Living In Thailand? Are You 'jai Yen Yen'?

[simon43]

I ask this question after rereading other posts where members vent their venom about a range of topics, (such as child abuse, druggies, Thai people, wife's family etc etc).

When I lived in England and worked 'the ratrace', I would vent my anger at minor infractions or whatever. When you commute every day on the M25 motorway, you need to be ready to shout and swear at other drivers

But, since coming to live in Thailand, I've mellowed considerably. All my Thai friends say I'm 'jai yen yen' or 'jai dee mak'. I am still concerned about the sort of issues that I mentioned in the first paragraph. But I tend to be much more philosophical and calm in my response.

So, maybe I have really made the transformation into a Thai person!! (except I don't have a breaking point after which I go completely stir-crazy....)

Every day in my travels in LoS. I see (time after time), examples of 'farang' losing their tempers about the most minor of issues. From listening to their conversations, it seems that many of these angry guys live full-time in Thailand.

As an aside, (and this is an observation only), most of these angry guys are American. (I have American friends in LoS who ARE jai yen yen, so this is not meant to be a dig at yanks...)

Are you an angry farang??

Are Americans more 'prone' to losing their cool?

Just interested to know how many frangs really are jai yen yen..

Simon

[Neeranam]

Are you an angry farang?? I never lose my temper anymore.

Are Americans more 'prone' to losing their cool? In my experience - definately, as the find it harder to adjust.

Just interested to know how many frangs really are jai yen yen.. My friends can't believe it.

[pnustedt]

When you commute every day on the M25 motorway, you need to be ready to shout and swear at other drivers

Chris Rhea's rendition of "Road to hel_l" (my wife's fav. record) may help your reminiscence!

I am currently in HK but I will try to answer your curiosity. Whilst here I have learnt how to concentrate on the things that are within my sphere of influence, and not to get too upset over things that I cannot influence.

Gradually, I have found that my sphere has grown to an extent that I am quite comfortable.

The American slant may be that they are used to a wider sphere of influence in the first place and, subsequently, become more frustrated quicker.

[lamphun]

I only get upset with farangs. With Thais you just go with the flow.

[Thai Chi]

But, since coming to live in Thailand, I've mellowed considerably.  All my Thai friends say I'm 'jai yen yen' or 'jai dee mak'. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think the above quoted sentence answers it for me. I can remember my first trip here in 2003. On that trip I got angry at salespeople/touts/embarrasing tourists/travel agents/tour operators /Tailors/mini-bus drivers/hotel operators etc etc I realized it was mostly to do with my lack of the languge. I just couldnt make myself understood. 7 trips later and I still only speak Thai nid noy, but now I subscribe to the mai pen rai attitude on most matters. Having said that. I must admit to a very smooth transition to my present position. Having read some of the horror stories here on T.V. (see the ongoing saga of the ex-pilot in the Phuket Forum) I am yet to encounter any major dramas. However. time will tell, and if I do come up against a problem, I hope I can just say "mai pen rai" and get on living in this (sometimes misunderstood) great place

[TizMe]

If I was any more laid back, the blood pressure in my head would kill me.

[chownah]

I'm definitely calmer than before. A couple of reasons. First, I can live here the rest of my life and never have to work for money. It probably took me two years to decompress from the stress and frustration of working for money. Second, I have been building a house and have been overseeing the work of Thai workers. These are my neighbors in the village and they are really good at doing things in one particular way and they are very good at doing things the very cheapest way and making do with what is at hand or affordable. This is all great except for the fact that it is NOT how I wanted my house to be built. From this experience I have learned that some things don't really matter and most problems with the house are more easily fixed later than it is to fix a problem that you create with your neighbor because of an outburst of anger or frustration. Third, I had a lot of problems with the general mai pen rai attitude but some how I have been lucky to not let it bother me and in fact after awhile you find that actually they are right in many ways and in life most things really are mai pen rai.

[eddie11]

I thik I am more " jai yen yen " than my wife ( Thai ).After we lived in the UK for 6 years she got used to the "I need it yesterday " style of living and she realy hates having to wait for some "Jumped up beaurocrat(usually about 18 years old) telling her it will take 2 days to change her Tabien Baan at the local amphur office.I think she may have lost her "mai pen rai" where as I have gained mine.

[AmeriThai]

I ask this question after rereading other posts where members vent their venom about a range of topics, (such as child abuse, druggies, Thai people, wife's family etc etc).

When I lived in England and worked 'the ratrace', I would vent my anger at minor infractions or whatever.  When you commute every day on the M25 motorway, you need to be ready to shout and swear at other drivers

But, since coming to live in Thailand, I've mellowed considerably.  All my Thai friends say I'm 'jai yen yen' or 'jai dee mak'.  I am still concerned about the sort of issues that I mentioned in the first paragraph.  But I tend to be much more philosophical and calm in my response.

So, maybe I have really made the transformation into a Thai person!! (except I don't have a breaking point after which I go completely stir-crazy....)

Every day in my travels in LoS. I see (time after time), examples of 'farang' losing their tempers about the most minor of issues. From listening to their conversations, it seems that many of these angry guys live full-time in Thailand. 

As an aside, (and this is an observation only), most of these angry guys are American.  (I have American friends in LoS who ARE jai yen yen, so this is not meant to be a dig at yanks...)

Are you an angry farang??

Are Americans more 'prone' to losing their cool?

Just interested to know how many frangs really are jai yen yen..

Simon

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

The Americans I actually know in Thailand are just a few. Not many at all. They seem to be very easy going. I've also bumped into a few Brits who seemed to complain about everything.

I've also seen a few Thais who were very angry or negative people. One in particular at a large party who went berserk yelling loudly and breaking things. He was drunk. Some tuk-tuk drivers along Suk, Soi 8 who seemd to enjoy insulting people who didn't want to take them up on their offer for a tour. Another driver by the Night Market in Ayuttaya who'd speak in Thai that all farangs are filthy rich and should be fleeced. Her demeanor instantly changed when she realized I could understand every word she said. Would it be reasonable to think or wonder if all Thais were like that?

Most Americans I know in the U.S. tend to be very good-hearted people, the kind of people anyone would like to meet. But I also know there are some Americans who can be really irritating to be around. I don't spend much time with chronic complainers.

I'm inclined to think that people who are loud-mouthed &lt;deleted&gt; in Thailand are probably loud-mouthed &lt;deleted&gt; back home. The only reason they're noticed at all is because they tend to make the most noise and go out of their way to seek attention.

Every country has people who are jai yen as well as those who are a bit more jai rawn. Because a few people may seem to be angry, or complain a lot, doesn't mean they are typical of people from their own countries. They just tend to be more noticable, like blaring negative front page headlines of newspapers.

Of all the farangs (regardless of where they're from) I've ever actually met, even briefly, most tend to be jai yen. All people, whether farang or not, have different views and opinions about certain subjects. And all people have their own limit as to what can push them to anger. Anger in and by itself isn't a problem. It's how it's expressed in a manner that's either controlled and positive or uncontrolled and negative that makes the real difference. It depends on how a person looks at the world around them, as well as their own sense of self-esteem.

[Mighty Mouse]

Are you an angry farang??

Leave me alone. I'm too #### angry to answer such a #### silly question right now!!!!

..........I can't find my #### de-stress pills !!!