Are You A Jealous Spouse?

[saroq]

I'm not gonna spend my time with someone I don't trust & who doesn't trust me. Been there, done that, and got out of that bad relationship (much too late). BTW, that was not a Thai lady.

My wife & I trust each other completely, there is no notion of checking up. If I find one day I made a big mistake, so be it. But it's better than living a bitter life of constant accusations & mistrust.

That about sums it up for me as well. I learned at a young age that the inability to trust someone else stems from the knowledge that you know that you yourself can't be trusted. Once you deal with that you can have trust in other people. But I don't know if it's just about trust either. It's also a change in my thinking and emotional response as I've aged. I'd be very surprised if I found out that my wife cheated on me but not devastated by it like a lot of younger people are. It just wouldn't be the end of my world.

[antiquepete]

I never phone. But saying that, l trust no one on this planet. My ''loving'' UK ex after 25 years taught me that, as well as other stuff. Sad I know but I ''was'' a very trusting bloke.

Both my U.K. exes did it for me one after 13 years the other after 32 years so now with tgf and will not be hit for half my assets if this one fails. I keep my atm card and bank book only in my name. A good friend advised me when I first came to Thailand "do not get into anything financial or emotional that you can't walk away from" great advice for any expat

[mca]

some even make them take picture with the group to verify they are not out with other men.

<deleted>

[barefoot1988]

both me and my wife call each other when we are out. but not verifying with each other friends or taking photographs etc etc which are imo insane.

we call each other mainly we eat home (ironically she is allergic to peanuts and im to garlic) and only had one car. so the calls are limited to picking up time, eating out or not, grocery and etc

[saroq]

Anyone who thinks/believes there is real trust is daft.

your old doris really did a number on you fella....have you thought about counselling?

It only hurts if you care transam.

[saroq]

My (Thai) husband and I rarely go out (living in outskirtrs of Bangkok) and rarely go out without each other.If he goes out is normally with his Aussie friend and Thai family to a concert.As for me I usually have something on the next day that I would rather do wihtout a hangover so i am happy to stay home.And no I never check up on him.He knows which side his bread is buttered on!

On the occasions I have been out by myself(in our 20 years of marriage)-no he does not phone or check.I will call if I am going to be later than planned.

It sounds boring but our usual night is a few Changs at home and a good old chat.

Oooooeeeerrrr.

I do hope he has a sense of humour should he read this

Did you mean that you both love, trust and respect each other?

Anyway, good luck to you both and may whatever it is that you have continues.

I don't see the problem. It could just as easily have been written by a farang guy and be just as true.

[saroq]

My boyfriend is 12 years older, we've been together for 10 years, are both farang and I've been in Bangkok for studies since beginning of January. He's flying here tonight. Do I need to say more?

Only what the point of your post was.

[theblether]

I can remember my ex wanting me to drive in to the city centre at 4.00am to collect her and her pals after a night out, " we stayed 20 miles away at the time ). I thought that would make me look like some mad weird jealous type.

I'd forgotten how much women love security, she loved the idea that she could walk straight out of the dancing into her family car, no hanging around waiting for some dodgy taxi that may never show up, or worse. I remember the first night I picked her and her pals up the conversation turned to another lady who's husband had picked her up at 12.00. I said I wasn't comfortable with the idea of hanging around waiting for them coming out, and I was assured that the difference was that he was the jealous type, making sure his women was in his bed that night, and she wasn't allowed to go dancing.

In my case I was giving the ladies the peace of mind that they could dance all night and know as soon as they walked into the street they would be safe. That was a lesson for me, and I made a point of never drinking when I knew the womenfolk in my family were in the City Centre of a night. There were a couple of occasions when I got the call to say the taxi hadn't showed and I was there within 20 mins.

I'm not the jealous type, it takes up too much effort and emotional energy, and quite frankly it's mental torture. If your that insecure in your relationship either get counselling or quit the relationship.

[Thakkar]

Mrs. T and I have been married for over twenty years. We've worked together, lived together and traveled together, as well as separately. We know each other so well, that often we don't even have to finish our sentences. Sometimes, a look and a smile is as good as a half-hour conversation.

So am I a jealous spouse? All I can say is: take my wife, please!

T

[mjj]

For me it's all about time. Mrs mjj can go out if she wants (although she rarely does) all I ask is for her to give me a time when she will be back. If she is going to be late, I ask her to call. I don't fret about where she is or who she is with, just about her safety.

Early in the relationship she said she would be an hour and came back 3 hours later. After this the rules were set. Works both ways as well.

[belg]

i guess it depends is your GF or wife is an ex bargirl or not, right .........

and if she is out with other ex-bargirls that all married "well" ...

i know one of those, and he is in a divorce now ... house 5 million + mansion 16 million + land in huahin 3 million + car 1 million + minivan 1 million ...

guess who it all belongs to ... not him anymore or ever

thanks to thai law of making it available for no education women to ripp off men till they are pennyless

[ragamuffin]

My boyfriend is 12 years older, we've been together for 10 years, are both farang and I've been in Bangkok for studies since beginning of January. He's flying here tonight. Do I need to say more?

Only what the point of your post was.

Jealousy and trust? Hello?

[Travel2003]

Not jealous, because I am a catch.

๊ืUnfortunately there is no such thing as a ''catch'' in LOS. Unless it is cash related. Do I assume your a rich guy. ......................................

I am an amazingly handsome man.

if this is your picture , then you better think again

Actually it is me, 30+ years ago.

lol

Just to make it clear, my statement about being a catch was meant as a dry joke.

[Travel2003]

What a load of <deleted>.

What is?

[Thongkorn]

There are many insecure so called men who live near me. only last week the Wife told me of her friend whos husband constantly phones her up if she is allowed to go out, The Thai lady in question has now disappeared off the face of the earth, her phone has been off for a week and her face book cancelled. The Guy in question forgot to tell her that he has 5 children and two ex wife's, But that's OK, and she has to contribute to the up keep of His house. Some men just don't get it with Thai women, they cannot except that they want to send money home to there family, that's the Thai custom Children take care of there parents, that's a big bone of contention with a lot of men who marry Thai lady's.

[transam]

Nooooooooooooo problems here.

[bostonboy]

i guess it depends is your GF or wife is an ex bargirl or not, right .........

and if she is out with other ex-bargirls that all married "well" ...

i know one of those, and he is in a divorce now ... house 5 million + mansion 16 million + land in huahin 3 million + car 1 million + minivan 1 million ...

guess who it all belongs to ... not him anymore or ever

thanks to thai law of making it available for no education women to ripp off men till they are pennyless

i've known countless guys that decided they wanted a "good thai girl" and ended up getting cheating on

actually, if i think about it........i probably know more guys who got screwed over by "good thai girls" than ex-bg's

my wife is ex-bg

her best friend is ex-bg who lives in Malaysia. my wife went solo to visit her friend

sounded like one of the most boring holidays one could do!

they basically ate and went to parks

[Jayroo]

My boyfriend is 12 years older, we've been together for 10 years, are both farang and I've been in Bangkok for studies since beginning of January. He's flying here tonight. Do I need to say more?

Yeah what's your point?

Bla?

Go away troll!

[Jayroo]

My boyfriend is 12 years older, we've been together for 10 years, are both farang and I've been in Bangkok for studies since beginning of January. He's flying here tonight. Do I need to say more?

Only what the point of your post was.

Jealousy and trust? Hello?

Which one is it then? is he the jealous type and it's eating him inside, so he is flying to BKK to keep an eye on you?

[britgent]

My boyfriend is 12 years older, we've been together for 10 years, are both farang and I've been in Bangkok for studies since beginning of January. He's flying here tonight. Do I need to say more?

Only what the point of your post was.

Jealousy and trust? Hello?

Yeah bit of a crap post there.

Sent from my i-mobile IQ 6A using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[Konini]

I don't know how people can live in a relationship without complete, utter trust.

My husband regularly rolls in at 6, 7, 8am. No questions, no need He just goes to bed and sleeps it off if he's been drinking (only about 50% of the time, the rest soda water). The only time I get a bit terse is if I wake up and he's not there and hasn't sent an SMS to let me know he's having breakfast and coming home or similar - just something letting me know he isn't lying in a gutter or hospital, but 99% of the time the SMS is there when I get up. I sometimes ask him where he's been but it's just making conversation really.

I got a lovely phone call yesterday at 1.15am. A Thai girl who speaks very good English claiming to be his girlfriend. Gave it away when I asked who she was and she said 'a girl - a bargirl' I know how much bargirls hate being referred to as bargirls. Obviously it's just someone one of us has pissed off trying to cause a bit of trouble. She wasn't happy that she didn't get the reaction she wanted. She said 'Why you no leave him?' and I'm very proud of my response, having been woken up and very groggy from a sleeping pill:

'Why you no leave him?'

'So that you can't have him all to yourself of course, silly girl'

I honestly think that's one of the best come-backs I've ever done.

Don't know if it was her or someone putting her up to it, but whoever it was will be very disappointed with my response. When I told my husband about it he laughed. No 'You don't believe it do you?' or 'I have no idea who she is'. He just laughed. Obviously not the reaction they wanted. I'm so proud of my comeback I'm putting this down as a positive experience.

No reaction (thank you theblethery for letting me talk it all the way through and put it into logical order yesterday) life goes on. Some people think I'm strange to react like this. I don't.

I'm not actively looking for the caller, but if I ever find out who was behind it, and I really think it was someone putting her up to it, God will not be able to help them. My weapon of choice is words, and I'm a master of my craft. A punch can leave a bruise that lasts a couple of weeks, one well worded sentence can enter the brain and haunt for a lifetime.

[somtampet]

i guess it depends is your GF or wife is an ex bargirl or not, right .........

and if she is out with other ex-bargirls that all married "well" ...

i know one of those, and he is in a divorce now ... house 5 million + mansion 16 million + land in huahin 3 million + car 1 million + minivan 1 million ...

guess who it all belongs to ... not him anymore or ever

thanks to thai law of making it available for no education women to ripp off men till they are pennyless

u know one, i dont know any but it sounds like its hundreds

[somtampet]

There are many insecure so called men who live near me. only last week the Wife told me of her friend whos husband constantly phones her up if she is allowed to go out, The Thai lady in question has now disappeared off the face of the earth, her phone has been off for a week and her face book cancelled. The Guy in question forgot to tell her that he has 5 children and two ex wife's, But that's OK, and she has to contribute to the up keep of His house. Some men just don't get it with Thai women, they cannot except that they want to send money home to there family, that's the Thai custom Children take care of there parents, that's a big bone of contention with a lot of men who marry Thai lady's.

Not always the case,my gf has only sent money when her younger brother had a stroke,we also bought a wheel chair, i contributed 50%.The reason for that is the older brother has been looking after him,hence he cant work.Normaly the 2 brothers work all over Thailand in the construction industry,and look after their mum very well,so my gf dont send money,they have enough.

[somtampet]

I don't know how people can live in a relationship without complete, utter trust.

My husband regularly rolls in at 6, 7, 8am. No questions, no need He just goes to bed and sleeps it off if he's been drinking (only about 50% of the time, the rest soda water). The only time I get a bit terse is if I wake up and he's not there and hasn't sent an SMS to let me know he's having breakfast and coming home or similar - just something letting me know he isn't lying in a gutter or hospital, but 99% of the time the SMS is there when I get up. I sometimes ask him where he's been but it's just making conversation really.

I got a lovely phone call yesterday at 1.15am. A Thai girl who speaks very good English claiming to be his girlfriend. Gave it away when I asked who she was and she said 'a girl - a bargirl' I know how much bargirls hate being referred to as bargirls. Obviously it's just someone one of us has pissed off trying to cause a bit of trouble. She wasn't happy that she didn't get the reaction she wanted. She said 'Why you no leave him?' and I'm very proud of my response, having been woken up and very groggy from a sleeping pill:

'Why you no leave him?'

'So that you can't have him all to yourself of course, silly girl'

I honestly think that's one of the best come-backs I've ever done.

Don't know if it was her or someone putting her up to it, but whoever it was will be very disappointed with my response. When I told my husband about it he laughed. No 'You don't believe it do you?' or 'I have no idea who she is'. He just laughed. Obviously not the reaction they wanted. I'm so proud of my comeback I'm putting this down as a positive experience.

No reaction (thank you theblethery for letting me talk it all the way through and put it into logical order yesterday) life goes on. Some people think I'm strange to react like this. I don't.

I'm not actively looking for the caller, but if I ever find out who was behind it, and I really think it was someone putting her up to it, God will not be able to help them. My weapon of choice is words, and I'm a master of my craft. A punch can leave a bruise that lasts a couple of weeks, one well worded sentence can enter the brain and haunt for a lifetime.

How did this bg have your number????/

[Konini]

I don't know how people can live in a relationship without complete, utter trust.

My husband regularly rolls in at 6, 7, 8am. No questions, no need He just goes to bed and sleeps it off if he's been drinking (only about 50% of the time, the rest soda water). The only time I get a bit terse is if I wake up and he's not there and hasn't sent an SMS to let me know he's having breakfast and coming home or similar - just something letting me know he isn't lying in a gutter or hospital, but 99% of the time the SMS is there when I get up. I sometimes ask him where he's been but it's just making conversation really.

I got a lovely phone call yesterday at 1.15am. A Thai girl who speaks very good English claiming to be his girlfriend. Gave it away when I asked who she was and she said 'a girl - a bargirl' I know how much bargirls hate being referred to as bargirls. Obviously it's just someone one of us has pissed off trying to cause a bit of trouble. She wasn't happy that she didn't get the reaction she wanted. She said 'Why you no leave him?' and I'm very proud of my response, having been woken up and very groggy from a sleeping pill:

'Why you no leave him?'

'So that you can't have him all to yourself of course, silly girl'

I honestly think that's one of the best come-backs I've ever done.

Don't know if it was her or someone putting her up to it, but whoever it was will be very disappointed with my response. When I told my husband about it he laughed. No 'You don't believe it do you?' or 'I have no idea who she is'. He just laughed. Obviously not the reaction they wanted. I'm so proud of my comeback I'm putting this down as a positive experience.

No reaction (thank you theblethery for letting me talk it all the way through and put it into logical order yesterday) life goes on. Some people think I'm strange to react like this. I don't.

I'm not actively looking for the caller, but if I ever find out who was behind it, and I really think it was someone putting her up to it, God will not be able to help them. My weapon of choice is words, and I'm a master of my craft. A punch can leave a bruise that lasts a couple of weeks, one well worded sentence can enter the brain and haunt for a lifetime.

How did this bg have your number????/

No idea. Obviously someone who know us - we are in serviced apartments and you can direct dial room to room or from outside phone the reception number and add room number on the end. I'm really not interested in finding who it was - the most annoying thing about this is it was at 1.15am and woke me up. One day something will just click into place and I'll know who it was and teach them a lesson in mind games, but I'm not wasting my time or energy worrying about who it was. Everything comes out in the end, if it doesn't Karma will pay them back. Obviously I've got a better life here - to do something like that, you must be carrying a lot of hate and negative energy around. I'm very happy and content.

Suppose it does sound odd to people who don't know me well, but I really don't care. If I find out who it is I'll have a bit fun, if not I know that they are unhappy and a malcontent, which would make their life not very nice. That's enough for me. Strange but true.

[pattayadingo]

March 29th g/f went to see her family. Comes back April 8th.

No problems at all for me because I know where she is. If I was jealous or untrusting I thik I'd have gone crazy with worry thinking about it.

Some of us are even happy to have a break from our other halves

If a woman is going to go off and leave you, she will, but there are plenty more fish in the sea.

[arthurwait]

I don't know how people can live in a relationship without complete, utter trust.

My husband regularly rolls in at 6, 7, 8am. No questions, no need He just goes to bed and sleeps it off if he's been drinking (only about 50% of the time, the rest soda water). The only time I get a bit terse is if I wake up and he's not there and hasn't sent an SMS to let me know he's having breakfast and coming home or similar - just something letting me know he isn't lying in a gutter or hospital, but 99% of the time the SMS is there when I get up. I sometimes ask him where he's been but it's just making conversation really.

I got a lovely phone call yesterday at 1.15am. A Thai girl who speaks very good English claiming to be his girlfriend. Gave it away when I asked who she was and she said 'a girl - a bargirl' I know how much bargirls hate being referred to as bargirls. Obviously it's just someone one of us has pissed off trying to cause a bit of trouble. She wasn't happy that she didn't get the reaction she wanted. She said 'Why you no leave him?' and I'm very proud of my response, having been woken up and very groggy from a sleeping pill:

'Why you no leave him?'

'So that you can't have him all to yourself of course, silly girl'

I honestly think that's one of the best come-backs I've ever done.

Don't know if it was her or someone putting her up to it, but whoever it was will be very disappointed with my response. When I told my husband about it he laughed. No 'You don't believe it do you?' or 'I have no idea who she is'. He just laughed. Obviously not the reaction they wanted. I'm so proud of my comeback I'm putting this down as a positive experience.

No reaction (thank you theblethery for letting me talk it all the way through and put it into logical order yesterday) life goes on. Some people think I'm strange to react like this. I don't.

I'm not actively looking for the caller, but if I ever find out who was behind it, and I really think it was someone putting her up to it, God will not be able to help them. My weapon of choice is words, and I'm a master of my craft. A punch can leave a bruise that lasts a couple of weeks, one well worded sentence can enter the brain and haunt for a lifetime.

How did this bg have your number????/

Put your phone down in the bar while you go to the loo or don't pay attention, they ring their phone from yours if no pin code or they have seen you enter it.

They know every trick going.

[Konini]

How did this bg have your number????/

Put your phone down in the bar while you go to the loo or don't pay attention, they ring their phone from yours if no pin code or they have seen you enter it.

They know every trick going.

The call came through the landline. It could either be someone in the building who knows our apartment number (dial the room number) or you can dial the main number for the building and add the room number onto the end and get straight through. Out of curiosity I asked downstairs if there was any way you could tell if the call was internal or external but there is no way of finding out.

I'm not wasting time worrying about it. I'm really only ticked off because I was woken in the middle of the night.

And I'm proud of my best ever come-back.

[rct99q]

My wife threatened she would leave me if I kept calling her....however it was usually 3am with me stinking drunk telling her I loved her. "I luv youbabe...." and her fast asleep at home.

Our only rules about keeping in touch is if you have been drinking call and get a ride and if you are going to be a LOT later than expected call.

See a lot of posters comment on westerners being the walking "ATM" or such things. Hear things like they only want you for your money or as long as you give them money they are happy. The biggest commitment you can offer is not "money" but trust. Money comes and goes but when you find that special person who you can love and trust. that is special.

[yoslim]

Sadly I'm always single so I can't get jealous and nobody calls me when I go out all night