Opinion and advice please on somewhat difficult "relationship" with Thai

[nottocus]

Get rid of her and find someone else to work for you.

You say she's reliable. Doesn't sound like it.

[robblok]

My opinion forget about the damages it was stupid of you to ho have her babysit your house. Your mistake, cant make her pay for it all.

However tell her her son needs to go your a foreigner and need privacy unlike a Thai. Change locks and see it as a learning experience. In the past i have had Thais babysit my house and dogs too. There were always some things going wrong like alcohol missing ect, not as extreme as in your case. In the end it was worth it for me inclusive the damages.

Your case is more extreme but the damages will be hard to recoup without getting problems with your staff. Bigger problem in my book is that my dog is / was part of my home security and its dangerous to have the kind of individual as you describe trusted by your dog.

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[Exsexyman]

Sorry, no offense but you are wrong.

Why let her use the full house when 1 room or even just the kitchen was enough for her and son ?

Now that it happened just think about how stupid you have been to let her full freedom at your house and let her access to your belongings.

I would I let her use only 1 room and would have locked all the other rooms + I would I put WIFI camera and tell her that everything is recorded as well as I can check online.

Not it's done so forget it and just wait that the little rat leaves (they always do when no more food !)

Good luck anyway.

You missed that she was in the house to look after 11 animals , so access could not be restricted

Eleven animals? <deleted>! Is this a hotel or a zoo?

And here we go , troll time.

Animals in my house- reading is the key, trolling is out of fashion

I'm sorry, from your other posts i thought you were a "Hotelier"! But seriously, 11 animals! Why? What's wrong with a couple of cats and a dog? That is normal. No wonder you say that when you got back the place was a sh#t hole. To misquote an old Country and Western ditty from my youth. "Show me a home, where the buffalo roam, and i'll show you a house full of sh*t!

[Naam]

Did you fill out tax returns this year and is this staff member registered with the tax and employment office as a legitimate employee of your company?

Animals are al? What does that mean?

why don't you stop your utmost silly questions?

the OP has asked for advice / opinions and last not least assistance. whether he filed a tax return or not as well as the kind of his pets are irrelevant!

[jackr]

Man, why are you even asking the question? I'll tell you why you have been rolled over, because you have been too kind, paid too much and let them take liberties. You see, when you do this, it opens the floodgates. You have been used, a mug--all your own doing--this is Thailand, not Kansas and a Thai employer would never allow what you have. To get the slob out, first you need to grow a pair, then you have to also let go of this person no matter how great you think she's been. End of!

/ That is my 'opinion/advice' ... like it or lump it, you asked. //

Edited November 17, 2013 by jackr

[krisb]

Sorry, no offense but you are wrong.

Why let her use the full house when 1 room or even just the kitchen was enough for her and son ?

Now that it happened just think about how stupid you have been to let her full freedom at your house and let her access to your belongings.

I would I let her use only 1 room and would have locked all the other rooms + I would I put WIFI camera and tell her that everything is recorded as well as I can check online.

Not it's done so forget it and just wait that the little rat leaves (they always do when no more food !)

Good luck anyway.

You missed that she was in the house to look after 11 animals , so access could not be restricted

11 animals!! He used all the shower gel washing them. There's the source of a large percent of the mess.

[PaullyW]

The OP's tale is one of the dumber things I've read in recent months. Surely the correct recommendation should involve some sort of life coaching/therapy.

OP, please fix your life up to eliminate such drams OR, if you like your life being more interesting, perhaps continue to do exactly what you've been doing. The craziness is a package deal.

[Bluetongue]

Maybe there's a good business opportunity for someone, a pet motel run to high standards aiming for pets of farang who have to return to country of origin for whatever reason, If I was closer to bigger population centres of farang I would do it myself, (legitimately of course with requisite Thai directors blah blah).

But my only advice would be to not to have done things as the Op has done, ie get 11 cats? in the first place and secondly allow workers to take advantage of him just to secure the bottom line. The outcomes he has encountered he will have to deal with, there is no other advice.

[ajs500]

He probably trashed the place so he could feel at home

Took lots of stuff..that's par for the course.

Edited November 17, 2013 by ajs500

[farang000999]

Most bizarre topic of all time?

[Mighty Mouse]

What do you pay for my time and consultancy fee?

I have the exact answer that you're looking for regarding your staff member, but in line with what you posted (above) on another thread when somebody sought advice on hotels etc., I thought it appropriate that you pay for my advice.

How much are you offering.

[CharlieH]

There is more to this story than is being revealed. You should either be hinest with us, so we can help appropriately or be honest with yourself and admit there is more going on with how you feel about this female. It seems she has something over you, or you are affraid she is going to do something and all this is stopping you doing and behaving how you know you should.

You are asking for ways to handle a situation but I dont believe you are being 100% honest about everything.

No one is interested in the type of business, what animals, taxes or anything else like that, (they might be curious etc) its not relevant to the issue, the issue is the relationship with the woman, the damages, the son, and getting back on an even keel, so to speak.

So whats really going on with her?

Other than being good staff, whats she got on you, what you scared of?

As for the son, tell him to leave, change the locks etc, get the house straight again, no one allowed in!

Once the house is free of him, cleaned up back to normal, next you address the problems with her etc people can help with that when you give a bit more on her and the real situation.

Edited November 17, 2013 by CharlieH

[davethailand]

My opinion forget about the damages it was stupid of you to ho have her babysit your house. Your mistake, cant make her pay for it all.

However tell her her son needs to go your a foreigner and need privacy unlike a Thai. Change locks and see it as a learning experience. In the past i have had Thais babysit my house and dogs too. There were always some things going wrong like alcohol missing ect, not as extreme as in your case. In the end it was worth it for me inclusive the damages.

Your case is more extreme but the damages will be hard to recoup without getting problems with your staff. Bigger problem in my book is that my dog is / was part of my home security and its dangerous to have the kind of individual as you describe trusted by your dog.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa app

Agreed 100%.

whether the op's story was daft or not at least here's a sensible reply, makes a change from the other replies from the experts.

[HeijoshinCool]

The OP had an emergency, and had to leave LOS for an extended time. The eleven animals is what came so devastating into play.

Now he's back, animals are skinny, things stolen and broken, and everything's filthy.

I can see Beetlejuice's point. If the business is not entirely above board, there's a problem getting tough with the staff.

But Scooterboy, he's a different story.

Assuming you are not going to, as CharlieH says, come clean with us, here's my advice:

Tell the woman her son is out in 5 minutes. NOW! If she does and he leaves --- in five minutes --- she keeps her job. If not, have the police come, take them out, file a report for theft and damages and take your lumps.

If Scooterboy leaves, tell the woman to clean everything, by herself, and arrange everything as it was. Buy the cleaning supplies for her. Change the locks.

Go back to work.

NOTE TO THAILAND NEWBIES: Don't ever get yourself in a situation where you must depend on the average Thai to watch over your things when you have an emergency. And, keep all your doings here in LOS, above board.

[BookMan]

Seems to me you have a number of connected but separate issues.

You asked your most trusted and integral employee to look after your house and 11 animals for 2.5 months. On top of this I presume she was still running your guest house business

If your business and your animals were your number one concern then she did those tasks for you and that should be your main concern and area of appreciation. (Looking after 11 animals for two and a half months is a big task in itself.)

Then you have the issue of damage to your house while you were away. Were you clear with your employee that she could not have family, besides her son, at the house? Were you clear with her that any damages would have to be paid for? Were you clear on what state the house was to be in on your return?

Your expectations might not meet hers and unless you told what you expected before you left...can't hold her to blame. Forget the damage and lost property and write it off as cost of her looking after the house and animals.

Then you have the issue of her being your most integral guesthouse employee. Unfortunately you have mixed personal and business streams, created an issue, and are now seeking redress. Here I would say a lesson learned. Keep the home and business separate. No reason to get rid of her from work.

Lastly you have the issue of the son. Any damage he caused or property he stole is a write off. Forget it. Clearly he has to leave your house, and you don't want to upset your no.1 employee.

Tell him u need the place bug sprayed and he needs to be out of the house. Pay for a cheap room for a week and tell him it is his. What he does after a week is up to him.

Edited November 17, 2013 by BookMan

[simple1]

Did you fill out tax returns this year and is this staff member registered with the tax and employment office as a legitimate employee of your company?

Animals are al? What does that mean?

why don't you stop your utmost silly questions?

the OP has asked for advice / opinions and last not least assistance. whether he filed a tax return or not as well as the kind of his pets are irrelevant!

I guess that Beetlejuice is inferring that if OP's staff member employment / company setup does not comply to Thai law the employee could possibly take revenge by reporting him if he takes action against her or son. This is presuming employee is knowledgeable on these matters.

It may be the OPs’ best option, as a first step, to talk with the local volunteer police who more than likely know the son. If son refuses to cooperate they will get RTP involved.

[Gsxrnz]

I'm surprised that the OP has got himself in this situation.

With his apparent wealth of knowledge on all things Thai highlighted in so many other threads, plus his ability to speak fluent Thai, one finds it difficult to understand how this situation could possibly arise.

Equally, one wonders why he is unable to satisfactorily resolve the predicament to his satisfaction.

[aussiebebe]

My advice to the OP would be to ask another Thai person in his business (a director) to help negotiate with the employee and her son. Write off the damage, pay for them to leave if needs be and change the locks when they go.

[JUDAS]

Jeez. This all boils down to respect. Your staff member, while apparently a good employee in your hotel has zero respect for you or your home which also makes me wonder what she may be up to behind your back at work. She was entrusted with taking care of your home while you were away and failed miserable or more likely just didn't care.

I have business in Thailand and have fired staff in the past, staff that were an asset to my business, once I realised they had little or no respect for me. You are IMO making this much more difficult than needs be, bit the bullet, make the decision and remove this woman's power she has over you. As tough as it may be initially work wise you'll be better in the long term.

[PattayaPhom]

Hope u havnt paid him

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[timtscott]

Sorry for your situation. It is awkward but really she is ultimately responsible for damages which occurred.

Is it really that hard to replace her as an employee? Sounds like you are more attached to her emotionally than you are admitting.

Best of luck

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[lemoncake]

I'm surprised that the OP has got himself in this situation.

With his apparent wealth of knowledge on all things Thai highlighted in so many other threads, plus his ability to speak fluent Thai, one finds it difficult to understand how this situation could possibly arise.

Equally, one wonders why he is unable to satisfactorily resolve the predicament to his satisfaction.

Since you felt like trolling , please do post a link to a thread when I claimed to speak fluent Thai and when I claimed to be an expert on all Thai things.

Will await for either the links or an apology

[lemoncake]

Sorry for your situation. It is awkward but really she is ultimately responsible for damages which occurred.

Is it really that hard to replace her as an employee? Sounds like you are more attached to her emotionally than you are admitting.

Best of luck

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

It is hard at the moment, being high season and more so good maids are really hard to find

[Gsxrnz]

I'm surprised that the OP has got himself in this situation.

With his apparent wealth of knowledge on all things Thai highlighted in so many other threads, plus his ability to speak fluent Thai, one finds it difficult to understand how this situation could possibly arise.

Equally, one wonders why he is unable to satisfactorily resolve the predicament to his satisfaction.

Since you felt like trolling , please do post a link to a thread when I claimed to speak fluent Thai and when I claimed to be an expert on all Thai things.

Will await for either the links or an apology

Here you go. http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/657944-no-russian-mafia-in-pattaya-chief-of-banglamung-district/page-6?hl=%2Brussian+%2Bmafia+%2Bfluent+%2Bthai#entry6677565

Although I do recall that you edited your post and said that you spoke fluent Russian instead, but I'd already quoted you saying you spoke fluent Thai. I never knew which piece of rhetoric (if any) to believe.

[Sealbash]

Please forgive spelling mistakes, have to use iPad as house modem and computer also broken

First buy an IPad with all the letters.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[HeijoshinCool]

Sorry for your situation. It is awkward but really she is ultimately responsible for damages which occurred.

Is it really that hard to replace her as an employee? Sounds like you are more attached to her emotionally than you are admitting.

Best of luck

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

It is hard at the moment, being high season and more so good maids are really hard to find

What's hard, Lemoncake, is that the woman that trashed your house and made it filthy, is a maid.

If you spent your time away at your mom's bedside, it's doubly devastating to come home to such a mess. Don't drag this out, man. Get it sorted and move on.

[lemoncake]

Did you fill out tax returns this year and is this staff member registered with the tax and employment office as a legitimate employee of your company?

Animals are al? What does that mean?

why don't you stop your utmost silly questions?

the OP has asked for advice / opinions and last not least assistance. whether he filed a tax return or not as well as the kind of his pets are irrelevant!

I guess that Beetlejuice is inferring that if OP's staff member employment / company setup does not comply to Thai law the employee could possibly take revenge by reporting him if he takes action against her or son. This is presuming employee is knowledgeable on these matters.

It may be the OPs best option, as a first step, to talk with the local volunteer police who more than likely know the son. If son refuses to cooperate they will get RTP involved.

Even if there was anything below the board , rest assured a maid would not know about it.

I do not need to speak with any wanna be police , and I am certainly not afraid of him .

Point was , throwing him out may create a conflict and hence why I was asking advice how to talk with her "Thai way" to keep all happy, at least for the time being

[lemoncake]

Sorry for your situation. It is awkward but really she is ultimately responsible for damages which occurred.

Is it really that hard to replace her as an employee? Sounds like you are more attached to her emotionally than you are admitting.

Best of luck

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

It is hard at the moment, being high season and more so good maids are really hard to find

What's hard, Lemoncake, is that the woman that trashed your house and made it filthy, is a maid.

If you spent your time away at your mom's bedside, it's doubly devastating to come home to such a mess. Don't drag this out, man. Get it sorted and move on.

Possibly one of the reason for not being able to think straight.

She did work in hotel and did look after the animals, so as I mentioned, she did do a good deed, it's just the state of house and her family attitude towards my stuff that is bothering me

Edited November 17, 2013 by lemoncake

[lemoncake]

Please forgive spelling mistakes, have to use iPad as house modem and computer also broken

First buy an IPad with all the letters.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Ain't that the most useful and smartest post you ever made? It sure should be

[HeijoshinCool]

Did you fill out tax returns this year and is this staff member registered with the tax and employment office as a legitimate employee of your company?

Animals are al? What does that mean?

why don't you stop your utmost silly questions?

the OP has asked for advice / opinions and last not least assistance. whether he filed a tax return or not as well as the kind of his pets are irrelevant!

I guess that Beetlejuice is inferring that if OP's staff member employment / company setup does not comply to Thai law the employee could possibly take revenge by reporting him if he takes action against her or son. This is presuming employee is knowledgeable on these matters.

It may be the OPs best option, as a first step, to talk with the local volunteer police who more than likely know the son. If son refuses to cooperate they will get RTP involved.

Even if there was anything below the board , rest assured a maid would not know about it.

I do not need to speak with any wanna be police , and I am certainly not afraid of him .

Point was , throwing him out may create a conflict and hence why I was asking advice how to talk with her "Thai way" to keep all happy, at least for the time being

Thai way?

Thai or not, anyone who refuses to leave your house, purportedly because of a fear of ghosts , is not someone even one's own mother can handle through "talking."

She gets rid of him, she keeps her job. You can let her go when low season comes around.