Dual Visa. Is It Possible?

[Burbonizer]

I was wondering if anyone can help me out here. My brother (Big Spuds) is a member here and said that you guys really help.

This is my question. ....

I have recently been to Thailand and like any normal person has met someone. The problem is that she has a 19 month old daughter. She loves it to bits and has to work in the bars to send money back to her father to look after it. The daughter's father basically done a runner when he found out she was pregnant and she has to bring it up as both mother and father. She works in a bar like most girls do who need money.

I met her on her first work doing this and i said that i would support her as she doesn't want to do it. I talk to her everynight on the phone and i beleive that we have fallen for each other. Even though we have only seen each other for 3 weeks. I know it is too soon to be thinking about all of this but something has cropped up.

Two days ago the father of the child turned up and took it whilst my girlfriend is in Pattaya. Now she is really upset as you can imagine. He has asked for 20,000 baht and he will give it back. The thing is i want to be able to get both my girlfriend and her baby to England in about 1 - 1 1/2 years time. How hard is it to get a visa for the both of them. As you can imagine she really does not want to leave the baby at all.

Any light on this matter would be appreciated. I am doing the usual keeping all e-mails, Text messages, phone calls, photos and flight stubs. So i beleive that i am on the right track so far. But does the father have to sign for the baby to leave even though he does not care about it?

Burbonizer

[samran]

The spuds family sure know how to help maintain TV's readership levels....

I leave the floor to you all.

[Gumballl]

Simple advice... move on, and say goodbye to the woman. It may seem hard to do, but you only live once, and I cannot see why you would want to complicate your life because of her situation. Plus, if you have only spent 3 weeks with your girlfriend, how well do you really know her? Chatting on the phone every day does not qualify IMO as a means of getting to know someone.

If you plan to disregard this advice, move to Thailand, live with your GF and kid for about a year, and see if things work out. There is no sense in going thru the visa steps if in the end everything falls apart (and you are broke!).

[vinny]

Before traveling, both would first need to personally apply for Thai passports at one of the passport offices. The ease or difficulty of obtaining the appropriate UK visas for them would depend on their circumstances and the prevailing immigration rules at the time of the application.

[Richard croucher]

Dear Burbonizer

I really would take the Advice that has been given to you and go and live in Thailand.After a period of time you would then come to realize,that infact,it is not most of the Girls who need Money go and work in Bar's.infact the majority of girls and Women have nothing to do with the sex industry.

To really understand any society you really do need to go and live in it,and just spending time in one of Thailands Fleshspots has certainley not shown you what a diverse country Thailand is.

I am not normally a controversal person,but the genralisation that the majority of Thai women are Bar Girls or Ex Bar Girls is quite saddening.

I met My Wife Whilst Teaching English in the Northeast of Thailand.she had been working for the same company making electronic components for well over Ten years and only earning 6600 Baht a Month of which 2000Baht was sent home to her Parents every Month.when mre and My Wife first got together,one week we had a very lean period,and only had 600Baht between us and we survided

May I suggest that you go and live with your Girlfreind in Thailand,and see what she is really Like.I would also Suggest that when you are living with her that for a period of Time take Money out of the Realationship,e.g. tell her you haven't got any and then see what Happens.

But please most of all,go and Live in Thailand,and I don't just mean Pattaya,Phuket,Bangkok,Koh Samui.I think once you have removed yourself from the Bar Scence that you will stop Making Sweeping genralizations.

Richard

I was wondering if anyone can help me out here. My brother (Big Spuds) is a member here and said that you guys really help.

This is my question. ....

I have recently been to Thailand and like any normal person has met someone. The problem is that she has a 19 month old daughter. She loves it to bits and has to work in the bars to send money back to her father to look after it. The daughter's father basically done a runner when he found out she was pregnant and she has to bring it up as both mother and father. She works in a bar like most girls do who need money.

I met her on her first work doing this and i said that i would support her as she doesn't want to do it. I talk to her everynight on the phone and i beleive that we have fallen for each other. Even though we have only seen each other for 3 weeks. I know it is too soon to be thinking about all of this but something has cropped up.

Two days ago the father of the child turned up and took it whilst my girlfriend is in Pattaya. Now she is really upset as you can imagine. He has asked for 20,000 baht and he will give it back. The thing is i want to be able to get both my girlfriend and her baby to England in about 1 - 1 1/2 years time. How hard is it to get a visa for the both of them. As you can imagine she really does not want to leave the baby at all.

Any light on this matter would be appreciated. I am doing the usual keeping all e-mails, Text messages, phone calls, photos and flight stubs. So i beleive that i am on the right track so far. But does the father have to sign for the baby to leave even though he does not care about it?

Burbonizer

[GU22]

The sudden demand from the father for 20,000baht shortly after a farang boyfriend arrives on the scene does seem a bit suspicious, as does

I met her on her first work doing this and i said that i would support her as she doesn't want to do it.I met her on her first work doing this and i said that i would support her as she doesn't want to do it.

There are a lot of men sending money to a Thai girl who assured them that they had only just started in the trade, and will stop now that they have met their one true love! This may be true in your case, but often these girls have several boyfriends who believe that they are the only one and the girl is back in the village.

I'm not saying this to put you or your girlfriend down, but to make sure that you go into this with your eyes open. You have only known her for 3 weeks.

Assuming that the relationship does develop and that you both want to marry and live together, then presumably she will want to bring the child with her. to do this you will not only need to satisfy the usual finance and accommodation requirements, you will also need to show that she has sole responsibility for the child. Assuming that the father is named on the birth certificate, there are only two ways of showing this to the satisfaction of the ECOs and the immigration rules.

1) She will need to produce the father's death certificate. (This is not a subtle hint that you take drastic action!)

2) If the father is still alive then she will need to produce a sole custody document.

If the father cooperates, this is a simple matter of them both turning up at the Ampur and signing a few forms. If the father wont cooperate then she will need to go to court. This can be a lengthy and expensive business, so a sweetener to the father so he signs the forms at the Ampur will probably be a better option.

You said

The thing is i want to be able to get both my girlfriend and her baby to England in about 1 - 1 1/2 years time.

which is the right approach. You don't really know her yet, so get to know her properly before you commit.

[Burbonizer]

wow this forum is harsh.

Right then where do i start. Firstly i know that i am jumping a head with matters but i came here for answers. Which i am sure i will get.

The reason i say that she had only just started the bars is becuase i beleive her. She cannot speak a word of English. I had to buy a book for her to speak to her. She then brought round books from school that she has. So i beleive her when she says it's the first time that she has ever done this. Telephone conversations are fun. Every night i call her and she is either in the bar serving drinks, which i told her to do (12:00pm - 3:30am) or in her room (4:00am - 10:00am).

I have read what is written above and my god you have made me think. I am now so bloody scared of her. How do i find out if she really does love me. How can i possible get her to prove that? Also i understand what you are saying GU22, It is very suspicious but how do i cope with this. I have told her that i am not going to just send money to her for it. She said she doesn't want any money and that she will do it herself. So i have stood back on this one and only offered to help should she need me. But as you say why has he all of a sudden turned up and took the child that he has never seen? He must know about me. But how?

Reference to moving to Thailand. Well for starters i don't speak fluent Thai so that would be a no go also i have a very secure job at the moment with a good income so i can't really give that up to go and live in a country that i can't work in.

You guys have put my mind in a knot.

[Burbonizer]

I am not normally a controversal person,but the genralisation that the majority of Thai women are Bar Girls or Ex Bar Girls is quite saddening.

Richard i wasn't having a go at the bar scene at all. But my brother has a Thai wife which worked in the bars. She was from Kamphaeng Phet. We went there to see her parents when we last visited. The area is so poor. My brothers wife still sends money home to her family. My girlfriend has to do the same as she is from Khorat. So when i spoke to my girlfriend and asked her why she did what she did. She said that she needs money for her baby. I said can't you do something else rather than the bars. She told me that what she did before only paid a small ammount so she came to Pattaya. This was 3 weeks before i met her.

I think if she had the choice she would rather be with her baby at home. She doesn't sleep with farang now as i told her not to. Her boss at her work has struck up a deal with her for that.

I didn't go out there for the bar scene at all. I went to see what my brother was raving on about. I just found someone myself that was all. I wish she never worked in the bars. But hey it's done now right?

[the weaver]

wow this forum is harsh.

So i have stood back on this one and only offered to help should she need me. But as you say why has he all of a sudden turned up and took the child that he has never seen? He must know about me. But how?

How do you know he has found out? how do you know he exists? How do you know the baby exists? There are many bar girls who make a living out of ripping off farangs. I am not saying that your girl is one of them I can't - I don't know her - but neither do you. If you really want to find out for sure you cannot do that in uk. You have to go back to LOS. Why not pay her a surprise visit?

Meet her family, her friends, her schoolmates and her daughter. Learn Thai and talk to people.

If thats not possible then forget her.

I know of a B/G who has 6 farang on the go. She is engaged to 3 and in the process of applying for f/vs on 2. She confidently explains that when going for visa interview she deliberately fails and then cries into the arms of her farang who continues to give her money. When her stock of victims runs low she simply works the bars again for a few weeks.

You have been warned

Edited April 30, 2006 by the weaver

[Maestro]

Two days ago the father of the child turned up and took it whilst my girlfriend is in Pattaya. Now she is really upset as you can imagine. He has asked for 20,000 baht and he will give it back.

Has anyone reading this considered the possibility that it might be a variation of the sick buffalo story? (Always assuming that we are not dealing with a troll)

I’m afraid I am not sufficiently knowledgeable in these matters to form an opinion about it.

--------------

Maestro

[GU22]

Burbonizer.

Many posters on here are expats who have all bought the T shirt as far as the bar scene is concerned. This does tend to give them a cynical viewpoint.

When your brother first posted about the "difficulties" his girlfriend had with her visa "applications" and what had really happened to the money he had been sending to pay for these applications, many people here told him to dump her.

You know what happened.

Yes, there are some bargirls with a string of boyfriends. There are girls who deliberately fail visa interviews as they don't want the gravy train to end.

But there as as many, if not more, who are genuine and do fall in love with a customer. I can't remember who, but someone once said "Can a bargirl not find love, too?"

What you have to do is learn more about your girl, so you can judge for yourself if she is genuine or not. You can't do that after just 3 weeks. I'm not suggesting that you chuck her in, neither am I suggesting that you move to Thailand. Simply continue with the phone calls (keep the phone records for any future visa application) go and see her whenever you can and meet her family.

Then you can decide where this relationship is going.

[Burbonizer]

Cheers GU22, at least you are r not as heartless.

I do beleive this girl. She has had not reason to lie to me yet. When i phone her she is where she said she would be. She said to me that when i go back to Thailand she wants me to meet her family. I have already spoke to her dad (well nit noy).

I just hope that it is not like what people say. She was really nice to me and she doesnt want my money. She said i do not need your money to love you. So hey i could not send any. Wouldn't bother her. Only that she said she would have to sleep with farang to make money. I don't want her to do that and she does want to do it. So i either forget it or plod on.

[vinny]

My Name Lon - You Like Me? is about what life as a bargirl can be like. It may give you some relevant insights. See also How Do Bargirls Get Visas?