The bar girls aren't calling you "Darling" (English)..... they are called you "NaLing" (Thai -> Monkey Face)

You wont find that on Wikipedia !!!

speak for yourself!

Thais will refer to ferangs as Nah -ling because they have big round eyes like a monkey

Ferangs will refer to Thais as Nah -ling because they often have flat faces with a little nose bridge making them look like monkeys

99.999999999% of Thai drivers havent got a clue about road safety

Thai policemen's pants require less fabric then any other male policeman pants in the developed world.

i heard that Thailand's soil is of excellent quality

and that most anything can grow here

hence such a plentiful land

In Pattaya speak - 'Chang-over' is now more commonly used than 'hang-over'

The purging of all fluids from the head and nose cavitys, in as loud and demonstrative way as possible is perfectly acceptable in public, especially if you are a thai taxi driver.

Not washing the hands after doing a number 2 is very common amongst Thais

I wash my hands before i do a #2.

100% of Taxi meters are out of order in BGK. For me, anyway

Not washing the hands after doing a number 2 is very common amongst Thais

...that's the reason the "wai" was invented....

Fact, when I go to the supermarket and go up to the check out chick, all the chicks are checking me out mate!

Bankoks real name is KRUNGTHEP named after a packet of fags.............or maybe not

Kan Win

Fact, when I go to the supermarket and go up to the check out chick, all the chicks are checking me out mate!

And laughing behind your back.

cheers

onzestan

Thailand holds the Guinness book record for the biggest hamburger commercially available in the world. The record belongs to Barbecue Bob of Pattaya.

The worlds number one 'spin kicker' has announced that he wishes to reside in Thailand

In Thailand, it is illegal to leave your house without wearing underwear.

Kan Win

Thailand is the only country in the world where 7-Eleven staff don't get training on how to put the plastic lid on a Slurpee cup.

In Thailand, it is illegal to leave your house without wearing underwear.

Kan Win

It is also illegal to ride a motorbike without wearing a helmet and while using a mobile phone - on market days and in tourist areas. However, Thais can ride without helmets whilst using mobile phones with up to 7 passengers, so long as the driver is at least 7 years of age. (Excluding market days ofcourse!)

when you become a grandparent, your roof is guaranteed to leak. or someone in the family.

Central department store is the first .........and Chidlom is its first branch.

err, that would be central wangburapha......

If it's true, then I didn't know that and .....never heard of it and never been there, while growing up - except Chidlom branch which used to be called Seelom branch.

There's a Central Silom down near the Narai Hotel; it's been there since the 60s. Was Chitlom earlier? Wangburapha the first, eh? Makes sense.

Notwithstanding the fact that Thailand is a warm country in more ways than one, I've never had so many colds in my life!

Must be going in and out of the gogo - oops - I mean airco.

cheers

onzestan

There is a store on Soi Siam Country Club road called 7/10 it has the same colours and insignia as 7/11

There is a store on Soi Siam Country Club road called 7/10 it has the same colours and insignia as 7/11

(It's also CLOSED)

when you become a grandparent, your roof is guaranteed to leak. or someone in the family.

I can vouch for this as being fact

There is a store on Soi Siam Country Club road called 7/10 it has the same colours and insignia as 7/11

(It's also CLOSED)

As is the Macdomans burger place next door

it is almost impossible to grow potatoes in Thailand apart from cooler northern provinces,...the problem is believed to be that Thai soil and weather conditions create a growth spurt that the poor potato can not keepup with hence it matures inside without being in the position to maintain this,......hence it dies!

...mosquitos are attracted to smelly feet and body odour including your breath, drinking large amoubts of alchohol can sometimes put the mossies off track as they don't drink....they buzz around your ear to check if you are asleep then when the little bastards are sure you are asleep they they stick their dirty little syringe type needle into your blood supply and feed themselves.

Fact, when I go to the supermarket and go up to the check out chick, all the chicks are checking me out mate!

And laughing behind your back.

cheers

onzestan

They are scared of your spin/snap kick mate.

Eating farang chocolate is actively discouraged by the pricing policy of major supermarket chains.

.....well I told my mum I wouldn't need my balaclava !

It would take the wool from approximately 1.118 million average sheep to knit a balaclava helmet for each member of the Thai population......(and a considerable number of old women to knit them too)

Sorry hate to knit pick but it would be approximately 1.119 million average sheep.

TBWG

The worlds number one 'spin kicker' has announced that he wishes to reside in Thailand

Thailand will soon be home to the largest arms and smallest (insert your choice) in the world.