thai chicks. Harmless. I go with it and have a laugh.

However I have just finished a phone call with a certain fammily member who i have never realy got with too great. Enquiring about my GF, who i have been with for almost 3 years, the line of questioning was more intense than the usual harmless banter;

'Did you like, pay for her?'

'Was she from a bar?'

'How young is she?'

'Does she speak English, or are you not bothered about that as long as she holds fort in the sacks?'

'I guess she does all your ironing, cooking, cleaning... is she like a maid?'

Gut instinct was to kick off to high hel_l and shut this <deleted> up. I found myself at a loss and just for the laugh of it, I answerd yes to every question that was asked. To my suprise, there conclusion was;

'Ahhh.... thats ok, good on you! Nothing wrong with that, and thats what we figured'

<deleted>.

My GF is one year older than me, so thats that particular stereotype nailed. i didnt meet her in a bar. She had her own business. She has her own money. And i am not a huge pile of lard with a wig. Im an average looking bloke.

But if my GF was 20 years younger than me, straight out of Pussy Galore in Patong... who cares?

I speak to westerners every day on the phone through my job. Occasionaly i get asked 'you live in Thailand.... ahh... you have a girly then?' I usualy just laugh it off.

Now im thinking....

Do those dickheads back home assume i am here just to land myself an 18 year old munchkin with pigtails, who can project ping pong balls into the gulf of Thailand quicker than you can say 'how much for a fortnight'?

fark'em anyway. Couldnt give a toss what there perceptions are. Im just intrigued.... I always thought the stereotype was a cliche?

Or do guys back home realy think this way?

Im not bothered. Couldnt give a bugger. Just asking the question....

I'm a Green-Skinned Alien from the planet Zog, married to my Thai wife for over 20 years. She knew what she was getting when we married, and like-wise, I did too. Now then, we live out in the provinces where there aren't too many Green-Skinned Aliens, so where-ever we go together, we get all sorts of funny looks and comments made about us. But, WE DONT CARE !! We love each other, and we have 5 wonderfull Green-Skinned/Thai children together !!!

Now then, on a more SERIOUS note, who gives a Rats' Arse about what other people say about or Thai wife/GF? As long as we ourselves are happy in our relationship with them. I think the OP may have other issues, otherwise why make such a post in the first place?

[blizzard]

perhaps op is one of thos cupples where man is 300 pounder neanderthal type while gurl is sweet younish 40 kilo so often seen walking the mean streets of bk k.

isnt the whle thai face ting a manifestation of being concerned wot others tink.

Edited November 11, 2007 by blizzard

[JimmyCA]

6 Pages, 134 replies and 2625 views in 2 days. I take it this is a subject of many peoples mind. . Agreement on op statement to just laugh it off. Most have been said already. Western people are jealous of us western people living here, in all aspects, and the ones that are not jealous is the ones that dont make the idiotic statements. People (like my mom for instans) who only say that i made good choises and seem to have a good life and that she also want to move here eventually and so on. Genuine people. Thats what counts. The other <deleted> can keep their miserable lives for themselves and if it make them less miserable to trow a little shit our way, hmmm, why not, lets agree, hang up, and laugh it off here in paradise.

Some good points, however you will not find genuine people in Thailand. If that's what counts back home to your mother you must go.

Sorry to tell you that the group of people around you might not be representing either general Thais NOR expats living in Thailand. Yes i do find genuine people in Thailand. Alot of them. In fact all the people i hang out with on general basis (Thais and foreigners) i consider VERY genuine. Feel a bit sorry for you though, when i read your statement. Seems like a sad situation, hope you get by fine anyway.

Yes, many newbies find thais genuine. The longer you stay in thailand the more likely you will see thru the illusion, hopefully before you loose all your money.

[TheDon]

6 Pages, 134 replies and 2625 views in 2 days. I take it this is a subject of many peoples mind. . Agreement on op statement to just laugh it off. Most have been said already. Western people are jealous of us western people living here, in all aspects, and the ones that are not jealous is the ones that dont make the idiotic statements. People (like my mom for instans) who only say that i made good choises and seem to have a good life and that she also want to move here eventually and so on. Genuine people. Thats what counts. The other <deleted> can keep their miserable lives for themselves and if it make them less miserable to trow a little shit our way, hmmm, why not, lets agree, hang up, and laugh it off here in paradise.

Some good points, however you will not find genuine people in Thailand. If that's what counts back home to your mother you must go.

Sorry to tell you that the group of people around you might not be representing either general Thais NOR expats living in Thailand. Yes i do find genuine people in Thailand. Alot of them. In fact all the people i hang out with on general basis (Thais and foreigners) i consider VERY genuine. Feel a bit sorry for you though, when i read your statement. Seems like a sad situation, hope you get by fine anyway.

Yes, many newbies find thais genuine. The longer you stay in thailand the more likely you will see thru the illusion, hopefully before you loose all your money.

Sounds like someone has had some bad experiences.

[qwertz]

It all comes down to the supply and demand situation in LOS.

An unspoken trade agreement was concluded there long ago between farangs looking for women and women looking for men.

Any man who falls in love with a prostitute there is - or should be - aware of the pitfalls: the age difference, disapproval from various quarters, language barrier, assorted baggage.

Was the OP questioning his own motives or just thinking aloud?

If I consort with Thai women, I pay - as you all do.

Since I'm 65, I'm not going to hunt for a woman over 60 just so nobody disapproves when there are much younger women just as eager to take my money.

As for how I feel about snide comments - simple answer - I don't feel - and I could care less about their hangups.

[mattias33]

6 Pages, 134 replies and 2625 views in 2 days. I take it this is a subject of many peoples mind. . Agreement on op statement to just laugh it off. Most have been said already. Western people are jealous of us western people living here, in all aspects, and the ones that are not jealous is the ones that dont make the idiotic statements. People (like my mom for instans) who only say that i made good choises and seem to have a good life and that she also want to move here eventually and so on. Genuine people. Thats what counts. The other <deleted> can keep their miserable lives for themselves and if it make them less miserable to trow a little shit our way, hmmm, why not, lets agree, hang up, and laugh it off here in paradise.

Some good points, however you will not find genuine people in Thailand. If that's what counts back home to your mother you must go.

Sorry to tell you that the group of people around you might not be representing either general Thais NOR expats living in Thailand. Yes i do find genuine people in Thailand. Alot of them. In fact all the people i hang out with on general basis (Thais and foreigners) i consider VERY genuine. Feel a bit sorry for you though, when i read your statement. Seems like a sad situation, hope you get by fine anyway.

Yes, many newbies find thais genuine. The longer you stay in thailand the more likely you will see thru the illusion, hopefully before you loose all your money.

Sounds like someone has had some bad experiences.

Indeed it does. Like i said, Jimmy, feel sorry for you being cheated and not being able to meet genuine people. Just dont make stupid statements please. Thailand (population of approx 60 milj. people) dont have ANYONE genuine? EVERYBODY is making "illusion" to cheat you for money? I cant help but wonder whatever happened to a person that would make such a statement? You must have been cheated bigtime. Sad for you, but like i said, you had bad luck met the wrong people. Dont judge the whole population because you met some a**holes. Thais in general are good people. Thats my oppinion.

[Kf6vci]

Well, I admire your patience. But all that is non of their business - family, or not.

One friend sent me an article about Thai girls ripping off their farang husbands. The usual: he pays for a house, she kicks him out asap. But I have tried to argue that although she is 11 years my junior, she has a career, owns a house worth a 6-digit amoutn in Euros free and clear etc.

When some people hear I'm flying to Bangkok, they are quick to regard me as a sex tourist or John. Little they know about how traditional many families are: I know a girl (a lawyer with several master degrees) who would not sleep with a guy for 10 million Baht. She still lives at home, commuting a long way to Muang, Nonthaburi from work in Bangkok.

My gf read yesterday an article about a Thai wife living in Oslo. She is facing prejudice as well and the authorities question the marriage might be some scam. In that article, it was said that mostly Germans have their wives sign marriage documents in a foreign language, sneaking in prenups and even divorce papers at the same time. I was shocked and ashamed to hear that - so the scheming and ripping off goes both ways. Little we hear about how mean many Thais are treated by farang!

In Thai society, our relationship is accepted once they all believe it is genuine love. Some of her friends were concerned at first. Who can blame them? As there are blokes out there like that Aussie who wanted to meet a girl and demanded she shave her - you know. they haven't even met yet ( ** She keeps asking me whether she can have this dish or that dish and there are many acts of kindness like her cutting my nails as I was doing such a bad job myself. And she doesn't like me to wash her clothes so I'll just wash my own.

Life is too short to worry about what others might be thinking!

[JimmyCA]

Everyone wants to be a cop. It is the worst of human traits.

If you do not like the thread don't read it.

[blizzard]

sir ive been warned for not telling mods how to run this place. did u get a warning also mr yin and yang?

[thomo]

^^ better than everyone, on a high high horse farangs who tell people what to do.

Just what LoS needs more of. Welcome.

[saraburioz]

Or do guys back home realy think this way?

Some of my mates thought that way until they met her. They are not idiots, they can tell by looking at her. It's pretty bloody ovbvious if your woman is or was a hooker to other people. Who cares?

[BEENTHEREDONETHAT]

If you don't read it how do you know if you like it or not?

[Huangy]

Sidestepping the beer bar brawl sprawling into the street.

Gawd I used to put up with the knowing nudge nudge looks when I was living in Taiwan with the Taiwanese ex. You think Australians would know the difference between Thailand and Taiwan, but no. Can't say now I'm with a Thai that there's any difference.

Back in the world there seems to be some kind of automatic assumption that when a man is going out with an Asian woman it is always somehow exploitative. That's up there with that other painful myth that all Asian chicks are passive, demure and naturally acquiesce to their husband's every whim.

HG

[Lilawadee]

They aren't???

Well that's it then, I'm rethinking my plans of dating Thai women. I shall stay as single as humanly possible in this country.

[Huangy]

[Kerryd]

You gotta love the double standards.

If Anna Nicole Smith marries a (rich) guy old enough to be her grandfather, she's a gold-digger (to put it politely).

If a Westerner marries a Thai girl (of almost any age that's slightly younger than himself), he's a pervert.

I had a Thai g/f in 98, when I was 37. I originally thought she was around 23-24, and was surprised to learn she was 32. If I had taken her back to Canada, most people would have probably assumed she was in her early 20's as well. Not that I would (or do) care what they think.

I'd be more concerned with having to deal with the losers back home that would be trying to hit on my g/f (because their "lets smoke dope and drink until we pass out puking in the ditch" attitudes don't seem to attract many women).

Many people ask me "Why Thailand" when I tell them where I live. I blame my father. He once told me he wanted to retire some place where the only time he saw snow was on a postcard, and the only time he saw ice was when he was stirring his drink. I decided that sounded pretty good to me to. When I am home, I live pretty much the same lifestyle I would in any other place. The difference is, if I go to a local establishment for a quiet drink, I can have as much, or as little, companionship as I want, with little effort (and significantly cheaper, and I'm not talking about bar-fines and other "expenses").

Years ago I looked at many other countries around the world. Places I could live, that were warm, cheap, had decent healthcare and transportation systems, not too unstable politically, etc. Thailand came out on top. Great weather, excellent food, good exchange rates, friendly people and so on. This is what I tell people that ask me why I live there.

Never had anyone accuse me of living there because of the reputation of the place (or it's citizens). I did show some of my co-workers some pictures I took on the Bike Week trip I took in December. When they saw the pics of me and my latest squeeze sitting on a Harely, there were no snide comments on the obvious age difference. No questions about where she worked, or what she did for a living.

The only comment of a personal nature was "Wow, she is beautifull", and that came from one of the Bosnian girls working here.

(One point I should mention though. A Thai buddy of mine told me that if I wanted to get married, he'd help find a "good" girl for me to settle down with. So perhaps, even among some Thais, girls that work in bars are not considered "good").

[Lilawadee]

(One point I should mention though. A Thai buddy of mine told me that if I wanted to get married, he'd help find a 'good' girl for me to settle down with. So perhaps, even among some Thais, girls that work in bars are not considered 'good').

Yes, though that's usually more to do with her (regional) background, education, and social status/class than with her vocation. 'Good' often means 'good family', urban background, yadda yadda and so forth.