When You Marry A Thai Man

[xthAi76s]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

tripe, my wife pays for me all the time im a house husband she pulls in over 200k a month, maybe im the exception but i doubt it.

I see your point, but, YES, your wife is the exception -- or, at least, she belongs to very small percentage of people who earn that kind of money.

I'll take this opportunity to reinforce my point in my last post.

Before we left the US, my wife was making very near 100,000 USD (approximately 3,084,895 THB / year before taxes) post MBA, and I was earning nearly 200,000 USD/year (approximately 6,169,790 THB / year). That's about -- 9,254,685 THB / year -- or -- 771,000 THB / month -- in (pre-tax) income with no kids and a fabulous life. This is also not to boast because for where we lived, most of our friends and family members expected this of us, and, still in our twenties, we anticipated earning a lot more as we worked longer in the workforce.

The point is that we gave all that up to come and live and do things we consider more interesting here in Thailand.

You can try to paint any stats with a broad brush, but, as one poster put it, it's more about demographics and such so you need to look at those and other contributing factors like motivation to get a good picture of what's going on. I've met a couple couples here in Bangkok that have stories similar to mine, and I see other young couples who seem to be more like us. Even caught a young, very good looking couple in line at lotus yesterday -- the lady is White, and not at all unattractive, and her husband is Thai, and also a very good looking person -- and I picked up on the wife speaking what appeared to be fluent Thai to the cashier asking about sales and paying bills and such.

[TantraMantra]

If a western woman marries a Thai man the chances are high that he has wealth, your run of the mill Thai man with normal low paying job has nothing to offer nor has the access or skills to socialize with western woman.

JH

Are you saying that there are not many stupid Farang women women falling for loser Thai men like there are stupid Farang men falling for bar girls.

[bina]

ug... funnily enough, most of the mixed couples of 'white female' married to thai male here in israel are only that: work bannork thai man and , usually, anlgo or european israeli women from various and sundry walks of life...... dont think i would want a high rolling, money hungry hi so thai guy... i like simple living, farms, dirt, and good personality much more then i like money. survival skills for a woman dont neccessarily mean dollars. hubby is a geat fixer upper type; muscles and practical knowlege for everything from fishing in the yarkon river for our dinner to all mechani

cal and stuff around the house. its obvious that i do the finances, partially because of language and parially because of inclination. my college degree is not what makes me the 'financier', its my personality type.

wouldnt trade for the world. and its obvious that my parents are more well off then his, mine help me, we help his.

bina

[scorecard]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

"Certainly no woman would PAY a man!"

So your saying that:

- Woman never pay for gigolos. Are you aware that there are numerous 'ladies clubs' in Bangkok (and they also exist in Pattaya at least), where the customers are women only and there are numerous waiters etc., who are all available, and that's the only reason why the women customers go there. And I'm sure such venues exist in pretty much every city in the world. Tokyo, Osaka and all the other big cities in Japan have many such clubs.

- Marriages of convenience whereby the husband is actually an employee don't exist. There are thousands of such arrangements in every county in the world. Mae West (just one example) was purported to have many such arrangements. I'm aware of a middle aged very successful Thai businesswoman in Bkk who has at least three young 'husbands', all about 25 - 30 years younger than her, they all live in the same house, and her family and friends know exactly what the arrangement is. And she's a very hot woman, looks after herself, dresses smartly but appropriate to her age, she's very attractive.

Edited December 4, 2011 by scorecard

[Boo]

it's always a misconception amongst men who look for & are attracted to the money grabbing type of women that all women are after the same.

To find out that there are women who don't look for nor need a money making man is very hard & sometimes impossible for them to accept.

Their interpretation of a provider = money. My husband won me by demonstrating his skills in more manly pursuits, providing on a much more natural level with muscle & practical abilities, things that actually matter to me.

But as they saying goes, you have the exact relationship you want.

If you are with a women who is after money & possessions they you are sending out the signals to get one or possibly it is your only skill.

[lovelaos]

Yes we send his parents money- it's something he did long before he met me. His siblings send the in-laws the same amount, so my hubby is not being singled out to send more because he has a farang spouse. I did get a sin-sot but as the in-laws are very poor and could not afford it, they used our money and returned it to us later.

A close friend of mine is married to a Thai guy whose background is very similar to my husband's. We talked about this just recently - that we are with our hubbies for a myriad of reasons, none of which are based on money. For me they include hub's kindness, big smile, gentle nature, the fact he cares deeply and openly for his family and is great with kids. He is a hard worker even when being paid a pittance and treated like rubbish by his employers and despite his difficult life has very strong moral values: he does not gamble, drink excessively or beat me. He is inquisitive, loves learning new things and is excited about us having a life together. He doesn't need a university education or a lot of money to be a nice, normal man in a happy, strong marriage.

- very similar situation to us (he always sent money home before me), and sounds a lot like my hubby also.

Also, like sbk, we didn't have a formal wedding, no ceremony, so no sin-sod (we got married at the amphur where we live, not where his family lives). We had to register the marriage again for cultural reasons in his province, but was just us in an office behind a desk, and they wanted to write down how much dowry he was gving me personally (they made me promise I would get him to give it to me). His parents never asked about that, and we never told them. His father actually passed away before we went back to the village (next time we went back was for the funeral), so no wedding celebration was ever held. All they wanted was a photo to put on the cupbaord, and to see the fancy wedding certificate, and how my name looked in local script.

When our baby was born my husbands mother suprised me my coming all the way to Bangkok (for the first time in her life) to see the baby, and then presented our 6 week old baby with very expensive solid gold jewellery (that was way too big and a bit of a choking hazard if you ask me).

During her visit to Bangkok she wanted to buy an electrical appliance for making some kind of local snack (as apparently the lady who used to run this business in the village had passed on and she thought it would be a good idea to fill the gap in the market). There were three kinds of machine, all rather inexpensive, and she insisted she had the money for one herself. I insisted on buying her a second one, as I knew all the money she made would be going on her neices and nephews.

To address the original OP question:

I was wondering if western women married to a Thai feel the same

expectations of having to provide financial assistance to her husband's family?

It is hard not to feel as though you want to help when you see how basic the living conditions are compared to what we are used to in the west. His parents have never made me feel obliged though.

I did take a teenage nephew of my hubby to Bangkok for a consult and then operation at Rutnin, as we found out he had gone blind in one eye during a visit to the village a few years back. It kept me awake at night until I contacted a surgeon (via ThaiVisa recomendations) that agreed to see him. That was for my own personal reasons of wanting to help the kid see again if he could, as the family thought they had exhausted the medical options available already. I just could not have lived peacefully without having tried all the options I knew of to help him, and it being Thailand, it was not financially excessive to do so for me. I was never asked to help, in fact it was all my idea.

I also gave his sister a sum of money once to get a small business going so she could be financially independant of her husband, but again it was not a lot of money and it made a big difference to her life. I refused to loan her the money, but insisted she take it as a gift. She would no doubt help support our baby if we needed her help, even if we hadn't given her money, so am glad we did.

I like to get mulit-lingal books for the youngest niece who has started school also. But that is because I think she is really smart and like to give her things she has no access to in her village that I think would be good for her education, and apparently she loves them. The cost here is negligable and the smile on her face is priceless as she is so cute. Education is the key to a better life after all.

A coconut tree fell on his mums house last week during the big storm, and his sisters house also (next door to each other), knocking a big section of one house down, and a small part of the other. His mum called to tell him about the damage and ask if he could come home to help fix things as not many family members in town at present. She insisted she had the money to pay for repairs herself though.

Do I feel as though it is expected of me to contribute financially? Definitely not since we were married, and absolutely doesn't feel that way since our baby was born.

So do I still feel obliged? Only when my feelings and insticts tell me it is the right thing to do, if I have the funds available to give, and an opportunity presents itself to do something tactfully.

What a nice, refreshingly honest post.

[lovelaos]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

"Certainly no woman would PAY a man!"

So your saying that:

- Woman never pay for gigolos. Are you aware that there are numerous 'ladies clubs' in Bangkok (and they also exist in Pattaya at least), where the customers are women only and there are numerous waiters etc., who are all available, and that's the only reason why the women customers go there. And I'm sure such venues exist in pretty much every city in the world. Tokyo, Osaka and all the other big cities in Japan have many such clubs.

- Marriages of convenience whereby the husband is actually an employee don't exist. There are thousands of such arrangements in every county in the world. Mae West (just one example) was purported to have many such arrangements. I'm aware of a middle aged very successful Thai businesswoman in Bkk who has at least three young 'husbands', all about 25 - 30 years younger than her, they all live in the same house, and her family and friends know exactly what the arrangement is. And she's a very hot woman, looks after herself, dresses smartly but appropriate to her age, she's very attractive.

Some people lead very sheltered lives.... any chance of PM me this Thai ladies address?

[rgs2001uk]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

"Certainly no woman would PAY a man!"

So your saying that:

- Woman never pay for gigolos. Are you aware that there are numerous 'ladies clubs' in Bangkok (and they also exist in Pattaya at least), where the customers are women only and there are numerous waiters etc., who are all available, and that's the only reason why the women customers go there. And I'm sure such venues exist in pretty much every city in the world. Tokyo, Osaka and all the other big cities in Japan have many such clubs.

- Marriages of convenience whereby the husband is actually an employee don't exist. There are thousands of such arrangements in every county in the world. Mae West (just one example) was purported to have many such arrangements. I'm aware of a middle aged very successful Thai businesswoman in Bkk who has at least three young 'husbands', all about 25 - 30 years younger than her, they all live in the same house, and her family and friends know exactly what the arrangement is. And she's a very hot woman, looks after herself, dresses smartly but appropriate to her age, she's very attractive.

Some people lead very sheltered lives.... any chance of PM me this Thai ladies address?

Start attending likay concerts and sit beside the mae yok, chops needs to get out a bit more.

[mikecwm]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

You must look like the bloke in my avatar.

You mean that's not you?

Jeez I thought that was you. I knew there had to be someone uglier than me out there.

[bina]

providing on a much more natural level with muscle & practical abilities, things that actually matter to me.

as i had stated, same same here.. i take that over any suited moneytree that cant do anything around the house... previous hubby was also a farmer type no money// and there are plenty of us.. just the basic western male seems to run in the wrong crowds to find us...

[luckizuchinni]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

News to you. Men have to pay because women aren't "into it" like men. Heard the expression "No money no honey"?

Women of all sorts marry men without money. Not all men have money, and yet they marry. And many men marry women of means.

In the US, I know of many, many couples where the wife is a moneyed professional while the husband is at best underemployed and at worst, sort of a cad, and strippers are notorious for supporting out-of-work boyfriends.

[luckizuchinni]

NO woman is going to marry any man of any nationality unless he has money. Certainly no woman would PAY a man!

It happens occasionaly, but it is rare.

Studies have shown that 90% "liberated" Western women marry upwards from their own status.

I would love to see those "studies" as the math just doesn't work out. Even given that women don't make quite as much as men in the west, and given that the very poor men might not marry, the mere fact that so many people do manage to marry would make that claim pretty much mathematically impossible.

[bonobo]

... some of you dinosaurs claiming all women marry for money have clearly never had a women fall in lust & then love with you (11 years this year & still going strong.)

Very sad for you

+1

[thaibeachlovers]

any more snidey remarks about sbk or her life will result in enforced break from the forum. anyone doesn't like that take it up with support. dragging your personal chips & issues to this thread will not be tolerated.

I hope this is clear.

oh & no no sin sod for me either, no formal wedding no sinsod, was offered but as we haven't had the ceremony (yet) it has not been given. when & if we ever do then it will be presented as per my husbands family custom. I don't support his family either, he sends to his mum, that's his business & he wasn't rich when we met, some of you dinosaurs claiming all women marry for money have clearly never had a women fall in lust & then love with you (11 years this year & still going strong.)

Very sad for you

Not saying that women only marry for money, but I never met a woman that married a man without prospects and was prepared to support him and his family for the rest of her life.

[sbk]

And I have, so what? Does that make you more right than me or your experiences more valid? I don't think so.

I find it very very amusing how "expert" so many men are on what women think and feel. As a woman, it is quite clear to me, most don't really have much of a clue.

[TingTawng]

any more snidey remarks about sbk or her life will result in enforced break from the forum. anyone doesn't like that take it up with support. dragging your personal chips & issues to this thread will not be tolerated.

I hope this is clear.

oh & no no sin sod for me either, no formal wedding no sinsod, was offered but as we haven't had the ceremony (yet) it has not been given. when & if we ever do then it will be presented as per my husbands family custom. I don't support his family either, he sends to his mum, that's his business & he wasn't rich when we met, some of you dinosaurs claiming all women marry for money have clearly never had a women fall in lust & then love with you (11 years this year & still going strong.)

Very sad for you

Not saying that women only marry for money, but I never met a woman that married a man without prospects and was prepared to support him and his family for the rest of her life.

I agree. What you say describes our underlying nature. I've said this on another thread but we humans are still essentially cavemen and women. Men are sought by women to offer protection and security to her family. Men look to spread their DNA far and wide, but men also have to ensure their offspring are well looked after, so most stick around and ensure they provide for the family.

If you think this is somehow "wrong", look at other examples of where we're "stuck" with our caveman characteristics. Look at our misfiring fight or flight response which is incorrectly activated when under psychological stress, not physical danger - why is this? Because our fight or flight response is programmed to be active all day long because of the many dangers we faced back in our caveman days. Look at our digestive systems - still designed for a caveman diet (look up "paleo diet" in Google) - gluten / dairy intolerance shows you how slow the body evolves (grains / dairy products became popular only over last 10,000 years).

To sum up, our innate psychological needs haven't changed much for hundreds of thousands of years, nor have our physical needs. Certainly, society has changed very quickly, but humans have not. That's why we always get these debates about relationships. A lot of people argue the ideological side of the debate - that money doesn't matter, that a woman looks after a man as much as a man looks after a woman etc. The other side points out actual human nature. Neither side is "wrong" in a sense - the ideologists are really saying where we SHOULD be and because many people consciously try to BE part of this equality, they act it out and live such a life; the other side describe the reality of human nature.

Edited December 6, 2011 by TingTawng

[sparebox2]

You want to marry a Thai man!

Are you serious?

Are you loco?

[xthAi76s]

Well, I have read (almost) all answers here, and I still don't know what is the answer to the OPs question.

Seems there are very few women who married Thai men, at least on this forum.

My educated guess is this:

- Since in traditional Thai society men have the role of providing for the family, women are not expected to support their husbands families.

- If the women offers money to her husband's (poor) family, it will be happily accepted.

- If the husband family is well off, then offering money could even be considered an insult.

If some Thais could enlighten us on this issue it would be very helpful.

Did you read mine? Unless someone can point to an acceptable study or have themselves conducted a study, the most reasonable way to answer the OP's question is to give all of our individual anecdotal evidences. The less interesting alternative, since the OP's question was asked as an absolute, is to answer it in the most direct and appropriate way which would be to say: 'maybe in some cases, but not likely in every single case'.

Anecdotes are the best we can do and let the OP decide. The point is to realize that there are all sorts of various relationships out here.

Edited December 6, 2011 by ThailandMan

[KeyserSoze01]

^shouldn't it be moved to the Ladies Forum so some of the ill informed posters can get a good bashing from you ladies that are married to Thais?

I didn't know this was "a men forum"...

I'm a western women and (still) married to a Thai man.

I've lived in Thailand for over nine years so have met many western men who have Thai girlfriends.

The problems they have with their girls are similar to the probs I have with my man.

And yes, I did marry him out of love (not for the money... what money?).

Family comes first? No way! Money still number one! The family is just an excuse for the money.

Phrases like "I want to take care" or "I need your help" is always about money.

The first years were great fun but two years ago my husband became a heavy drinker and a bad liar.

When Thais have problems they start to drink (men and women) instead of solving them and social drinking doesn't

exist in their vocabulary, they drink til their drop.

Some months ago he came home drunk as usual, started to break down the furniture and then lay his hand on me.

I ended up in the hospital and kicked him out (with some help from friends).

Heartbroken, home alone but never a Thai man again!! :jap:

I know a western woman whose story is eerily similar to yours, almost to the letter. She divorced her Thai husband and is now back in the UK.

[KeyserSoze01]

Wow this thread is embarrassing ! How the hell can people get away with posting such bigoted crap ?

I have to agree with you. Unfortunately, when you begin to peel back the layers, most internet forum members are not really very nice people. And it is not just TV where this sort of thing occurs as I have run into these same bigoted folks on multiple forums concerning a myriad of topics, not just Thailand. The human race is but one or two steps up the evolutionary ladder from squatting in the mud and picking dingle-berries off their arse.

[KRS1]

Well, I have read (almost) all answers here, and I still don't know what is the answer to the OPs question.

Seems there are very few women who married Thai men, at least on this forum.

My educated guess is this:

- Since in traditional Thai society men have the role of providing for the family, women are not expected to support their husbands families.

- If the women offers money to her husband's (poor) family, it will be happily accepted.

- If the husband family is well off, then offering money could even be considered an insult.

If some Thais could enlighten us on this issue it would be very helpful.

Thai life helps and shares with others, something very foreign to foreigners in Thailand. Because in the West it is all about yourself.

Male farangs with bar girls phased by the industry should not be taken seriously, their about as wise as my shoe, and can't see much farther than the next morning and how they are going to get out of paying them.

However farangs with a true loneliness and desire to find a soul mate are like anyone else no matter where you are...just dont be cheap, because women dont like that no matter what country you are in.

[TingTawng]

Wow this thread is embarrassing ! How the hell can people get away with posting such bigoted crap ?

I have to agree with you. Unfortunately, when you begin to peel back the layers, most internet forum members are not really very nice people. And it is not just TV where this sort of thing occurs as I have run into these same bigoted folks on multiple forums concerning a myriad of topics, not just Thailand. The human race is but one or two steps up the evolutionary ladder from squatting in the mud and picking dingle-berries off their arse.

From your negative generalisation, it seems you're fitting in quite nicely.

[bonobo]

^shouldn't it be moved to the Ladies Forum so some of the ill informed posters can get a good bashing from you ladies that are married to Thais?

I didn't know this was "a men forum"...

I'm a western women and (still) married to a Thai man.

I've lived in Thailand for over nine years so have met many western men who have Thai girlfriends.

The problems they have with their girls are similar to the probs I have with my man.

And yes, I did marry him out of love (not for the money... what money?).

Family comes first? No way! Money still number one! The family is just an excuse for the money.

Phrases like "I want to take care" or "I need your help" is always about money.

The first years were great fun but two years ago my husband became a heavy drinker and a bad liar.

When Thais have problems they start to drink (men and women) instead of solving them and social drinking doesn't

exist in their vocabulary, they drink til their drop.

Some months ago he came home drunk as usual, started to break down the furniture and then lay his hand on me.

I ended up in the hospital and kicked him out (with some help from friends).

Heartbroken, home alone but never a Thai man again!! :jap:

I feel for your situation, and you have my sympathy. No one should have to suffer like that.

However, when you write "never a Thai man again," that is eerily similar to what some male posters write here, usually with regards to their western ex-wife, explaining their desire to now only be with Thai women.

I know this sounds pie-in-the-sky, but I would hope that we all could judge individuals by their own actions and not close the door on anyone based on their nationality.

[TingTawng]

^shouldn't it be moved to the Ladies Forum so some of the ill informed posters can get a good bashing from you ladies that are married to Thais?

I didn't know this was "a men forum"...

I'm a western women and (still) married to a Thai man.

I've lived in Thailand for over nine years so have met many western men who have Thai girlfriends.

The problems they have with their girls are similar to the probs I have with my man.

And yes, I did marry him out of love (not for the money... what money?).

Family comes first? No way! Money still number one! The family is just an excuse for the money.

Phrases like "I want to take care" or "I need your help" is always about money.

The first years were great fun but two years ago my husband became a heavy drinker and a bad liar.

When Thais have problems they start to drink (men and women) instead of solving them and social drinking doesn't

exist in their vocabulary, they drink til their drop.

Some months ago he came home drunk as usual, started to break down the furniture and then lay his hand on me.

I ended up in the hospital and kicked him out (with some help from friends).

Heartbroken, home alone but never a Thai man again!! :jap:

I feel for your situation, and you have my sympathy. No one should have to suffer like that.

However, when you write "never a Thai man again," that is eerily similar to what some male posters write here, usually with regards to their western ex-wife, explaining their desire to now only be with Thai women.

I know this sounds pie-in-the-sky, but I would hope that we all could judge individuals by their own actions and not close the door on anyone based on their nationality.

Exactly. There's a lot of negative generalisations made across all races and genders on this forum. I admit I generalise too, but it's only from a nature-based point of view (e.g. women tend to seek security/protection more than men do), or cultural differences. To say "when Thais have a problem they start to drink" etc is not even remotely accurate. Also, I do not think Thais are as "money mad" as many posters make out on this forum. They might get that impression from the kinds of people they mix with, I don't know. It's the usual thing on thaivisa.com - extrapolate your own personal experience (bad husband or wife) and generalise it onto an entire population.

[Berkshire]

Heartbroken, home alone but never a Thai man again!! :jap:

I feel for your situation, and you have my sympathy. No one should have to suffer like that.

However, when you write "never a Thai man again," that is eerily similar to what some male posters write here, usually with regards to their western ex-wife, explaining their desire to now only be with Thai women.

I know this sounds pie-in-the-sky, but I would hope that we all could judge individuals by their own actions and not close the door on anyone based on their nationality.

Exactly. There's a lot of negative generalisations made across all races and genders on this forum. I admit I generalise too, but it's only from a nature-based point of view (e.g. women tend to seek security/protection more than men do), or cultural differences. To say "when Thais have a problem they start to drink" etc is not even remotely accurate. Also, I do not think Thais are as "money mad" as many posters make out on this forum. They might get that impression from the kinds of people they mix with, I don't know. It's the usual thing on thaivisa.com - extrapolate your own personal experience (bad husband or wife) and generalise it onto an entire population.

Agree with both Bonobo and TT. So what Cyliam is saying is that one bad experience with, say, a farang woman and we can all say "never a farang woman again!"

[TingTawng]

Heartbroken, home alone but never a Thai man again!! :jap:

I feel for your situation, and you have my sympathy. No one should have to suffer like that.

However, when you write "never a Thai man again," that is eerily similar to what some male posters write here, usually with regards to their western ex-wife, explaining their desire to now only be with Thai women.

I know this sounds pie-in-the-sky, but I would hope that we all could judge individuals by their own actions and not close the door on anyone based on their nationality.

Exactly. There's a lot of negative generalisations made across all races and genders on this forum. I admit I generalise too, but it's only from a nature-based point of view (e.g. women tend to seek security/protection more than men do), or cultural differences. To say "when Thais have a problem they start to drink" etc is not even remotely accurate. Also, I do not think Thais are as "money mad" as many posters make out on this forum. They might get that impression from the kinds of people they mix with, I don't know. It's the usual thing on thaivisa.com - extrapolate your own personal experience (bad husband or wife) and generalise it onto an entire population.

Agree with both Bonobo and TT. So what Cyliam is saying is that one bad experience with, say, a farang woman and we can all say "never a farang woman again!"

Yep, it's true what you say. That's a typical stereotype on TV too. Although if you want to talk about cultural differences between the UK and Thailand, and whether "equality at all costs" western lifestyle is actually good for marriage - well that's another debate.

[teacher17]

I am married to a Thai man. He is from a poor family and he isn't extremely well off himself. He's actually started going back to school (which I am very proud of him for doing)! Currently, we are living with his family in his hometown. We stay there, have our own room-rent free. Although, I do help pay for the electric bill, since they are letting us stay there. There was no sin-sot, mostly because I am not Thai, so I never felt the need for there to be any sin-sot. We share our money and manage to do okay. Sometimes it's hard to save money, but most of the time we manage. His family (and my husband) have never treated me like a walking ATM. In fact, when I first came to stay with them and was looking for a job, they gave ME money! And they are poor...of course, I payed them back later though. Although, it helps that my husband hates drinking-doesn't touch the stuff. So we don't spend a lot of money going to bars or drinking. I think it's funny how everyone assumes all Thai men drink too much....and falang men don't? Of course, some Thai men in the country drink a lot because there really isn't anything else to do...but I am very fortunate that my husband doesn't drink.

[Berkshire]

I am married to a Thai man. He is from a poor family and he isn't extremely well off himself. He's actually started going back to school (which I am very proud of him for doing)! Currently, we are living with his family in his hometown. We stay there, have our own room-rent free. Although, I do help pay for the electric bill, since they are letting us stay there. There was no sin-sot, mostly because I am not Thai, so I never felt the need for there to be any sin-sot. We share our money and manage to do okay. Sometimes it's hard to save money, but most of the time we manage. His family (and my husband) have never treated me like a walking ATM. In fact, when I first came to stay with them and was looking for a job, they gave ME money! And they are poor...of course, I payed them back later though. Although, it helps that my husband hates drinking-doesn't touch the stuff. So we don't spend a lot of money going to bars or drinking. I think it's funny how everyone assumes all Thai men drink too much....and falang men don't? Of course, some Thai men in the country drink a lot because there really isn't anything else to do...but I am very fortunate that my husband doesn't drink.

Refreshing to read something that isn't the typical farang stereotype of all things Thai....

[thaibeachlovers]

And I have, so what? Does that make you more right than me or your experiences more valid? I don't think so.

I find it very very amusing how "expert" so many men are on what women think and feel. As a woman, it is quite clear to me, most don't really have much of a clue.

Hmmmm. I wasn't making a comment about any person in particular, and hadn't read the rest of the thread, so sorry if you think it was aimed at you.

Anyway, no man can ever understand a woman or visa versa. Mars and Venus etc.

[GreenSnapper]

And I have, so what? Does that make you more right than me or your experiences more valid? I don't think so.

I find it very very amusing how "expert" so many men are on what women think and feel. As a woman, it is quite clear to me, most don't really have much of a clue.

Hmmmm. I wasn't making a comment about any person in particular, and hadn't read the rest of the thread, so sorry if you think it was aimed at you.

Anyway, no man can ever understand a woman or visa versa. Mars and Venus etc.

The knowledge a woman has on women is exactly that: herself.

And even that can change during the day depending on her mood.

If you want to know about women, ask an experienced man or make the experiences yourself.

Edited December 8, 2011 by GreenSnapper