What % of your acquaintances and friends turned out to be doormats and were taken advantage off by t

[captspectre]

I can only guess who considers himself to be in the 20%.

none of my friends have been taken as they have been here aver forty years and know ALL the in's and out's of thai females.

[ppmacready]

Dose lady boy count for this post?

I went out with a girl for about a year here. Friends, after meeting her and many befriending her, I asked "what do you think" to many of them that spoke Thai and lived here for 20 years or more (as I knew I was new and she was younger). All of them said stuff like"seems you are on a winner there" , and "she is a very good sort etc". Both women and men all said positive things. I went to her home town met the family, father is a crane driver, mother is the typical big jovial woman, grandmother lived in house out back. Poor, but seemed salt of the earth etc.

I have lived in many countries am 54yo, been married twice, once for 6 years (when young) and secondly for 22 years, still friends with both etc. One of my closest female friends, American married to a Japaneses guy living in Tokyo, also became a good friend of hers.

When I finally tried to break up with her, and although she had promised when first getting together that

"if you ever want to break up I cause you no trouble, it is not my fault I am younger etc". When it finally

became obvious the age difference was an issue, and after many kindnesses, she went absolutely berzerk and stole

everything she could get her hands on, and turned in to an absolute monster. Before you judge, I was not even sleeping with her, just let her live with me, as before she was sleeping on the floor in a beauty salon (I met her getting a haircut).

After a very bad experience (first time in life I understood the saying, "no good deed goes unpunished"), getting repaid with brutal cruelty after taking her out of poverty, paying for mother's gall stone operation etc. My male

friends (80%!!!) came forward and said "I did not think she was like that", but then proceeded to tell me their stories of woe, and how badly they had been ripped off. One lost a new 4x4, one a house etc. I heard from a few that some men that loved the girl, killed themselves etc. Many said it is the "price of living here, and until it happens you won't believe it" etc. I had read all the books like "Private Dancer" and she spoke reasonable English and had been married before to Thai guy that died (so a widow, which I checked out and was true) and had owned a jewellery business. Obviously not a bar girl etc.

No matter how cautious I was, and no matter how much due diligence I applied, she still ripped me off blind and fooled all and sundry.

Please don't respond and say it is not just Thailand, you can't find such endemic behavior elsewhere, except *maybe* the Phillipines. Here is a response to one guy offering possible answers and my response..

(his take)

I have a theory for their overall behaviour patterns.

Basically, the vast majority of single mothers will be from low educated, low income, poor backgrounds where Mum and Dad (if still together as a family unit) can do nothing but try and make money whatever way they can.

It's not uncommon for the families to be breeding 5,6, 7 + kids. Where is the love and affection for these kids coming from? They simply get swallowed up into the complications of the family. The talk is about nothing but survival and money. When you listen to Thai's talk it is amazing how many of them have to indulge in a conversation about the cost of things and money.

You have a disagreement with them and they come straight at you with the financial statement. It's almost like a total obsession with them. When they see us they sense an opportunity. This is why the bar girls are the way they are. Totally ruthless, practically fanatical about getting money any way they can.

Their nurturing has placed them in a vulnerable, unloved position in life. They fill this void and deep insecurities by hooking onto our benevolence. They have no rationality because their own survival takes precedence over ANYTHING else!

This causes them to pursue ill-gotten gains, steal, cheat and hurt people without any remorse whatsoever. They have survived and that's all that matters!

(my response)

I think the above may be somewhat valid, but "M" only has one brother and parents are together, her father is a crane driver. I have been in many other poor countries, and I have found that if you are kind to someone, they generally feel very bad if they screw you over. "M" somehow seems to have twisted her mind to

believe she deserves half my assets, just coz I was very kind to her for a year??

When I met her, she was sleeping on the floor of a beauty shop with other girls and penniless.

She now has money and a business etc. Is there is even a word for gratitude in Thai?

I look at countries like India, with worse poverty, but the people still seem to have some morals.

I’m getting back about 10% of what she stole, the cop that promised about 25% was to meet on

Friday, but holiday, then today (Monday) we find he’s not back until Friday, he was probably bribed by her

to say that, so they could rape me for more…of course she flirted with all the cops and I had

watch them believe her bullshit.

====

And then this...

(pal)

Apparently all Thai's are the same, irrespective of where you meet them or education etc, apparently they do it to each other all the time.

I asked my pal, “How can she be so cruel after I paid for her moms multiple operations,

her own five times in hospital, getting her a laptop and a scooter and the trip to Aus etc etc etc etc?”

He says "right of passage if you try and live here. You won’t believe they can have no remorse or conscience

or basic honesty until you experience it”

(me)

I literally have known using heroin addicts that have far more ethics.

But you would/could never believe this unless you experience it.

It is soo far out of our Western values/beliefs. However Japanese are as honest as most, if not more honest than most.

So it is not an Asian thing, it must just be a Thai thing (which I am hearing repeatedly).

On this

http://newsletter.thaivisa.com/sendy/w/F9n6ijPfw5zlC4rdEWrOeg/GqO7cTr5rscAtvOrMfwaig/bQ6QHXd0892KMVdACXaZ969g

You often read where some Western guy kills himself over being “seduced/robbed/swindled/humiliated” by some Thai girl.

I used to think ….

“what a wimp” or “must be really gullible” and “he is old enough to be her father, can’t he see

she is just in it for the money?” etc etc.

Other negative stories you hear, you think the guy must have been really gullible/stupid/greedy/sex addict or

whatever.

Now I think….

"Poor bastard, would never have even seen it coming, probably way too trusting a guy to live in Thailand.”

And can relate completely, many lose their life savings.

Happens a lot….guys fall in love, she takes him for everything, he kills himself.

The ironic thing is, I bet they all think “that will show her”, “she will be sorry now” etc.

But the truth is she will not give a shit and simply wonder how she can gain from his death.

Thank God I never loved her, more of a sort of charity thing for me, we made it SUPER clear

and agreed that it was very likely a short relationship. (age etc, and she promised she was fine with that etc)

It still amazes me, the lack of conscience or even belief in Karma here (supposed to be Buddhist).

It really is corrupt on soooo many levels.

I am way too much of a trusting guy to be here (perfect 20/20 hindsight! tho ; )

I have lived by….

It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.

--Samuel Johnson

Works in most places, but not sure it applies here. Guy should have said ….

In England, It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.

--Samuel Johnson

Anyway, I will survive, many don’t, especially if they were truly trying to help someone, and then get robbed.

It is far worse to get raped by someone you are trying to help, rather than by a stranger.

So hard to believe, few believe it (like me) and so the system/scam/con-game goes on.

Not sure I want to live here, knowing everyone is out to scam me, and is insanely good at it.

Your pals warn you, but you can’t see it until you are hurt….. BAD.

=====

I hope this helps someone, I now play their game, act as the "super rich farang" that I am in their eyes, and that I will always be, and now watch the pretty little girls tell me lies, trying to be #2 to rob me, I even get "freebies" in their attempt to get at the "huge money by getting rich by marrying a farang", and when she says "I like fat guys" , I say "I like small breasts" or if she says "young man no good, older man better", I lie back in equal fashion.

Once bitten twice shy, and having a ball now that I know how the game is played.

Good luck to us all!

NS

PS Been visiting here (owned apartment) for 10 years, lived here for two, not interested in hearing how it is not just a Thai thing, or "what about the men that rip off Thai women?" If you believe that, you have no idea and have not researched properly.

Great reply.

Thank you.

I've been here to long!

I met a young pretty girl who only had one eye.

We have a lot of chemistry in the sack.

But that's another story.

I thought it was a bad squint.

A week after she moved in I found out.

6 months later , I wasn't in love ( I don't do that!) but I justified to myself why shouldn't I buy her an eye?

I help perfect strangers in need all the time.

It appeared to me, it would give her and her son a mental lift, I thought they were due.

We broke up, one of several, until she learnt. I say what I mean, and mean what I say!

I told her I'd still buy her the eye and I did.

3 years later, the chemistry is still there.

Ive been ''of the run' for a year and she has been an exemplary nurse.

She is the Nemesis of everything I have learnt and believe about Thai girls.

When she proudly shows of her fat, ugly old Falang boyfriend on Facebook, the young Falang guys hurl abuse in disbelief.

I call them beauty and the beast photos.

So although I warn everyone about Thai ladys.

Whilst they have 'passionate' feelings for you at least.

They can become almost human.Almost!

[CharlieH]

So you found someone who can keep an eye OUT for you huh. you doormat !

Edited June 6, 2014 by CharlieH

[pgrahmm]

I would have to say 0%.......my friends are married to - from what I can see/watch/hear about - including myself some outstanding women who do not take advantage of their men but only wish for the normal things in life.......I have seen some men/farang (not friends) that treat their women in ways that make me ashamed to be a farang at times.....

I also have to say we don't swim with the bar, service/massage/sex trade, or constant partying crowds. It always amazes me how they seem befuddled by the fact they don't meet quality people by by hanging with those crowds and the fact that they get gobbled up by a bigger shark than themselves.....even if she is 5 feet tall with the face and body of an angel.......

[joshstiles]

120%....all of my friends and many acquaintances

[ppmacready]

So you found someone who can keep an eye OUT for you huh. you doormat !

Theres so much there for you to work with CharlieH, I'm feeding you your lines,I thought you could of done much better!

​I'm sure another wit can surpass your humour this time.

That sweed is pretty good though..

Now he amused me earlier!

She is the Nemesis of everything I have learnt and believe about Thai girls.

I thought was the intelligent attempt at humour, to take route

[joshstiles]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

OP - tell me what the hell a "T" is and I'll tell you that your thread is still stupid.....

Rimmmer Rimmer Rimmer Rimmer Alert Alert Alert......look he said "stupid"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where the hell are you.....send out the warning NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on Rimmer....you double standard b_____d

[Paulzed]

Everyone I know, including myself.

Having said that, my new Thai wife is a lovely gentle sole who couldn't harm a fly who wants to have a happy normal life.

Edited June 6, 2014 by Paulzed

[JLCrab]

When I said much earlier 'What about the men who take advantage of Thai women' I was not referring to men who abuse Thai women or treat them harshly. What I was referring to was that Farang come here and hook up with Thai women in their 20's and 30's -- the prime of their lives -- and IMHO leave them poorly compensated for that. Some help them to sustain their independent existence, but many leaving them unprepared and only want to rant about how little he gives her.

[ppmacready]

When I said much earlier 'What about the men who take advantage of Thai women' I was not referring to men who abuse Thai women or treat them harshly. What I was referring to was that Farang come here and hook up with Thai women in their 20's and 30's -- the prime of their lives -- and IMHO leave them poorly compensated for that. Some help them to sustain their independent existence, but many leaving them unprepared and only want to rant about how little he gives her.

There is a queue of Falang a mile long happy to date decent Thai women.

I'm quite sure back in the pool of life they will survive.

As do most of the doormats.

[Guitar God]

I have three make farang friends who are still happily married to their Thai wives, one for 15 years, one for 13 and the other at least 10 ( they have a 9 yo boy and another in the way.

I have one acquaintance who was married, divorced and she wanted to keep the house, an old truck and other property. He went to court, proved he paid for everything, she ended up keeping the truck and had to sell the house and he kept the proceeds from that.

So my experience is somewhere between 0 and 25%, depending how loose your definition of "friend" is.

[JLCrab]

When I said much earlier 'What about the men who take advantage of Thai women' I was not referring to men who abuse Thai women or treat them harshly. What I was referring to was that Farang come here and hook up with Thai women in their 20's and 30's -- the prime of their lives -- and IMHO leave them poorly compensated for that. Some help them to sustain their independent existence, but many leaving them unprepared and only want to rant about how little he gives her.

There is a queue of Falang a mile long happy to date decent Thai women.

I'm quite sure back in the pool of life they will survive.

As do most of the doormats.

Great -- thanks to you and Google AdSense I am now seeing ads for Vinyl flooring and doors mats. So how come the queue is a mile long --Can't they find decent Thai women?

I remember reading about some guy who is married to a nurse and she never asks him for anything. Maybe one of those decent Thai women is a girl who always wanted to be a nurse but never had the money to go to nursing school. What do you tell her -- come back when you finish nursing school?

Edited June 6, 2014 by JLCrab

[ppmacready]

When I said much earlier 'What about the men who take advantage of Thai women' I was not referring to men who abuse Thai women or treat them harshly. What I was referring to was that Farang come here and hook up with Thai women in their 20's and 30's -- the prime of their lives -- and IMHO leave them poorly compensated for that. Some help them to sustain their independent existence, but many leaving them unprepared and only want to rant about how little he gives her.

There is a queue of Falang a mile long happy to date decent Thai women.

I'm quite sure back in the pool of life they will survive.

As do most of the doormats.

Great -- thanks to you and Google AdSense I am now seeing ads for Vinyl flooring and doors mats. So how come the queue is a mile long --Can't they find decent Thai women?

I remember reading about some guy who is married to a nurse and she never asks him for anything. Maybe one of those decent Thai women is a girl who always wanted to be a nurse but never had the money to go to nursing school. What do you tell her -- come back when you finish nursing school?

Dunno.

When I want a nurse I go directly to Cebu.

But these days I feel like a Physiotherapist.

[parmo2]

Western men give 100 times more respect to Thai women than they deserve, they should worship you and give you sex ever hour if you want, they are third world women from a feudal country who have found a shortcut in life - you.

they are ALL very greedy, only want your wealth for them and their greedy families, they should be very grateful indeed to meet a man from a first world country, no matter how old he is.

You can easily see who are the doormats here, they probably get permission from their squeaky voiced LBFM to write the post.

Edited June 6, 2014 by parmo2

[Stradavarius37]

OP - tell me what the hell a "T" is and I'll tell you that your thread is still stupid.....

Rimmmer Rimmer Rimmer Rimmer Alert Alert Alert......look he said "stupid"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where the hell are you.....send out the warning NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on Rimmer....you double standard b_____d

Someone's gone off their meds lol

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

[Equalizer]

What percentage of the 80% nailed a few vulnerable under privileged brainwashed village girls for the price of a chicken Tikka massala before they bumped into the hot cookie cookie with a nice looky looky and who tooky tooky all these rookie rookies???

[Equalizer]

What percentage of the 80% nailed a few vulnerable under privileged brainwashed village girls for the price of a chicken Tikka massala before they bumped into the hot cookie cookie with a nice looky looky and who tooky tooky all these rookie rookies???

[ppmacready]

Western men give 100 times more respect to Thai women than they deserve, they should worship you and give you sex ever hour if you want, they are third world women from a feudal country who have found a short in life - you.

they are ALL very greedy, only want your wealth for them and their greedy families, they should be very grateful indeed to meet a man from a first world country, no matter how old he is

Even I can hear the hounds baying to reply to this one!

What you probably meant to say is-

Generally, I personally have learned not to trust Thai women. It is sad how often their mothers use them to fetch money for them. They might not be working as bone fide prostitutes, but in many ways their families prostitute them by encouraging them to marry or date a farang with money. The Thai people in general are egocentric and do not easily fall in love in the true sense as much as they look for material security, and this has been verified by social psychologists who have researched Thai culture. Read Suntaree Komin, Ph.D. on the internet. She is a Senior Fulbright Scholar and a member of the Thai Royal Educational Patronage Society. She is Internationally respected and the leading expert on the psychology of the Thai people. Dr. Komin is Thai.

[ppmacready]

What percentage of the 80% nailed a few vulnerable under privileged brainwashed village girls for the price of a chicken Tikka massala before they bumped into the hot cookie cookie with a nice looky looky and who tooky tooky all these rookie rookies???

Thats a good point.

Maybe I should adopt that line rather than.

My unsympathetic one word I use, C##T!

[The Usual Suspect]

.001%

[Equalizer]

Western men give 100 times more respect to Thai women than they deserve, they should worship you and give you sex ever hour if you want, they are third world women from a feudal country who have found a short in life - you.

they are ALL very greedy, only want your wealth for them and their greedy families, they should be very grateful indeed to meet a man from a first world country, no matter how old he is

Even I can hear the hounds baying to reply to this one!

What you probably meant to say is-

Generally, I personally have learned not to trust Thai women. It is sad how often their mothers use them to fetch money for them. They might not be working as bone fide prostitutes, but in many ways their families prostitute them by encouraging them to marry or date a farang with money. The Thai people in general are egocentric and do not easily fall in love in the true sense as much as they look for material security, and this has been verified by social psychologists who have researched Thai culture. Read Suntaree Komin, Ph.D. on the internet. She is a Senior Fulbright Scholar and a member of the Thai Royal Educational Patronage Society. She is Internationally respected and the leading expert on the psychology of the Thai people. Dr. Komin is Thai.

So you name me one developing nation whose people do not fit this criteria?

[Equalizer]

What percentage of the 80% nailed a few vulnerable under privileged brainwashed village girls for the price of a chicken Tikka massala before they bumped into the hot cookie cookie with a nice looky looky and who tooky tooky all these rookie rookies???

Thats a good point.

Maybe I should adopt that line rather than.

My unsympathetic one word I use, C##T!

Remember the saying there is no such thing as CANT. Chin up old chap chin up.

[ppmacready]

Western men give 100 times more respect to Thai women than they deserve, they should worship you and give you sex ever hour if you want, they are third world women from a feudal country who have found a short in life - you.

they are ALL very greedy, only want your wealth for them and their greedy families, they should be very grateful indeed to meet a man from a first world country, no matter how old he is

Even I can hear the hounds baying to reply to this one!

What you probably meant to say is-

Generally, I personally have learned not to trust Thai women. It is sad how often their mothers use them to fetch money for them. They might not be working as bone fide prostitutes, but in many ways their families prostitute them by encouraging them to marry or date a farang with money. The Thai people in general are egocentric and do not easily fall in love in the true sense as much as they look for material security, and this has been verified by social psychologists who have researched Thai culture. Read Suntaree Komin, Ph.D. on the internet. She is a Senior Fulbright Scholar and a member of the Thai Royal Educational Patronage Society. She is Internationally respected and the leading expert on the psychology of the Thai people. Dr. Komin is Thai.

So you name me one developing nation whose people do not fit this criteria?

Bhutan.

[frankybaby]

The older the second hand husband is, the sooner they inherit, that is why women are smarter than men

[Doc46]

I see the flip side of this quite frequently.

Young girl, catches what she thinks is a wealthy, older western man, because she only knows him while he is on vacation with a pocket full of spending money.

Fast forward a year, they are married, he may have built a house, probably not the palace he promised her.

He's 70+ with a minimal income, just enough to scrape up the visa requirements.

She's 30, and now spends her life working as a nursemaid, one that is also required to cater for her patient's sexual needs.

They don't go anywhere, he just wants to sit outside his house in a village somewhere, waiting to die. No more vacations, no more party times, just a scrape by on his minimum income existence.

Then he professes to be amazed and shocked several years later when she decides she's had enough of working as his slave, never having any fun, only taking care of an old man who wasn't the rich prince he professed to be when they met, and decides that the house is a suitable level of remuneration for her services to date, and kicks him to the curb.

Sound familiar?

Uck me sure does.

[mrfaroukh]

Around 40%

[Equalizer]

Western men give 100 times more respect to Thai women than they deserve, they should worship you and give you sex ever hour if you want, they are third world women from a feudal country who have found a short in life - you.

they are ALL very greedy, only want your wealth for them and their greedy families, they should be very grateful indeed to meet a man from a first world country, no matter how old he is

Even I can hear the hounds baying to reply to this one!

What you probably meant to say is-

Generally, I personally have learned not to trust Thai women. It is sad how often their mothers use them to fetch money for them. They might not be working as bone fide prostitutes, but in many ways their families prostitute them by encouraging them to marry or date a farang with money. The Thai people in general are egocentric and do not easily fall in love in the true sense as much as they look for material security, and this has been verified by social psychologists who have researched Thai culture. Read Suntaree Komin, Ph.D. on the internet. She is a Senior Fulbright Scholar and a member of the Thai Royal Educational Patronage Society. She is Internationally respected and the leading expert on the psychology of the Thai people. Dr. Komin is Thai.

So you name me one developing nation whose people do not fit this criteria?

Bhutan.

I beg your pardon wife is Bhutaneeze. Cost me four camels and Porsche.

[puukao]

100%, but I had only one friend.

oh wait, we are no longer friends.

so 0%.

[slipperylobster]

same percent as the alcohol you drink...

[poweratradio]

Only happens if it is allowed. I'd say its low perhaps 10% at best.