Getting out of the bargirl / Isaan dating scene - feels great!

[Tmymaimee]

Since moving to Thailand last year, like some guys, I looked for the easy pickings. Nightclubs, bars, massage parlours….places where money comes out of your pocket. I met the whole range of girls but the common theme was money. After a number of months, I began to sicken from it. The ironic thing was that they better they acted (I don't want any money, only your heart….), the more turned off I became.

The super hot xxxxx built for nothing but sex was great for the night - in fact I never had better. But always, eventually, the hand came out for money regardless of whether she genuinely cared for me or not. Its almost like its in their genes to extract money. And that is the word. It might not be handing over money for sex…maybe more, take her out for a dinner, shopping and so on…but its always from you to her.

I then started on the beautiful but unemployed group, living in Isaan. These girls would never set foot in a bar, often never drink but overall are pretty set on hooking a farang. Their friends have married, built large homes in the local village and locals seem to think these girls are fairly lucky. Given their options in life, maybe so. But in the end, its a one way path from your wallet to them and their family.

Of course there are exceptions to the above as there always will be but by and large, I just became disillusioned by the whole one way path of money. It was never like this back home so why here? Why am I seen as a provider? What do they in fact contribute?

Now I am seeing a normal primary school teacher from Bangkok and it just feels so right. Besides sharing expenses, she doesn't laugh to make me feel good…she laughs because she wants to. The acting is finished and you get to see these girls for who they really are. There are some real beautiful girls in Thailand but it took a long time to find one.

They don't date you because you are farang or you have money; they date you because they like you. They dress up and take care of themselves because they respect themselves; they don't sell their body and can be proud when they look in the mirror.

They have a sparkle in their eye that I always noticed on the BTS and when meeting normal girls in offices and so on. Those dark, cold eyes you see so much in Nana are gone.

I'm not criticizing guys that go with the leeches as I was one myself. Its only when you step back and spend time with a normal girl that you see the difference and its unbelievable. Its almost like someone just turned on the light for me and I was living in a dark room since coming here.

For guys that are living the scene at Climax, Levels, etc…. and feel happy…I was there and was hooked. When you finally get out, its a great feeling.

Edited February 16, 2014 by metisdead
Inappropriate language removed.

[Kitsune]

Stopped when I read "The super hot xxxxx built for nothing but sex".

who speaks like this?

These are just normal girl in not so normal situations that you are contributing to.

Edited February 16, 2014 by metisdead
Inappropriate language removed.

[Tmymaimee]

I don't know…when we're in the club and she is wearing skin tight, mini shorts, 4" spike heels and has one leg raised on the table of drinks to make a 90 deg angle and grinding me…its not my vision of who I take home to visit my mother. In her spare time she worked at Soi 6. All my friends made the same comment.

[Kitsune]

I don't know…when we're in the club and she is wearing skin tight, mini shorts, 4" spike heels and has one leg raised on the table of drinks to make a 90 deg angle and grinding me…its not my vision of who I take home to visit my mother. In her spare time she worked at Soi 6. All my friends made the same comment.

Nor your mother needs to witness you having sex with newly appointed Miss Normal.

Even hookers have a life, family, kids, etc, she's just trying to make a living!

[eeeya]

Stopped when I read "The super hot xxxxx built for nothing but sex".

who speaks like this?

These are just normal girl in not so normal situations that you are contributing to.

Well I married one but sometimes I dream of renting the ferrari

Sent from my HTC One X using Tapatalk

[rgs2001uk]

I don't know…when we're in the club and she is wearing skin tight, mini shorts, 4" spike heels and has one leg raised on the table of drinks to make a 90 deg angle and grinding me…its not my vision of who I take home to visit my mother. In her spare time she worked at Soi 6. All my friends made the same comment.

Nor your mother needs to witness you having sex with newly appointed Miss Normal.

Even hookers have a life, family, kids, etc, she's just trying to make a living!

You missed out the bit about even hookers have husbands and boyfriends, not that the dumb two week millionaire needs to know that, all he has to be fed is the buffalo shyt about Thai man no good.

Check out Liberty apartments or On Nut to see how these girls live and who they live with.

The sad thing is, most of their earnings go to support the "maeng da", never mind the suckers who have never ventured futher than Soi Cowboy will keep on sending the money.

As for make a living, walked by an advert today, cleaners 15k per month, get a job in the Yam Yam factory, easily earn up to 20k per month.

Guess the lao kao bill for khun por and the gambling bill for khum mae is more.

[RandomSand]

Great post. Thanks for sharing and best wishes for your new normal

[steven100]

I couldn't read any more after ' Since moving to thailand last year ' .... it's just to dam_n long, I don't wanna read a book, just a short story ... I need to go to sleep. I need a drink.

Sent from my TR736 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Edited February 15, 2014 by steven100

[swbloke]

It's good when people make changes to their life if what they were doing was making them unhappy as seems to be the case with the OP.

It's better if they can reflect on their behaviour and move on fully, for good.

Then the shame and guilt are no longer transferred on to others, in this case with some vile and deeply misogynistic language.

[salavan]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

[brewsterbudgen]

It's good when people make changes to their life if what they were doing was making them unhappy as seems to be the case with the OP.

It's better if they can reflect on their behaviour and move on fully, for good.

Then the shame and guilt are no longer transferred on to others, in this case with some vile and deeply misogynistic language.

Good post.

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

Or maybe some of us (old & young) came to Thailand specifically to get away from the whole 'relationship' business!

[TheUsualGarbage]

Good for the OP.

A lot of farangs go through a sort of "xxxxx fascination" phase when they first get here. This and what the OP euphemistically describes as "Isaan dating" are roads to nowhere.

Normal farangs grow out of it after a month or two.

Edited February 16, 2014 by metisdead
Inappropriate language removed.

[HardenedSoul]

Of course there are exceptions to the above as there always will be but by and large, I just became disillusioned by the whole one way path of money. It was never like this back home so why here? Why am I seen as a provider? What do they in fact contribute?

Well let's see; this is what you had to say about it last year http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/680634-why-go-to-so-much-trouble-marryingdating-someone-of-a-different-culture-nationality-mentality-etc/page-2#entry7021139

Why do I date / marry Thai girls despite the cultural gaps? I am 42, look a lot older than 42, short, bald and fairly unattractive. I also have a lot of money. Thailand is perfect for me because back home, money means nothing and will not get you the same level of girlfriend you can achieve in Thailand. I would love to date the truly gorgeous, hi-so models I see around Paragon but they look for guys with way more money than me, as well as guys who are attractive (which I am not).

Everyone wants to meet someone attractive, sexy and fun. Well, in the west at 42 being short, bald and old looking, forget about it. I had a woman in a pet store ask me for coffee last year...about 90 kgs, 50 years old and disgusting.

If I'm getting you right, you were delighted that your money got you into hottie underwear you could only dream of accessing back home.

How, then, can you now turn around and slate those girls for trying to take a bite out of the carrot you deliberately dangled in front of their noses?

Sure, be happy that you've got a normal girl but don't turn around and bitch up the girls who gave you everything you craved but couldn't taste before you landed at Swampy.

[Kitsune]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

Who are you fooling? Paid dates don't count.

[Ajaan]

Of course there are exceptions to the above as there always will be but by and large, I just became disillusioned by the whole one way path of money. It was never like this back home so why here? Why am I seen as a provider? What do they in fact contribute?

Well let's see; this is what you had to say about it last year http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/680634-why-go-to-so-much-trouble-marryingdating-someone-of-a-different-culture-nationality-mentality-etc/page-2#entry7021139

Why do I date / marry Thai girls despite the cultural gaps? I am 42, look a lot older than 42, short, bald and fairly unattractive. I also have a lot of money. Thailand is perfect for me because back home, money means nothing and will not get you the same level of girlfriend you can achieve in Thailand. I would love to date the truly gorgeous, hi-so models I see around Paragon but they look for guys with way more money than me, as well as guys who are attractive (which I am not).

Everyone wants to meet someone attractive, sexy and fun. Well, in the west at 42 being short, bald and old looking, forget about it. I had a woman in a pet store ask me for coffee last year...about 90 kgs, 50 years old and disgusting.

If I'm getting you right, you were delighted that your money got you into hottie underwear you could only dream of accessing back home.

How, then, can you now turn around and slate those girls for trying to take a bite out of the carrot you deliberately dangled in front of their noses?

Sure, be happy that you've got a normal girl but don't turn around and bitch up the girls who gave you everything you craved but couldn't taste before you landed at Swampy.

You're right on the money and I wholeheartedly agree with your post, but unfortunately, this is exactly the kind of reaction the OP was looking for: he is a known troll, just writing the crap he did for the inevitable criticisms that we rational folk will have of him.

By the way, he's also a scummy, nasty racist, a fact that has become clear in many of his previous trolls--er, I mean, posts. I recommend ignoring him: his kind tend to get bored and go away when you do!

[Somsrisonphimai]

Yeh, let's celebrate and have a drink! Oh wait, the normal girl don't drink, boring, boring, boring.

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[MrHammer]

Even if the OP is a troll, I believe he is right in that dating and sleeping with girls where money is involved will eventually feel unfullfilling and empty. I know some guys who can keep the enthusiasm going for bargirls year after year and that's great for them. I'm not saint, I went through the pros and semi-pros myself to begin with, but I guess I am not hard enough to not become emotionally invested in some of them and that leads to a lot of misery, for both her and me a lot of the time.

[Banzai99]

ThaiVisa members know nothing about bars and bargirls.

[Banzai99]

I have lived here for 23 years, I came here when I was 35, that's the difference, I was a young guy, and I got along ok..

I would think most guys on ThaiVisa are old men, too old to adapt, am I right ?

Hey, guess what, that's why you can't get along, you are too old, just go back to your own home, be safe.

Thailand is not an Old peoples Home.

ThaiVisa forum might be though.

[sdanielmcev]

"Dating" hookers? Isn't that an oxymoron?

[waza]

Good post but where do you meet a average down to earth Thai girl?

[wym]

Through work, friends, family, sometimes just out and about at random.

[Somsrisonphimai]

Good post but where do you meet a average down to earth Thai girl?

At Thai Visa Forum.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[NeverSure]

Good post but where do you meet a average down to earth Thai girl?

As a good friend of mine who is a long time expat here told me: "You don't find them. They find you."

So get out and about where there are average Thai gals - malls, stores...

And don't dress like a loser.

[Robininbkk]

Good post but where do you meet a average down to earth Thai girl?

Shopping mall, markets, hospitals, red cross building at sathorn, temples, your apartment complex, public parks, universities etc etc.

It's not where you meet em, it's HOW you meet em

[Lockheed]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

My mission is to find an old Thai lady that's done the job on a few foreigner and built up a next egg so we can live in relative comfort without constant ATM withdrawl.

[Skint]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

My mission is to find an old Thai lady that's done the job on a few foreigner and built up a next egg so we can live in relative comfort without constant ATM withdrawl.

In that case a bird about 25 should have amassed the much needed riches you need to burn.

[krisb]

Of course there are exceptions to the above as there always will be but by and large, I just became disillusioned by the whole one way path of money. It was never like this back home so why here? Why am I seen as a provider? What do they in fact contribute?

Well let's see; this is what you had to say about it last year http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/680634-why-go-to-so-much-trouble-marryingdating-someone-of-a-different-culture-nationality-mentality-etc/page-2#entry7021139

Why do I date / marry Thai girls despite the cultural gaps? I am 42, look a lot older than 42, short, bald and fairly unattractive. I also have a lot of money. Thailand is perfect for me because back home, money means nothing and will not get you the same level of girlfriend you can achieve in Thailand. I would love to date the truly gorgeous, hi-so models I see around Paragon but they look for guys with way more money than me, as well as guys who are attractive (which I am not).

Everyone wants to meet someone attractive, sexy and fun. Well, in the west at 42 being short, bald and old looking, forget about it. I had a woman in a pet store ask me for coffee last year...about 90 kgs, 50 years old and disgusting.

If I'm getting you right, you were delighted that your money got you into hottie underwear you could only dream of accessing back home.

How, then, can you now turn around and slate those girls for trying to take a bite out of the carrot you deliberately dangled in front of their noses?

Sure, be happy that you've got a normal girl but don't turn around and bitch up the girls who gave you everything you craved but couldn't taste before you landed at Swampy.

[GinBoy2]

Whats a bargirl?? <coughs>

[Kitsune]

Stopped when I read "The super hot whore built for nothing but sex".

who speaks like this?

These are just normal girl in not so normal situations that you are contributing to.

Well I married one but sometimes I dream of renting the ferrari

Sent from my HTC One X using Tapatalk

Referring to women as cars?

Seriously?