What would you do?

[Skint]

I would also not let her influence you too much as you may regret it later. Just tell her the way it is.

[enyaw]

This is too obvious this one

obvious how? does that mean you would go back to Thailand to work without the security or career path or stay in the UK and continue with trying to get a visa sorted/long periods away from each other? Pray tell?

Sorry it's not too obvious is it but never get yourself into a postion in Thailand where you are not even earning as you say a dime. I can see your problem here now, stay in the Uk and watch your pennies.

We all know how it all works but sometimes it's just so blatant!

Edited October 6, 2013 by enyaw

[bendovid]

Recently I was reading a quote from Anthony Hopkins where he reckoned we all think too much.

The answer to this question is the same as to the others. What is your gut telling you to do?

When we arrived back in Aust after getting married in Bangkok in Sept 85, I had $500 left in my bank account, and that was it, all up. Nowhere to live as yet, I had to borrow money from the Navy to pay the bond and deposit on my flat. I had a 10 YO Step Daughter, and a son came along about 18 months later.

In the beginning Navy Welfare sent round a young 3rd Year Uni Student to help my wife settle in to her new country and show her the ropes, teach her how to catch a train, go shopping etc. After a few days she baled out as my wife ended up showing her around and sorting things out for the two of them. LOL.

It wasn't easy. But we managed.

We were just reminscing about those days last night.

I agree with that quote..i have never thought so much as in the last year i must admit..it;s because I have to think a lot to make this relationship work..there has been a lot to work out logistically and a lot of hard work to get myself back into UK and working to make a future for us both here..believe me it has been a headache! My gut tells me we should make a life here and not to go back to work in Bangkok but my head knows that she really wants me to come back to work in Thailand..at least she does presently-it is her trying to persuade me to come back and work there again that has caused all the confusion. She does not really want to come to the UK. She would much prefer me to go back..but my gut tells me no..get her here..give it a try first and she may well change her feelings and we may well have more chance to have secure and happy future..My gut also tells me that if she can't give it a try here then it may never work between us..

[bendovid]

My questions to the OP is:

What sort of accommodation does he have in the UK?

Does his Thai wife have a good command of the English language, both verbal and written?

Is the OP`s employment in the UK permanent and secure?

Does he belong to any pension of insurance schemes, have assets and any savings in the UK?

These are some of the questions that will be asked by the FCO as regards to their decision to allow his wife into the UK, because they have to ensure that foreigners will not need to make claims for welfare benefits later on.

My advice to the OP is; not to get his wife pregnant at this time, and sorry to say, that I cannot see much of a future for this relationship, because I have seen all this before, where a farang falls in love with a Thai girl, wants to take her back home with him, but has no or little collateral assets and mostly lives month by month on a pay packet.

As for the question; what would you do? I would just be realistic, that`s all.

Hi, I own a nice flat in central london that I currently rent out. Yes ,my wife has a good command of English. Yes, my employment is secure. No apart from my property which has around £120,000 equity in it I do not have a pension but I believe what I have just confirmed will make us eligible for the visa. Furthermore, I don't live month by month on a paypacket..I earn enough already to live nicely and save money every month also-I am currently taking home £3000 per month after tax+commission on top equalling another £500-1500. So our life here would certainly not be short of money..My concern in staying in the UK is not money or so much getting a visa..it is moreover that I am not sure she will like it here and the visa process is also giving us both a lot of stress personally and in our relationship so I sometimes think it would be better going back before more damage is done between us..she is very upset with waiting and waiting..and also wants me to go back there more than her coming here..The worries I have going back to Thailand are about money though and saving money for the future..it is there that I have to live month by month...not in the UK..

[bendovid]

There is no need to apply for a visit visa first. You can go straight for the settlement if you want to, and if you already meet the current income requirements.

Also, if you do decide to go for a visit visa first, and your wife likes the idea of settlement in the UK, there is no need to wait 6 months before applying for a settlement on her return to Thailand.

As for whether or not you both will be happier in Thailand, or the UK, that's for you both to decide. Which, in fairness should mean that you postpone that decision until your wife has a chance to comment on her life in the UK, which would be best done if she could work and play a full part in your life there. And that in turn would point to a settlement visa which allows her to work from day one of her arrival.

It does take longer to process, but is more valuable once approved.

I wish you luck in whatever you both choose to do.

Hi, I have been advised by quite a few visa services based in Thailand that it is a lot easier to get the settlement visa once they have seen proof that your wife has visited your country as a tourist first.. I have also been advised that you need to wait 6 months in between visa applications..ie. no more than one per year. I agree that it would be a good idea to try the visit visa first though..then I guess at least I will be sure if she does like it here or not..

[benalibina]

Recently I was reading a quote from Anthony Hopkins where he reckoned we all think too much.

The answer to this question is the same as to the others. What is your gut telling you to do?

When we arrived back in Aust after getting married in Bangkok in Sept 85, I had $500 left in my bank account, and that was it, all up. Nowhere to live as yet, I had to borrow money from the Navy to pay the bond and deposit on my flat. I had a 10 YO Step Daughter, and a son came along about 18 months later.

In the beginning Navy Welfare sent round a young 3rd Year Uni Student to help my wife settle in to her new country and show her the ropes, teach her how to catch a train, go shopping etc. After a few days she baled out as my wife ended up showing her around and sorting things out for the two of them. LOL.

It wasn't easy. But we managed.

We were just reminscing about those days last night.

I agree with that quote..i have never thought so much as in the last year i must admit..it;s because I have to think a lot to make this relationship work..there has been a lot to work out logistically and a lot of hard work to get myself back into UK and working to make a future for us both here..believe me it has been a headache! My gut tells me we should make a life here and not to go back to work in Bangkok but my head knows that she really wants me to come back to work in Thailand..at least she does presently-it is her trying to persuade me to come back and work there again that has caused all the confusion. She does not really want to come to the UK. She would much prefer me to go back..but my gut tells me no..get her here..give it a try first and she may well change her feelings and we may well have more chance to have secure and happy future..My gut also tells me that if she can't give it a try here then it may never work between us..

She wont come to UK, she does not perceive, love, you the way you want her to. She controls you and your emotions. Sorry to say. Step out while you can. Even if you go back to thailand it is most likely a matter of time before it will happen. Good luck. Only live once though !

[Thai at Heart]

My first reaction to this topic is that it must be somewhat scary for pensioners to see how expensive Thailand is getting and that a guy can just walk into a telephone sales job and make 100,000 a month. When I first came to Thailand in 2004 it seemed teachers made 30k baht a month now many seem to claim to make multiples of that. At this rates, the pensioners are going to have a very hard time maintaining themselves in Thailand on a fixed income.

100k with kids, cars, and houses in tow doesn't get close to being enough in Bangkok.

The op went be much use to anyone if he can't get the situation completely safe financially. Stay in the UK.

[Thai at Heart]

There is no need to apply for a visit visa first. You can go straight for the settlement if you want to, and if you already meet the current income requirements.

Also, if you do decide to go for a visit visa first, and your wife likes the idea of settlement in the UK, there is no need to wait 6 months before applying for a settlement on her return to Thailand.

As for whether or not you both will be happier in Thailand, or the UK, that's for you both to decide. Which, in fairness should mean that you postpone that decision until your wife has a chance to comment on her life in the UK, which would be best done if she could work and play a full part in your life there. And that in turn would point to a settlement visa which allows her to work from day one of her arrival.

It does take longer to process, but is more valuable once approved.

I wish you luck in whatever you both choose to do.

Hi, I have been advised by quite a few visa services based in Thailand that it is a lot easier to get the settlement visa once they have seen proof that your wife has visited your country as a tourist first.. I have also been advised that you need to wait 6 months in between visa applications..ie. no more than one per year. I agree that it would be a good idea to try the visit visa first though..then I guess at least I will be sure if she does like it here or not..

I wouldn't take what any agency has to say about anything as true.

[bendovid]

If you have enough income to stay in Thailand, stay. If you take her to the UK, you risk her becoming just like the women some of us come here to get away from.

Also, is she a family oriented person? If so, not even a starter for relocating. Everytime one of them gets sick, she'll be on a plane back, or driving you crazy.

The income I can get if I go back to the job I had before(which won't last forever) is enough to live well in Bangkok but not extravagantly in any way and does not allow me more importantly to save much each month so there is not ,much security in the situation as I do not have savings to fall back on..just my property that I own in London..She is a family oriented person..I have hardly met a single thai who is not though and your comments though true in some respects are a little harsh on that front..and a little harsh on UK women too..I never went to thaiand to get away from british women..there are good and bad women all over the world..

[bendovid]

My first reaction to this topic is that it must be somewhat scary for pensioners to see how expensive Thailand is getting and that a guy can just walk into a telephone sales job and make 100,000 a month. When I first came to Thailand in 2004 it seemed teachers made 30k baht a month now many seem to claim to make multiples of that. At this rates, the pensioners are going to have a very hard time maintaining themselves in Thailand on a fixed income.

I didn't just walk into a 100,000 a month telesales job..It took a lot of searching to find the opportunity and I was the best salesman there and so earnt more commission than the average employess-50,000 baht basic and the rest was commission..Having said that 100,000 a month in Bangkok is not a great deal when you factor in wanting to lay down roots in Thailand and have children etc..and opportunities to make more than 100,000 are sparse..

[bifftastic]

There is no need to apply for a visit visa first. You can go straight for the settlement if you want to, and if you already meet the current income requirements.

Also, if you do decide to go for a visit visa first, and your wife likes the idea of settlement in the UK, there is no need to wait 6 months before applying for a settlement on her return to Thailand.

As for whether or not you both will be happier in Thailand, or the UK, that's for you both to decide. Which, in fairness should mean that you postpone that decision until your wife has a chance to comment on her life in the UK, which would be best done if she could work and play a full part in your life there. And that in turn would point to a settlement visa which allows her to work from day one of her arrival.

It does take longer to process, but is more valuable once approved.

I wish you luck in whatever you both choose to do.

Hi, I have been advised by quite a few visa services based in Thailand that it is a lot easier to get the settlement visa once they have seen proof that your wife has visited your country as a tourist first.. I have also been advised that you need to wait 6 months in between visa applications..ie. no more than one per year. I agree that it would be a good idea to try the visit visa first though..then I guess at least I will be sure if she does like it here or not..

HI there. That advice, not unusually for visa service agents based in Thailand, is completely and utterly incorrect.

The evidence required for a settlement visa is;

Finances (you need to be able to show that you have an income of over £18,600 per year) there is a time element to that, which I will find out more details of for you.

Accommodation that is suitable for you both (you have a flat in London, which would meet that requirement)

The applicant (your wife) needs to have passed an English language test to a certain level (again, details of that are easy to find)

A TB 'clear' certificate.

The last two documents need to be from approved sources. But that's not too hard to do either.

Marriage certificates, and some evidence that your marriage isn't solely for the visa. You can do that too.

That's it. You either meet those requirements, or you don't. There's no "hmm she's never been there before, I think I'll refuse it on those grounds"

Any refusal has to be based on the Immigration rules, not what some people in a visa agent's office have dreamed up to get more money from you.

As for the 6 months thing, there is guidance (and it is only guidance, it's not a rule) that visitors should only spend 6 months out of 12 in the UK, but if your wife is applying for a settlement visa, then she is no longer a visitor.

I will, if you like, give you the details of where you can find this information for yourself.

I also agree that it might be a good idea for your wife to visit the UK in order to find out if she could settle here. The fact that she hasn't been here yet might have something to do with her reluctance to commit to moving here.

I always advise people to choose the visa that suits their circumstances, rather than change their circumstances to suit the visa process.

If you want your wife to settle here, or at least have some idea of what it would be like to do so, then you might consider applying for a Family Visit Visa for her.

That would give her some kind of insight into what her life would be like if she lived here full time, but she would not be able to work. If you both decided that she would like to live here, and you had everything in place for the settlement application (it's not hugely different) she could apply as soon as she went back to Thailand. It does take about 3 months to get a decision though (visit visa is about 2 weeks in my experience, my wife has had 3 Family Visit Visas)

But once you meet the requirements and have submitted all the documentation that proves that you do, you can be fairly sure of success.

As I said before, there's no real room for judgement on the part of the ECO (Entry Clearance Officer) for a settlement visa, you either meet the requirements, or you don't.

Even if you both decide to give it a go living in the UK (with your wife able to work and contribute to your lives fully) and it doesn't work out, you can then both decide to move back to Thailand. Presumably you will have had some time to save a bit of money too, seeing as you're earning quite well here. Although I do know how London can eat your money quite quickly I live there too.

Anyway, if you want to ditch the dodgy agent's advice, and find out how it really works, drop me a PM and I'll point you in the right direction (where I'll be pointing you is a completely free resource with information from people who have done exactly what you're trying to do, and I have nothing to gain from it personally).

Just thought I'd add that disclaimer!

[allucero]

Thai ladies will follow the money. This is spoken by a 11 year marriage to a Thai woman, By A Thai Woman...

[Suradit69]

At your age you desperately need to build up your capital. You WILL need it later. Best advice is to work in the UK, or wherever you can work and save the most.

Your need for money in the future should outweigh any other consideration.

Take steps to have your gf with you. If it doesn't work out with her, don't worry...plenty more available. But, remember the law in the UK relating to what happens upon break-up of a relationship can potentially be ruinous to you financially. From that point of view it's better to leave her here and come to visit whenever you want, and/or just get her over on a Visitor visa occasionally.

"If it doesn't work out with her, don't worry...plenty more available."

Ah yes, the disposable, easily replaceable, wife. Charming.

[marcgold]

My opinion: Do not, under any circumstances or for any reason go back to live in the UK. Guaranteed you'll both be unhappy there.

Be together in Thailand. The two of you can figure out a solution so you can both live together in Thailand. Many others have done this and you can too.

[Samaaw]

Take the wife to the UK - see how she likes it - then you can decide what to do... before this even the paper work isnt the issue....

[Dararasmi]

UK...all the way.

[pgrahmm]

Life is short - spend it where ..... and with who you love ..... you DON'T know how many tomorrows are in the bank.....

You know that you have who you love in LOS - you do not know how she would adapt/react to the UK especially if she is entrenched in small village LOS.....all the $$$$ in the world will do you no good if it creates an unhappy wife or a wide rift - more so it your job takes you away for long hours in what for her would be a completely foreign/unfriendly/boring/lonely/isolated environment.....

Edited October 7, 2013 by pgrahmm

[Wimbledon]

Many masters , many lives .... If you think ( has she shown interest in travel and visiting your country?? ) that she would like to test it out , let her come for a while and you two enjoy and see how it goes in London. if she does not in the end like after testing the waters , then you have been together longer ,experienced more together and then you can both decide whats best at that point .... LIFE is a Daring adventure OR NOT! ( but some commonsense is needed too)

[NanLaew]

Two things stand out. The OP's wife that has tried some small business but failed and is happy to park her arse at home in the boonies, lonely and bored. I am probably correct in assuming that it wasn't her money that set up these failed business attempts. It does not seem like she has the gumption to be self-sufficient in her home country so pretty much will be a train wreck in slow motion on a long-term UK stay. Not her fault; it's the patriarchal Thai society that breeds indolent youth and lack of personal responsibility in all genders.

The OP has a real good opportunity to build for a future IN THE UK. He is SAVING but the weather sucks and he is missing his partner. He has already tried working in the Big Mango and (like me) reckons that is a fast-track to nowhere career-wise. No future and no security. He was living HAND TO MOUTH but the weather was nice and he was with his wife. To consider chucking the former for some fanciful 'internet business' in paradise with a pretty gormless partner?

The excuse about the visa application being some sort of chore is a cop out for the OP's own insecurity about any commitment they BOTH need to make and the fears being railroaded into a clingy, heavy dependency relationship with a wife less than willing to contribute. If the wife finds it too challenging to apply for a UK visa in her homeland where everyone she deals with will speak her language (and the foreign husband, if he was there, barred from active involvement anyway), then I would guess her desire to try and forge a new life together is less ardent than the OP's.

[Noreya]

You need saving for both of you. Seem you better take a hard time getting visas for her. But it is better to make income from UK for a period of time. Because currency exchange rate will be a lot to Thai money. In my neighborhood in suburban of Bangkok. We have one couple came from UK with some saving money at their retirement age. Thai wife and British husband. They are safe from their pension and have easy retirement here. You are better be in UK at least to work for retirement fund in Thailand. Do not come to live in Thailand now. You will be broke. Not easy to make bushiness here. Too many legal and staff problem.

[technologybytes]

The decision may not be yours to make. Your wife may not like living in the UK.

I'd give it a try on the tourist visa for 6 months in the UK and reassess the situation at the end of that time.

[klubex99]

Stay where you are in the UK...

Work 18 or so months and save as much as you can.

Let your wife visit you as and when you can, but keep it real.... International travel is expensive when you are saving.

Don't keep flying to LOS... It eats up your money.

When you have 2 or 3 Mil Baht, take a month off and come to LOS.

Look around for a business to start with that capital, if you can't find anything, at least you still have your job to go back to while you use the extended time to think up a good business. I can help you there, i have run a few pretty successful businesses here, it is the true land of opportunity. Making a very good living here with a small investment is simple. I see many good opportunities here. They are everywhere.

There you go..... sorted.

[laobali]

Quite a bit of good advice offered above, in my opinion. It's unrealistic to think that a village girl could adapt and be happy in such a different environment. Without your continuous presence, what is she likely to endure living in the UK other than "... long hours in what for her would be a completely foreign/unfriendly/boring/lonely/isolated environment....." - not to mention the weather. No family, no friends, no one to share her real Thai persona with. Buying, preparing and eating the food she has always been used to and other daily routines, impossible to emulate in a Western environment.

Secure your future financially where you can do it best - in the UK. Take her to visit by all means, but pretty pointless if you have to be at work during the day. What will she do on her own? Leave her in the village until you can come back and take a Thai holiday for a couple of months at a time, and try to plan something for future years, including children, but they will be better off in many ways being brought up by her family. I don't think there's a realistic alternative for your own circumstances right now.

[robertson468]

As a relatively young man, I would strongly recommend staying and working in the UK. Invite your Wife to join you and find out the answer to the key question. Does she like it or not. My experience is that many young Thai Ladies thoroughly enjoy the opportunity to travel and consider it a good "status point" to say to their Friends that they have, for instance, lived in the UK for X months/years. If she likes it, you are home and dry. If not, then you both need to have a serious chat and set out a plan. It might be you are going to work in the UK for three years, visiting her every three months or whatever. After three years your target is to have saved £150,000 or whatever. When you get back, you intend to buy land and build some houses for rent. You will of course have to do it in her name (and I know it is not strictly kosher, but hey we are in Thailand!). You now have not only your income to live on, but also your pension fund.................end of! I know I did it myself and very happy I am too!

[Beetlejuice]

My questions to the OP is:

What sort of accommodation does he have in the UK?

Does his Thai wife have a good command of the English language, both verbal and written?

Is the OP`s employment in the UK permanent and secure?

Does he belong to any pension of insurance schemes, have assets and any savings in the UK?

These are some of the questions that will be asked by the FCO as regards to their decision to allow his wife into the UK, because they have to ensure that foreigners will not need to make claims for welfare benefits later on.

My advice to the OP is; not to get his wife pregnant at this time, and sorry to say, that I cannot see much of a future for this relationship, because I have seen all this before, where a farang falls in love with a Thai girl, wants to take her back home with him, but has no or little collateral assets and mostly lives month by month on a pay packet.

As for the question; what would you do? I would just be realistic, that`s all.

Hi, I own a nice flat in central london that I currently rent out. Yes ,my wife has a good command of English. Yes, my employment is secure. No apart from my property which has around £120,000 equity in it I do not have a pension but I believe what I have just confirmed will make us eligible for the visa. Furthermore, I don't live month by month on a paypacket..I earn enough already to live nicely and save money every month also-I am currently taking home £3000 per month after tax+commission on top equalling another £500-1500. So our life here would certainly not be short of money..My concern in staying in the UK is not money or so much getting a visa..it is moreover that I am not sure she will like it here and the visa process is also giving us both a lot of stress personally and in our relationship so I sometimes think it would be better going back before more damage is done between us..she is very upset with waiting and waiting..and also wants me to go back there more than her coming here..The worries I have going back to Thailand are about money though and saving money for the future..it is there that I have to live month by month...not in the UK..

Then it appears that all your resources and means of income are in the UK.

You have 3 options:

If your wife is not prepared to settle with you in the UK, then you could give everything up, go to Thailand to be with your wife and live on a hope and a prayer that it all works out, including risking your future prospects.

Stay in the UK and make occasional visits to Thailand, staying with your wife periodically during a year.

Give your wife an ultimatum that if she will not join you in the UK, than the relationship is off.

Whatever you decide to do next, you do at your own risk and discretion, no one can advise you, as it`s your life or as we used to say in New York; it`s your funeral buddy.

What I said previous still stands, you have to be realistic and tackle the situation for what and how it is. Otherwise what else would you prefer to hear?

[djlest]

2 years together is not long my friend... it does not guarantee you know her very well, and like many have said above, you marry and you will risk losing 50% or more of everything you are working towards, at least if you marry in the Uk you will.
Also all the loop holes they make you jump through, its not easy and well... here you are...

I went through all the same dilemmas as you many years ago, then i watched my father's pension get trashed from him and he has to work an extra 6 years until retirement, then the recession back in the UK.
I am glad i stayed in Bangkok, 100k a month if you are careful still means you can save 1000 pounds a month - i dont see many folk doing that who live in the UK these days, its not mega money no, but how much do you spend in london compared to here? how much can you actually save in London after expenses?

If you set up some compound interest on 1000 pounds a month, its not a bad pension alternative and you have more freedom, more time to spend with your GF, more time to enjoy Thailand while you are still relatively young.
Lets say you retire at 60, you will have saved about 250,000 pounds (not including pay rise and interest rates so ofcourse much more) Add some compound interest rates to that and you will have a lot more, Retire in Thailand and you should be okay.
Also, think about this... When i came to thailand it was 75 baht to the pound...
Now when i buy Pounds with my Baht, I'm laughing! The UK may fall even more and the baht stronger, the money you make in Thailand is not so weak anymore.
Who knows where the pound will end up in 20 years, all i know is Asia is rising and the West falling,.

I met my Thai GF 10 years ago - I still have NOT married her - I make it very clear that until the THAI GOV gives me the same rights as she gets in my country, i refuse to marry any Thai. Also i dont agree with marriage that much, afterall its got nothing to do with LOVE and its just a legal mess. no benefits that i can see - the only time i will ever consider marriage is when Children are involved, then it may have its vices. I dont expect 90% of people reading this to agree with me, but im happy in my choices and have watched so many divorcees lose everything, so hey...

By advise: dont follow societies burdons, you need to get married! you need a pension! you need to do this and do that etc.
Use your brain, most of the above have no benefits to us but benefit others or a system.
Save your money and learn about compound interest and investments, and avoid potential problems with Thai's

Edited October 7, 2013 by djlest

[mrwebb8825]

The obvious answer finacially is; do the math. The numbers don't matter as much as the %.

Before moving here I spent an average of 83% of my monthly income on living leaving me 17% for emergencies and savings.

Since moving here 12yrs ago I find that now I spend an average of 53% of my monthly income on living (without changing very much really) leaving me 47% for emergencies and savings.

To touch on the numbers, by the time I retire (I'm a bit older than you) I will have amassed around 5 million baht in saving (barring any major emergencies) + start collecting my SS.

That said, why not start the paperwork? She gets a 6 month, comes over to stay, decides if she likes it or not... In the mean time you eleminate 1 of those 6 month comutes which has to save you more money, and decide what to do from there.

Does she speak English? Is she shy to try? 2 key factors to be aware of. We don't mind coming here and pointing at stuff we want but Thais do. It really freaks some of them out. Taking her an English Only world can be stressful for you both. Just my 2 cents

[sawadee1947]

i'm 66 y.o now and very happy to have a very good pension because of working in EU. So there is not any option to work in Thailand with no future of any pension later. Don't fool yourself.

Your wife/GF can come whenever it's possible.

[dao16]

As far as your wife not liking the UK, that is a possibility, but it depends on a lot of factors. How is her English? Doesn't have to be great, but some would be helpful or she should be interested in learning more. Is she generally an outgoing person? Would she eventually feel comfortable making friends from all over the world? Especially in a place like London, she would have an easy time making friends with other Asians or foreigners from all over the world. My wife toughed it out for a year in another country but really started enjoying it when she found the Thai community, which also overlapped with people from other places.

That also led to jobs (which most Thais I have met abroad love, because of the higher pay), activities and excursions (as well as awesome Thai food and ingredients you would normally pay a lot more for....she started cooking a lot at home, too, since we didn't have to rely a much on similar foods but actually could get the real Thai vegetables, etc. We even hosted holidays at our house sometimes in waves. Thais in the morning or early afternoon (since they get up early and often worked weekends or nights, they seemed to like to get together at those times) and the Westerners at night.

Until she can make those connections, though, a good internet connection for Skype and streaming Thai TV (it's all out there) is invaluable so she doesn't feel completely cut off.

So, it isn't a lost cause, but it can be tough before she has a chance to set up a life for herself in London outside of you. Good luck.

[bendovid]

There is no need to apply for a visit visa first. You can go straight for the settlement if you want to, and if you already meet the current income requirements.

Also, if you do decide to go for a visit visa first, and your wife likes the idea of settlement in the UK, there is no need to wait 6 months before applying for a settlement on her return to Thailand.

As for whether or not you both will be happier in Thailand, or the UK, that's for you both to decide. Which, in fairness should mean that you postpone that decision until your wife has a chance to comment on her life in the UK, which would be best done if she could work and play a full part in your life there. And that in turn would point to a settlement visa which allows her to work from day one of her arrival.

It does take longer to process, but is more valuable once approved.

I wish you luck in whatever you both choose to do.

Hi, I have been advised by quite a few visa services based in Thailand that it is a lot easier to get the settlement visa once they have seen proof that your wife has visited your country as a tourist first.. I have also been advised that you need to wait 6 months in between visa applications..ie. no more than one per year. I agree that it would be a good idea to try the visit visa first though..then I guess at least I will be sure if she does like it here or not..

HI there. That advice, not unusually for visa service agents based in Thailand, is completely and utterly incorrect.

The evidence required for a settlement visa is;

Finances (you need to be able to show that you have an income of over £18,600 per year) there is a time element to that, which I will find out more details of for you.

Accommodation that is suitable for you both (you have a flat in London, which would meet that requirement)

The applicant (your wife) needs to have passed an English language test to a certain level (again, details of that are easy to find)

A TB 'clear' certificate.

The last two documents need to be from approved sources. But that's not too hard to do either.

Marriage certificates, and some evidence that your marriage isn't solely for the visa. You can do that too.

That's it. You either meet those requirements, or you don't. There's no "hmm she's never been there before, I think I'll refuse it on those grounds"

Any refusal has to be based on the Immigration rules, not what some people in a visa agent's office have dreamed up to get more money from you.

As for the 6 months thing, there is guidance (and it is only guidance, it's not a rule) that visitors should only spend 6 months out of 12 in the UK, but if your wife is applying for a settlement visa, then she is no longer a visitor.

I will, if you like, give you the details of where you can find this information for yourself.

I also agree that it might be a good idea for your wife to visit the UK in order to find out if she could settle here. The fact that she hasn't been here yet might have something to do with her reluctance to commit to moving here.

I always advise people to choose the visa that suits their circumstances, rather than change their circumstances to suit the visa process.

If you want your wife to settle here, or at least have some idea of what it would be like to do so, then you might consider applying for a Family Visit Visa for her.

That would give her some kind of insight into what her life would be like if she lived here full time, but she would not be able to work. If you both decided that she would like to live here, and you had everything in place for the settlement application (it's not hugely different) she could apply as soon as she went back to Thailand. It does take about 3 months to get a decision though (visit visa is about 2 weeks in my experience, my wife has had 3 Family Visit Visas)

But once you meet the requirements and have submitted all the documentation that proves that you do, you can be fairly sure of success.

As I said before, there's no real room for judgement on the part of the ECO (Entry Clearance Officer) for a settlement visa, you either meet the requirements, or you don't.

Even if you both decide to give it a go living in the UK (with your wife able to work and contribute to your lives fully) and it doesn't work out, you can then both decide to move back to Thailand. Presumably you will have had some time to save a bit of money too, seeing as you're earning quite well here. Although I do know how London can eat your money quite quickly I live there too.

Anyway, if you want to ditch the dodgy agent's advice, and find out how it really works, drop me a PM and I'll point you in the right direction (where I'll be pointing you is a completely free resource with information from people who have done exactly what you're trying to do, and I have nothing to gain from it personally).

Just thought I'd add that disclaimer!

Hi, thank you for that detailed advice. I was not aware of such a thing as a family visit visa. I will definitely PM you later to get more details around the resource to learn more..Thank you again