Who Wai's Who?

[Ministry of Som Tam]

She obviously hasn't met your alter ego on here then. You can believe what you like and so can I. I should think that most "normal men" (and women) are aware that the vast majority of males in Thailand have indulged in P4P at some stage. It's not a case of having to pay, but there's no point trying to explain that to you, you don't seem all that bright.

I'd rather be me than a deluded fool like you who thinks he is better educated and wealthier than all those around him (older I can believe).

Ah yes,you were 'Helping them out',were you?That old chestnut!

[muythai2013]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

[Tywais]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

Good question but seeing wai topics coming up several times over the years it never fails to get the same type of responses.

[doggie888888]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

Please keep up. Here's a summary of last few (tedious) pages: if your wife Wais you, then she is a prostitute unless you wai her back which makes you inferior to other TV posters but you can redeem yourself if all her siblings and relatives Wai you...that is until you refuse to pay for the sick buffalo. Geddit???

:D

[nidieunimaitre]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

Because a wai is a sign of respect.

However there is respect and respect.

Respect for a good person //// respect for a person with power.

[muythai2013]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

Because a wai is a sign of respect.

However there is respect and respect.

Respect for a good person //// respect for a person with power.

i know all that, i meant how on Earth do people on here fight over the questuon.

[nidieunimaitre]

how on earth does who wai's who lead to an argument.

Because a wai is a sign of respect.

However there is respect and respect.

Respect for a good person //// respect for a person with power.

i know all that, i meant how on Earth do people on here fight over the questuon.

Some people seem to think that wai-ing is compulsary even towards people who have power/age/money, but are not good persons.

[thaibeachlovers]

People that refuse to wai at all, especially if the sentiment is based on some sort of nonsense such as...

It's not MY culture

Really have not a clue about where they are living and feel quite uncomfortable with the exchange.

The interlopers as I like to call them.

There are many times when a wai is not required / neccessary by mixed exchange. Sometimes not required as station as to a child or service staff.

People really should teach themselves how to wai properly and drop the sociopathy and classist attitude and return a wai.

You generally need not initiate it but it is this cultures form of handshake so to speak. Sometimes a nod is sufficient, sometimes not. Extending your hand instead of returning a wai to anyone but a young, Bangkokian male seems to me a total fail.

Seems also to me that the only people that should be on this thread are the people that actually live with Thai's. So...if you live in bubbleland Samui, Phuket, Pattaya and much of BKK and CM. Eat in farang restaurants, rent your companions by the hour, have no Thai friends or relatives, dont really travel farther than from barstool to toilet - your opinion is pretty worthless.

This whole "it's their culture, so you should do it" is a red herring IMO.

Just because it's THEIR culture does not mean that WE have to do it. If that was the case, if I lived with Innuits I'd have to kill whales and eat the blubber, or if I lived in parts of China or India, if my wife had a girl baby, I'd have to kill it.

I've said it before, but when my extended family stops talking about "the farang" in front of me, and treating me like I should be an ATM, I might be more disposed to making an effort.

Having just had a visit with the family, I was never so glad to be getting the hell out of Dodge anyway.

If it ever gets to the point that it causes me a personal problem, it'll be time to move back "home", and believe me, I don't carry out the "culture" there either.

[thaibeachlovers]

That explains it, I don't have sex with women I just met and don't know, so the question of payment has never arisen.

Does your wife know you use prostitutes?

She knows I have had sex with prostitutes in the past, sure. Does your wife know that you think she and her family are inferior to you and should therefore always wai you first?

I would definitely consider someone who has to pay prostitutes for sex, inferior to me.

I would also consider any woman who knowingly married a man who had paid prostitutes for sex, inferior to me.

I'm fairly sure any normal man would think the same, but I may be wrong.

PS

My wife and I don't wai each other, we don't have a master and servant relationship.

Define "normal". In my experience, there is no such state of being.

Considering other people to be inferior to one's self may be considered a sign of a "god complex".

[transam]

People that refuse to wai at all, especially if the sentiment is based on some sort of nonsense such as...

It's not MY culture

Really have not a clue about where they are living and feel quite uncomfortable with the exchange.

The interlopers as I like to call them.

There are many times when a wai is not required / neccessary by mixed exchange. Sometimes not required as station as to a child or service staff.

People really should teach themselves how to wai properly and drop the sociopathy and classist attitude and return a wai.

You generally need not initiate it but it is this cultures form of handshake so to speak. Sometimes a nod is sufficient, sometimes not. Extending your hand instead of returning a wai to anyone but a young, Bangkokian male seems to me a total fail.

Seems also to me that the only people that should be on this thread are the people that actually live with Thai's. So...if you live in bubbleland Samui, Phuket, Pattaya and much of BKK and CM. Eat in farang restaurants, rent your companions by the hour, have no Thai friends or relatives, dont really travel farther than from barstool to toilet - your opinion is pretty worthless.

This whole "it's their culture, so you should do it" is a red herring IMO.

Just because it's THEIR culture does not mean that WE have to do it. If that was the case, if I lived with Innuits I'd have to kill whales and eat the blubber, or if I lived in parts of China or India, if my wife had a girl baby, I'd have to kill it.

I've said it before, but when my extended family stops talking about "the farang" in front of me, and treating me like I should be an ATM, I might be more disposed to making an effort.

Having just had a visit with the family, I was never so glad to be getting the hell out of Dodge anyway.

If it ever gets to the point that it causes me a personal problem, it'll be time to move back "home", and believe me, I don't carry out the "culture" there either.

Hmmmmmm, perhaps your a yob, we don't know, but if shaking hands in your homeland is a problem for you then l think you have a problem.

[shaggy1969]

I suppose at the end of the day it's all about the individual self.

my thinking is that there are two groups of people....

The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.

And the people that do not wai, only care about their own feelings.

[bangkokburning]

Was making run to supermarket yesterday. Passed down corridor. MK restaurant, big glass window. Young woman 19 perhaps gave a wai thru the window to her young co workers as she left her shift change.

Really amusing to what lengths people go to NOT fit in.

If you want to make a political or cultural statement, go back home.You are a guest on at best a one year visa or visa extension.

This crappy attitude is the same one that the latin "gringo" resentment and akiebation derive from.

This is Thailand. If you do not want to.participate in its culture, why are you here? Really. Why? If not the people, culture, foid, religion why in the hell are you here?

Edited March 9, 2013 by bangkokburning

[poanoi]

I'm here doing social work to see if i can make one person not participate in the culture,

i.e prostitution

[thaibeachlovers]

People that refuse to wai at all, especially if the sentiment is based on some sort of nonsense such as...

It's not MY culture

Really have not a clue about where they are living and feel quite uncomfortable with the exchange.

The interlopers as I like to call them.

There are many times when a wai is not required / neccessary by mixed exchange. Sometimes not required as station as to a child or service staff.

People really should teach themselves how to wai properly and drop the sociopathy and classist attitude and return a wai.

You generally need not initiate it but it is this cultures form of handshake so to speak. Sometimes a nod is sufficient, sometimes not. Extending your hand instead of returning a wai to anyone but a young, Bangkokian male seems to me a total fail.

Seems also to me that the only people that should be on this thread are the people that actually live with Thai's. So...if you live in bubbleland Samui, Phuket, Pattaya and much of BKK and CM. Eat in farang restaurants, rent your companions by the hour, have no Thai friends or relatives, dont really travel farther than from barstool to toilet - your opinion is pretty worthless.

This whole "it's their culture, so you should do it" is a red herring IMO.

Just because it's THEIR culture does not mean that WE have to do it. If that was the case, if I lived with Innuits I'd have to kill whales and eat the blubber, or if I lived in parts of China or India, if my wife had a girl baby, I'd have to kill it.

I've said it before, but when my extended family stops talking about "the farang" in front of me, and treating me like I should be an ATM, I might be more disposed to making an effort.

Having just had a visit with the family, I was never so glad to be getting the hell out of Dodge anyway.

If it ever gets to the point that it causes me a personal problem, it'll be time to move back "home", and believe me, I don't carry out the "culture" there either.

Hmmmmmm, perhaps your a yob, we don't know, but if shaking hands in your homeland is a problem for you then l think you have a problem.

??????? That's not the "culture" in my homeland. I don't come from England.

I have no problem shaking hands if someone really wants to, but that's an "imported" culture, just like in Thailand.

[thaibeachlovers]

Was making run to supermarket yesterday. Passed down corridor. MK restaurant, big glass window. Young woman 19 perhaps gave a wai thru the window to her young co workers as she left her shift change.

Really amusing to what lengths people go to NOT fit in.

If you want to make a political or cultural statement, go back home.You are a guest on at best a one year visa or visa extension.

This crappy attitude is the same one that the latin "gringo" resentment and akiebation derive from.

This is Thailand. If you do not want to.participate in its culture, why are you here? Really. Why? If not the people, culture, foid, religion why in the hell are you here?

< why are you here? Really. Why? If not the people, culture, foid, religion why in the hell are you here? >

[thaibeachlovers]

I suppose at the end of the day it's all about the individual self.

my thinking is that there are two groups of people....

The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.

And the people that do not wai, only care about their own feelings.

<The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.>

You don't know my family.

[TommoPhysicist]

This is Thailand. If you do not want to.participate in its culture, why are you here?

This is Thailand, I'm participating in the women.

[thaibeachlovers]

This is Thailand. If you do not want to.participate in its culture, why are you here?

This is Thailand, I'm participating in the women.

[Tywais]

Post removed.

8) Not to post extremely negative views of Thailand or derogatory comments directed towards all Thais.

[cooked]

Za

P

P

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

[barky]

Why are there those that have been living here for some time and still dont know the "rules" ? After all it's not that difficult a custom to understand and follow.

If you are older, you don't initiate the wai. If someone wais you then depending on their age and status you reciprocate with either a "nod and a smile" , a wai at chest level, a wai at chin level, (A wai higher than this is absolutely unnecessary unless you have just met your God.

The ridiculous myth that westerners should automatically wai all and sundry has been propagated by Thais and books such as Lonely Planet. ( I cringe every time I witness some westerner initiating a wai to the 7-11 staff or Tuk Tuk driver)

[transam]

Why are there those that have been living here for some time and still dont know the "rules" ? After all it's not that difficult a custom to understand and follow.

If you are older, you don't initiate the wai. If someone wais you then depending on their age and status you reciprocate with either a "nod and a smile" , a wai at chest level, a wai at chin level, (A wai higher than this is absolutely unnecessary unless you have just met your God.

The ridiculous myth that westerners should automatically wai all and sundry has been propagated by Thais and books such as Lonely Planet. ( I cringe every time I witness some westerner initiating a wai to the 7-11 staff or Tuk Tuk driver)

Perhaps these people you laugh at just want to show the natives that they are not one of the xxxxxxx influx, and are making an effort eh.

Edited March 10, 2013 by metisdead

[Dancealot]

Why are there those that have been living here for some time and still dont know the "rules" ? After all it's not that difficult a custom to understand and follow.

If you are older, you don't initiate the wai. If someone wais you then depending on their age and status you reciprocate with either a "nod and a smile" , a wai at chest level, a wai at chin level, (A wai higher than this is absolutely unnecessary unless you have just met your God.

The ridiculous myth that westerners should automatically wai all and sundry has been propagated by Thais and books such as Lonely Planet. ( I cringe every time I witness some westerner initiating a wai to the 7-11 staff or Tuk Tuk driver)

Perhaps these people you laugh at just want to show the natives that they are not one of the xxxxxxx influx, and are making an effort eh.

I agree with Mr. Transam; The Farang who wais at the 711 staff does not know any better, nevertheless he is making a positive effort to try to understand the rules. And i am positive this gesture will be returned with a wai because of this.

[nidieunimaitre]

I suppose at the end of the day it's all about the individual self.

my thinking is that there are two groups of people....

The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.

And the people that do not wai, only care about their own feelings.

Are you saying you wai your boss because you care about his feelings?

Are you saying you do not wai a 7 11 cashier because you do not care about their feelings?

[muythai2013]

Why are there those that have been living here for some time and still dont know the "rules" ? After all it's not that difficult a custom to understand and follow.

If you are older, you don't initiate the wai. If someone wais you then depending on their age and status you reciprocate with either a "nod and a smile" , a wai at chest level, a wai at chin level, (A wai higher than this is absolutely unnecessary unless you have just met your God.

The ridiculous myth that westerners should automatically wai all and sundry has been propagated by Thais and books such as Lonely Planet. ( I cringe every time I witness some westerner initiating a wai to the 7-11 staff or Tuk Tuk driver)

A higher wai does in fact apply to some,Royalty or Monks.

Why are there those that have been living here for some time and still dont know the "rules" ? After all it's not that difficult a custom to understand and follow, isn't that what you just wrote.

[shaggy1969]

I suppose at the end of the day it's all about the individual self.

my thinking is that there are two groups of people....

The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.

And the people that do not wai, only care about their own feelings.

Are you saying you wai your boss because you care about his feelings?

Are you saying you do not wai a 7 11 cashier because you do not care about their feelings?

Could you maybe explain to me how you came to this conclusion?

[nidieunimaitre]

I suppose at the end of the day it's all about the individual self.

my thinking is that there are two groups of people....

The people that do wai,care about other peoples feeling.

And the people that do not wai, only care about their own feelings.

Are you saying you wai your boss because you care about his feelings?

Are you saying you do not wai a 7 11 cashier because you do not care about their feelings?

Could you maybe explain to me how you came to this conclusion?

Do you care about everybody's feelings and wai everybody?

Or do you wai only some people - not caring about the unwaied people's feelings?

Let's keep it simple:

Do you wai an older, but incompetent boss? Why/ why not?

Do you wai a younger, but competent boss? Why/ why not?

[shaggy1969]

Could you maybe explain to me how you came to this conclusion?

Do you care about everybody's feelings and wai everybody?

Or do you wai only some people - not caring about the unwaied people's feelings?

Let's keep it simple:

Do you wai an older, but incompetent boss? Why/ why not?

Do you wai a younger, but competent boss? Why/ why not?

Hmmm,a tricky one seeing as though I don't have a Thai boss.

I would imagine that If I did have a Thai boss I would wai to an older one,regardless whether he/she was competent or not.

A younger Thai boss I would wai to if it was expected of me......If he/she was a good boss then I would do it willingly.

Older family members always get a wai from me and I always return the wai from younger family members but not the children.

The children when they wai to me always get a big smile and a wink (and usually a snack).

If introduce to someone by my family or friends and they are older than me,then I will wai them.

Likewise if I am introduced to someone who is younger,a wai will be returned.

Wai-ing to family and friends I only do on meeting them after a long period of not seeing and and on saying goodbye.

Other people that wai me (younger people) will always be acknowledged with a nod and a big smile

Hope that answers your questions.

Edited March 10, 2013 by shaggy1969

[nidieunimaitre]

Could you maybe explain to me how you came to this conclusion?

Do you care about everybody's feelings and wai everybody?

Or do you wai only some people - not caring about the unwaied people's feelings?

Let's keep it simple:

Do you wai an older, but incompetent boss? Why/ why not?

Do you wai a younger, but competent boss? Why/ why not?

Hmmm,a tricky one seeing as though I don't have a Thai boss.

I would imagine that If I did have a Thai boss I would wai to an older one,regardless whether he/she was competent or not.

A younger Thai boss I would wai to if it was expected of me......If he/she was a good boss then I would do it willingly.

Older family members always get a wai from me and I always return the wai from younger family members but not the children.

The children when they wai to me always get a big smile and a wink (and usually a snack).

If introduce to someone by my family or friends and they are older than me,then I will wai them.

Likewise if I am introduced to someone who is younger,a wai will be returned.

Wai-ing to family and friends I only do on meeting them after a long period of not seeing and and on saying goodbye.

Other people that wai me (younger people) will always be acknowledged with a nod and a big smile

Hope that answers your questions.

My nickname - and my philosophy - is nidieunimaitre.

That got me into trouble in Europe.

I do not plan to change.

And if that means I do not respect thai culture - ok - then it also means I do not respect farang culture.

Living from my pension makes it of course easy to not care about other people's culture......

[bangkokburning]

Could you maybe explain to me how you came to this conclusion?

Do you care about everybody's feelings and wai everybody?Or do you wai only some people - not caring about the unwaied people's feelings?Let's keep it simple:Do you wai an older, but incompetent boss? Why/ why not?Do you wai a younger, but competent boss? Why/ why not?

Hmmm,a tricky one seeing as though I don't have a Thai boss. I would imagine that If I did have a Thai boss I would wai to an older one,regardless whether he/she was competent or not.A younger Thai boss I would wai to if it was expected of me......If he/she was a good boss then I would do it willingly.Older family members always get a wai from me and I always return the wai from younger family members but not the children.The children when they wai to me always get a big smile and a wink (and usually a snack). If introduce to someone by my family or friends and they are older than me,then I will wai them.Likewise if I am introduced to someone who is younger,a wai will be returned.Wai-ing to family and friends I only do on meeting them after a long period of not seeing and and on saying goodbye. Other people that wai me (younger people) will always be acknowledged with a nod and a big smile Hope that answers your questions.

My nickname - and my philosophy - is nidieunimaitre.That got me into trouble in Europe.I do not plan to change.And if that means I do not respect thai culture - ok - then it also means I do not respect farang culture.Living from my pension makes it of course easy to not care about other people's culture......

Your government pension. Provided to you by all the people you disrespect - and them some others for a good measure of sociopathologic behavior.

While I would never do this mysrlf, I would like to point out something I saw yester in another mallI was in headed for BigC.

A young man under 30 walked out of a restaurant. He was wai'ed by the young, pretty greeter at the door. He returned the wai and itwas a fairly gracious as well. So, this goes against our farang common wisdom totally, mine as well.

Farang addressing Thai who does not understand English (well)

Farang yells louder. Loudness = better English comprehension.