Farangs - are we all the same in Thai Eyes?

[His Masters Voice]

My Thai Wife and I were having a fight last week.

She was upset about something a friend of mine did to his Thai girlfriend and decided to take it out on me - <deleted> -

(The wife and my friends' girlfriend are close - they call each other sister as is usual in Thailand)

I'm thinking, why are you upset with me, I didn't do anything wrong - female logic, I'll never understand -

I said to her, that it wasn't me and he (English) came from a different country.

That's when her eyes narrowed and slightly snarled, you all same. All Farang same, same.

Well, that said, seemed to release the steam and after the silence for an hour or two, she was back to normal.

Later I asked her if she meant what she said or was she just pissed with my friend.

Her answer surprised me - most Farang same. English same, German man same, American - all same.

In her eyes, maybe Farangs - we are all the same.

So, do you think that, on the whole, most of our Cultures are the same?

Are we in the Western World basically the same - if not - what are our differences - from a Thai perspective?

No need to discuss the wife, not a BG, no Chinese - but a thai Temper, I'll grant you that.

Edited July 2, 2013 by His Masters Voice

[Berkshire]

Reading the various threads on this forum, it's pretty apparent that all (or, many) farangs see all Thais as being the same. One Thai bad, all Thais bad. But when the tables are turned....

To answer your question, it's rather typical that people stereotype members of other groups. I'd imagine that Thais group farangs together to a certain extent, the same way they'd group the Japanese/Koreans together, or Indians, or the Chinese, or Isaan folks, etc. It's human nature.

In your case, it wasn't a random farang, but your friend. Friends tend to have a similar way of thinking, wouldn't you agree? Did you take his side? Did you defend his actions?

[MrRed]

IF the shit hits the fan Thais will stick together no matter what the situation and no matter if they are in the wrong.Thai rak Thai.

[farang000999]

She has probably had some bad experiences before you with other farang.

[benalibina]

A simple mind is a joy forever !

[Gsxrnz]

No we're not all the same in the eyes of all Thais, and neither are all Thais the same in the eyes of all non-Thai. To think otherwise is a sweeping bigoted generalisation that defies all logic.

Sure, in an argument anybody of any race or gender may say something like she said. How many times have we heard "all men are the same", "all (insert any nationality) are the same". How many times do men say "all women are the same".

To say something like this is purely a weapon used in an argument - usually by somebody unable to articulate the real feelings or emotions they have, or logically debate the real issues.

[mickjn]

IF the shit hits the fan Thais will stick together no matter what the situation and no matter if they are in the wrong.Thai rak Thai.

Even if they do not know the other person/people/farangs they close ranks and stick like shit to a blanket

[farang000999]

IF the shit hits the fan Thais will stick together no matter what the situation and no matter if they are in the wrong.Thai rak Thai.

Even if they do not know the other person/people/farangs they close ranks and stick like shit to a blanket

Not in my experience.

[David48]

Am I rude to kick back, snigger a little bit, and think ... 'Poor Bugger'

Glad it's you and not me ...

.

Edited July 2, 2013 by David48

[Scottythai]

I think it depends on the person. Sure some Thai's will say all Farang same. Others will say we are all very different. I think that can be said about any culture it always boils down to an indivdual and their belief. At home in Canada I have friends who can't figure why I would move to Thailand, but they have never left B.C. So it's a pure case by case thing. And I would not classify it to being all one culture things about all another culture.

[arthurwait]

it's called education or having a bad day.

Edited July 2, 2013 by arthurwait

[joeaverage]

ironically, the OP's question presupposes all thais are the same

[Berkshire]

No we're not all the same in the eyes of all Thais, and neither are all Thais the same in the eyes of all non-Thai. To think otherwise is a sweeping bigoted generalisation that defies all logic.

Have you visited the Thailand News forum lately?

[Berkshire]

ironically, the OP's question presupposes all thais are the same

Good point.

[theblether]

OP, if you're going to get in trouble for nothing you may as well prove her right.

[richard_smith237]

You have to wonder what quality of relationship (communication, mutual respect etc) the Op has with his wife.

"All Farang the same" certainly leads the reader to a less than complimentary image.

In answer to the Ops question: No, Thai's certainly don't think all Westerners are the same, much in the same way many folk back home can readily differentiate between the ignorant and polite from any nation.

[richard_smith237]

Double p

Edited July 2, 2013 by richard_smith237

[richard_smith237]

IF the shit hits the fan Thais will stick together no matter what the situation and no matter if they are in the wrong.Thai rak Thai.

Even if they do not know the other person/people/farangs they close ranks and stick like shit to a blanket

With attitudes like this its hardly a surprise that some Westerners are disrespected and tarred with the same brush...

Each nation or race has its own lowest common denominator...

So, perhaps a more accurate answer may be that Thai's do much what folk of any other nation do. They place people into 'boxes' / 'brackets'....

I.e. respectable business man, sex tourist, back packer, retiree etc...

But perhaps more simply Thai's may initially draw a more simple initial opinion (much as anyone else might): Good or Bad....

[kikoman]

I believe that the OP's problem is much deeper than just an argument about his friend, for his wife to lump all falang's together as being the same.

She may be trying to convey a message to him about his ideas and behavior, (I am not saying that is the case) just offering a different perspective.

All people have disagreements and arguments, about one's specific actions or ideas, to attack a partner solely based on a friends problems. Seems to indicate there is another reason for equating him with all the other falang's.

Just my dos centavos (2 cents).

Cheers:

[Gsxrnz]

No we're not all the same in the eyes of all Thais, and neither are all Thais the same in the eyes of all non-Thai. To think otherwise is a sweeping bigoted generalisation that defies all logic.

Have you visited the Thailand News forum lately?

You'll have to enlighten me.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Rule 1

If you are a foreigner, you must never allow your Thai partner to meet or interact with your foreign friends Thai partners.

Unless, of course, you are happy to get into this sort of shit.

Rule 2

If you broke 'Rule 1' (as you did) when the upset happens (as it invariably will) you must find some excuse to immediately rush out of the house using any bullshit excuse (like: Oh, I forgot my passport at the office), then fail to return home until the next morning. Finding said partner either , gone for good (no big loss), of extremely happy to see you (make-up sex).

Rule 3

Never ever argue, explain or discuss. Thais find all three actions extremely confrontational and will look on it as a declaration of total war.

Edited July 2, 2013 by AnotherOneAmerican

[Tchooptip]

Rule 1

If you are a foreigner, you must never allow your Thai partner to meet or interact with your foreign friends Thai partners.

Unless, of course, you are happy to get into this sort of shit.

Rule 2

If you broke 'Rule 1' (as you did) when the upset happens (as it invariably will) you must find some excuse to immediately rush out of the house using any bullshit excuse (like: Oh, I forgot my passport at the office), then fail to return home until the next morning. Finding said partner either , gone for good (no big loss), of extremely happy to see you (make-up sex).

Rule 3

Never ever argue, explain or discuss. Thais find all three actions extremely confrontational and will look on it as a declaration of total war.

You have a very stange vision of the relationship with a Thai partner/wife

rule 1 in fact is to put your partner in a cage, "you must never allow your Thai partner to meet or interact with your foreign friends"

rule 2 being so stupidly macho I will not comment,

rule 3, never argue is understandable, but never explain or discuss Thai will find those two actions confrontational...decaration of total war for explanation or discussion, from where your own experience with Thai people come from, prison? mafia? lunatic asylum ? telling me you know better for you'r half Thai will not convince me!

[H1w4yR1da]

Am I rude to kick back, snigger a little bit, and think ... 'Poor Bugger'

Glad it's you and not me ...

.

My thoughts exactly!

[nattydread]

I hate them all......they are uncivilised ignorant uneducated fools who would sell their mothers for a few thousand baht

the only reason I stay here is the all year round sunshine and cheap living and of course cheap beautiful women 20 years younger than me

I think most on here would secretly agree with me if they were honest with themselves

[Suradit69]

ironically, the OP's question presupposes all thais are the same

That's a common feature of the Us versus THEM threads that run over and over and over again.

If there is any disagreement or misunderstanding between a farang and a Thai, it's automatically assumed that all farang are being challenged by all Thais, carefully ignoring the fact that most farang aren't all that thrilled with other farang and Thais have differing opinions ( and differing education levels and different backgrounds and ...)

Supposedly THEY don't want US here, which is a popular topic that assumes that THEY all spend their days thinking about complete strangers. In recent threads a disagreement between one farang and one Thai driver demonstrated conclusively that THEY don't like US. And there is the thread that supposedly proves that THEY cannot use maps, with the tacit assumption that all of US can (because all farang are apparently so well educated, ha , ha).

How insecure can people be that there seems to be no end to the threads based on the theory that THEY don't love US? I mean seriously, back in Farang Utopia where homogeneity supposedly reigns, does everyone love one another and never engage in irrational arguments? If you were that beloved how could the people at home have allowed you to abandon them. Surely by now they've gone on hunger strikes and pined away to nothingness at your absence.

And considering that in western countries divorce is outpacing marriage, how can that be when all farang are totally sympatico with one another?

Edited July 2, 2013 by Suradit69

[MacChine]

^^

Yep, it's the younger women thing mostly, I suspect, kinda pigeon-holes a certain type of foreign male, and contributes to all foreigners as suspect.

Edited July 2, 2013 by MacChine

[Maybole]

I think it is all down to education. Very little geography is taught in Thai schools(see recent post on map reading and navigation skills). My wife of 30 years still cannot tell the difference between 2 Europeans nor between European and North American. We All look and act the same to her. All dark skinned people are " negro" to her, and Arab and "Kek" are mutually indistinguishabl.e

[2008bangkok]

Lets put it this way, iv ready plenty of articles of thai men joining in givin a kickin to a farang they don't even know just because they like to take the opportunity to join in on a fighting a farang it doesn't matter if that farang is 20 or 65 they will get the same either way.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

And considering that in western countries divorce is outpacing marriage, how can that be when all farang are totally sympatico with one another?

That's because US is men, and THEM is women.

[Berkshire]

Lets put it this way, iv ready plenty of articles of thai men joining in givin a kickin to a farang they don't even know just because they like to take the opportunity to join in on a fighting a farang it doesn't matter if that farang is 20 or 65 they will get the same either way.

Well I keep hearing this as well...but have never seen it. I'll believe it when I see it. What I do see is when a farang gets a whoopin, he usually brings it upon himself. It's never a completely innocent farang. Never.