Do Tourists All Think Expats Are Married To Ex-'working Girls'?

[Neeranam]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

Prostitutes are prostitutes and that never change. in thailand in the most of cases, that i know, women who prostitute themself isn't because of lack of opportunities but cuz is the easiest way to get money to go to siam, buy an iphone etc, i dont condem prostitution, in fact i think that prostitution is a social need, but for marrying a prostitute you must to be stupid or stupid, particularly when there are so many normal girls outhere. just imagine this: "Mom, this is my wife, Phoon, i met her in a Pattaya Bar, but i rescued her and she's a wonderful person". Hahahahahah:hit-the-fan:

Of course there's nothing wrong with prostitutes. I don't think anyone has said otherwise.

I've known a few in Scotland and many in Thailand. The job is the same here as it is there. Why do many think otherwise? Is it because they are more socially accepted here or those unaware of the social system here think they are more accepted? Maybe it's because there are so many of them. The fact is, a lot of men use, socialize, and marry them here but they wouldn't in their home country.

I would never have had one as a girlfriend in Scotland, but it seemed like a good idea here, briefly. Why? Maybe because I'd get so much stick from my mates there but not here.

I have a good friend who took his wife to meet me and she said, "I happy Jimmy bought me bar fine". He was not bothered and neither was I - they have been very happily married longer than me. Again, this would never happen in Scotland - " I'm so happy Jimmy picked me up down the harbour when he was kerb-crawling" - it just wouldn't happen, so why here?

Another thing - the ones I knew in Scotland was because we had a similar liking fora certain illegal substance. There are so many here that have similar addictions to drugs/alcohol. Much more than I ever though before I started visiting a drug rehab quite a few years back. Out of about 100, I only know of one that has managed to stay clean for more than 1 year. Very few see this tragic side to the profession. Bear this in mind when you hear, "they do it because it's an easy way to make money".

Edited May 3, 2013 by Neeranam

[Just1Voice]

Define prostitute. Is that were a women sleeps with a man for money? So after 20 years of marriage if the woman gets half a million dollar settlement does that make her a whore? Or is this term used only when its a cash transaction on the night?

Of course it doesn't make her a prostitute - prostitution is a job and involves sleeping with many men.

But if you sleep with one man for half a million then they arent? Just seems its a question of price and race. Google Rose Hancock who was a Filipina maid to a billionare Australian named Lang Hancock. It didnt take her long to jump in his bed. Interesting story. The general public all thought she was a whore. If she wasnt asian then it might have been a different opinion

No, I'd sleep with one man for half a million and I'm not a prostitute.

Sir Winston Churchill once asked a woman if she would have sex with him for a million dollars. She replies she would. He then asked if she would do it for 50 dollars. "What do you think I am, a prostitute" the woman asked. "Madam, we've already established that. Now we're just negotiating price," Sir Winston replied.

[jbrain]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

Prostitutes are prostitutes and that never change. in thailand in the most of cases, that i know, women who prostitute themself isn't because of lack of opportunities but cuz is the easiest way to get money to go to siam, buy an iphone etc, i dont condem prostitution, in fact i think that prostitution is a social need, but for marrying a prostitute you must to be stupid or stupid, particularly when there are so many normal girls outhere. just imagine this: "Mom, this is my wife, Phoon, i met her in a Pattaya Bar, but i rescued her and she's a wonderful person". Hahahahahah:hit-the-fan:

Of course there's nothing wrong with prostitutes. I don't think anyone has said otherwise.

I've known a few in Scotland and many in Thailand. The job is the same here as it is there. Why do many think otherwise? Is it because they are more socially accepted here or those unaware of the social system here think they are more accepted? Maybe it's because there are so many of them. The fact is, a lot of men use, socialize, and marry them here but they wouldn't in their home country.

I would never have had one as a girlfriend in Scotland, but it seemed like a good idea here, briefly. Why? Maybe because I'd get so much stick from my mates there but not here.

I have a good friend who took his wife to meet me and she said, "I happy Jimmy bought me bar fine". He was not bothered and neither was I - they have been very happily married longer than me. Again, this would never happen in Scotland - " I'm so happy Jimmy picked me up down the harbour when he was kerb-crawling" - it just wouldn't happen, so why here?

So if I read your latest post, the one above, I don't understand the point of your OP.

Accounting to your own statements above, the remark from the stranger you met was warranted for.

Maybe it's because there are so many of them. The fact is, a lot of men use, socialize, and marry them here but they wouldn't in their home country.

Now please don't switch my words as if I'm making any comments about your wife.

[thailandist]

"I joked that I hoped that my wife was never a bar prostitute" - That's the rub...you never know. You can only hope.

If you have lived here 12+ years you should know Pattaya is not the only hive in Thailand to get honey.

[JO1973]

Sadly, I have experienced the same thing from Asians. Not so much here -- thankfully (and I hope I won't) -- but in Vietnam, Cambodia, and China. The reaction is basically locals saying "No self-respecting Asian woman would be with a Westerner, she MUST be a prostitute." There are just as many ignorant s***heads in this part of the world as anywhere else.

[bigbamboo]

Very rude drinking company you had! Hope you said thank you and walked away!

Not all do, i think. But a lot of tourists are prejudiced, sadly.

I did make an exit about 10 minutes later. I joked that I hoped that my wife was never a bar prostitute thinking what an incredible xxxx the guy was.

How would others respond?

I would have cooly replied, "No. Was yours?"

[wilcopops]

What a ridiculous assumption.....everyone knows hardly any were bar girls.....they were cashiers!

[candypants]

Ex working girls? having seen some of the expat husbands around bangkok and more especially out of the capital, I would say many of the poor lasses still have their work cut out for them.

[CodyB]

Was the gentleman Scandinavian? They aren't know for their tact when it comes to discussing delicate matters.

If he's been travelling Thailand for 3 months, he is more than just a tourist, chances are he has had many encounters with prozzies.

[aussiebebe]

My take on this thread is that yes, most tourists do probably assume that westerner's Thai wives may have been prostitutes. I find it ironic that this is what captures their imagination; they'd be way more shocked if they knew what normal Thai women were like. Many, many Thai women don't expect to have to work, they expect maids to take care of their home and their children, then they expect to spend their days shopping and playing online games designed for prepubescent school kids. I'm not saying ex-bar girls don't do this, but as a percentage of women it's the least of things to worry about.

[BradinAsia]

Given the areas that tourists visit and that most foreigners meet their ladies because the ladies are also looking to meet them ,be it through the entertainment industry or on-line dating , I would say that the assumption is accurate.

It is also an assumption made by most Thais .

Are you talking about when a farang is walking down the street with a pole-dancer?

Surely, you don't believe most farangs' wives are ex-bargirls.

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

[Neeranam]

Given the areas that tourists visit and that most foreigners meet their ladies because the ladies are also looking to meet them ,be it through the entertainment industry or on-line dating , I would say that the assumption is accurate.

It is also an assumption made by most Thais .

Are you talking about when a farang is walking down the street with a pole-dancer?

Surely, you don't believe most farangs' wives are ex-bargirls.

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

They do have a certain persona that is easily recognizable if you've been here a few years.

Another thing that is a giveaway is when I meet a couple - the girl will not usually 'wai' me.

[BradinAsia]

Very rude drinking company you had! Hope you said thank you and walked away!

Not all do, i think. But a lot of tourists are prejudiced, sadly.

It is natural that "the world" has a very dim view of Thailand and many of it's people.

It is no secret that there are around 2 million engaged in the flesh trade, no surprises there. Forget the fact that it is illegal but what the he!! when has the law stopped anyone here from doing exactly whatever they want to do.

It is illegal to gamble in the realm (with one exception) and yet gambling is an industry in Thailand.

Corruption (and lying) are a way of life and 75% of Thais (as shown in a recent poll) believe that it is OK to do so "as long as they are getting a piece of the action"

So are tourists prejudiced? perhaps! but they have good reason to be so. The facts all speak for themselves.

Finally, I would think an 'ex hooker' might make an excellent wife if she is honest' which is defined as an oxymoron in itself.

This may not be the most biased, xenophobic post ever on TV, but it surely ranks in the top 5.

Problem is -- it looks like maybe a majority on here support this kind of poppycock. Actually, I'd

be very curious to know how many do. If that's not breaking any rules.

[Soutpeel]

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

and I think your delusional and it appears you know very little, if I had to put a number to it, I would say 60 to 70% of farangs have married "ex-bar girls" "cashier's in bars", "waitress'in a bar" or just use whatever symantic you want to use.

Oh and BTW how does one easily distingish an ex-bar girl...is it the secret wai they do or do they have the bar name tattooed on their bottom or the soles of their feet and does one get a receipt of proof of purchase from said bar ?

[jbrain]

So to put things into perspective.

I think the Thai population currently stands at 65 million, so it is fair to assume that half of that, or 32.5 million, are women

Someone above said that it is considered that 2 million are in the "service" industry, so indeed 15 times more or 30 million of them are having a normal job.

Now most of those 2 million , not all but let's say more than half,are located in tourist areas and very much of them get married or in some way related to a foreigner.

Are there any known figures about how many foreigners are married or have a relationship with a Thai lady ?

Edited May 3, 2013 by jbrain

[Ringmybells]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

AS you say its a job, so what is there to rescue her from?

Selling drugs is also a job so is being a hitman.

There are many ways to make easy money, but with easy money there are consequences.

Rescue those who were forced to join prostitution by poverty, being orphans, human trafficking etc.

[Soutpeel]

Another thing that is a giveaway is when I meet a couple - the girl will not usually 'wai' me.

If your lower class than said lady she may not wai you either, because your lower class and not worthy...

[lemoncake]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

AS you say its a job, so what is there to rescue her from?

Selling drugs is also a job so is being a hitman.

There are many ways to make easy money, but with easy money there are consequences.

Rescue those who were forced to join prostitution by poverty, being orphans, human trafficking etc.

You must be from Philippines.

Thai females are not forced into anything and there are thousands of jobs out there.

Poverty? There are million of people worldwide who are poor and do not become prostitutes or drug dealers.

[lemoncake]

Another thing that is a giveaway is when I meet a couple - the girl will not usually 'wai' me.

If your lower class than said lady she may not wai you either, because your lower class and not worthy...

Have to disagree there, unless one looks like a street bum. Many bar girls would not wei a foreigner,though funny enough there are enough idiots to wei bar girls and gogo dancers while she is on the stage naked

[jbrain]

Another thing that is a giveaway is when I meet a couple - the girl will not usually 'wai' me.

If your lower class than said lady she may not wai you either, because your lower class and not worthy...

How they define which foreigner is lower class

[BradinAsia]

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

and I think your delusional and it appears you know very little, if I had to put a number to it, I would say 60 to 70% of farangs have married "ex-bar girls" "cashier's in bars", "waitress'in a bar" or just use whatever symantic you want to use.

Oh and BTW how does one easily distingish an ex-bar girl...is it the secret wai they do or do they have the bar name tattooed on their bottom or the soles of their feet and does one get a receipt of proof of purchase from said bar ?

This is becoming rather comical.

I suspect that farangs who've never lived outside a tourist area may not be able to

distinguish between a bargirl and a regular Thai lady. If, however, you've lived in

non-tourist areas as long as I have, you would not have this problem.

Also, if your experience is mostly tourist/bar areas, maybe that would explain why

your sample is skewed, i.e., most farangs you know hang out in those same areas.

Edited May 3, 2013 by BradinAsia

[jbrain]

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

and I think your delusional and it appears you know very little, if I had to put a number to it, I would say 60 to 70% of farangs have married "ex-bar girls" "cashier's in bars", "waitress'in a bar" or just use whatever symantic you want to use.

Oh and BTW how does one easily distingish an ex-bar girl...is it the secret wai they do or do they have the bar name tattooed on their bottom or the soles of their feet and does one get a receipt of proof of purchase from said bar ?

This is becoming rather comical.

I suspect that farangs who've never lived outside a tourist area may not be able to

distinguish between a bargirl and a regular Thai lady. If, however, you've lived in

non-tourist areas as long as I have, you would not have this problem.

Do you have any number about what percentage of foreigners live outside the tourist area compared to the ones that live in tourist areas.

My guess is that it would be a low figure.

Then how many of those have decided to live there after they met their wife in the tourist areas.

I have no doubts that the latter percentage will be higher than the first one.

[Soutpeel]

If you think most foreigners meet their future wives in bars, no wonder your have

screwy assumptions.

Thais don't automatically assume that the farang's lady is a former BG. The don't

have to assume. They'll usually know at first glance if she is a former bargirl or not.

I'm not Thai but even I can easily distinguish the ex-bargirls in most cases.

and I think your delusional and it appears you know very little, if I had to put a number to it, I would say 60 to 70% of farangs have married "ex-bar girls" "cashier's in bars", "waitress'in a bar" or just use whatever symantic you want to use.

Oh and BTW how does one easily distingish an ex-bar girl...is it the secret wai they do or do they have the bar name tattooed on their bottom or the soles of their feet and does one get a receipt of proof of purchase from said bar ?

This is becoming rather comical.

I suspect that farangs who've never lived outside a tourist area may not be able to

distinguish between a bargirl and a regular Thai lady. If, however, you've lived in

non-tourist areas as long as I have, you would not have this problem.

I have never lived in tourist area in the 12 years I have been here....have in fact been very surprised when i have found out that certain young ladies, who have a good education, wai farangs and do all the things "good" Thai girls are suppose to do, are on the game or have been on the game...

so please take your all knowing generalisations and...you know the rest.

[somchaimaidai]

ALL Thai girls married to 'foreigners' are 'working girls'. Sorry to break the illusion but its not that difficult to understand.

[Ringmybells]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

Prostitutes are prostitutes and that never change. in thailand in the most of cases, that i know, women who prostitute themself isn't because of lack of opportunities but cuz is the easiest way to get money to go to siam, buy an iphone etc, i dont condem prostitution, in fact i think that prostitution is a social need, but for marrying a prostitute you must to be stupid or stupid, particularly when there are so many normal girls outhere. just imagine this: "Mom, this is my wife, Phoon, i met her in a Pattaya Bar, but i rescued her and she's a wonderful person". Hahahahahah

Hmmm, people change, we all change, prostitutes stop selling their body at one point I guess. I don't promote prostitution nor condemn it. I don't judge prostitutes or those foreign men who marry them. Where they meet and how much they want to tell their parents of their first encounter its non of my business or his/her parents business. What's most important is that they share the love and happiness together

[woelke]

I would ask him directly if he uses cialis or viagra; after all man that old can't get it up, right?

Edited May 3, 2013 by woelke

[Soutpeel]

Another thing that is a giveaway is when I meet a couple - the girl will not usually 'wai' me.

If your lower class than said lady she may not wai you either, because your lower class and not worthy...

How they define which foreigner is lower class

they just know...same as some of the poster on TV who can spot who is and isnt BG from a thousand paces...

[SteeleJoe]

Sir Winston Churchill once asked a woman if she would have sex with him for a million dollars. She replies she would. He then asked if she would do it for 50 dollars. "What do you think I am, a prostitute" the woman asked. "Madam, we've already established that. Now we're just negotiating price," Sir Winston replied.

It is highly unlikely Churchill ever said it. It was almost certainly a joke going around since the 30's (featuring Lord Beaverbrook) that turned into an urban legend and it has since featured lots of famous folk (though Churchill may be the most widely believed).

But it is a good one: witty and contains a truth.

[Ringmybells]

I am a woman from a third world country. Thank God my parents could support me through school and college. I have a master's degree, fall in love with an old man. I have been married to an American old man for about 11 years. We are right now travelling all over Thailand. I have met many many gorgeous and not so gorgeous Thai ladies married to foreign guys. I met them through an International school where my children are enrolled. I find Thai ladies to be very attractive and some of them very honest about their past. I was speechless when some of them told me flat on my face that they met their farang husband in Patpong where they worked as bar girls. Sorry guys, considering the size of sex industry in Thailand I don't blame tourists for thinking that all expats are married to ex prostitutes...and so what if you did. Prostitutes are human, prostitution is a job, it is not a sin to fall in love with an honest prostitute and be her rescuer! End of story.

AS you say its a job, so what is there to rescue her from?

Selling drugs is also a job so is being a hitman.

There are many ways to make easy money, but with easy money there are consequences.

Rescue those who were forced to join prostitution by poverty, being orphans, human trafficking etc.

You must be from Philippines.

Thai females are not forced into anything and there are thousands of jobs out there.

Poverty? There are million of people worldwide who are poor and do not become prostitutes or drug dealers.

My across the street neighbor said she was force into Patpong as a teenager and an orphan. I am not from Phillipines I am from India. I have been here for a few months (travelling around the world) and I don't claim to be an expert on anything 'Thai'

[Khun Watchaporn]

Quite impossible, I would have thought, as all Thai prostitutes, nay all Thai women, also have a small penis strapped away somewhere.

Apparently.