Am I Being Played?

[Beetlejuice]

She could be genuine.

If you are the gambling kind, place your chips on the table and see where the ball lands. I know what outcome I`m placing my bet on.

The original question, are you being played/? How should we know? I wouldn`t entertain or become involved with these people in the first place, they will only cause you problems.

Edited July 27, 2010 by Beetlejuice

[Eff1n2ret]

What is all this nonsense? The OP was nearly 2 years ago.

[sarahsbloke]

Bizz revives another 2 year old post!

What are you up to Bizz?

Guys, look at the posts Bizz has been making today, all on 2 year old posts.

Edited July 27, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[phomsanuk]

Why oh why do we keep falling for this, maybe:

Hope springs eternal Hope springs eternal in the human breast. Man never Is, but always To be blest. [1732 Pope Essay on Man i

[yabaaaa]

Chances "0"

Conclusion "sucker"

Result $0000000000000000000000000 in bank 4 u

OK he;s still a member and has posted on Visas for his Thai g/f recently (this year) so is this the same woman who u want a visa for???? Come on OP tell us how you,bought the house car land massage shop, helped the family of hi-so's???

Edited July 27, 2010 by yabaaaa

[yabaaaa]

Bizz revives another 2 year old post!

What are you up to Bizz?

Guys, look at the posts Bizz has been making today, all on 2 year old posts.

Who cares its good for a laugh as that's all it is.

[Vertigotogo]

there is one born every day and where ever is the op gone.

I bet he is happily married and living in Pattaya

[IanForbes]

Take any relationship, anywhere, as a big game. Enjoy yourself, be respectful, don't lie or cheat, and enjoy it for as long as it lasts. Who knows, it may last forever. However, in Thailand, never invest more than you are not willing to walk away from, no questions asked. If and when it ends, just be thankful for the good times you've had together.

[Beetlejuice]

The last I heard the girl conned the OP out of all his money and after 1 year of intense counselling he became a monk and now resides at the Wat Phra That Haripunjaya, in Lumphun.

[Vertigotogo]

Take any relationship, anywhere, as a big game. Enjoy yourself, be respectful, don't lie or cheat, and enjoy it for as long as it lasts. Who knows, it may last forever. However, in Thailand, never invest more than you are not willing to walk away from, no questions asked. If and when it ends, just be thankful for the good times you've had together.

Brilliantly put Ian

[GuestHouse]

The OP is not being played, he's playing himself.

And falling prey to the most dangerous lies of all - The Lies one tells oneself.

[sharking]

Hi guys thanks for the replies, I know the odds are against me and going by track record it looks a no brainer.

How do you think I should proceed? SHould I give it a chance in December or just tell her that this is not going to work and see how she reacts?

I dont think Im naive, just hopeful. There is no doubt she likes money, so do most women (but they play it in different ways)

And as far as the money is concerned she did mention a couple of times when we argued about if she didnt like me she could have other clients getting X amount of money and not be free to me. Also she saved me alot of money on the holiday but seeking the less expensive route, mentioning that customers would fly here and there, but she did not want that.

Be interesting to see if she lets me visit her parents then the whole thing changes then no? Why would she want me to spend 3-4 days in her village?

Dont flame me too much thanks

Seems that the general concensus is that I forget going in December rather than giving it a chance? It will never work, or there is too much risk.

Mind you I dont mind taking the risk, what do I have to lose going out there a second time and see what develops, if anything. If not I cut my losses, if I dont go I will never know???

I dont think its impossible that this could work, just that there is alot of risk and I have to be careful.

I think the main concern here is that she is an escort, but escorts do marry dont they, they are human beings afterall.

Obviously, you are trying to convince yourself. There's nothing dumber than someone who asks for advice and argues with the answer.

hi steve

did she tell you here family was poor???

needs a new house for her mum ???

needs a new motor bike????

this will soon be asked to you (not in all cases,but i have been told of this happening)

as for helping you with food a drink,well my wifie used to do that,lucky if she makes me a cup of tea now

but there has been plenty of advice on this thread,its what your going to do

go with your gut feeling

something fishy here though

sharking

[dmax]

i didnt even read onto the second sentence, no need to !! my motto is , IF YOU THINK YOU ARE BEING PLAYED THEN MORE THAN LIKELY YOU ARE !

[dmax]

how much were you giving her everday ?

[Vertigotogo]

i didnt even read onto the second sentence, no need to !! my motto is , IF YOU THINK YOU ARE BEING PLAYED THEN MORE THAN LIKELY YOU ARE !

Can't always be true, surely?

[MAJIC]

Hard to give an opinion,without some more background information,

however if the alarm bells are ringing then maybe you should listen to them,

after all its your doubts,not ours!

[David006]

Hi guys thanks for the replies, I know the odds are against me and going by track record it looks a no brainer.

How do you think I should proceed? SHould I give it a chance in December or just tell her that this is not going to work and see how she reacts?

I dont think Im naive, just hopeful. There is no doubt she likes money, so do most women (but they play it in different ways)

And as far as the money is concerned she did mention a couple of times when we argued about if she didnt like me she could have other clients getting X amount of money and not be free to me. Also she saved me alot of money on the holiday but seeking the less expensive route, mentioning that customers would fly here and there, but she did not want that.

Be interesting to see if she lets me visit her parents then the whole thing changes then no? Why would she want me to spend 3-4 days in her village?

Dont flame me too much thanks

Welcome to Thai visa,seem as you just joined.

There are a lot of great ladies in Thai,dont be in a hurry and you will find.

Don't waste your time and money on this one...would you marry a prostitute in your own country?

Good advice.

I know of lots of financially desperate good looking girls here, that would never consider going on the game.

I wager that this woman was well experienced when the OP hired her services, probably been at it for years.

Treat it like a breed of dog. Some breeds make good pets, others dont.

Remember, fools never listen to good advice, or use common sense, they only learn by experience.

Dont become one of those that so often end up telling all that went wrong on these ThaiVisa forums.

bet you wish you never posted..hugh......go with your gut mate..what can happen???

[rgs2001uk]

how much were you giving her everday ?

On average about 6 inches.

[Samuian]

Seems that the general concensus is that I forget going in December rather than giving it a chance? It will never work, or there is too much risk.

Mind you I dont mind taking the risk, what do I have to lose going out there a second time and see what develops, if anything. If not I cut my losses, if I dont go I will never know???

I dont think its impossible that this could work, just that there is alot of risk and I have to be careful.

I think the main concern here is that she is an escort, but escorts do marry dont they, they are human beings afterall.

Well, someone asked already "Would you if back home marry a professional escort there?"

You might say "why not" - one may agree, never say no!

But here in LoS the odds are way higher, that she is working you, 31 is an age where the person concerned could be easily 10-15 years in the trade, which would give her loads of experience, some prefer to work "younger" good looking man, they are easier to "work", time not wasted and after all the satisfaction of having done some damage... if you wish and are keen to have an experience you may never forget, wait, see and go ahead, if it works out after all you've won.. but.. as of her background I doubt it, there are others one couldn't drag with 1000 of Elephants into the trade and those who are they have some preference for it, why ever, some do it out of some sort of self punishment or to punish and shock their former lover cause he strayed... so some are severely damaged and seek revenge at random at anyone besides it is a sweet success, make someone to really love you, may yes even marry you, or to push the heat up - just talk about it and then drop him like a rotten apple, besides the money made... believe me there are some very sick people out there, it's a tough life and some can play the game so well that even a hardened, tough character will weep... believe me, some just have this knack.... being badly, badly hurt usually by their Thai-lover father of the kids, raped by one or several male family members.... they will never ever tell THEIR story... exceptions are rare, but one ever hears such a story... it's breathtaking, but makes the understanding of why some are as they are, way easier!

And the possibility that with her background it could turn out like this.... is as high as the Bayoke Tower, all of them know that their chances to come to the "west" would increase their possibilities of earn a "mint" compare to here... turns some into real clever conwomen !

So be warned and take good,good care... listen and watch carefully, don't let love wipe out your judgement!

my 2 Cent..

[TAWP]

If you are not going to proceed into a relationship, you should pay the fee you agreed on. Otherwise you have cheated her out of that too.

And yes, some girls, especially those that aren't so long time into the game, can fall for the guy they are working for if he is good looking, polite, don't treat her like the worker she is (don't ever EVER call her the P word) and have money that makes her comfortable that she will not need to work as such every again.

Is it love? Who knows, who cares. You would be getting a companion anyway.

And it doesn't matter if you meet a girl in a bar or not here, don't sign any houses over in her name, ever.

[Huey]

*sigh*

I mean honestly, was there anyone who has been here for more than a month who read this one simple line;

"I met a Thai girl online, who happens to provide an escort service"

And DID NOT just stop right there and say to them selves... "YES of course your being played!"

Never ceases to amaze me...

[GreenSnapper]

These old threads make some fun reading. But of course I'm eager to know how the story ended.

[siamamerican]

For the love of God, why did you think this was the place to ask relationship questions. For the most part we are much older, uglier, and stupid than the Thai girls we enjoy. We are incapable of looking in the mirror and offering you any rationale advice. All the girls here are whores and we are kind old sweaty old men that support these depraved girls with our well intentioned donations. We left our home country women and traded up after many failed relationships back home. Now though we are macho super lovers that frown on the weak that actually fall for a TG. You wussy, get your head together.

[Vertigotogo]

For the love of God, why did you think this was the place to ask relationship questions. For the most part we are much older, uglier, and stupid than the Thai girls we enjoy. We are incapable of looking in the mirror and offering you any rationale advice. All the girls here are whores and we are kind old sweaty old men that support these depraved girls with our well intentioned donations. We left our home country women and traded up after many failed relationships back home. Now though we are macho super lovers that frown on the weak that actually fall for a TG. You wussy, get your head together.

Speak for yourself

[siamamerican]

If you are not going to proceed into a relationship, you should pay the fee you agreed on. Otherwise you have cheated her out of that too.

And yes, some girls, especially those that aren't so long time into the game, can fall for the guy they are working for if he is good looking, polite, don't treat her like the worker she is (don't ever EVER call her the P word) and have money that makes her comfortable that she will not need to work as such every again.

Is it love? Who knows, who cares. You would be getting a companion anyway.

And it doesn't matter if you meet a girl in a bar or not here, don't sign any houses over in her name, ever.

Nice post but don't agree with the last sentence. There is a time and place for almost anything and putting a house in her name is appropriate at times. If you have the money and the relationship is solid, why not? If she leaves you for a house, then you just got out of relationship earlier than otherwise. The house also levels the playing field somewhat and, in my opinion, is good in any relationship.

[kevozman1]

Hi there

I know alot of people will probably be judgemental regarding thism but here goes, I wont go into all the detail but summarise the maini points.

I met a Thai girl online, who happens to provide an escort service. That was the initial intention, but then we got to like one another during the 2 weeks I spent with her. Shes educated and used to have a decent job, but allegedly used the internet after breaking up with her cheating boyfriend, shes 31 by the way. She told me her rate and I said it was quite expensive so I made her an offer , she said she would see when she meets me, was quite fussy about what I looked like etc.

At the end of the holiday she didnt ask for any money and appeared (even found money in the hotel and gave it to me) to be enjoying my company as I am a similar age to her and we got on very well sexually and personality wise, we even had a few arguments like boyfriend and girlfriend do, this had never happend to her before when meeting clients it was a more professional basis. I was ill and she looked after me, she seemed to care filling my plate when it was empty and glass etc. She even paid for some of the meal we had one day. Im going back in December and she wants me to visit her place where she grew up (maybe family). I have also spoken to one of her cousins (female) who saked me about myself and what I did.

She tells me she has no children and is quite open with me. By the way I dont find it difficult to attract women back here in Europe, so we seem a good match together. She even talked about cooking for me and if we were married she would care more for me then her MOM.

I know that she still does her job and Im fine with that, but Im not sure if Im just another client or if this is genuine (afterall she is a sort of escort), its 50/50 in my gut. We communicate now and again on MSN and email and text almost every day.

I know this might be a bit pathetic, but what are the chances this is genuine? I will probably know more in December when I return.

The alarm bells should be ringing on this one....Not going to say your naive, but to pick up on a couple of points, She told you her "rate" and at the end of the "holiday" you never paid her....you will find in Thailand the working girls will never ask you at the end of "business" for the money, you should have offered the cash, as if you ask the question...how much..stock line is up to you...

Personally thinking you may be getting prepped to become a walking ATM, hence the reason for the "freebie"

Also the statement "she would take care of you, more than her Mom".....a very un-Thai sentiment, as you know in Thailand the children are suppose to look after the family and the family comes first, so this statement goes against Thai culture, but in the west children are not expected to look after the family in the same way, so have a feeling she was telling you what you wanted to hear...

Well just spend some more time with her if you enjoy her company. Not

going to lie it sounds quite a volatile situation you are going into but I really

can not say too much as I do not know you or the lady.

By the way do not listen to Soutpeel. The fact she did not ask you for money

is definately a good sign, she must like you and would like to be your

partner or she had a good time and did not want to spoil it by asking for cash.

Forget about what he said when talking about working girls in Thailand. If the girl was

looking at you as a customer you would have had to pay and she would not just accept

her fate because you have not offered the cash to her.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

[kevozman1]

Very hesitant to post, but here goes. Enjoy.

It all sounds bog-standard. But. It is possible that she's on the up and up.

Here's the old Thailand wisdom that I have a small problem with. 'She will NEVER put you before her family'.

After 5 years with my wife, I can categorically state that it isn't true in her case. (Howls of laughter in the background... Look, he says mine's different )

I am a pretty cynical not-so-old bastard. I didn't come to this conclusion easily, but I am not willing to lay out our life story on the net.

Furthermore, I also know a couple other Thai females for which this holds true.

I know Thai culture is this great monolithic unmovable thing in most peoples minds, and it holds true for the vast majority of Thai people, but it doesn't mean that ALL Thai adhere to it religiously. There are a growing number of people here that are changing their views and personal culture. A great deal depends on you, whether you can establish a personal contact - not easy if faced with cultural and language problems, not to mention the mutually-advantageous-contract style of a lot of relationships.

I wonder (maybe a poll) how many guys married to Thai females for a while would have found this after a few years together. I suspect there are a few.

Very good post and nice to hear from someone who can think outside of box instead of

your average Thai visa poster who attitute is "I came to Thailand tried to date a Thai girl

half my age, that did not work out so from now on I am going to trash every possible

other realtionship someone could have with a Thai woman."

[aussiebebe]

To the OP, yes it could be genuine. I liked the comment from 'Kevosman1', but I'm not being cynical when I write that, in my opinion, the majority of Thai-foreign relationships can be explained in purely financial terms. Whilst living in Bangkok for almost 4 years, I've met some Thais who out-earn their foreign spouses, but they haven't been in the majority, maybe that reflects nothing more than the company I keep.

[mrtoad]

there is one born every day and where ever is the op gone.

I bet he is happily married and living in Pattaya

Or has taken a plunge from a balcony.

[Aikido]

In my limited experience of Los [10 years], ive found most girls like this are in for the long haul, very experienced when they find a sucker, and very good at the waiting game, that should tell you all you need to know mate.

Edited July 28, 2010 by Aikido