Guidelines For Meeting Thai Girls

[Limey]

The following is my advice for meeting girls in Thailand, and its how i see things here. Its certainly not the only way to meet girls here, just how i do. Also bare in mind that im not a long term thailand veteran or anything. Ive spent around 6 weeks in Thailand in total, but the rules only ever change slightly - FACT.

These are guidelines only...

First of all decide what type of relationship you want - if any, and know that upfront before you even get to the club/bar or wherever.

Secondly, write down what your looking for in a girl. If you dont know what you want from a partner then your just going to end up with whatever happens to come along and thats just stupid. Seriously stupid. Thats just like aimlessly walking around until you get lost, and then your stuck in a shitty situation.

Thirdly, decide what you dont want. Unfortunately i cant be as picky as i am back home. I wrote this yesterday in another thread

3 types of girls I avoid are: -

1. Ladyboys

2. Prostitutes

3. Lodgers (a term ive coined for girls who dont necessarily want direct payment, but want to set up camp in your room and have you pay for everything while your with them).

Write the answers to 1, 2 and 3 down so its clear. Back home for me there is a huge list of NO's, out here fortunately most women dont come with all the gossipy drama (or if they do i cant tell because that all takes place when speaking thai), but the girls im looking for are certainly the minority.

To drink or not to drink?

Thats a personal one. I dont drink - here are the benefits: -

1. Dulling the senses is the last thing id want to do in Thailand where u really need to have your wits about you.

2. You only need to take a small amount of cash out with you

3. You only need one drink per place (unless your there all night) and that keeps you away from the bar

4. You save a shit load of money!

Honesty

If your not going to pay for a woman be upfront. This is basic damage control! If you dont ask that question and money doesnt get brought up theres always gonna be the chance that the next morning she may be expecting a payment. I usually just ask if shes working as soon as possible in the interaction. If she is i politely explain and excuse myself

Also since i only take a small amount of money out i just let them know that i dont have any. Its a discreet way handling that problem.. (Thats worked out extremely well for me in the past- she bought my drinks all night and paid for club entry. One time only though, and she was a great girl. Only the one time though).

Precedents! So important

Dont buy her a drink. Man this is such a big one. You buy her a drink your generally shooting yourself in the foot. This is setting the way for buying her drinks all night, then breakfast, lunch, dinner, shoes, mobile phone credit etc etc etc etc etc. Im exagerating obviously but ive had bad results...

Keep things as equal as possible. Since im only drinking water this is a lot easier for me to do, as someone who does drink may look like a cheapass, where i have a plausible excuse, ie. im not thirsty now maybe later (and later never seems to come - bizarre). Thats if it the situation arises. If you do buy her a drink make her do something for it - nothing too crude. Make her make out with you or make an elephant noise or something - just anything so its not free. If shes shit dont buy her one... (unless she actually was trying to kiss you properly but was just rubbish, that would be harsh!)

Dont set a precedent which leads to you taking care of her if thats not what you want.

You need to use your own judgement and common sense here. Dont refuse to buy her a 10baht piece of fruit, but if something like that happens, buy a few pieces and share them. This could go on forever so moving on...

Telling girls apart?

In my opinion theres no way to tell a womans situation apart from the ridiculously obvious hookers. Be upfront and only do things on your terms. If your not a chump she'll appreciate that anyway. If she isnt a hooker but gets annoyed when you ask her, shes probably just feigning it. Keep you composure at all times. If shes clearly pissed dont apologise like a chump, just ignore it and move the conversation on. You had to ask and she will get over it.

Im sure there are different groups of thought on this but im not gonna spend anytime playing spot the difference.

Intuition

If your getting a bad feeling about a girl, or just a general bad vibe move on, preferably to another place. There is no shortage of women and that shit aint worth it. Plenty of horror stories floating about already without you adding to them.

Relationships

Entertain no thoughts of having a relationship whatsoever until after youve had sex. The reasons for this are that you know if you simply dont have chemisty, you know she hasnt got like herpes or anything similar, and people start showing their true colours more. Im also not at all down with sleeping with women who have partners. Thats just messed up and there is an abudance here

If you are looking for a relationship then take things slow as hel_l. So many guys just stay with the first girl theyre lucky enough to get. Its hard meeting a girl who's the right person for you longterm, and the first one that comes a long probably wont be. Besides if you havent experienced different girls then how you gonna know what you want anyway? Makesure you know what you want in a girl!

I personally prefer spending time with one girl if I enjoy her company. The whole belt notches thing for me isnt appealing. To each their own though...

Wingmen

It is easier when your out with someone providing theyre not useless with women. If you are stuck with someone whos clueless go meet a random group of people and then introduce your friend to them. If thats not an option then, well, just be creative! and good luck. If your going out with more than one other person then split up, meet a few different groups of girls and then pull them all together.

Always check for the ladyboy tell tales! ESPECIALLY if youve had a drink or three

Keep your options open until your ready to leave

When you leave the club/bar know exactly where your going

If your taking your girl back to where your staying dont leave it a hole and dont leave valuables lying about. Common sense but people get burned all the time with this basic stuff.

Have condoms on you 24/7 and ALWAYS where them, even when your just walking through the park or shopping on your own...

Theres always the risk of being scammed, robbed, threatened that 'big boy' is gonna come round if you dont pay her money you havent agreed on the following morning etc. Be careful and try and cover the bases before sex.

In summary

Dont drink, be honest and makesure your both on the same page, dont take a lot of money out, know exactly what you want before you go out, trust your intuition and dont be dumbass.

Oh yeah, and enjoy yourself!

Id also like to say that i have absolutely no problem with hookers or lodgers, and ladyboys I just straight dont understand. Im in no position to make any judgements around these things as the culture and general situation around these girls is far from anything back in the uk. I simply dont pay for sex, and i cannot afford to support girls while im here. If i thought a girl really liked me and not just for some sort of payment i wouldnt have any worries about taking care of her for however long the relationship lasted if i had the cash.

Hope this helps!

[tc101]

Thanks for your thoughts. A few questions:

You said you didn't drink. I don't either. When you go into a bar or club, what are you expected to buy?

How long have you been in Thailand? How long do you plan to say?

[garyh]

You consider a ladyboy to be a girl?

[Orac]

Are you serious about wearing a condom when walking through a park or shopping on your own????

[Limey]

Thanks for your thoughts. A few questions:

You said you didn't drink. I don't either. When you go into a bar or club, what are you expected to buy?

How long have you been in Thailand? How long do you plan to say?

Im currently not in thailand, im heading back to Bangkok by train today with a lovely 2 month visa. Ive only spent around 6 weeks in total.

When i go out i only ever drink water. Sometimes im not thirsty so just dont drink anything

You consider a ladyboy to be a girl?

Theyre more girl than guy, and the few ive met dont like being referred to as 'dude', so yes i do. More straight guys hook up with ladyboys by accident then they do actual guys by accident to!

Are you serious about wearing a condom when walking through a park or shopping on your own????

LOL. No mate... bloody hel_l....

[sanmiguellight]

I simply dont pay for sex.

Whenever people have to come out and say something like that i always think the opposite is true, as if it wasnt an issue they wouldnt have mentioned it!

Luckily for me i flicked through that post and read the bottom paragraph first, so i wont be wondering what i'd have done if i had wasted 10 minutes reading such Cod Philosophy!

PS you arent Chris Pizzaboy who wrote Thailand Fever are you?

[sanmiguellight]

Are you serious about wearing a condom when walking through a park or shopping on your own????

Its the safest way for boys who like to go cruising!

[barrybike]

did this advice help you that is the question...........

[garyh]

Thanks for your thoughts. A few questions:

You said you didn't drink. I don't either. When you go into a bar or club, what are you expected to buy?

How long have you been in Thailand? How long do you plan to say?

Im currently not in thailand, im heading back to Bangkok by train today with a lovely 2 month visa. Ive only spent around 6 weeks in total.

When i go out i only ever drink water. Sometimes im not thirsty so just dont drink anything

You consider a ladyboy to be a girl?

Theyre more girl than guy, and the few ive met dont like being referred to as 'dude', so yes i do. More straight guys hook up with ladyboys by accident then they do actual guys by accident to!

Are you serious about wearing a condom when walking through a park or shopping on your own????

LOL. No mate... bloody hel_l....

Ladyboy's are not girls, never done it but if you turn one over and it has a willy it ain't a girl!

[Limey]

Lol. Well i suppose i consider ladyboys to be transexuals rather than transvestites. Regardless I avoid them and thats all that matters!

[sgunn65]

On the other hand you could just go out and enjoy yourself. Don't worry about evil thai's waiting around every corner to scam you or predatory girls who are after your money. Sometimes you win sometimes you lose but the fun is in the journey.

[MiG16]

moving this one to the farang pub and expat life forum

[Thailaw]

You would have been far better moving this one into the dust bin where it belongs, and saved TV Forum readers each about 5 minutes (10 minutes if you are a slow reader) of their valuable time. What an absolute bunch of crap!!

[thithi]

gawd...

if u dnt want to meet THOSE, then just dnt go out.

if u love Thailand, then move to stay somewhere in a hill.

all types of girls u'd mentioned are in everywhere!

Edited August 18, 2009 by thithi

[Datsun240Z]

You consider a ladyboy to be a girl?

If the job is done the right way, why not

[britmaveric]

Advice from Agony Uncle Limey?

[SHYTALK]

Well..... seems to me you're only left with Rosie (Palm) !!

[DP25]

3 types of girls I avoid are: -

2. Prostitutes

This does not make sense considering this

Precedents! So important

Dont buy her a drink. Man this is such a big one.

If you do buy her a drink make her do something for it - nothing too crude. Make her make out with you or make an elephant noise or something - just anything so its not free. If shes shit dont buy her one...

If you're hanging out in a bar, where the girls are going up to you asking for 'drinks' and willing to make out with you for them, they are prostitutes. Nothing wrong with that. In 'normal' bars, girls do not go up to random farang and ask them for drinks, and then make elephant sounds to get them. Way to go dude, you can get sex out of prostitutes by claiming to be broke and showing them your empty wallet.

Edited August 19, 2009 by DP25

[BWFC]

Needless to say you've not been laid in quite some time then?

[RachaRob]

I usualy end up making the elephant noises later back in my room!

[seri thai]

The following is my advice for meeting girls in Thailand, and its how i see things here. Its certainly not the only way to meet girls here, just how i do. Also bare in mind that im not a long term thailand veteran or anything. Ive spent around 6 weeks in Thailand in total, but the rules only ever change slightly - FACT.

These are guidelines only...

I'm probably being ungracious but what altruistic ethic drove you to pass on this unsolicited advice to the TV losers? Are you starting a cult?

One other question please. Which of the following does international womenhood find most attractive about you: Your ego, your no nonsense, laser targeted practicality or erm, your ego?

But seriously, thanks for the entertainment, love the paperback, get in touch with my people. Look forward to the movie

Just goes to prove another hard and fast rule. Never sit next to the guy in the bar drinking water.

[Eazy-Going]

Why make such a science out of going out and enjoying yourself? In fact do you have time to enjoy yourself after you've gone through your procedure....I mean, compiling a list of do's and dont's before you go out.....

[mca]

or make an elephant noise or something

Are you on ketamine mate?

[hippyted]

Why make such a science out of going out and enjoying yourself? In fact do you have time to enjoy yourself after you've gone through your procedure....I mean, compiling a list of do's and dont's before you go out.....

sounds like a secret stalker or summit

cant work like that?? if a bird makes me laugh and is as genuine as any female out there{ coz there all crafty cows} can be

then good i will take her on....

[nigelandjan]

Well blow me down !!!!!!! I wish you had posted this so I could have read it in its entirity before I married my Thai wife

[zorro1]

"1. Dulling the senses is the last thing id want to do in Thailand where u really need to have your wits about you."

troll or dummy? or dumb troll. NYC you need your wits about you. yeah you really got to be sober or you may end up buying a suit or heaven forbid 'Conned into an oil massage" possibly the silliest thread on TV congrats

[HerbalEd]

The following is my advice for meeting girls in Thailand, and its how i see things here. Its certainly not the only way to meet girls here, just how i do. Also bare in mind that im not a long term thailand veteran or anything. Ive spent around 6 weeks in Thailand in total, but the rules only ever change slightly - FACT.

These are guidelines only...

What a bunch of crap. You obviously know very little about Thailand and even less about Thai girls. And what a cheap Charlie .... I bet, even in BKK, you seldom get laid.

[stevehaigh]

i can't be bothered to read the whole of the OP but from what i read, why the f would any girl want to go out with you, unless you look like Brad Pitt or something, and even then, why? i'm not saying they are all hookers, far from it, but i doubt if there is a girl in Thailand (who is not already stinking rich) that does not want to see some cash or presents from a boy friend. its just cultural, girls expect to be taken care of.

[Travel2003]

A good and entertaining thread.

Dont know if the OP is arrogant, just naive (think most need his advice/guide lines), or if he is trolling.

After slaving through the first long post, all the responds he got made it worth reading it.

Yep, it indeed belong to the ...........Fun, entertainment......... Forum.

[oddhobbes]

Seriously funny thread. I am wondering why so many of you are reading this if you are NOT looking for advice. I myself, was checking whether this was part of the sect I expected it to be, and had quite some good laughs along the way. It is part of that sect, but I mean no disrespect, Christianity is a sect, and so is Buddhism, Capitalism, Communism and so on). Girls are the same everywhere, just the details change and it is very useful to know you need to be more careful in Thailand because the sex business is so much larger there.

When a guy tells you to wear a condom while strolling the park, be smart enough not to take it seriously. When he says that he doesn't collect belt markings, don't take that seriously either. I'd be willing to bet he lays more interesting ladies than 90% of you combined. And by interesting I mean exactly what was described (not ladyboys, not hookers [a drink for a elephant sound is not being a hooker or most girls and all guys would be hookers, you tell them that...], interested in you for your personality and not for the pictures of the King in your ceiling and the cash in your drawers). And they probably like him more for it too. As for the remaining 10%, well, you either speak proficient Thai and/or are lucky to be naturally good with women, but probably not very smart or you'd realize that you do the same things instinctively without having to think about it or plan it (in which case you'd shut the <deleted>** up). And I mean you're lucky because I'm not sure you'd be smart enough to understand and use the advice if you didn't have the right instincts.

For any ladies reading this thread, take a step back and ask yourself why it is that a girl will only buy a guy a drink if she's desperate or really really likes him? Think about why it is that a girl will rarely start a conversation with a guy, and usually places all the burden of starting the conversation on him. Try to see the sex wars from the other side, and I'm sure you'll realize this kind of advice balances the playing field a bit. I'm sure you don't like it when it's printed, but when it's done right, ohhh well, you will be obsessively asking your girlfriends why it is that this guy is acting so unpredictably different from all other guys and why you can't control him like you can the other losers. It's not about ego, but self-respect.

By the way, pardon the abuse, which really does not become me. But after so much one-sided insult I couldn't resist...

Steve, I appreciate the effort anyway, will make good use of it when I visit Southeast Asia