A Boring Morning

Sunday, I decided to go and be a total nerd and buy computer parts. A bit of a hobby.

ok, did all that and got home to find my wife in shock and police everywhere. I thought it a bit strange to see a falang at the front of my condo being put in a police car - red light and all, already cuffed. Well Sunday morning I thought, and found out later the Falang was the boyfriend of my ex- wou came to serve me with a lein. I was expecting the papers, as she was going to buy a boat for the kids.

What eventuated was "Steve" decided he wanted to tell me what a "Bad man" I was, but I was out. He didn't believe my wife nor did he bother to call me until he was in the IDC. What he decided to do was give my wife a smack after an argument. My wife is 40kg ringing wet he would be more than 100kg, the neighbours saw and heard it all, and called security.

Security realised it wasn't me and got the sleepy police from doenstairs. They then returned the compliment in the lift foyer.

I walked in the door trying to console my wife when the phone rings from Australia with the ex- telling me to help Steve....... Not my problem not my story.

So like any good ex- usband whose ex-wife's b/f gets himself into trouble _ I did the Thai thing, and stopped my telephone.

About 30 minutes later, I get a call on my home phone, and now the ex- is more polite and happy to pay ALL expenses. I told her sorry and I had to go to work (a total lie), and I can't help, but I gave her my (dodgy) lawyers phone number.

Another 15 minutes, and now the ex- is also happy to pay me for my time as well, she can't understand the Lawyer (I hardly can, nor can my wife - she is Thai), Ok, so I told her that I would lose 30,000 baht, in income and fines, as it was an important day. She agreed.

To cut this short, he had to pay me the 30k, my wife got 25k the Lawyre got 25k and the police got 10k, Steve got a stamp in the observations page in his passport and an escort back to the airport.

We all had a good laugh. When I asked the "Jewell of Issan" how she was, "oh fine" was her response - he missed me and got where the door open - I think his hand jeb for sure"

While we enjoyed a nice night out as "steve" never got released until his ATM and credit cards were purged via the ATM placed just near the IDC, I started humming "som-num-na" to the tune of "Oh my darling clementine"

Sadly, I don't think Steve will be coming back for a holiday, after the Big stamp from the IDC.