Another Sin Sod Question

[Inthai]

So before wedding, she said....... and i could be lucky that i only need to pay 300000 as normally she should get more.....

My question is would you really want to be married to somebody for the rest of your life who speaks to you in this manner? Who has this mindset? That you're "lucky" to only be paying this much and she "should get more"?

Irrespective of the "should I pay/shouldn't I pay" argument I'm afraid I simply couldn't consider a somebody as a life time partner who had that attitude. This is supposedly a lifetime commitment. A wife has to be some sort of soulmate. Somebody to share the joys and tears of what life has to offer. The good times and bad. The rough and the smooth. Somebody who you can speak to about your hopes and fears, your dreams or simply your day. Somebody to have a laugh and a joke with. Somebody to just chill out with in front of the TV. Somebody to be the mother of your children. Not somebody who considers you "lucky" to be getting her on the cheap for want of a better word.

MY mother and father just celebrated their 43rd wedding anniversary. Next month I will have been with my Khon Kaen wife nearly 15 years and have 2 children. We have never, and I repeat never, spoken a single bad word between us. We fit together like a jigsaw. Isn't that what a marriage should be about?

You are so right and this is probably best comment of all. Thanks

Thanks also for everyones feedback on this.

[waikhru]

not every thai is out to get your money.

really the custom is and should be to present the money at the wedding, however if your going to pay the money anyway it really does not matter to you when you give it.

Are you worried that you will pay and your girl will do a runner.if so there is not enough trust to marry.

[itiswhatitis]

I had to return back to Germany last November, as I went nearly broke due to lots of bad investment decisions in 2008

Fast forward to 2009...

she mentioned that I need to transfer her at least 300'000 baht to her account, otherwise it will not be possible to get married, as her mother is demanding it.

...

She also asked for around 100'000 Baht to open a small restaurant in her village for her sister, which has no job right now.

Sounds like you're about to make lots of bad investment decisions in 2009 as well!

I normally don't comment in these threads, but this one's just too ironic not to. Of course you do not give her the money under any circumstances. That's the end of it. Everything else is just dealing with the personal emotional fallout of that correct decision.

Super comment

BTW

I'm 21 and my thai girfriend did the same thing last night ( 300000 THB ) + you pay rings party and 20000 for me ( 9 month relationship ). she is 20 no job no school intill i meet her she workt in a bar ( full monty precatly every night) and gave birth to a dead baby when she was 17. and if i dont pay she will leave me. Tonight i will make here the conteroffer of 100000 all inclusive and if she ( her grandmother ) not exepts her bag will be waiting at the door. and on firday i will get a call from her that she wants me back and that the 100000 is OK

Or so i hope

[RAZZELL]

Think you should walk away son. At your age, you don't want to start a life of problems which sounds like your heading for.

Seconded

What happened to the OP? Did he pay? Married?

RAZZ

[neverdie]

I knew a guy that was about to marry a thai girl and the flamming sin sod subject came up, he played dumb and asked what it was about. His fiance explained it to him, at which time he informed her that it was a custom in his country that the females parents to pay money to the husband to help take care of the wife. The fiance was shocked to hear this and said she would speak to her parents about it.

The following week after this was discussed at the in-laws place, the parents asked if it could be considered that both customs were struck off, effectively cancelling each other out. A PERFECT agreement was reached & the issue never discussed again.

I believe they have been married for about 10 years now.

[needforspeed]

Just read comments on other stories like this and you find the answer.

[Thongkorn]

First , she can ask for Sin-sod, Secondly its OK for the man to say, I do not have that amount will you take less, Just remember Money Number 1 in Thailand , As you have read on this post many members have not paid anything, and still have a good relationship with there Wife' and there Family, I for one have never been asked for any money not once, like many others,

[NADTATIDA1]

21 Counter offer.....1st post search reply, troll for sure....pack your bags gone already. BAH!!!

[Lammbock]

BTW

I'm 21 and my thai girfriend did the same thing last night ( 300000 THB ) + you pay rings party and 20000 for me ( 9 month relationship ). she is 20 no job no school intill i meet her she workt in a bar ( full monty precatly every night) and gave birth to a dead baby when she was 17. and if i dont pay she will leave me. Tonight i will make here the conteroffer of 100000 all inclusive and if she ( her grandmother ) not exepts her bag will be waiting at the door. and on firday i will get a call from her that she wants me back and that the 100000 is OK

Or so i hope

What a silly boy u are. When i was 21 i had 10 Girlfriends between Nana and Soi Cowboy from the range of a bar girl true a real estate agend until a hot <deleted>.

Now i am 25 and still have 8.

......where is the Milk Bottle for the boy????

Edited March 22, 2010 by Lammbock

[dmax]

i paid my wife 100,000 thats said to be the going rate. my wife actually asked me for 50,000 baht but i was flush at the time and decided to give her a bit more and also out of respect for her ( not her family ) my wife was a bargirl by the way and i hear many say that the rate for sin sod for bar girls is 30,000 or so and nil if they,ve been married previously to a thai husband or got kids. mine has 2 kids and also had thai husband before. as i say it was only out of respect, if the family demanded it i would of told them to get lost . i understand your wife as she is obviously obeying her parents. i think it is totally wrong for them to demand anything . if i was in your shoes i would put it off . a marriage is meant to be a joyfull happy occasion dont let their demands for mney spoil your relationship with your partner. good luck

[dmax]

Tell her you wont pay anything. If she says no wedding then just say ok. If she still says no wedding until you pay the money just tell her to fuc_k off ..

I am sure she will then say that she will talk to her mother and get a lower amount for you to pay.

But you shouldnt pay anything at all... Only weak and ugly Farangs pay becuase they cant find a woman that will marry them for no money ... you know who you are guys

boll**x....... pay it out of respect for your gilfriend , what would you pay your farang wife if she demanded it ? eh ?

[dmax]

I knew a guy that was about to marry a thai girl and the flamming sin sod subject came up, he played dumb and asked what it was about. His fiance explained it to him, at which time he informed her that it was a custom in his country that the females parents to pay money to the husband to help take care of the wife. The fiance was shocked to hear this and said she would speak to her parents about it.

The following week after this was discussed at the in-laws place, the parents asked if it could be considered that both customs were struck off, effectively cancelling each other out. A PERFECT agreement was reached & the issue never discussed again.

I believe they have been married for about 10 years now.

haha smart move, fair play to the guy in question

[Garry9999]

Shouldn't this be posted in the "Sin sod section". Oh that's right... there isn't one

Why don't you just say fine and put off the marriage indefinately. It sounds like extortion to me. And it also sounds like it will make it even more difficult for you to get your life back on track financially.

I can see how you managed to make a lot of bad investment decisions... Here's your chance to change that pattern and make a good one .

Yes, there should be a sin sot section, that way I could completely ignore it.

[RAZZELL]

Tell her you wont pay anything. If she says no wedding then just say ok. If she still says no wedding until you pay the money just tell her to fuc_k off ..

I am sure she will then say that she will talk to her mother and get a lower amount for you to pay.

But you shouldnt pay anything at all... Only weak and ugly Farangs pay becuase they cant find a woman that will marry them for no money ... you know who you are guys

RAZZ

[dave30]

Tell her you wont pay anything. If she says no wedding then just say ok. If she still says no wedding until you pay the money just tell her to fuc_k off ..

I am sure she will then say that she will talk to her mother and get a lower amount for you to pay.

But you shouldnt pay anything at all... Only weak and ugly Farangs pay becuase they cant find a woman that will marry them for no money ... you know who you are guys

boll**x....... pay it out of respect for your gilfriend , what would you pay your farang wife if she demanded it ? eh ?

dmax, i read one of your posts the other day, when you said you wanted to leave your wife and how bad she was to you. So really you have wasted 100000 baht on sweet fuc_k all. But thats what u get when you marry a bar girl. You say about respect for your gf... Thats great for you but your gf doesnt respect you if she wants money just to marry you. I have never been married to a any woman. But i have never heard of a guy paying sin son for a farang woman. I think a Western Father would be ashamed to take money away from his daughters future husbend.

As i said before only weak and ugly farang guys pay sin sod... becuase they want to find ' love ' ... something they cant find without paying for it

I can only imagine the Thai virson of Romeo and Juilet.. a 2 hour film about sin sid arugements... ahh ture love.

The Bottom line is Sid Sod is a joke and any western who is stupid enough to pay it is a joke and deseves all the bad things his wife does to him

[steffi]

The way it works is a number is spoken about and then you can negotiate that number. Anything else should be warning signs.

[sarahsbloke]

boll**x....... pay it out of respect for your girlfriend , what would you pay your farang wife if she demanded it ? eh ?

My 'farang wife' got 600,000UKP in sinsot, just at the end of the marriage not the start, and awarded by a judge.

In the western world we all pay money for our women, just not so upfront.

I agreed to pay 100,000bht sinsot here in Thailand, but as a gift to my wife, not to her family, and in installments after the wedding, 50k after the first month, 50k after the second month (she tells me she intends to buy 5 rai of land with the money in her village).

The level of financial security awarded in Thailand after a failed marriage is almost zero.

(unless you are daft enough to put things in the lady's name and that is just plain stupid)

You can walk away from a wife and child here and leave them destitute, is a little bit of insurance for them too much to ask for?

PS

I did pay for the wedding too .......

70bht at the amphur office on valentines day

100bht for the wedding dinner at my local restaurant (they only asked for 60bht), they shaped the rice into little hearts and put candles on the table.

A much nicer wedding day than purchased previously in the UK for a small fortune, and if it doesn't work out then I will not have any regrets, just nice memories.

Edited March 22, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[RAZZELL]

Tell her you wont pay anything. If she says no wedding then just say ok. If she still says no wedding until you pay the money just tell her to fuc_k off ..

I am sure she will then say that she will talk to her mother and get a lower amount for you to pay.

But you shouldnt pay anything at all... Only weak and ugly Farangs pay becuase they cant find a woman that will marry them for no money ... you know who you are guys

boll**x....... pay it out of respect for your gilfriend , what would you pay your farang wife if she demanded it ? eh ?

dmax, i read one of your posts the other day, when you said you wanted to leave your wife and how bad she was to you. So really you have wasted 100000 baht on sweet fuc_k all. But thats what u get when you marry a bar girl. You say about respect for your gf... Thats great for you but your gf doesnt respect you if she wants money just to marry you. I have never been married to a any woman. But i have never heard of a guy paying sin son for a farang woman. I think a Western Father would be ashamed to take money away from his daughters future husbend.

As i said before only weak and ugly farang guys pay sin sod... becuase they want to find ' love ' ... something they cant find without paying for it

I can only imagine the Thai virson of Romeo and Juilet.. a 2 hour film about sin sid arugements... ahh ture love.

The Bottom line is Sid Sod is a joke and any western who is stupid enough to pay it is a joke and deseves all the bad things his wife does to him

You have absolutely no idea...

RAZZ

[dave30]

Tell her you wont pay anything. If she says no wedding then just say ok. If she still says no wedding until you pay the money just tell her to fuc_k off ..

I am sure she will then say that she will talk to her mother and get a lower amount for you to pay.

But you shouldnt pay anything at all... Only weak and ugly Farangs pay becuase they cant find a woman that will marry them for no money ... you know who you are guys

boll**x....... pay it out of respect for your gilfriend , what would you pay your farang wife if she demanded it ? eh ?

dmax, i read one of your posts the other day, when you said you wanted to leave your wife and how bad she was to you. So really you have wasted 100000 baht on sweet fuc_k all. But thats what u get when you marry a bar girl. You say about respect for your gf... Thats great for you but your gf doesnt respect you if she wants money just to marry you. I have never been married to a any woman. But i have never heard of a guy paying sin son for a farang woman. I think a Western Father would be ashamed to take money away from his daughters future husbend.

As i said before only weak and ugly farang guys pay sin sod... becuase they want to find ' love ' ... something they cant find without paying for it

I can only imagine the Thai virson of Romeo and Juilet.. a 2 hour film about sin sid arugements... ahh ture love.

The Bottom line is Sid Sod is a joke and any western who is stupid enough to pay it is a joke and deseves all the bad things his wife does to him

You have absolutely no idea...

RAZZ

RAZZ , how much did you pay ?

are you Old, Fat or Ugly ? If you are all 3 i am willing to bet you paid alot to your wife when she married you .

That is the only reason why any of the farangs here pay.. If they are old fat or ugly then they will pay. But for a good looking bloke ( like myself ) there is no need to pay.

Where are you from ??? Are fathers / Grandfathers didnt win a world war and give us freedom so there weak little off springs could go off and find a pay as you go wife .. The old timers would be turning in there graves if they could see the losers they fought for .

Be a man, get a grip go and talk to a normal woman and find a real gf / wife who you dont have to pay for

[Oldvisitor]

Show her the door.....

" Amen "

[RAZZELL]

RAZZ , how much did you pay ?

are you Old, Fat or Ugly ? If you are all 3 i am willing to bet you paid alot to your wife when she married you .

That is the only reason why any of the farangs here pay.. If they are old fat or ugly then they will pay. But for a good looking bloke ( like myself ) there is no need to pay.

Where are you from ??? Are fathers / Grandfathers didnt win a world war and give us freedom so there weak little off springs could go off and find a pay as you go wife .. The old timers would be turning in there graves if they could see the losers they fought for .

Be a man, get a grip go and talk to a normal woman and find a real gf / wife who you dont have to pay for

Well, I'm not old, fat or ugly...and I'm not married

You have no idea about Thailand and no idea about sin sod - the majority of the Thai male population pay. I suggest you read this:

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Sin-Sod-Expl...ion-t85581.html

I also humbly suggest you look at other culture's and religion's where some sort of dowry is common, China and India, Hinduism and Judaism for example.

With your logic, in the UK when the father of the bride pays for the wedding, that's buying a husband is it?

Basically, you're showing yourself up as the uneducated philistine that you obviously are

RAZZ

Edited March 22, 2010 by RAZZELL

[Oldvisitor]

I don't know if sin sod is real or not, but I would never pay it. Could if be that in Thailand there's no retirement funds?

[kikoman]

The writing is on the wall, but it appears you can not see it!

Your are being taken for a ride!

Get out now or put off the wedding for good.

Cheers:

[Mossfinn]

I guess you last 10 or so guys all realized this was a first time poster, replying to a year old thread, right,

Right

[a2396]

I had to return back to Germany last November, as I went nearly broke due to lots of bad investment decisions in 2008

Fast forward to 2009...

she mentioned that I need to transfer her at least 300'000 baht to her account, otherwise it will not be possible to get married, as her mother is demanding it.

...

She also asked for around 100'000 Baht to open a small restaurant in her village for her sister, which has no job right now.

Sounds like you're about to make lots of bad investment decisions in 2009 as well!

I normally don't comment in these threads, but this one's just too ironic not to. Of course you do not give her the money under any circumstances. That's the end of it. Everything else is just dealing with the personal emotional fallout of that correct decision.

Super comment

BTW

I'm 21 and my thai girfriend did the same thing last night ( 300000 THB ) + you pay rings party and 20000 for me ( 9 month relationship ). she is 20 no job no school intill i meet her she workt in a bar ( full monty precatly every night) and gave birth to a dead baby when she was 17. and if i dont pay she will leave me. Tonight i will make here the conteroffer of 100000 all inclusive and if she ( her grandmother ) not exepts her bag will be waiting at the door. and on firday i will get a call from her that she wants me back and that the 100000 is OK

Or so i hope

I really don't know why you would want to be with a woman who is obviously manipulating you for money, to the tune of 200,000 bht. To me, that's not exactly "chicken feed". How much does she want for monthly "maintenance money"? Bar girl, no job, no school? A dime a dozen here.

[Garry9999]

I guess you last 10 or so guys all realized this was a first time poster, replying to a year old thread, right,

Right

inthai last seen online 2009-06-21 04:44:14 - I guess he sorted it out already.

[dave30]

Well Dave, you are a Troll, with a big T. You sound like a bloke with a pony tail, lots of cheap medallions round your neck, that walks around with rolled up bank notes in your hand to give everyone the IMPRESSION your a film star but really are just a plonker. Sorry but it's just the picture you portray in my mind with your posts, you know, sort of brain dead.

Have you been stalking me ? you are spot on about everything about me. I carry a big wod of 20 bahts and have a huge gold medallion around my neck. It seems to work throw. Every time i go to Nana the girls seem to think i am handsome and they always invite me in for a drink.

[TAWP]

Her mother wants money to be transfered to her daughters (my GF) account before wedding. My GF said, she then will just tell mohter that she got Sinsod and that will be enough...no showing money or any display of it anywhere.....

The proof it is a scam is that it is a requirement of wirefransfer way ahead of the wedding and that 'no showing money or display' etc which is the exact inverted behavior regarding sin sod. It is ALL about showing showing wealth and the daughters value. To show 0 baht at the wedding does then not make sense.

Most likely the parents have a gambling debt you have to cover. My GF has payed over 3mill to cover for her dad sofar (not a cent from me) due to gambling. Hope you run fast.

[TAWP]

i paid my wife 100,000 thats said to be the going rate. my wife actually asked me for 50,000 baht but i was flush at the time and decided to give her a bit more and also out of respect for her ( not her family ) my wife was a bargirl by the way and i hear many say that the rate for sin sod for bar girls is 30,000 or so and nil if they,ve been married previously to a thai husband or got kids. mine has 2 kids and also had thai husband before. as i say it was only out of respect, if the family demanded it i would of told them to get lost . i understand your wife as she is obviously obeying her parents. i think it is totally wrong for them to demand anything . if i was in your shoes i would put it off . a marriage is meant to be a joyfull happy occasion dont let their demands for mney spoil your relationship with your partner. good luck

A bargirl with 2 kids and a previous marriage and you think forking out 100k is a sign of respect?

You have just shown everyone that she married a daft man with too much money. And made the rest of the village hungry for the same kind of person...

Atleast we now know who is pushing up the sums that are requested for cases that should be 0 baht sin sod marriages.

[Tod Daniels]

The amount of money foreigners’ pony up for a ‘gently-used’ and/or ‘second-hand’ woman; some with rug-rats in tow to boot is literally mind wobbling.

Unfortunately, or possibly not. … I refuse to comment further due to my posting penchants towards foreign sock-puppet wanna-b-thais and their (in)significant others.

That and not wanting to be ‘invited’ to an extended vacation by the powerz that be. ..

I will however concur with other more illustrious posters when reading the poster know as 'dmax' and his previous posts. He's got a match truly made in heaven. I can't even begin to tell him how much I respect him. ..

And now back to the pissing match already in progress. .. ..