English Teachers Only Get Stuck With Bar Girls?

[Nemesis]

I postulate that it is entirely possible an upper class girl might date a young, chiselled ,drop-dead handsome, brad pitt esque, super hunk, english teacher

as opposed to some filthy, old, fat, smelly, bald slob with a few more G Notes in his wallet ???

Rather interesting how a Western girl brought up the chiselled looking brad pitt type man as opposed to the sensitive, caring family type man that most women actually prefer to settle down with.

I thought one of the good things about living in Thailand was that old, fat, bald slobs with a few G notes in his pocket could attract a woman, albeit low class?

[sriracha john]

Hopefully now after 10 pages of this, we can mercifully end it with the conclusion that Nemesis is certainly low brow, if not also low class, for all of his insecurity, inferiority-complex issues. Next?

[Nemesis]

Wow, another psychoanalyst among us low paid English teacher types. You are in the wrong profession if you can make such a diagnosis after only reading less than 7 pages of a thread in cyber space. And you didn't even need to meet me face to face. Move over Jung and Pavlov.

Is our 50 minutes up? Can I get off the cyber-couch now?

[sriracha john]

Wow, another psychoanalyst among us low paid English teacher types. You are in the wrong profession if you can make such a diagnosis after only reading less than 7 pages of a thread in cyber space. And you didn't even need to meet me face to face. Move over Jung and Pavlov.

Is our 50 minutes up? Can I get off the cyber-couch now?

Yes, you may... and may I suggest you head for the airport as your next stop. Your lack of understanding Thailand is amazing, eg. english teachers don't make enough to support a life-style, teachers don't get respect, etc. Rather than go on with explaining the facts regarding these erroneous beliefs, I'll stop and suggest you re-read the input on the previous 10 pages.

[Horizontalbiker]

I haven't read all the posts on this thread so forgive me if I repeat what's already been said.

I've been teaching in Thailand for four years now and married to a Thai for three. I live in a nice house, have a motorcycle, soon upgrading to a car. And in general life has been pretty good to me out here.

Do "teachers" in Thailand only end up with bar girls. No I married a teacher!!!

Maybe your overlooking the obvious here, you work in an institution rife with hard working, educated women. Why are you still goin' down bars? Have you even thought of asking one of your co. workers out?

[Nemesis]

I've been teaching in Thailand for four years now and married to a Thai for three. I live in a nice house, have a motorcycle, soon upgrading to a car. And in general life has been pretty good to me out here.

If having a Suzuki motorycyle and a rented house is enough for you, then you've done well. Good for you. We're talking generalities here. There will be exceptions of course, which the more intelligent among us recognize.

However, there are a few, like john boy here, who thinks because someone brings up a topic for discussion, which was stated in the form of a question, that the proposer of the question must be "low brow, if not also low class, for all of his insecurity, inferiority-complex issues."

I just may be completely different from how you've got me all figured out to be. e.g.

I don't even molest little boys anymore and stop beating my wife when we divorced 10 years ago now.

Lighten up there john boy, its only a discussion.

[Horizontalbiker]

I've been teaching in Thailand for four years now and married to a Thai for three. I live in a nice house, have a motorcycle, soon upgrading to a car. And in general life has been pretty good to me out here.

If having a Suzuki motorycyle and a rented house is enough for you, then you've done well. Good for you. We're talking generalities here. There will be exceptions of course, which the more intelligent among us recognize.

The bikes a Honda, and yes, the house we live in is rented, the love and understanding of a good woman are however irriplacable.

But back to the question, do teachers in LOS only end up with bar girls?

Well for one, you only get what your looking for, if your looking for women in bars, hey guess what. If you want to meet nice Thai women the bar ain't the place to go. If you want to meet someone who's financially independent then you need to get them to like you, poor or not, teacher or not if your intelligent and sincere women will be interested. I think the reason that "teachers" end up being ignored by upwardly mobile Thai women is the fact that these women know that the guys probably not going to be around for long. Most tend to only stay for a year or so then either move on or go home.

[Foggy Bottom]

I notice in all this that no-one has brought up the question of sibling or parental pressures on the girls involved......

In one case (years ago) the girl was literally sold out from under me, and sent off to marry a retiree in Europe because he paid the family a handsome sum for her - she was 34 at the time and I was six years older than her. I also owned a business in Thailand and was not teaching,

More recently, dating a mid to senior level bank exec, her family ordered her to dump me because I was a university teacher = low salaried compared to all of them

[meemiathai]

I notice in all this that no-one has brought up the question of sibling or parental pressures on the girls involved......

In one case (years ago) the girl was literally sold out from under me, and sent off to marry a retiree in Europe because he paid the family a handsome sum for her - she was 34 at the time and I was six years older than her. I also owned a business in Thailand and was not teaching,

More recently, dating a mid to senior level bank exec, her family ordered her to dump me because I was a university teacher = low salaried compared to all of them

I'd only choose to be with the girl who is old enough to decide whom she wants.

[Heng]

That rules out a lot (not all of course) of 'under 50' year old's. Nice.

[maitembot]

I notice in all this that no-one has brought up the question of sibling or parental pressures on the girls involved......

In one case (years ago) the girl was literally sold out from under me, and sent off to marry a retiree in Europe because he paid the family a handsome sum for her - she was 34 at the time and I was six years older than her.  I also owned a business in Thailand and was not teaching,

More recently, dating a mid to senior level bank exec, her family ordered her to dump me because I was a university teacher = low salaried compared to all of them

Hmmm...I still get well-off moms and daughters coming around because I WAS a university teacher

[PeaceBlondie]

Well, what can one add to a thread that's already about ten pages long? But that never kept me from adding a few words or more.

Nemesis, as usual, you're making some sweeping generalizations, which are clouded by your limited experience in Thailand. But then, so do I, at times.

25,000 per month is beginning salary for any English speaker straight off the plane. If they have skills, a university degree, decent appearance, brains, and the ability to get ahead in an organization like a school, they'll be making over 35,000 within two years (more in Bangkok), especially if they can wangle private lessons and keep the money coming in.

Especially if he's wiling to seriously get involved with a woman over 35, a well-behaved ajarn at a Thai govt. school will find himself surrounded by fairly good looking, well-dressed female uni graduates, many of them from upper middle-class families, who are divorced and independent, and not as fixed in their modern ways as a Western divorcee. Most of these hard-working, well educated Thai women have their own late model sedan, a reasonable sized home, and a salary about double the middle class plodders who will never get a pension. Nice pickings, if you're looking for a tight va**na.

Likewise, if he keeps out of the bars and the whore houses, a gay teacher can find a respectable, employed, hard-working non-barboy long-term lover.

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

[sriracha john]

Excellent post and with that hopefully Nemesis CAN comprehend and won't require another 10 pages of examples and explanations.

[andreasbkk]

Just asked my Thai fiancee, why middle/upper TGs dont like Eng Teachers, she said she dont like Eng Teachers as well. She is a middle/upper TG...

I was a bit surprised - but she simply said how come they are not going for something better...

Regards, Andrew

[qwertyuiop]

"On nights out, back when I was single, I'd hit places like Ratchada Soi 4, RCA, Mystique, etc.... A lot of times, I'd be the only Westerner in the bar, but I never felt out of place."

Pudgy, you were made.  I quoted the post from the other string.  You may have gone back and changed it now, but why try to deny it when I have your quote in the other post?

We all know you're a bit on the "creative side" anyway Pudgy...

Take care,

WISteve

Steve,

I think that you are correct in the assumption that the reference to the wife was edited. I myself read the very same thing in the other thread but of course it is not there now.

Personally I do not see what the big deal is as for me with many farangs the terms wife and GF are interchangeable.

However editing the text and then suggesting that it was never said would certainly have an impact on how seriously I would take any other statements that the poster would throw out

[Storekeeper]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

[bkk barney]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

Dysfunctional men have also been known to pay for bar boys aswell pb

[mbkudu]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

So are you saying functional men #### them and don't pay them? Cheap bastards!

[Nemesis]

I notice in all this that no-one has brought up the question of sibling or parental pressures on the girls involved......

In one case (years ago) the girl was literally sold out from under me, and sent off to marry a retiree in Europe because he paid the family a handsome sum for her

More recently, dating a mid to senior level bank exec, her family ordered her to dump me because I was a university teacher = low salaried compared to all of them

More common than we might think. These are two examples we know about. The Thai upper class don't want their daughters marrying 'down' and sorry to put it to you waied ben Kruus but University teachers don't fill the bill, much less grade school teachers.

Whether you ride a Suzuki or Honda motorcycle (gotcha!)

Get over it.

[Storekeeper]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

So are you saying functional men #### them and don't pay them? Cheap bastards!

I'm saying I wouldn't have expected him to make this irrational comment about BG's. PB never slanders anybody so this was an unexpected comment. Is that better there Turd Blossom ?

[Storekeeper]

I notice in all this that no-one has brought up the question of sibling or parental pressures on the girls involved......

In one case (years ago) the girl was literally sold out from under me, and sent off to marry a retiree in Europe because he paid the family a handsome sum for her

More recently, dating a mid to senior level bank exec, her family ordered her to dump me because I was a university teacher = low salaried compared to all of them

More common than we might think. These are two examples we know about. The Thai upper class don't want their daughters marrying 'down' and sorry to put it to you waied ben Kruus but University teachers don't fill the bill, much less grade school teachers.

Whether you ride a Suzuki or Honda motorcycle (gotcha!)

Get over it.

How is this different than any other country ? It doesn't matter if you're in England, Japan, Australia, USA...nobody wants their daughter to marry "down". Anybody who is naive enough or believes in their ego-maniac ultruistic persona to believe otherwise...can go blow smoke up another's bung hole.

[Nemesis]

The point I trying to make is I think English teachers are being exploited by the upper class in Thai society to educate their children, while at the same time, for the most part, they don't want lower class farang involved with their families.

Too many English teachers have an elevated view of their perceived status within Thai society. Time for a reality check folks.

I now know what it is like being part of the exploited class. Never felt that way in the US. Always thought there was a way up and out. There is still a way up and out of low class work for farang in Thailand, (teaching English) but difficult due to the many barriers put in our way. Some due to discrimination, some due to xenophophia, some to jealousy, and the fact that an English teacher can never save enough of his/her salary to acquire capital with which to start a business, once an English teacher, almost always an English teacher and the resulting Honda and rented house and living on rice an noodles.

The US has no-fault divorce. Thailand has no-fault everything. If a Thai and a farang have a dispute, farang lose. Hard to do business in that climate.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

According to some threads on Thaivisa there seems to be a few dysfunctional women around that buy 'emselves a spot of nocturnal delights with Thai guys

[Coffee Dude]

Nemesis Posted on Sun 2004-09-12, 11:09:59

The point I trying to make is I think English teachers are being exploited by the upper class in Thai society to educate their children, while at the same time, for the most part, they don't want lower class farang involved with their families.

People have been taking advantage of others thoughout recorded history and almost certainly before then too. I think the old saying is 'No matter how advanced a culture may become, someone has to take out the garbage'.

Must be an exciting new sensation to be on that side of the 'taking advantage situation' huh Nem?

Coffee!!!

[PeaceBlondie]

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

I've come to expect better from you than this.

Sorry to have misstated my point. I apologize. Now may I restate it?

Some functional men pay for rental sex because it's convenient, they can afford it, it's not too risky, their morals don't interfere too much, etc. But, in the long term if they want it and try for it, functional men are usually able to eventually find a long-term relationship that isn't with a prostitute, although it may be just as expensive. It's the truly, seriously non-functional men who can ONLY get rental sex because they can't attain and maintain a stable relationship with a partner.

My original remark wasn't meant as a slur. From reading hundreds of Nemesis' comments online, I do doubt his ability to functional rationally with peers over the long haul, but perhaps in real life he exhibits a vastly different persona and behavior.

So, no - English Teachers DON'T ONLY get stuck with bar girls or bar boys. They have lots of choices.

[Ijustwannateach]

I would also agree that Nem has become slightly more rational in his most recent post- in *certain* schools in the upper-middle and higher range of the market, it's true that parents are happy to let us teach their children but would be horrified to have a social connection in the family like us (and would be equally horrified if those children themselves became teachers). It's part of the whole screwed up "money is everything" value system that the richer sorts have here, especially the Chinese Thai. But who would want to date them, anyway, unless you have the same screwed up values? Stick with the regular Thais and dispense with the pretense, the snobbery, and the lack of fun. You may not be marrying a heiress, but life will be better.

"Steven"

[Som Nam Na]

Why should teachers get stuck with bar girls when they have all those students to prey on eh?

[Ijustwannateach]

^I'll be a gentleman and assume you were not implying that's what I meant, although sadly that sort of thing does go on (more often with Thai teachers and students, by the way- at one of my previous schools the principal gave a lecture on this subject to the Thai teachers, reminding them that dalliances with their students are illegal).

No, in a normal Thai community there are plenty of nice-enough working class families to choose from in dating without getting involved in the psychological and social hangups of the nouveau Sino-rich.

"Steven"

[Heng]

Nemesis Posted on Sun 2004-09-12, 11:09:59

The point I trying to make is I think English teachers are being exploited by the upper class in Thai society to educate their children, while at the same time, for the most part, they don't want lower class farang involved with their families.

People have been taking advantage of others thoughout recorded history and almost certainly before then too. I think the old saying is 'No matter how advanced a culture may become, someone has to take out the garbage'.

Spot on.

[Harry Palmer]

Why should teachers get stuck with bar girls when they have all those students to prey on eh?

certified professional ELT's in the LoS just don't do that sort of thing (well almost never), it's against our moral code... there maybe a few kao-sarn road rotten eggs that give the rest of us a bad name but we can & do deal with them...

i would have no hesitation in going right to the 'top' if i ever knew or suspected that an ELT was abusing his/ her position in such a way...

'sword of truth & shield of fair play'...

PS .. is it true that the ladies who sell 'som tam' in front of the hualamphong train station in bangkok do in fact sell more than just somtam?