What Is A Fair Amount To Give Your Lady

[phuketrichard]

why does everyone assume she is a bar girl? He never said she was but we all know she must be otherwise she would not be with him , right?

If she can work and make 8-10,000 is that "real" work if so why did she stop?

Good salary for a girl with college degree in the tourism sector is 10-15,000/month

HS education 6-10,000

[pcruzer]

find another lady...there are millions of them...when it gets to pay time switch again...

[Thakkar]

Sometimes when I break a thousand baht note I will give my wife a couple of hundreds (mad money I guess). If I ask her if she wants more she generally says "no, if you give it to me I will spend it". I also give her money to pay the bills (she really nags about bills).

If she wants something I buy it for her, usually we shop together. We seem to be happy.

Don't you know for sure?

With quite a lot of couples in East Asia, and in Thailand, it's common for the husband to give his salary to the wife and keep an allowance for himself. In my family, we don't even have separate accounts. We both make money and we both spend sensibly, withdrawing money as needed. For big ticket items, we consult each other and make a joint decision.

I know for sure

Good to know

But do also read post number 108 from Sarahsbloke.

[canuckamuck]

Sometimes when I break a thousand baht note I will give my wife a couple of hundreds (mad money I guess). If I ask her if she wants more she generally says "no, if you give it to me I will spend it". I also give her money to pay the bills (she really nags about bills).

If she wants something I buy it for her, usually we shop together. We seem to be happy.

Don't you know for sure?

With quite a lot of couples in East Asia, and in Thailand, it's common for the husband to give his salary to the wife and keep an allowance for himself. In my family, we don't even have separate accounts. We both make money and we both spend sensibly, withdrawing money as needed. For big ticket items, we consult each other and make a joint decision.

I know for sure

Good to know

But do also read post number 108 from Sarahsbloke.

.

Well I could plead my case here, but I assume the jury is the hangin kind. So I guess you can either believe me or don't. I won't care either way

[ttthailand]

why does everyone assume she is a bar girl? He never said she was but we all know she must be otherwise she would not be with him , right?

If she can work and make 8-10,000 is that "real" work if so why did she stop?

Good salary for a girl with college degree in the tourism sector is 10-15,000/month

HS education 6-10,000

She quit her job which was not very good and the hours late so her and I could spend more time together. It was my request but she was ok with it. She went to high school and is pretty smart. She is willing to go back to work anytime. Maybe in a few months we will look at her return to the workforce. When I am working out of country she travels upcountry to visit family. Her and I are also thinking about taking English and Thai classes so we can communicate better, another reason not to work right now.

[Thakkar]

Canuckamuck said:

Sometimes when I break a thousand baht note I will give my wife a couple of hundreds (mad money I guess). If I ask her if she wants more she generally says "no, if you give it to me I will spend it". I also give her money to pay the bills (she really nags about bills).

If she wants something I buy it for her, usually we shop together. We seem to be happy.

Don't you know for sure?

With quite a lot of couples in East Asia, and in Thailand, it's common for the husband to give his salary to the wife and keep an allowance for himself. In my family, we don't even have separate accounts. We both make money and we both spend sensibly, withdrawing money as needed. For big ticket items, we consult each other and make a joint decision.

I know for sure

Good to know

But do also read post number 108 from Sarahsbloke.

.

Well I could plead my case here, but I assume the jury is the hangin kind. So I guess you can either believe me or don't. I won't care either way

I do believe you. And you're right to not care. However I do care. Whether it's in a room or a village, I'd much rather be surrounded by happy people than not. Thank you for the ripple of good vibes your happiness sends my way.

[robblok]

Well I could plead my case here, but I assume the jury is the hangin kind. So I guess you can either believe me or don't. I won't care either way

Rope... check

Victim (eh i mean accused) .... check

Gallows (Thai visa).... check

audience... check

Yep looks that all that is needed is here already

If you say your happy i have to believe you you are a far better judge of it then me.

[carmine]

How much to pay your lady is always a difficult one isn't it. Can't spoil em but at the same time keep em one their toes.

Really, i think it all comes down to their hard work and diligence. Do they spend the kind of hours in the kitchen to perform their culinery skills at peak of their ability? If i think she's slacking i'm not shy of telling her to "get back in that kitchen"

Are your shirts ironed nicely?

I for one like my car washed once a week and a quick vacuum around the interior. I look for the signs of her going that extra yard, cos theres always a lonely old motorbike in need of a scrub too right?

If she's on the ball theres always a little extra in the house keeping money so she can go and treat herself to something nice.

[Briggsy]

"How much should you give your Thai Lady each month. I spend 50% or more of my time working out of the country. When I am in Thailand I pay for everything, food, rent and everything else. I currently give her 20,000 baht a month. When I am not there she needs to pay her rent and internet,, about 3600 baht. The rest is for her to spend and perhaps give some to mama and papa. Should I give her the same amount when I am in country or just pay for everything and reduce the amount. I know this issue has had to be discussed before but I could not find."

Note the lexicon of the OP picked up, no doubt, during in-Thailand discourse. Also note the cultural habits. I have highlighted these 3 examples. These markers are highly specific to the professional girlfriend/prostitute catering to the westerner social grouping.

In answer to the OP's question, I routinely work with Thais grinding out 48 hours a week in a factory for 6,000 Baht a month.

[Thakkar]

How much to pay your lady is always a difficult one isn't it. Can't spoil em but at the same time keep em one their toes.

Really, i think it all comes down to their hard work and diligence. Do they spend the kind of hours in the kitchen to perform their culinery skills at peak of their ability? If i think she's slacking i'm not shy of telling her to "get back in that kitchen"

Are your shirts ironed nicely?

I for one like my car washed once a week and a quick vacuum around the interior. I look for the signs of her going that extra yard, cos theres always a lonely old motorbike in need of a scrub too right?

If she's on the ball theres always a little extra in the house keeping money so she can go and treat herself to something nice.

I like to keep her in roller blades so she can get to her chores and bring me my beer chop-chop quick like.

And what's with the extra money, you're getting soft, Carmine. Give 'em a finger, they take a hand. Next thing you know she'll want medical. Stop ruining it for the rest of us, these danm women talk you know.

[Hardie]

Personally this topic has gone beyond tired & boring almost to the point of grotesque & disgusting, but it still reminds me of the mine-field most of us must tread in trying to have semblance of a normal relationship with Thais and/or Thailand, and as such I feel like I should toss in a few baht’s worth of opinion just in the hope that someone who asked an honest question might not only get an honest answer, but maybe get the genuine help he seems to want. He said nothing about his ‘lady’ being a whore or bar-girl, so I’ll assume she’s not. If she is, then may God help you, because I can’t. Anybody who considers time spent with such women a ‘relationship’ is beyond hope.

Having said that, a couple facts are quickly evident. 1) Though it is far less necessary for a husband in the West to support his partner, given the uneven incomes, it’s still a factor, and I’m sure any self-respecting CEO would share the wealth with his wife, regardless of how hard she works in the kitchen… or the bedroom. 2) It is traditional for children to support their parents in SE Asia and elsewhere, since they- unlike in the West- usually have less $ than the kids and no social safety net. This is changing, of course, but only slowly. 3) Thailand is largely a pre-literate society (okay, I’m exaggerating) and simply ‘turning over the purse strings’ (or worse, the credit card) to someone who’s never even written a check is a bit of a dicey proposition. 4) We all want to be loved for who/what we are, but that sentiment works both ways, i.e. Nok doesn’t want to be kitchen help any more than John wants to be sugar daddy.

Bottom line, I think giving an allowance to a local non-Western partner- Thai, Peruvian, Ghanaian, whatever- is fine, and anywhere between 10-20,000 baht seems about right to me, depending on particulars- man’s income, children, parents, marriage status, length of relationship, etc. Thai society has been so corrupted by the ‘entertainment industry’ that the vocabulary and instant gratification it offers have penetrated to all levels, so any return to a pure state of Nature is unrealistic. I suggest learning the language to mitigate the differences. Good luck out there.

[tracer5050]

If you can afford it give her what she needs , The big question is are you happy.

[Loz]

No, the big question is, what does she give you? and is it worth it? For most here the answers seem to be:

"What I want"

and

"For now"

respectively.

[dannyman]

WHO GIVES A <deleted> !

[Dakhar]

Think I may have met her as well, couldnt understand a word she said, she appears to have difficulty talking with her mouth full.

Yep, thats the one.

Is this that girl that is ambidextrous and was wearing an eye patch a few weeks back? She said the eye patch had some thing about an un-expected gusher or a geyser....

I don't know I am not sure, she was talking with her mouth full & I honestly wasn't very interested

[Rimmer]

One inflammatory post deleted

[BRichards]

When the servant becomes your master.

[freddy]

Currently my Thai wife earns 30,000 Baht per month and gives me 24,000 baht towards the family expenses keeping just 6,000 Baht for herself, kind of a role reversal to the norm. We have been together a long time (nearly 19 years) and have a child so fairs fair!!!

[Werfer]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

[F1fanatic]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

That's wonderful. Does she pay 50% of all the bills (rent, elec, water etc.)?

[DragonQuest]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

That's wonderful. Does she pay 50% of all the bills (rent, elec, water etc.)?

[DragonQuest]

(post deleted)

Edited August 3, 2010 by bonobo
deleted flame

[MAJIC]

Is the OP's lady his girlfriend or his wife?

If wife, then the whole question about how much he gives just stupid.

If she is his girlfriend, then I ask if he also paid his previous girlfriends back where he comes from.

So, for all the farang out there with Thai girlfriends none of them should give their girlfriend any money. And how long have you lived in Thailand ? I think that there would be few farang with girlfriends.

I can't think of one of my farang friends who has not , at least in the beginning, provided some kind of support to their girlfriends.

In this case the girl is not currently working so additional funds are required. Lets put another possible spin on the matter and say that perhaps I don't want her to work.

The question still remain the same..What is a fair amount to give your lady...for support when you are out of country and how much when you are here.

The guys that i know dont pay their gf a dime actually most of those girls share in the costs of living. But im talking here about guys who are neither old nor far or ugly. The girls and guys are in the same age bracket and the girls have their own income.

I think it all depends on what kind of group you hang out with. Also if your less attractive then your gf and she is drop dead gorgous then yes its normal you pay. Just look at all the old Thais with the young gf's they pay too. Its the norm here for old unattractive guys to pay their gf's. Nothing wrong with that but dont expect it to be love.

Sure there are exceptions.. but not many.

Typical Youthful inexperienced comment.

Come back and tell us about it,when your checkbill comes in,

as it surely will.

[ttthailand]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

Ugly Thai women stay with their boyfriends for free to keep their boyfriend's illusions alive.

[sarahsbloke]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

Ugly Thai women stay with their boyfriends for free to keep their boyfriend's illusions alive.

This is so true, attractive Thai ladies want keeping, ugly Thai ladies want a boyfriend/husband.

As one Thai lady said to me

"You chase pretty girls and will always have trouble, pretty girls have many options and behave badly, you need girl like me."

(she was not at all pretty)

When someone boasts how he never gives his girl any money, I get an instant image of what they look like in my mind. Maybe you should post a photo of the lady, when you say how much/little you give.I've never noticed that an ugly man or old man pays more, seems entirely dependent on the looks of the lady.

Edited August 3, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[robblok]

This is so true, attractive Thai ladies want keeping, ugly Thai ladies want a boyfriend/husband.

As one Thai lady said to me

"You chase pretty girls and will always have trouble, pretty girls have many options and behave badly, you need girl like me."

(she was not at all pretty)

When someone boasts how he never gives his girl any money, I get an instant image of what they look like in my mind. Maybe you should post a photo of the lady, when you say how much/little you give.I've never noticed that an ugly man or old man pays more, seems entirely dependent on the looks of the lady.

I will have to disagree, it depends on the looks of the lady compared to the guy. If this was not true why is it that normal young Thais and normal young farang have super sexy gf's and they don't pay. The uglier or more handicapped (mentally and physically) you are the more you pay. But if you have an ugly girl then the difference gets smaller and you pay less. (the less the difference is the less chances there are for her to find better)

And I share all cost with the wife she pays 40% of electricity, mortgage, internet, car ect. I pay most of the food and the other 60%. Because i have a deal like that according to your theory my wife would be one of the ugliest ones around. Maybe she is ugly most people say she is not and she got a facebook full of people saying she is not. But it all depends what you like in a girl. Talking about beauty is kinda hard its just like talking about food one person likes this an other does not.

But i think we can all agree that an overweight guy with a belly and sagging body is not handsome compared to a guy in the prime of his life (early 20's).

[canuckamuck]

I give my girl what see needs not a red cent more, I am actually respected more for my stance. Old ugly dudes pay out their ass to keep the illusion alive.

Ugly Thai women stay with their boyfriends for free to keep their boyfriend's illusions alive.

This is so true, attractive Thai ladies want keeping, ugly Thai ladies want a boyfriend/husband.

As one Thai lady said to me

"You chase pretty girls and will always have trouble, pretty girls have many options and behave badly, you need girl like me."

(she was not at all pretty)

When someone boasts how he never gives his girl any money, I get an instant image of what they look like in my mind. Maybe you should post a photo of the lady, when you say how much/little you give.I've never noticed that an ugly man or old man pays more, seems entirely dependent on the looks of the lady.

Lol

If pretty is what you are paying for, there are a lot of guys out there that should apply for a refund.

[robblok]

If pretty is what you are paying for, there are a lot of guys out there that should apply for a refund.

Good one mate, but the guys just have to justify paying their gf's off because they are too repulsive to stay with for free.

Look at it being extra money for a girl for hazardous work or dirty work.

p.s you begging for rep worked.

Edited August 3, 2010 by robblok

[imaneggspurt]

Were talking about bar girls/prostitutes right ?..if not pay them bugger all and tell em to get a job,, if your "girl" stops working for you, then YOU become the employer, wages, as they say "up to you " ( your paying )

[ttthailand]

This is so true, attractive Thai ladies want keeping, ugly Thai ladies want a boyfriend/husband.

As one Thai lady said to me

"You chase pretty girls and will always have trouble, pretty girls have many options and behave badly, you need girl like me."

(she was not at all pretty)

When someone boasts how he never gives his girl any money, I get an instant image of what they look like in my mind. Maybe you should post a photo of the lady, when you say how much/little you give.I've never noticed that an ugly man or old man pays more, seems entirely dependent on the looks of the lady.

I will have to disagree, it depends on the looks of the lady compared to the guy. If this was not true why is it that normal young Thais and normal young farang have super sexy gf's and they don't pay. The uglier or more handicapped (mentally and physically) you are the more you pay. But if you have an ugly girl then the difference gets smaller and you pay less. (the less the difference is the less chances there are for her to find better)

I think it depends on where they first met, what she does for a living, how old she is, if she has kids, etc etc.. If she is over 26 and worked the bar for a few years she may be ready to get out and look for a possible husband. Perhaps anyone who appears to offer some kind of support, money is only part of it, and a future is what she maybe looking for. I see this many times. If she is over 30, I think chances are if you are ok looking and under 60 she will stay...again ..looking for a future. The problem is with the young beautiful 19 to 23 year old girls. If an older man in his 50'sor 60's wants to have one of these for keepers he will have to offer something in the beginning to keep her interested. The relationship will last not due to money but if they are happy together. If they are not happy it will end no matter how much he pays. I know a few guys who are over 50 and have married very young beautiful girls. They offered support in the beginning but later fell in love, both, and married. The ones I know are very very happy ! Man over 50, ok looking, with young knockouts ...married and happy. The ones I know are either mothers now or are now working either in the husband business or outside of the house.

And I share all cost with the wife she pays 40% of electricity, mortgage, internet, car ect. I pay most of the food and the other 60%. Because i have a deal like that according to your theory my wife would be one of the ugliest ones around. Maybe she is ugly most people say she is not and she got a facebook full of people saying she is not. But it all depends what you like in a girl. Talking about beauty is kinda hard its just like talking about food one person likes this an other does not.

But i think we can all agree that an overweight guy with a belly and sagging body is not handsome compared to a guy in the prime of his life (early 20's).

I think it depends on where they first met, what she does for a living, how old she is, if she has kids, etc etc..every relationship is different. If she is over 26 and worked the bar for a few years, married before with kids or just ready to settle down I think they will stay with any decent guy no matter of age or how much money they get. Perhaps anyone who appears to offer some kind of support, money is only part of it, and a future is what most are really looking for. I see this many times. If she is over 30, I think chances are if you are a nice guy and under 60 she will stay...again ..looking for a future. The problem is not with the older Thai girls. The problem is with the young beautiful 19 to 24 year old girls. If an older man in his 50'sor 60's wants to have one of these for keepers he will have to offer something in the beginning to keep her interested. The relationship will last not due to money but if they are happy together. If they are not happy it will end no matter how much he pays. I know a few guys who are over 50 and have married very young beautiful girls. They offered support in the beginning but later fell in love and married. The ones I know are very very happy ! Man over 50, ok looking, with young knockouts ...married and happy. The ones I know are either mothers now or are now working either in the husband's business or outside of the house.

I see many young guys out there who fit your description of overweight with a belly and sagging body. I also see many young guys who are in great shape but are total losers.The poor girls with them think they got something but only because they don't know better. Some of these girls maybe good looking but, as you say, mentally handicapped !!