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Men , and thier Egoes

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New Year, so Do You have any funny memories. ?. O.K. you need to be older than 17. My first memory was the Gear Linkage falling off in my Fathers new fifties Rover ,whilst impressing the Locals. He turned a Strange Purple Color for some reason.. I followed suit years later when my Ford Popular emitted rancid eclectic fumes, on my first date with the School Cert..nice thing about getting older, we can laugh at ourself,...minus ego.thumbsup.gif

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A Gear Linkage Coming Adrift? I Doubt That Anyone Would Be Able To Top That For Hilarity.

Having Said That, I Had A Cortina 1600E Many Years Ago On Which An Indicator Bulb Failed Once, My Mates And I All Laughed Our Socks Off At That.

The gear lever of my Viva came off in my hand half way round the big doughnut outside the Arndale Centre in Poole, of course it promptly selected neutral all by itself sad.png

The same Viva had 12" wheels on the front and 13" on the back, a mate borrowed it and being helpful 'rotated' the tyres, it pulled a bit with two 12" wheels on one side :)

"I don't want to know why you can't. I want to know how you can!"

I used to carry a hammer in my Ford Zephyr MKII so when the gear linkages at the bottom end of the steering column locked up (daily), a simple task to raise the bonnet, smack them and be on your way.

Had a smart arse boss with a new Ford Escort and would do a wheelie in the gravel as he left the yard, showering our bikes. We took it upon ourselves to put it on blocks and dig holes under the rear (driving) wheels and thinly disguise it so all looked normal. Boss does his usual, jumps in the car and boots it but the wheels just spun in place and he went nowhere. We all buggered off but the night watchman told us the next day it took him two hours to unblock the car and get going. It didn't help matters that we nicked his jack as well. coffee1.gif

Back in Oz I had a week old Cortina (1972) which I had to drive to Sydney for first wife's sisters wedding. Once in Sydney twas hot and we had the windows wound down. I flicked the indicator stalk for a right turn and the plastic bit and spring broke off and flew out the window, never to be seen again! Found a Ford dealer for first service and asked if they could fix the indicator switch??? "No can do was the answer". "Why is that?" I asked. "Ford have run out of switches" came the reply!

Back in Oz I had a week old Cortina (1972) which I had to drive to Sydney for first wife's sisters wedding. Once in Sydney twas hot and we had the windows wound down. I flicked the indicator stalk for a right turn and the plastic bit and spring broke off and flew out the window, never to be seen again! Found a Ford dealer for first service and asked if they could fix the indicator switch??? "No can do was the answer". "Why is that?" I asked. "Ford have run out of switches" came the reply!

"Ford have run out of switches"! Side-splitting. Seriously, what's funny about a dealer being out of stock of an item?

My Dad took me to the local deserted airfield in his VW Beetle to teach me how to drive. I managed to jam the starter motor so it wouldn't start at all. He had to have it towed to a garage to be fixed laugh.png

Back in Oz I had a week old Cortina (1972) which I had to drive to Sydney for first wife's sisters wedding. Once in Sydney twas hot and we had the windows wound down. I flicked the indicator stalk for a right turn and the plastic bit and spring broke off and flew out the window, never to be seen again! Found a Ford dealer for first service and asked if they could fix the indicator switch??? "No can do was the answer". "Why is that?" I asked. "Ford have run out of switches" came the reply!

"Ford have run out of switches"! Side-splitting. Seriously, what's funny about a dealer being out of stock of an item?

The funny bit was how the bits flew out the window. I didn't find the dealers answer funny at all considering it was one of the largest dealerships in Sydney.

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Be carefull with young folk or they Bite You .Had a guest with new M.U ,its got Duramax badges on the side,so I said the Trailblazer hasn't got a Duramax engine. Nearly got Frog Marched to see the Duramax Badge on the rear of the Lads T.Blazer. Jeeeeeez does it matter.biggrin.png .

Driving a Morris Minor nearly 50 years ago, I remarked 'some poor sod just lost a wheel' as one went bouncing on by past us. Next time I tried a bit of steering I realised whose wheel it was...

Driving a Morris Minor nearly 50 years ago, I remarked 'some poor sod just lost a wheel' as one went bouncing on by past us. Next time I tried a bit of steering I realised whose wheel it was...

Years ago when I was supplementing my meagre income by pumping gas (OK sitting in the self-service booth). A quiet Sunday afternoon was punctuated by a spoked wheel steering onto the forecourt, past the pumps, and back onto the road, hotly pursued by the owner of the Triumph Spitfire sitting about 200m up the hill on 3 wheels. I didn't think the single-nut attachment would come adrift, I (and he) was wrong.

Still on the subject of wheels and their attachment. A neighbour had a long-wheelbase twin-wheel Transit (the type with truck style wheels), he was struggling for ages trying to undo the nuts on his front left hand wheel. He was just about to take the gas-axe to it (apply heat to loosen) when another neighbour who was a trucker casually said "left hand side, left hand thread" smile.png

"I don't want to know why you can't. I want to know how you can!"

Driving a Morris Minor nearly 50 years ago, I remarked 'some poor sod just lost a wheel' as one went bouncing on by past us. Next time I tried a bit of steering I realised whose wheel it was...

Same same. My mates and were going home at 2am on a Sunday morning in a Morris Minor. As we went round a big island the offside front wheel fell off. We left the driver to sort it out laugh.png

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Made a Chump of Myself yesterday , couldn't open the door on a new Isuzu 4x4 Hi Rider "Look at Me Truck". Apparently if you don't remove the ignition key you cant get OUT. !!........... This amused the Natives , I called one over, he removed the Key and I got out , stupid idea. No doubt there is some way to knock it out.wub.png

Made a Chump of Myself yesterday , couldn't open the door on a new Isuzu 4x4 Hi Rider "Look at Me Truck". Apparently if you don't remove the ignition key you cant get OUT. !!........... This amused the Natives , I called one over, he removed the Key and I got out , stupid idea. No doubt there is some way to knock it out.wub.png

Yes, employ a Thai to drive you around! 555

  • Author

I Supose they dont let you out of a Truck without removing the Key First ,. so no one

can drive off with the Watermellons.. Private Cars just BEEEEP, to remind You to remove it after the doors open.biggrin.png

Back in Oz I had a week old Cortina (1972) which I had to drive to Sydney for first wife's sisters wedding. Once in Sydney twas hot and we had the windows wound down. I flicked the indicator stalk for a right turn and the plastic bit and spring broke off and flew out the window, never to be seen again! Found a Ford dealer for first service and asked if they could fix the indicator switch??? "No can do was the answer". "Why is that?" I asked. "Ford have run out of switches" came the reply!

Intersting, a '72 corty would have been a TC and it had the indicators on the left of the column. did it manage to fly out the passenger window ?

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