What Is A Fair Amount To Give Your Lady

[Dakhar]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

It kindof depends on her debt and budget before she met you. For example, lets say she had a car note of 5K a month, and she always sent 5K a month toher parents before she met u. Now she meets you, you request that she quits her lousy job of lousy pay and crazy long hours, so she can spend time with you, take care of you, help you when needed, etc etc.

But how is she going to pay for the car and her parents, if she quits her job? So then you need to fork out 10K for her previous obligations & then you need to fork out more just for daily life etc etc. (at least this is how I see it)

If you don't need her around so much or don't care to have her around so much, then let her work & don't pay her any thing.

But again, I guess this also depends on what type of "work" we are talking about....

Good luck to all of us....

[ttthailand]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

It kindof depends on her debt and budget before she met you. For example, lets say she had a car note of 5K a month, and she always sent 5K a month toher parents before she met u. Now she meets you, you request that she quits her lousy job of lousy pay and crazy long hours, so she can spend time with you, take care of you, help you when needed, etc etc.

But how is she going to pay for the car and her parents, if she quits her job? So then you need to fork out 10K for her previous obligations & then you need to fork out more just for daily life etc etc. (at least this is how I see it)

If you don't need her around so much or don't care to have her around so much, then let her work & don't pay her any thing.

But again, I guess this also depends on what type of "work" we are talking about....

Good luck to all of us....

How much more for her daily life etc ??? This is getting to the main part of the question , how much to give her for her daily life etc etc ... After her fixed expenses are paid.

[robblok]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

The guys that i know dont pay their gf a dime actually most of those girls share in the costs of living. But im talking here about guys who are neither old nor far or ugly. The girls and guys are in the same age bracket and the girls have their own income.

I think it all depends on what kind of group you hang out with. Also if your less attractive then your gf and she is drop dead gorgous then yes its normal you pay. Just look at all the old Thais with the young gf's they pay too. Its the norm here for old unattractive guys to pay their gf's. Nothing wrong with that but dont expect it to be love.

Sure there are exceptions.. but not many.

[sharking]

The way some guys are spending money is what is creating the problems we later see when many pretty girls start demanding it - since they know that there are so many guys out there that will do it...

You guys have lost the plot. Because you all get carried away with the bg thing you don't really understand the question.

Let's say it is your wife... If you leave the country , say to work or long visit to home country, how much would you give you WIFE each month to live on ?

Now ..the second question is, If you are in country how much spending money would you give he each month. ( lets say for now she does not work)

am back in the UK.for a little while,i send my wife 21,000baht 11,100 baht for loan of the pick up,thus 9,900baht for her,yes she wanted more dosh,but i said no why

house payed for

motor bikes payed for

we grow are own veg

we also grow our rice,and we have plenty of that

have plenty of fish in our 3 ponds

and have an abundance of fruit trees

and not forgetting all of the spices we grow

so plenty of food there

but after all of this she will still go and buy food,lunch time soup 25baht,tea time average 30 to 40 baht

as for out going

electricity 900 baht a mouth

pick up i pay for

petrol motorbike 100baht a week

diesel pick up well she don't need to go too the city as am not home,and it was only my food we bought there

as for her parents i never give them anything as why should i,i don't give my mother any money,and her parents have more land and two houses and there not starving or poor

and as the average wage is about 8,000baht a mouth why should i pay more

when am back home in Thailand,we share MY money if she wants she gets if i want i get

SHARKING AROUND EARNING MONEY

[meom]

How much more for her daily life etc ??? This is getting to the main part of the question , how much to give her for her daily life etc etc ... After her fixed expenses are paid.

That's all up to you.

My wife used to give me 500 baht a day. She thought that was a fair amount to get me through the day. That was 15 years ago and obviously things are more expensive nowadays so now she's happy to give me 1200-1500/day.

[ihunnieibee]

I'm wondering where can I get a set-up like this....

Easy... you have to look good .. then go work in a bar look for a guy double your age not too handsome who has money. Then tell him you love him and want to stop working in the bar but need money. Some will say no but eventually you will find one with half a brain who says yes.

Now to find a bar that hires farang girls hahaah

but seriously...a lot of my Thai girl friends have all their things paid for by their boyfriends and they either A. don't work, or B. have a really low paying job but they have every possible thing they could ever desire (the best phone, clothes, jewelry, tons of cash to go out with...), i'm somewhat jealous actually......and one of my friends he is like 19 and has a 23 yr old girlfriend..he has paid off all her debts from her credit cards (over 200,000 baht)...and pays for everything for her.... i just seriously wanna know what kind of manipulation goes into this lol....

p.s. I would consider myself pretty good-looking and I'm in my mid-twenties so don't think this comment is coming from some old/fat/ugly bitter farang girl - i just don't see how they can do it!!

Regarding: ".... how they can do it"

40 kilos & a 32C results may vary

Oh ...Well there is no way I could ever weigh 40kilos... I'm 174cm & 52kg ..I think I might die if i tried to be 40kg >.< o well.. at least I know now the answer to that "how they can do it?" question..thank u lol

[ttthailand]

Thank you for the advise. Perhaps the 10,000 baht figure is something to consider. Her mama and papa are a little old and don't have too much so perhaps a little extra is good to throw in, it is afterall the Thai way to take care of mama and papa when they are old. As you pointed out ,too much money causes problems. She will then not think I am buying her and be free to express her true feelings. If she needs more money she can go to work.

[Travel2003]

Beginning to think it's a TROLL post. We do not know who he is, he does not know who we are, so he can answer ALL the questions to provide a responce to his questions, OR he's pissed off that she is probably taking him for a ride and doesn't want to face OUR facts.

I think you might be right.

He talks about the amount of 30 000 in another post, some time back.

Oh, and he is engaged.

I think that changes the entire ball game.

[thomo]

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

Pure

And utter

Nonsense.

There may not be many 50 yr old+ farangs with girlfriends half their age, perhaps.

[robblok]

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

Pure

And utter

Nonsense.

There may not be many 50 yr old+ farangs with girlfriends half their age, perhaps.

Yes that amount would drasticly lower Normal guys with normal girls.. no that would stay the same.

[cardholder]

I don't give my Thai Lady (my wife of 15 + a few more years) any money, as she has access to OUR joint account and can take when she requires money! ;)

Then she is luckier than the OP´s partner.

[somtampet]

I would not pay for a girl because i would feel like i would be buying love. I would never be sure if she stayed with me for the money or for me. I could not live with the fact someone would only be with me for the money.

Others might not have a problem with that but i like to be liked because of who i am, how i look and act and not about how much i pay a girl. Also if a girl has her own source of income the relation is much more equal.

There are however exceptions to what i am saying, some guys are retired and want their gf to be with them all the time and then they cant work. I can understand that a bit.

But paying a bar girl to stay with you doesn't sound like a smart option to me

hi rob,

where does it say he is with a bargirl????

[robblok]

I would not pay for a girl because i would feel like i would be buying love. I would never be sure if she stayed with me for the money or for me. I could not live with the fact someone would only be with me for the money.

Others might not have a problem with that but i like to be liked because of who i am, how i look and act and not about how much i pay a girl. Also if a girl has her own source of income the relation is much more equal.

There are however exceptions to what i am saying, some guys are retired and want their gf to be with them all the time and then they cant work. I can understand that a bit.

But paying a bar girl to stay with you doesn't sound like a smart option to me

hi rob,

where does it say he is with a bargirl????

The pattaya factor,and it was just a general remark that paying a bar girl to stay with you is not a good thing to do.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Can I just state my appreciation for this topic.. I'm thoroughly enjoying it.

Couldn't come up with more condensed stereotypes all around if I tried..

Anyway, as stated by the OP, she was working before (in Pattaya) but not now. So keep paying her whatever her typical income was plus a little extra. 20K may very well not cover it, depending how successful she was career-wise. If she was working before but not now then clearly she's expected to give up a career; just like when headhunting anyone else anywhere else, you're expected to pay a bit more than what she was previously making. Note that the extra could also be providing insurance or other benefits. Including 'not working 50% of the time'.

Edited July 29, 2010 by WinnieTheKhwai

[powderpuff]

Why does she need to pay rent one month & not the next?

Here's the drill pal.

You pay all the bills every month & give her 10k pocket (walking around) money.

It doesn't get simpler than this.

[zzaa09]

I don't give my Thai Lady (my wife of 15 + a few more years) any money, as she has access to OUR joint account and can take when she requires money! ;)

That's how we approach it. All funds and monies are ours. As we have a number of income diversities - business, work, farms, etc. Actually, I comfortable with having her look after all daily expenses and what whatnot......if I'm of the need for some pocket change, I just ask the boss:rolleyes:. I believe that you'll find that this type of arrangement is more common than not. Situations differ, of course. Makes good sense to approach this manner above if one is an absent-tee or part-time resident. But other lifestyles are real and solid as year-round everyday living and residency.

[TAWP]

The way some guys are spending money is what is creating the problems we later see when many pretty girls start demanding it - since they know that there are so many guys out there that will do it...

You guys have lost the plot. Because you all get carried away with the bg thing you don't really understand the question.

Let's say it is your wife... If you leave the country , say to work or long visit to home country, how much would you give you WIFE each month to live on ?

Now ..the second question is, If you are in country how much spending money would you give he each month. ( lets say for now she does not work)

Outside the country, would depend on salary and length of being away. But in the past i would have said 'not much at all, tell her that I have the money when I get back'.

Most can work if they really want/need to.

If in the country...why give any money in the hand?

Are you dating a kid? Giving them an allowance?

[NanLaew]

The pattaya factor,and it was just a general remark that paying a bar girl to stay with you is not a good thing to do.

Oh yes it is!

[Garry9999]

There is no fair amount or standard, it's entirely up to you.

[dmax]

depends on how much you can afford, 20-000 baht a mth is plenty for her while your away, while your here with her i wouldnt give her anything!! you allready pay for everything she needs so why give her more, if she asks for more she is just being greedy !!

[Beardog]

20,000 baht + perdiem is quite generous. My girl gets 5000 baht a month to spend on whatever. She busts her ass on 2 rai we have & is more of an asset to me giving her some pocket change than having her work. It would cost me more in labor to tend our gardens. Although it may seem low I just built a beautiful pad that she will wind up with if we break up. Nearly 7 years already. But hey it is the same in the U.S. when the rides over you usually are taking a hit in the monetary dept. Only difference the house no matter how awesome it is , Is but a fraction of the loss compared to the states! And there was a time while I was waiting on funds for 3 months I didn't have but 2000 to sprank her pocket change. If you are the one giving & she isn't demanding the funds & you are comfortable with it, go for it.The key factor for me is if the girl is fleecing you for the funds as she might have a spare hubby + countless giks to boot that she is also working -or possibly spending your funds on her Thai boyfriends. only you know your situation & you are the one to make your call.

I know if she made a high number for me to pay (being around the Pattaya area) They only average 5000-7000 baht a month & have to pay their own expenses normally for a good girl. Now if it is a bar girl Good Luck your gonna need it.

[imaneggspurt]

I don't give my Thai Lady (my wife of 15 + a few more years) any money, as she has access to OUR joint account and can take when she requires money! ;)

I agree, i trust mine ( 10 years together, and she earns good money herself ) and she also has access to my ( our ) bank account, im sorry but when i read these topics like this it reads like a rental, or asking how much to pay to keep her around,.

[ttthailand]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

The guys that i know dont pay their gf a dime actually most of those girls share in the costs of living. But im talking here about guys who are neither old nor far or ugly. The girls and guys are in the same age bracket and the girls have their own income.

I think it all depends on what kind of group you hang out with. Also if your less attractive then your gf and she is drop dead gorgous then yes its normal you pay. Just look at all the old Thais with the young gf's they pay too. Its the norm here for old unattractive guys to pay their gf's. Nothing wrong with that but dont expect it to be love.

Sure there are exceptions.. but not many.

I understand the concept about not paying your gf any money, and there are many positive points about not doing so. I also understand that some guys have girls waiting in line to live with them. Well...I am 20 +years older then her, I think most girls would say for looks I am about an 8 or 9 (1 to10), build about an 8 or 9, very fun to be with and I work as a professional. I speak some Thai, not great but she thinks it is. So perhaps I could tell her to get a job and not give her any money. Would she stay ,maybe.... maybe not. On the other hand, what is wrong with providing an income, maybe an additional income, to help her move up to a higher standard of living. She can then save some money, buy some nice things, perhaps upgrade her toys ( phone, computer etc) and who knows maybe go to college or get some other advanced education. This is the woman I love and perhaps someday marry. I understand that maybe I am being taken for a ride, it is possible. I also understand that perhaps if I am not a cheep Charlie this girl may just turn into the girl of my dreams. If at some point it looks like it is only about the money then hopefully I can be wise enough to spot it and take the necessary action...broken heart... So based on this and all the other information I already gave...what is a fair amount ?

[ttthailand]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

The guys that i know dont pay their gf a dime actually most of those girls share in the costs of living. But im talking here about guys who are neither old nor far or ugly. The girls and guys are in the same age bracket and the girls have their own income.

I think it all depends on what kind of group you hang out with. Also if your less attractive then your gf and she is drop dead gorgous then yes its normal you pay. Just look at all the old Thais with the young gf's they pay too. Its the norm here for old unattractive guys to pay their gf's. Nothing wrong with that but dont expect it to be love.

Sure there are exceptions.. but not many.

I understand the concept about not paying your gf any money, and there are many positive points about not doing so. I also understand that some guys have girls waiting in line to live with them. Well...I am 20 +years older then her, I think most girls would say for looks I am about an 8 or 9 (1 to10), build about an 8 or 9, very fun to be with and I work as a professional. I speak some Thai, not great but she thinks it is. So perhaps I could tell her to get a job and not give her any money. Would she stay ,maybe.... maybe not. On the other hand, what is wrong with providing an income, maybe an additional income, to help her move up to a higher standard of living. She can then save some money, buy some nice things, perhaps upgrade her toys ( phone, computer etc) and who knows maybe go to college or get some other advanced education. This is the woman I love and perhaps someday marry. I understand that maybe I am being taken for a ride, it is possible. I also understand that perhaps if I am not a cheep Charlie this girl may just turn into the girl of my dreams. If at some point it looks like it is only about the money then hopefully I can be wise enough to spot it and take the necessary action...broken heart... So based on this and all the other information I already gave...what is a fair amount ?

[shamus]

ttthailand - Give her everything

Well if you have to ask some strangers on an internet forum you'll get to that stage sooner or later, might as well make it sooner...

Edited July 29, 2010 by shamus

[robblok]

The guys that i know dont pay their gf a dime actually most of those girls share in the costs of living. But im talking here about guys who are neither old nor far or ugly. The girls and guys are in the same age bracket and the girls have their own income.

I think it all depends on what kind of group you hang out with. Also if your less attractive then your gf and she is drop dead gorgous then yes its normal you pay. Just look at all the old Thais with the young gf's they pay too. Its the norm here for old unattractive guys to pay their gf's. Nothing wrong with that but dont expect it to be love.

Sure there are exceptions.. but not many.

I understand the concept about not paying your gf any money, and there are many positive points about not doing so. I also understand that some guys have girls waiting in line to live with them. Well...I am 20 +years older then her, I think most girls would say for looks I am about an 8 or 9 (1 to10), build about an 8 or 9, very fun to be with and I work as a professional. I speak some Thai, not great but she thinks it is. So perhaps I could tell her to get a job and not give her any money. Would she stay ,maybe.... maybe not. On the other hand, what is wrong with providing an income, maybe an additional income, to help her move up to a higher standard of living. She can then save some money, buy some nice things, perhaps upgrade her toys ( phone, computer etc) and who knows maybe go to college or get some other advanced education. This is the woman I love and perhaps someday marry. I understand that maybe I am being taken for a ride, it is possible. I also understand that perhaps if I am not a cheep Charlie this girl may just turn into the girl of my dreams. If at some point it looks like it is only about the money then hopefully I can be wise enough to spot it and take the necessary action...broken heart... So based on this and all the other information I already gave...what is a fair amount ?

There is a difference between giving her the tools to become better (like funding her education of shop) then to make her monetary dependent on you. I would say spend money on her education, that could be money well spent. I would not have a problem paying for my gf education. I even suggested it to her that she should do some post uni education. But she smiled and said she did not want it. So I wont force it on her.

[ttthailand]

ttthailand - Give her everything

Well if you have to ask some strangers on an internet forum you'll get to that stage sooner or later, might as well make it sooner...

Why would I give her everything....I understand your point !

What is wrong asking if there is some standard ( maybe not the best word) that farang go by. I have heard ...don't give her anything...give her 30,000....give her 10,000.... give her what you want... give her everything. All responses have been welcome and some point out warning about being taken advantage of. This is helpful ! The 10,000 suggestion along with possible work is the way I am thinking at this time.

[shamus]

Apologies for being a bit of a tool.

Let's get serious.

The best suggestion I have read is to give her an amount for a few months then for some reason reduce it. See what the reaction is. It sounds like you don't hold her in position of trust to let her have your bank details and by doing what I suggest you are confirming you are the devious one to some extent but I don't see another way. Love is blind and trust has cost lots of people on this site a lot of Baht.

Good luck

[sharking]

70 replys i think you sould know by now

[chickenslegs]

A lot of posters insisting that this girl needs to get a job.

Well, good luck to her in finding a job where she can work one month on and one month off (to coincide with the OP's work pattern) so she can spend time with her b/f when he gets off the rig.

I can only think of one occupation which would make that possible - but, unlike other posters, I don't believe that every girl you meet in Pattaya is a prostitute.

OP - It's your money, you work hard to get it, spend it on things that give you pleasure. If it pleases you to have your g/f available to spend time with you when you're on leave, then you will need to give her money to live on. If it pleases you to give her a lifestyle she may not have had without you, then give her that lifestyle.

Regarding the amount - 20,000 seems like a decent (but not overly generous) amount for a single girl, it won't buy her a Benz or a new condo, but it will give her the lifestyle of a girl who has a b/f on the rigs.

However, the lifestyle of a a girl who has a husband on the rigs is much more expensive - so take care.