So many experts on Thailand and Thai women

[eldragon]

Beetlejuice, per usual, is on point. I think what he's saying is if you want to have a relatively healthy, long-term relationship here, then you stand a better chance with a girl that's more similar to you in age, education, status, etc. Same as anywhere else in the world.

And I think it's a myth.

Based on tautologically defining "healthy" as "in line with what I think (= what I was taught to believe) is the 'right kind' of relationship." Basically comes down to "BJ and eldragon think it just isn't right".

A relationship between completely opposite types of people, 50 year age difference, little language in common, whatever, that starts out as 100% transactional can still end up being perfectly healthy for both of them.

For an old guy who just can't be happy with someone his own age, that's the only way to go anyway, not as if he has a choice about it. Maybe the odds are it won't last that long, well so be it, dust yourself off and try again, what's the problem?

Now, avoiding being scammed of your financial security, that's a completely separate topic, and as many have agreed, precautions there are just as necessary with a western-accepted same-age same-culture based-on-lurve relationship.

What part is a myth? "Healthy, long-term relationships"? Probably. But I'm talking about ones where the girl sincerely enjoys the man's company, and doesn't love him like someone loves a job (i.e., pretty good among things they 'have to' do).

[gandalf12]

People are the same no matter what country they come from. Dress, speech and food are different but after that we are all the same. It is ridiculous to make generalizations about people as it is the differences that makes us all unique.

Some people like Asian women others dont. It is a personal matter of taste. I do like Asian women but I am biased as my wife is Thai.

It is just a pity that many of the people posting here have so little to say they have to take a stance that if you meet one not so nice woman then all the women are the same. To these people I would say " get a life"

[eldragon]

People are the same no matter what country they come from. Dress, speech and food are different but after that we are all the same. It is ridiculous to make generalizations about people as it is the differences that makes us all unique.

Some people like Asian women others dont. It is a personal matter of taste. I do like Asian women but I am biased as my wife is Thai.

It is just a pity that many of the people posting here have so little to say they have to take a stance that if you meet one not so nice woman then all the women are the same. To these people I would say " get a life"

Part of that's true. But people definitely aren't the same everywhere. I wouldn't even say they're all the same within a given country.

[wym]

What part is a myth? "Healthy, long-term relationships"? Probably. But I'm talking about ones where the girl sincerely enjoys the man's company, and doesn't love him like someone loves a job (i.e., pretty good among things they 'have to' do).

If that's important to you, and you'e willing to put up with bedding an old lady to get it, you're welcome to it.

But BJ was postulating that it's necessary to make that sacrifice just to avoid being scammed, on the assumption, that so many make, that all we old mongers are kidding ourselves, rather than going in with our eyes wide open.

It's ultimately that self-deception that is the victims' downfall, so just stop kidding yourself and face the fact you're paying for play, take proper common-sense precautions, focus on getting good value for money and you can relax and enjoy the main attraction of this fine country.

He's talking about throwing out the baby with the bath water.

[JLCrab]

Screw you and your value -- I WANT MY MONEY!

Edited April 1, 2014 by JLCrab

[eldragon]

What part is a myth? "Healthy, long-term relationships"? Probably. But I'm talking about ones where the girl sincerely enjoys the man's company, and doesn't love him like someone loves a job (i.e., pretty good among things they 'have to' do).

If that's important to you, and you'e willing to put up with bedding an old lady to get it, you're welcome to it.

But BJ was postulating that it's necessary to make that sacrifice just to avoid being scammed, on the assumption, that so many make, that all we old mongers are kidding ourselves, rather than going in with our eyes wide open.

It's ultimately that self-deception that is the victims' downfall, so just stop kidding yourself and face the fact you're paying for play, take proper common-sense precautions, focus on getting good value for money and you can relax and enjoy the main attraction of this fine country.

He's talking about throwing out the baby with the bath water.

Not sure I follow all the analogies, but I hear ya. And I'm not saying a "healthy" relationship is the only kind to be had. I just think these guys that tell themselves a Thai girl will be satisfied with a "good heart" and a "provider" regardless of his age are fooling themselves. I think you and I are in agreement that it's best to be realistic about what you're getting into with a girl.

[wym]

Screw you and your value -- I WANT MY MONEY!

If they were that way inclined, they wouldn't sign up for the deal in the first place, peasants know better than anybody can't get blood from a stone.

But missed that one, looks like a great flick add it to my DL list.

Amazing she was able to play a high school senior from 13 right into her late twenties, and looks like every role had that same scheming gold-digger vibe to it too. . .

Edited April 1, 2014 by wym

[arminbkk]

What old guy would think of having a meaningful conversation with a girl many years his younger laying naked beside him, with a killer figure

that has just the right proportions that give just the right curves, touching her smooth skin along those curves and looking in her sparkling eyes and

seeing her red lips curled into a lovely smile?

No, I'm not an expert on Thailand or Thai women, but like most people I am an expert on what I like and don't like.

And while most people are generally the same, at least there are similarities, there are also differences.

And while I am not an expert, have done no research, I just know that most men, at least the majority, like the above image.

[JLCrab]

You said that your type of girl is completely uneducated so how did she know what she were signing up for?

At any rate to Eldragon it's all perfectly clear: When doing the bath water tango it takes two to throw out the baby,

[wym]

Not sure I follow all the analogies, but I hear ya. And I'm not saying a "healthy" relationship is the only kind to be had. I just think these guys that tell themselves a Thai girl will be satisfied with a "good heart" and a "provider" regardless of his age are fooling themselves. I think you and I are in agreement that it's best to be realistic about what you're getting into with a girl.

Well I think the girls are sincere when they say

a "good heart" and a "provider" regardless of his age

is all they're looking for.

Problem is it's their definition of those terms aren't realistic, many honestly think all farang have an unlimited magic money-tree to grant all their wishes.

They're generally happy to stick around as long as the poor sod feeds that illusion, once the truth comes out that they've reached the bottom of the barrel then reality sinks in on both sides.

But I reckon that's true for the vast majority of the same-age young & hansum couples married for lurve too, the romance won't survive long when the money's run out.

And then I've known a few ex-BG wives who've stuck by their no-hoper alky mate right to the end, when they had no more financial incentive, reality can surprise us sometimes.

[Berkshire]

What old guy would think of having a meaningful conversation with a girl many years his younger laying naked beside him, with a killer figure

that has just the right proportions that give just the right curves, touching her smooth skin along those curves and looking in her sparkling eyes and

seeing her red lips curled into a lovely smile?

No, I'm not an expert on Thailand or Thai women, but like most people I am an expert on what I like and don't like.

And while most people are generally the same, at least there are similarities, there are also differences.

And while I am not an expert, have done no research, I just know that most men, at least the majority, like the above image.

If you had some pictures to go with that steamy description, I might even be sufficiently aroused.

[JLCrab]

You might go with this one but it is already been determined she is not his type because he likes them simple and in cut-offs. -- so howzabout take 2?

[wym]

You said that your type of girl is completely uneducated so how did she know what she were signing up for?

You grossly overestimate the importance of formal schooling, IMO trumped by native intelligence every time. Most of my Thai graduate students are total bubbleheads compared to the average peasant here when it comes to practical matters.

There's a reason why you'll find the "farmer's clever daughter" trope in both European and eastern folk tales.

And besides, not like the deal's that complicated to start with, much simpler (and more favorable) than the ones they regularly make with the roaming brothel recruiters.

[JLCrab]

What deal? -- maybe she changed her mind. But we've been through this before -- there isn't any forum rule that says what you post has to be true and there isn't any forum rule that says I have to believe it.

Edited April 1, 2014 by JLCrab

[wym]

You might go with this one but it is already been determined she is not his type because he likes them simple and in cut-offs. -- so howzabout take 2?

Yes for sure not what I look for. But that's what makes the world go 'round and thank Buddha or we'd all be fighting over the same few girls. . .

[wym]

What deal? -- maybe she changed her mind.

Key term is either party can bow out at any time without penalty, no harm no foul.

But in practice assistance only provided back to the family, not out to play the game.

But sometimes it's just youthful impatience, if they've lined up an early sponsor, then it's their problem to explain the change in plans to the elders.

But either way, they're not tied into any minimum term or anything. . .

[eldragon]

But I reckon that's true for the vast majority of the same-age young & hansum couples married for lurve too, the romance won't survive long when the money's run out.

Maybe. But I think you get a little more leeway with a girl that's closer in age, intellect, etc.

[JLCrab]

What deal? -- maybe she changed her mind.

Key term is either party can bow out at any time without penalty, no harm no foul.

But in practice assistance only provided back to the family, not out to play the game.

But sometimes it's just youthful impatience, if they've lined up an early sponsor, then it's their problem to explain the change in plans to the elders.

But either way, they're not tied into any minimum term or anything. . .

Well if you talk in person anything of the manner and verbosity that you do on here I could see how some of those girls upcountry recruits (if they exist at all) would be screaming for the brothel recruiter to please come back.

Edited April 1, 2014 by JLCrab

[YeahSiam]

You said that your type of girl is completely uneducated so how did she know what she were signing up for?

You grossly overestimate the importance of formal schooling, IMO trumped by native intelligence every time. Most of my Thai graduate students are total bubbleheads compared to the average peasant here when it comes to practical matters.

There's a reason why you'll find the "farmer's clever daughter" trope in both European and eastern folk tales.

And besides, not like the deal's that complicated to start with, much simpler (and more favorable) than the ones they regularly make with the roaming brothel recruiters.

Clearly the moderators CHOOSE which rules to enforce and which ones to ignore because otherwise, you would be banned for creating several board names since you were BigJohhnyBKK.

I can live with that but I am offended by your references to "Thai graduate students" at your seedy "hooker academy".

Seriously, I LITERALLY cringe every single time you mention it and I'm sure there are other posters who feel the same.

Have some decency and refrain from mentioning it

[JLCrab]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=dPi40lQetew#t=20

[wym]

Well if you talk in person anything of the manner and verbosity that you do on here I could see how some of those girls upcountry recruits (if they exist at all) would be screaming for the brothel recruiter to please come back.

erm, no, can't really get more last resort than that, pretty onerous terms for all concerned, daughter runs away they lose the farm

most have an "auntie" that can show them the ropes in Patts if it comes to that anyway

and in person I don't talk much, actually more a body-kinaesthetic type teacher

Edited April 1, 2014 by wym

[JLCrab]

Well if you talk in person anything of the manner and verbosity that you do on here I could see how some of those girls upcountry recruits (if they exist at all) would be screaming for the brothel recruiter to please come back.

erm, no, can't really get more last resort than that, pretty onerous terms for all concerned, daughter runs away they lose the farm

most have an "auntie" that can show them the ropes in Patts if it comes to that anyway

and in person I don't talk much, actually more a body-kinaesthetic type teacher

Boring -- as I've said I live upcountry maybe not 5 hours drive from the nearest town and I find your description of farm girls I deal with routinely to be total fiction.

Edited April 1, 2014 by JLCrab

[wym]

I can live with that but I am offended by your references to "Thai graduate students" at your seedy "hooker academy".

Don't see how you get that, total misinterpretation.

I've been teaching English at uni here since the last millennium I was talking actual post-grad students, engineering and medicine, trying to get their 6.5's and 7's on their IELTS to go study overseas.

And you've projected your own assumptions everywhere else it seems too, no basis for your claims.

Edited April 1, 2014 by wym

[Dap]

Weeeeeeeeeeeel, Been around the block once or twice, fairly well read, and with

a bit o'life under the belt, yet have never encountered a single male who

ever admitted to honestly having an understanding of the opposite sex. Doesn't

matter if it be Thailand or Outer Bum Fark Egypt ... we don't have a clue, unless

they tell us. Anything else is pure supposition and therefore, worthless as to what

we may think

[wym]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=dPi40lQetew#t=20

We're going to need a bigger boat. . .

[rayongchelsea]

You said that your type of girl is completely uneducated so how did she know what she were signing up for?

You grossly overestimate the importance of formal schooling, IMO trumped by native intelligence every time. Most of my Thai graduate students are total bubbleheads compared to the average peasant here when it comes to practical matters.

There's a reason why you'll find the "farmer's clever daughter" trope in both European and eastern folk tales.

And besides, not like the deal's that complicated to start with, much simpler (and more favorable) than the ones they regularly make with the roaming brothel recruiters.

Clearly the moderators CHOOSE which rules to enforce and which ones to ignore because otherwise, you would be banned for creating several board names since you were BigJohhnyBKK.

I can live with that but I am offended by your references to "Thai graduate students" at your seedy "hooker academy".

Seriously, I LITERALLY cringe every single time you mention it and I'm sure there are other posters who feel the same.

Have some decency and refrain from mentioning it

I agree in many respects this whole thread is an insult.

Any foreigner with daughters by Thai spouses and is committed to their education , bringing them up politely etc..would be horrified at what is written and almost totally irrelevant to actual " normal life"

As I have said in a previous thread Thailand has deteriorated significantly since i came here, the foreigners have also.

None of this is original.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[JLCrab]

Some people just have to see the stuff they write in print or nowadays online -- what's the point of having a fiction blog if nobody looks at it?

[bigbamboo]

They all evil...all around the world.

Except my mum, she was the exception.

"Gay dear? Who dear? Me dear? No dear."

[Jessi]

Lets not forget the old saying " You don't understand this is different".....I would like a Dollar for every time I heard that.

[Showbags]

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Is this another chance to blame Thai women for the things that went wrong in your life?

yes....even the things before I met one.