What Will You Do When Becoming Old And Dependent ?

[bangkokcitylimits]

Just curious,

some are blessed with a very good wife, but when not or when single what to do when becoming old and eventually physically or mentally dependent ? Stay here, and how, or choose to go home ? What you think may be the benefits or disadvantages of both ?

Edited September 23, 2010 by bangkokcitylimits

[StreetCowboy]

Your son looks well capable of looking after you in your dotage, from the picture of him that you posted

SC

[Jingthing]

Why fret about the last often horrible portion of life? Many would be better without it.

[StreetCowboy]

Why fret about the last often horrible portion of life? Many would be better without it.

My dear old grandma said that long after the irony wore thin.

Sadly, only the good die young, the wicked and corrupt become prematurely aged and decrepit, if my experience is anything to go by

SC

[neverdie]

Its a long time away for me & I can guarantee that I wont be anywhere near Thailand @ that age.

[IanForbes]

It depends on whether I become a burden to others or not. I've got some cyanide squirrled away should I ever need it. My father died at 87 in a hospital bed because he no longer wanted to live after mother moved him out of his home and both of them into one of the old folks residences. He no longer wanted to live and just stopped eating. Eventually, he just dried up and his body functions stopped working. My mother died about 2 years later... pretty much the same way. I wish I could go quicker, but we are not allowed to commit suicide in Canada... even if we want to. Our Canadian government spends more on keeping old people barely alive than they do on any other expense.

As one guy said... I want to die just like grampa... quietly in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the 5 people in the car that grampa was driving.

[Valdezugar]

I might just go to the beach for a long swim and just keep swimming . . . .

[Peterbigeyes]

I'll go back I guess. Don't want to think about it now though, I'll leave the details to a later date : )

[doggie888888]

It's a fair question that I have alreay thought about, now that I am still able to think

I refuse to die slowly and painfully nor do I want to put my loved ones through it...with each labored breath of mine, they at my bedside will inevitably start to forget the happier times and instead focus on the misery, pain and despair before them. Remember me at my best, not at my worst.

When the time comes, I know I shall be at a little clinic in Zurich, where a painless and dignified end awaits...at my timing and on my own free will. Thank goodness for countries which provide an enlightened non-compulsory option.

[Valdezugar]

It depends on whether I become a burden to others or not. I've got some cyanide squirrled away should I ever need it. My father died at 87 in a hospital bed because he no longer wanted to live after mother moved him out of his home and both of them into one of the old folks residences. He no longer wanted to live and just stopped eating. Eventually, he just dried up and his body functions stopped working. My mother died about 2 years later... pretty much the same way. I wish I could go quicker, but we are not allowed to commit suicide in Canada... even if we want to. Our Canadian government spends more on keeping old people barely alive than they do on any other expense.

As one guy said... I want to die just like grampa... quietly in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the 5 people in the car that grampa was driving.

Ian . . . . your Canadian government must find it hard keeping tabs on oder folk suspected of wanting to check themselves out

My old man is 81 and he looks like he's going to live forever. I'm not sure that's such a good thing . . . .

[Shotime]

A co-worker once asked me "How you gonna feel when you're on your death-bed, and there's no one there to grieve you?" I looked at him like he was crazy, and answered "Who cares, I'm dying?"

I feel confident, that if I should need someone to take care of me, I won't call my present TGF. She's totally useless. Forunately, I don't need her for that at the moment. We call her the Queen.

[billd766]

I have already discussed this with my wife and a couple of friends.

I told my wife that I do not want to stay alive plugged into machines and spending her and our sons inheritance.

She has said that she will look after me but my thoughts are when I feel it is time to go I will say goodbye to them, take some pills to help me sleep for ever and wash them down with some good rum and coke then go to sleep.

I am building a folder on my computer of who to cantact and what to do when I am gone.

A couple of farang friends will help her out and I will never be that far away from my wife and son.

[bangkokcitylimits]

It's a fair question that I have alreay thought about, now that I am still able to think

I refuse to die slowly and painfully nor do I want to put my loved ones through it...with each labored breath of mine, they at my bedside will inevitably start to forget the happier times and instead focus on the misery, pain and despair before them. Remember me at my best, not at my worst.

When the time comes, I know I shall be at a little clinic in Zurich, where a painless and dignified end awaits...at my timing and on my own free will. Thank goodness for countries which provide an enlightened non-compulsory option.

Between 'becoming dependent and 'when the time comes' there can be many years inbetween... not sure if I would feel safe here, and back home there's growing complaints about the poor and unpersonal elderly care.

Perhaps Thaivisa can set up an elderly care home in Thailand, find sponsors and staff... (prefer near the sea)

But hel_l that could become a very unpleasant place to stay, with all those old and demented Thaivisa members stuck into quarreling and complaining about internet speed and bad girls etc.

Edited September 23, 2010 by bangkokcitylimits

[jazzbo]

'Living Wills' in Thailand:

[/url]

http://www.thailawon...lls-in-thailand

[JusMe]

Yes, I too have thought some about it.

However, like the other posters, I always think about it from the point of view that I will be mentally competent and able to do "the necessary."

Comes back to me, though, when I think about the long conversations I had with a very old lady about just this thing. I'm her named person in the medical files, we've got a DNR, and no extraordinary measures to be taken.

But she faded into dementia a few years ago and is unable to remove herself as I know she would have wanted. She is completely dependent, not just in the physical sense.

Kinda morbid and depressing, but I sure hope I'm capable of getting out by myself when the time comes, and that I'm at least aware of the fact that the time has come.

[David006]

It's a fair question that I have alreay thought about, now that I am still able to think

I refuse to die slowly and painfully nor do I want to put my loved ones through it...with each labored breath of mine, they at my bedside will inevitably start to forget the happier times and instead focus on the misery, pain and despair before them. Remember me at my best, not at my worst.

When the time comes, I know I shall be at a little clinic in Zurich, where a painless and dignified end awaits...at my timing and on my own free will. Thank goodness for countries which provide an enlightened non-compulsory option.

Between 'becoming dependent and 'when the time comes' there can be many years inbetween... not sure if I would feel safe here, and back home there's growing complaints about the poor and unpersonal elderly care.

Perhaps Thaivisa can set up an elderly care home in Thailand, find sponsors and staff... (prefer near the sea)

But hel_l that could become a very unpleasant place to stay, with all those old and demented Thaivisa members stuck into quarreling and complaining about internet speed and bad girls etc.

:cheesy:

..."it's scary out there!"..Granpa Simpson

my sons were calling me Granpa Simpson ten years ago...!

read somewhere that euthanasia drugs can be bought at the vets in LOS and were even advertised in Bangkok??

F..d if I want to die in a place stinking of old people like me......although the Canadian ones seem to be like bloody five star hotels! atleast in BC...

..nah!!! I like the "keep swimming" idea...probably wouldn't get far...easy just to swim off Kata/Karon beach in the westerly trades/wet season....seems almost a guaranteed solution...

....time for my pill..... :sleepy:

Edited September 23, 2010 by David006

[evanson]

It depends on whether I become a burden to others or not. I've got some cyanide?! squirrled away should I ever need it. My father died at 87 in a hospital bed because he no longer wanted to live after mother moved him out of his home and both of them into one of the old folks residences. He no longer wanted to live and just stopped eating. Eventually, he just dried up and his body functions stopped working. My mother died about 2 years later... pretty much the same way. I wish I could go quicker, but we are not allowed to commit suicide in Canada... even if we want to. Our Canadian government spends more on keeping old people barely alive than they do on any other expense.

As one guy said... I want to die just like grampa... quietly in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the 5 people in the car that grampa was driving.

Bit late then isn't it? What they gonna do? Send in the Ghostbusters? And cyanide?!!! Handful of Tramadol 50s and a nice burgundy or several will do me

Edited September 23, 2010 by evanson

[Royrex]

My plan is when I get Alzheimer I won't know what is going on. I will request my Embassy to fly me back to the states as a hardship case. then I'll taking advantage of that new wonderful health care plan Obama put in.

[evanson]

A co-worker once asked me "How you gonna feel when you're on your death-bed, and there's no one there to grieve you?" I looked at him like he was crazy, and answered "Who cares, I'm dying?"

I feel confident, that if I should need someone to take care of me, I won't call my present TGF. She's totally useless. Forunately, I don't need her for that at the moment. We call her the Queen.

Well one way of looking on the bright side:) Don't want some miserable sod/s sobbing around me when I'm on my way back home.

[evanson]

My plan is when I get Alzheimer I won't know what is going on. I will request my Embassy to fly me back to the states as a hardship case. then I'll taking advantage of that new wonderful health care plan Obama put in.

But, how will you know?

[Jingthing]

My plan is when I get Alzheimer I won't know what is going on. I will request my Embassy to fly me back to the states as a hardship case. then I'll taking advantage of that new wonderful health care plan Obama put in.

You will likely be over 65 by then. Social security and Medicare have existed for decades now, have nothing to with either Obama or Obamacare. You sure you aren't suffering this way already?

Next ...

[Loz]

every day i'm staggered i got This far. even irritable about it. i thought i'd have done everything that mattered by 30. imagine my disapapointment when i found the list had bloody grown! when the bucket list is empty i'll let go. til then i got stuff to do.

[bifftastic]

It depends on whether I become a burden to others or not. I've got some cyanide?! squirrled away should I ever need it. My father died at 87 in a hospital bed because he no longer wanted to live after mother moved him out of his home and both of them into one of the old folks residences. He no longer wanted to live and just stopped eating. Eventually, he just dried up and his body functions stopped working. My mother died about 2 years later... pretty much the same way. I wish I could go quicker, but we are not allowed to commit suicide in Canada... even if we want to. Our Canadian government spends more on keeping old people barely alive than they do on any other expense.

As one guy said... I want to die just like grampa... quietly in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the 5 people in the car that grampa was driving.

Bit late then isn't it? What they gonna do? Send in the Ghostbusters? And cyanide?!!! Handful of Tramadol 50s and a nice burgundy or several will do me

I agree, cyanide is a bit...ummm extreme? cold war? painful? Ian, are you 'The Man from Uncle'?

as for not being allowed to commit suicide even if you want to, why would you do it if you didn't want to?

[bifftastic]

My plan is when I get Alzheimer I won't know what is going on. I will request my Embassy to fly me back to the states as a hardship case. then I'll taking advantage of that new wonderful health care plan Obama put in.

You will likely be over 65 by then. Social security and Medicare have existed for decades now, have nothing to with either Obama or Obamacare. You sure you aren't suffering this way already?

Next ...

Also, it's nice to have a plan for what you'll do when you get Alzheimers, however, there may be a problem when it actually happens...."who are all these people?....what's my name?...ah, I must have Alzheimers, now, where did I put that piece of paper with my 'what to do when I get Alzheimers' plan on it?...Nurse! (what's a nurse?)"

[StreetCowboy]

My plan is when I get Alzheimer I won't know what is going on. I will request my Embassy to fly me back to the states as a hardship case. then I'll taking advantage of that new wonderful health care plan Obama put in.

You will likely be over 65 by then. Social security and Medicare have existed for decades now, have nothing to with either Obama or Obamacare. You sure you aren't suffering this way already?

Next ...

Also, it's nice to have a plan for what you'll do when you get Alzheimers, however, there may be a problem when it actually happens...."who are all these people?....what's my name?...ah, I must have Alzheimers, now, where did I put that piece of paper with my 'what to do when I get Alzheimers' plan on it?...Nurse! (what's a nurse?)"

As I said earlier, the irony wears thin after a decade or so...

SC

[Tonto21]

It depends on whether I become a burden to others or not. I've got some cyanide squirrled away should I ever need it. My father died at 87 in a hospital bed because he no longer wanted to live after mother moved him out of his home and both of them into one of the old folks residences. He no longer wanted to live and just stopped eating. Eventually, he just dried up and his body functions stopped working. My mother died about 2 years later... pretty much the same way. I wish I could go quicker, but we are not allowed to commit suicide in Canada... even if we want to. Our Canadian government spends more on keeping old people barely alive than they do on any other expense.

As one guy said... I want to die just like grampa... quietly in his sleep. Not screaming in terror like the 5 people in the car that grampa was driving.

Hi Ian, Yes, Ha-ha, this is one of my favorite one liners. The version I know go’s; I hope to go hysterically laughing like my father……….not like his bus passengers” The late great Bob Monkhouse!

[lovelomsak]

I have thought a lot about this even before I came here. I am a single man in my 60's I realize no one really gives a hoot about me if I am alive or dead that is why I am here it is the best place in the world for a man who no one cares about to live. I can live here not care about anyone and no one cares about me.In the future be it the near future or distant furture I will simply hire a caregiver here in Thailand. If I become so unstable she is in complete control then I only hope she takes good care of me. If she decides to not take good care of me and abuse things then I can do nothing about it, But I willnot return to Canada and go in an old folks home. I would buy a sailboat and sail off into the sunset before I would ever sit around all day with people that couldnot give me the time of day when I was young, and now have nothing in common with them.

[Tonto21]

Strange isn’t it, as we get older the fear of death diminish but the possibly of living on past the point of any quality in your life increases. Life is not about the amount of breaths we take, the breathing in and out each day, it’s about the moments that take your breath away. For me it’s all about the “quality not the quantity” When there is no more joy in my life……..It’s time to check out, on my terms!

[Moonrakers]

What will you do when becoming old and dependant?

I'm going to sit outside my house, screaming at everybody to gerroff my lawn and confiscating any kids toys that enter my garden.

[Kwasaki]

n/a I'm goner live forever.