Thai men and their offspring - why do so many not care after a divorce?

[Tmymaimee]

One thing I've really noticed that's different between Western and Thai men is when it comes to children. In the west, you see men literally give up everything in their life just for weekly visitations. Children are almost used like a pawn by the ex-wife and the father is driven to fight at all costs for custody or joint custody.

I had a work colleague that actually killed himself after being denied joint custody because he lived 1000 miles away from the mother. Men will pay millions in child support payments following custody judgements. It really seems to me that western guys want to be part of their children's' lives regardless of the change in marital or relationship status with the mother.

Contrast this with what I see so many times in Thailand where the father doesn't even care to visit his children or pay any type of financial support. Its almost like they have a psychological issue with being a father and don't want to be a part of their children's lives after the relationship ends. You see this predominantly in Isaan where the father seems to leave even during the pregnancy. You ask the mother why she doesn't fight for support and more often than not, she doesn't even seem to care whether the dad is in the picture or not.

Is this a cultural thing or something else? I've simply never seen such a lack of care in any other culture. Of course not all Thai men are like this, but certainly the lower class Isaan men seem to be.

Its great that so many farang are okay with raising this spawn as their own but I would think the kid will always feel socially awkward. How many times you see this? The shorter, plump dark lady with two dark skinned kids and a white dad. You just know he is not the father.

[snottgoblin]

Was this piece of empirical research carried out on Thaifriendly?

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Thai men are just less susceptible to blackmail.

My former western wife tried it on with me, being a sensible Thai man, I just moved country.

They/we just place "not being a pussy whipped doormat" above "being a dad".

Edited June 14, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[Soutpeel]

Was this piece of empirical research carried out on Thaifriendly?

Carried out in coyote bar on Nana me thinks.

[snottgoblin]

Whereustay, when you carried out this research, did you weigh all of the participants?

Edited June 14, 2014 by snottgoblin

[JimmyTheMook]

Thai men are just less susceptible to blackmail.

My former western wife tried it on with me, being a sensible Thai man, I just moved country.

They/we just place "not being a pussy whipped doormat" above "being a dad".

Sounds like a loser attitude, real men take care of their kids.

[David48]

Just some issues to arise form the OP ...

"Men will pay millions in child support payments following custody judgements." ... since you are using a Western example, lets presume that you are referring to either Dollars or Pounds.

Millions ... don't you think that the statement is a bit of a stretch? Stats to back up that claim?

"I've simply never seen such a lack of care in any other culture." ... you've personally visited every other Culture?

Coffee time ...

.

[Tmymaimee]

Please remove.

Why? Is it not a legitimate observation? How many high profile custody court cases have you read about in Thailand where the father is fighting for custody for visitation rights? I haven't. Why?

[David48]

Whereustay, when you carried out this research, did you weigh all of the participants?

I don't think so ... his hands were otherwise occupied ...

.

[Tmymaimee]

Just some issues to arise form the OP ...

"Men will pay millions in child support payments following custody judgements." ... since you are using a Western example, lets presume that you are referring to either Dollars or Pounds.

Millions ... don't you think that the statement is a bit of a stretch? Stats to back up that claim?

"I've simply never seen such a lack of care in any other culture." ... you've personally visited every other Culture?

Coffee time ...

.

I'm of course referring to the high profile celebrity suits where the father is willing to spend millions of dollars for access to his children. Have you heard of the same occurring in Thailand? Why don't the Thai father's care?

[snottgoblin]

I think this thread will join the long list of whereustay locked topics.

[Tmymaimee]

Was this piece of empirical research carried out on Thaifriendly?

Carried out in coyote bar on Nana me thinks.

Sorry, she moved to Lighthouse, Soi Cowboy. Quality bar.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Thai men are just less susceptible to blackmail.

My former western wife tried it on with me, being a sensible Thai man, I just moved country.

They/we just place "not being a pussy whipped doormat" above "being a dad".

Sounds like a loser attitude, real men take care of their kids.

The women don't care, the courts don't care, it appears the men aren't needed, just their wallets.

And if the man's wallet goes, it's replaced by a government wallet.

So explain why "real men take care of their kids" when nobody appears to want them to do that.

Seems to me the losers are the guys that hang around to endure the shit heaped on them.

[David48]

Please remove.

Why? Is it not a legitimate observation? How many high profile custody court cases have you read about in Thailand where the father is fighting for custody for visitation rights? I haven't. Why?

Why? ... because you don't read Thai.

Oh go on ... tell us you are, apart form a Social Demography expert ... you are also fluent in the written Thai Language.

.

[Tmymaimee]

I think this thread will join the long list of whereustay locked topics.

Why would that be the case? No profanity, threats or discussions of prostitution, and certainly Thai related. Or do you fail to comprehend this topic? Its a valid point when you see so many single mothers living in poverty with the dad nowhere to be seen. Why?

Perhaps making a small effort to offer and opinion rather than your stupid bar drivel would be of more interest to Thai Visa readers? Or are you a carer of dark skinned spawn? That explains a lot. Now I know why you want it locked. It hurts to close to your heart. Now I see.

[Soutpeel]

Was this piece of empirical research carried out on Thaifriendly?

Carried out in coyote bar on Nana me thinks.

Sorry, she moved to Lighthouse, Soi Cowboy. Quality bar.

Did you ever check "her" ID to confirm "she" is in fact a "she" and not a young chap in a dress ?

[HeavyDrinker]

I think this thread will join the long list of whereustay locked topics.

I think this thread will join the long list of Whereustay's invented nonsense topics...

At least he's not rattling on about one of his invented whores....

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Oh go on ... tell us you are, apart form a Social Demography expert ... you are also fluent in the written Thai Language.

.

Don't you remember, he claimed that on his last disappeared thread. But refused to type Thai with anyone in the Thai language forum.

[snottgoblin]

I think this thread will join the long list of whereustay locked topics.

I think this thread will join the long list of Whereustay's invented nonsense topics...

At least he's not rattling on about one of his invented whores....

Only a matter of time Edited June 14, 2014 by snottgoblin

[Tmymaimee]

Thai men are just less susceptible to blackmail.

My former western wife tried it on with me, being a sensible Thai man, I just moved country.

They/we just place "not being a pussy whipped doormat" above "being a dad".

Sounds like a loser attitude, real men take care of their kids.

The women don't care, the courts don't care, it appears the men aren't needed, just their wallets.

And if the man's wallet goes, it's replaced by a government wallet.

So explain why "real men take care of their kids" when nobody appears to want them to do that.

Seems to me the losers are the guys that hang around to endure the shit heaped on them.

Because the kids need a dad so they can grow up to be functioning, working members of society. Generally a father's job is to do that. Should it be any different in Thailand?

Of course I don't want to generalize as I see many decent Thai men taking care of their kids. Of course, they also tend to be more affluent and upper society as those are the circles I roll in. Except when I ghetto down sometimes and partake in Isaan cuisine. But I would never marry one, unlike so many of the readers here.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Thai men are just less susceptible to blackmail.

My former western wife tried it on with me, being a sensible Thai man, I just moved country.

They/we just place "not being a pussy whipped doormat" above "being a dad".

Sounds like a loser attitude, real men take care of their kids.

The women don't care, the courts don't care, it appears the men aren't needed, just their wallets.

And if the man's wallet goes, it's replaced by a government wallet.

So explain why "real men take care of their kids" when nobody appears to want them to do that.

Seems to me the losers are the guys that hang around to endure the shit heaped on them.

Because the kids need a dad so they can grow up to be functioning, working members of society. Generally a father's job is to do that. Should it be any different in Thailand?

Of course I don't want to generalize as I see many decent Thai men taking care of their kids. Of course, they also tend to be more affluent and upper society as those are the circles I roll in. Except when I ghetto down sometimes and partake in Isaan cuisine. But I would never marry one, unlike so many of the readers here.

Who says kids need a dad?

Not the courts

Not the welfare

Not the mothers

I know a whole host of single mothers and their children in the USA and Thailand, most of them seem to do OK without a dad.

[Tmymaimee]

Was this piece of empirical research carried out on Thaifriendly?

Carried out in coyote bar on Nana me thinks.

Sorry, she moved to Lighthouse, Soi Cowboy. Quality bar.

Did you ever check "her" ID to confirm "she" is in fact a "she" and not a young chap in a dress ?

Oh Southpeel, you never rest, do you? Did you have an absent father growing up, much like HeavyDrinker? Explains a lot of the anger regarding this legitimate post. Sorry, but accepting the truth is the first step to losing your anger. Your father deserted you and I'm sorry but leave your personal anger issues out if it so we can have a meaningful discussion please.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

A quote from the movie "Fight Club" about children, women and marriage,

"We are a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another woman is the answer we really need."

Edited June 14, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[transam]

There is no law follow up here to "collar" blokes who have pissed off and pay nothing for their kids upkeep. Thats why many ladies look for a "soft" farang to do the providing to bring up others kids...................

[David48]

I feel for the OP ... his fingers must be bleeding trying to keep up with the replies ... and ****** rubbing his hands.

Edited June 14, 2014 by David48

[David48]

What ... no Fathers!

Please say it isn't so ...

.

[snottgoblin]

David, I think his fingers and palms are bleeding, but not through typing replies.

[snottgoblin]

But I would never marry one, unlike so many of the readers here.

No, you meet to actually meet a real live woman to get married and that is something you have yet to do, dreamer

But whereustay is rolling with the hi-so people HD, even from his studio room in On Nut.

[David48]

David, I think his fingers and palms are bleeding, but not through typing replies.

...

[Issangeorge]

I have been coming to Thailand for 27 years, living here for eleven, and one of the things I find different is the Thai's responsibility to their children, both men and women. I have seen many men (actually usually they are boys) who have abandoned their kids at a young age, in most cases they are too young to take the responsibility, I have also seen women abandon their children, which you almost never see in the west.

I think one reason is it usually happens when the man or woman are young and have no prospects in life. Another reason is, as all other laws in Thailand, the child support laws are not enforced so the men can get away with it. How many men in the west would abandon their children if they could get away with it?

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