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A Hare Brained Idea


somluck

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He is my solution....bin the GF...problem solved...this your GF has some serious issues with control...grow a pair

Couldn't agree more, you need to be a man, you have children and they are entitled to see you and be part of your life.

What you are planning is cowardly, are you scared of this woman? it may pay to look for another.

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I will let on more since reading the more measured replies.

I have been caught with my hands in the cookie jar more than a few times, so to speak. I am partly responsible for my current gf's paranoid behaviour as I have betray her trust many times. And the ex wife is not making things easy for me so in a way I am between a rock and a hard place.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures that is why I have concoct up such a plan. I am also doing this mainly because I need/want to see my kids so please do not judge me. The topic at hand is how can I try to pull this off and not why I am doing it.

This is looking to be more difficult than it sounds, I will do a dry run soon. I am flying in reaching BKK around 11pm at night, I plan to hang around until after midnight (smoking area? duty free shopping? toilets?) before crossing customs (do the thai immigration change the passport date stamp exactly at 12midnight?) Then I will have around around 20 hours on my hands before i return to the airport to do the switcheroo the same evening. Wish me luck!

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Don't fly into Swampy. Fly to Phnom Penh, or similar, a few days before your scheduled arrival. Travel by road up to Bangkok, or wherever, and see your bin lids, sh@g the latest hot tottie and anything else you fancy. Bus back to PP, fly to Swampy on the actual day of your "arrival" arriving some time before your flight and hang around arrivals until the correct time and stroll through immigration.

Of course this will not work with checked in baggage, for that you'll have to hang around the baggage claim area and run the risk of being a suspect ne'er do well and being introduced to some special accommodation in Bangkok. Okay, if you get away with the hanging around bit, just hope she doesn't look too closely at your passport stamps and get some Kevlar kecks.

I'm not sure whether all this sounds very Ian Fleming-ish or Bean-esque but do keep us up to date it's certainly more fun than the "best hot dogs in Pattaya" threads. :)

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I will let on more since reading the more measured replies. ...

This is looking to be more difficult than it sounds, I will do a dry run soon. I am flying in reaching BKK around 11pm at night, I plan to hang around until after midnight (smoking area? duty free shopping? toilets?) before crossing customs (do the thai immigration change the passport date stamp exactly at 12midnight?) Then I will have around around 20 hours on my hands before i return to the airport to do the switcheroo the same evening. Wish me luck!

We should set up a rota to visit him in prison...

Wander~...

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I wonder how the OP's story about why he was hanging around Swampy, acting very strange, is going to fly when he finally gets before a judge. I doubt the staff at his embassy is going to buy it, also. Well, at least he has this thread to demonstrate that while his intentions are (as he says) hare-brained at least they're not dangerous.

Keep us posted! This thread is definitely more fun than the "best hamburger in Chiang Mai" threads.

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Somluck,

I havent tried what you are suggesting, but believe you are treading on rocky ground.

The real issue here is you being able to see your children, whats the crime there, perhaps its time to sit the gf down and discuss this with her and depending on the outcome of that discussing it may be time for you to seek a more understanding gf. Those children are most likely to benifit from having you in their lives, I wouldnt let any woman dictate those terms to me. Goodluck.

And not to automatically assume anything. Where's your girlfreinds Mama, kids, Elmo trainer and rural estate? I'll bet typically you

don't know her mothers name or her home address and phone number. If she lost her cell phone you wouldn't have a clue where to find her.

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Don't fly into Swampy. Fly to Phnom Penh, or similar, a few days before your scheduled arrival. Travel by road up to Bangkok, or wherever, and see your bin lids, sh@g the latest hot tottie and anything else you fancy. Bus back to PP, fly to Swampy on the actual day of your "arrival" arriving some time before your flight and hang around arrivals until the correct time and stroll through immigration.

Of course this will not work with checked in baggage, for that you'll have to hang around the baggage claim area and run the risk of being a suspect ne'er do well and being introduced to some special accommodation in Bangkok. Okay, if you get away with the hanging around bit, just hope she doesn't look too closely at your passport stamps and get some Kevlar kecks.

I'm not sure whether all this sounds very Ian Fleming-ish or Bean-esque but do keep us up to date it's certainly more fun than the "best hot dogs in Pattaya" threads. :)

International man of mystery :D

Austin Powers: Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Janis Joplin deceased, alcohol. Mama Cass deceased, ham sandwich!

Sorry... not hot dogs!

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No worries Mr Toady. :) I was of the same opinion as you, until the OP gave a bit more detail"

I will let on more since reading the more measured replies.

I have been caught with my hands in the cookie jar more than a few times, so to speak. I am partly responsible for my current gf's paranoid behaviour as I have betray her trust many times. And the ex wife is not making things easy for me so in a way I am between a rock and a hard place.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures that is why I have concoct up such a plan. I am also doing this mainly because I need/want to see my kids so please do not judge me. The topic at hand is how can I try to pull this off and not why I am doing it.

This is looking to be more difficult than it sounds, I will do a dry run soon. I am flying in reaching BKK around 11pm at night, I plan to hang around until after midnight (smoking area? duty free shopping? toilets?) before crossing customs (do the thai immigration change the passport date stamp exactly at 12midnight?) Then I will have around around 20 hours on my hands before i return to the airport to do the switcheroo the same evening. Wish me luck!

I know he requested not to be judged, but this IS a public forum, and well, what can one expect. I guess im stating the obvious and being rather unhelpful if i just say well the OP brought it on himself. Ultimately its wrong of the gf to try stop a father from seeing his kids, but shes better of walking away imo, than turning into a person she probably wouldnt want to be. This is just going to eat her up. This sneaking around malarky will probably come out at some point also, which will only exacerbate the feelings of distrust. Personally cant see how anyone would want to live this way.

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Your girlfriend needs a reality check, I presume she knew you had kids when she started seeing you and has to accept you must see them.

Tell her straight. These covert ideas are wrong and should not be necessary. Not allowing you to see the ex is onething, but you kids..come on!

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Honestly I think somluck has completely lost the plot. For what it's worth, I think he has essentially 2 choices:

1. Sit down with the GF and tell her what is and is not negotiable. What you did previously is in the past. It can't be undone. Now, both of you have to decide what you want moving forward. Certain things in life are subject to negotiation and compromise, and certain things aren't. All solutions begin with honesty. Perhaps the relationship is beyond saving, but if so, then more lying and deception is certainly not the answer.

If he doesn't want to do that, then:

2. Do not try this harebraned idea. Go ahead, hang out in the bathroom until midnight and proceed through immigration as usual. Before you completely exit the area, explain your situation to a helpful man in brown. Tell him that later on tonight you need to exit through the international arrivals gate. I wouldn't even bring up the kids. Nobody will believe you. Tell him you are meeting your GF now and your wife is expecting you this evening. Make sure it is a male officer you explain this to. (Sorry eek. Hope you understand.)

What you are looking for is an officer to escort you through the airport and out the arrivals gate. I would offer him about 5000 baht for this service. That is 1000 baht for him, and 4000 baht which is the going rate for VIP airport service from an immigration official. If he says no, you might bump up the offer. If he still says no, you're probably SOL, but it has alot more chance of success than the scheme you are plotting. And you won't have to worry about possibly standing in front of a judge or getting a cavity search. This is one time when rampant corruption in Thailand may be to your advantage. Use it.

Personally, I strongly recommend option #1. But if you are absolutely insistent on deception as a means through life, then option #2 is alot smarter than what you are attempting.

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Like everyone else has said, your idea seems like a whole lot of work and stress, and could get you in trouble in more ways than one. One big issue I see that hasn't really been addressed yet....your GF probably just has a problem with you "hanging out" with your ex-wife, not your kids! As you admitted, you've been "caught" in the past, so of course she's not going to trust you with this other lady who you had a long-term sexual relationship with. Why should she? You're going to have to do a lot to earn back that trust. Everyone keeps berating your GF about rejecting your children. But, have you talked to your GF about the options for seeing your children without much contact with your ex? My guess is that she wouldn't have a problem with this. Could you pick up the kids and bring them to your GF's house? Or take them to the mall or amusement park (with your GF, too)?

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The exact details are too complicated and personal for me to share. Would it be better if I said the premise that I am doing this is to get away some away time from the gf and meet up with a new hot chick that i have just met? Please dun judge me, I am just trying to find out if my idea can work.

Somluck, we don't need details to know that you are in a bad relationship. No one here would stand for a GF checking our passport, or being told that we can not see our own children. This is Thailand. Men here are in charge, men have the power. That is why most of us are here. Why would you put up with being treated worse, than you would be treated by a woman in your home country?

From my experience, I find that people that have no trust in others, can not be trusted themselves. Ask anyone that was ever cheated on, their partner was always the one that claimed they were being cheated on. Human thinking: If I do it, so does he. If I would do it, so would he. It doesn't matter in the slightest that you have been "caught" seeing your children before. There is no reason to try to hide seeing them, or any reason why you should hide it.

You have had many girl friends in your life, however, your children, will always be your children, no matter how many girlfriends you have.

Many people on this board have tried to get across to you that you are being abused. You are not seeing it. There isn't a man or woman on this board that has checked passport stamps on a partner. None of us would even think of not allowing a partner to see their own children. Grow some balls and get out of the relationship. Again, this is Thailand, you can replace your GF in a heart beat, and with someone better. You can replace her a whole lot easier than she can replace you. She knows that, we all know that, why don't you?

This woman is toxic. Your self-esteem and self worth is being effected. Get away NOW.

Second point: Airport security is not something to screw around with. They don't like it. I'm sure not going to give you ideas on an open board, on how to beat airport security. Terrorist can read also.

Deal with the real problem. A toxic relationship.

Edited by Lovedog100
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The exact details are too complicated and personal for me to share. Would it be better if I said the premise that I am doing this is to get away some away time from the gf and meet up with a new hot chick that i have just met? Please dun judge me, I am just trying to find out if my idea can work.

Somluck, we don't need details to know that you are in a bad relationship. No one here would stand for a GF checking our passport, or being told that we can not see our own children. This is Thailand. Men here are in charge, men have the power. That is why most of us are here.

Oh, so THAT's why? Because you don't feel powerful and manly enough in your own country where women will challenge you and stand up for themselves? Well, at least you are honest.

Although, I question the blanket statement that "men have the power" here. The women who milk thousands and thousands of baht out of their foreign boyfriends, while having Thai boyfriends on the side, seem to have a lot of power to me...the power to make their men think that they actually love them and think they're handsome. :) (And I know that this doesn't apply to ALL falang/Thai relationships.)

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LOL, in my country I don't find women wanting equality, they want superiority. Western women don't need a man. Many times I've heard western women say "any man can be replaced with a $10 viberator, and the vibrator is a lot easier to deal with" Thai ladies need men. Maybe that bothers you, but it's the way it is. Ask any single Thai woman what she wants most in life, and most will say "a good man to take care of me"

What country are you from Lovedog (you say "$" so America?). Most women i know enjoy having a balanced relationship with a man. Ive never heard a woman use the sentence about a vibrator that you gave. As for Thai Ladies needing men, well, actually, a lot of educated Thai women are putting off marriage and committing to a man because they enjoy their independence and dont wish to have a "traditional" relationship. So i disagree about all Thai women wanting a good man to take care of them.

Your example proves my point. Remember, I said "men have the power" Not Farang men have the power. In your example, the lady has to provide a service to the Farang, where the Farang feels he is getting his money's worth, and is happy. Then she has to give every Bht to the Thai boyfriend (with the exception of what she sends to mama) who sits home watching TV, playing cards, and drinking. Maybe he has two or three of these "girlfriends" supporting his lazy ass. He has the power to get what he wants, the Farang is getting what he wants. The poor lady just gets the work of trying to satisfying two men. By the way, that is twice as many as you are capable of doing.

I find this sentence a bit on the offensive side tbh, because its very stereotypical and one sided. I agree that Thailand is quite a male-dominated country (although that seems to me to be changing amongst the younger generation), but that doesnt mean that all Thai men sit and let women do all the work whilst all the women accept it all the whilst dreaming of men to take care of them...

Being in charge, and the power is what draws most Farang men here. Many will say it's the ladies, or the sex. But that is only possible because of the power of the man in Thailand. If you don't like it, you can try and change it. Good luck. The system seems to be working for everyone involved.

Where I come from, the divorce rate is above 50% and men are treated as second class citizens. For me, this is progress :)

Really? most Western men come here because of the feeling of being in charge and having a feeling of power? Well..thats interesting. I havent really gotten that "vibe" from my western male friends, but hey..you could be right.

"Many will say it's the ladies, or the sex. But that is only possible because of the power of the man in Thailand." I thought it was about the money, not the "power of man in Thailand". If a woman (of any nationality) has money, does she not then have the same "power"..?

"If you don't like it, you can try and change it. Good luck. The system seems to be working for everyone involved." Personally ive no need to change anything that you have mentioned, because i dont actually feel or have experienced any of what you have said.

"Where I come from, the divorce rate is above 50% and men are treated as second class citizens."

Well..im sorry that you experienced a feeling of being a second class citizen. But..from what you are saying, you are here because in a way you now like the feeling of women being second class citizens. Personally i prefer the feeling of people deserving mutual respect, regardless of their gender or origins.

Edited by eek
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Sorry about what I'm about to do...I haven't yet figured out how to split up a quote.

"LOL, in my country I don't find women wanting equality, they want superiority. Western women don't need a man. Many times I've heard western women say "any man can be replaced with a $10 vibrator, and the vibrator doesn't ask what times dinner ready" Thai ladies need men. Maybe that bothers you, but it's the way it is. Ask any single Thai woman what she wants most in life, and most will say "a good man to take care of me"

Nope, doesn't bother me at all. :) In my country, the women wouldn't want a man who needs to feel so much control and power anyway, so more power to you for being here. Less guys for us to weed out at home.

Your example proves my point. Remember, I said "men have the power" Not Farang men have the power. In your example, the lady has to provide a service to the Farang, where the Farang feels he is getting his money's worth, and is happy. Then she has to give every Bht to the Thai boyfriend (with the exception of what she sends to mama) who sits home watching TV, playing cards, and drinking. Maybe he has two or three of these "girlfriends" supporting his lazy ass. He has the power to get what he wants, the Farang is getting what he wants. The poor lady just gets the work of trying to satisfying two men. By the way, is twice as many as you are capable of doing.

Haha, so you're saying that at a falang woman, I am inherently incapable of satisfying one man? That's funny stuff.

Being in charge, and the power is what draws most Farang men here. Many will say it's the ladies, or the sex. But that is only possible because of the power of the man in Thailand. If you don't like it, you can try and change it. Good luck with that. The system seems to be working for everyone involved.

Again, I have no problem with the "system." I was just shocked, yet appreciative, that you actually came out and said that it's the power over women that draws men here, when so many other guys will say, "Oh, I just love the culture" or things like that.

Where I come from, the divorce rate is above 50% and men are treated as second class citizens. For me, this is progress :D

See, it sucks, doesn't it? I think it's funny that women (in many western countries) finally enjoy the same status as men have for ages, and now the guys are whining about it. :D

PS Glad you agreed with the rest of my post,,, that he is in a toxic relationship and needs to remove himself.

Conclusion: Guys who live in Thailand are happier here. Women who live in western countries are happy that you're here, too. Cheers!

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The general consensus is that the OP is flirting with legal problems, and that he should not allow his present g/f dictate his being able to see his children.  So further comments merely to tell him to "grow a pair" and so on would be redundant and will be deleted.  

Additionally, this thread is not about western women, so further attempts to cast them somehow in a negative light as a group will result in additional warnings and possible suspensions.

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