Your First Time In Thailand

[bkkmadness]

it should be said that the vast majority of the points raised by the OP apply only when dealing with certain parts of Thai society.

It seems to me your statements above and below totally contradict yourself.

i do, naturally, agree with your generalisations at the end of your post

suppose what I want to say is:

Any girl from any level of society could rip their boyfriend off.

Any girl from any level of society could be gifted a house/mobile/gold.

Any girl from any level of society could also be a loyal and loving partner.

Edited July 16, 2006 by bkkmadness

[leftcross]

just because there are exceptions to every rule, it does not mean the rule is wrong.

however, i don't believe what you pointed out is an error on my part.

your GENERALISATIONS could just as easily be used to counter your basic arguments ... ie: some insect eating, gold wearing, nokia 666 dialling farm girl might not be a salt of the earth, cor blimey guvnor cast iron good 'un.

the scenarios the OP described are more common among poor, working class thais - although not limited exceptionally to this strata.

phones, gold, insects, buffalos are hardly the subjects of conversation among the white skin lotion brigade are they??

[bkkmadness]

just because there are exceptions to every rule, it does not mean the rule is wrong.

When there's a lot of exceptions you have to start questioning the rule.

your GENERALISATIONS could just as easily be used to counter your basic arguments ... ie: some insect eating, gold wearing, nokia 666 dialling farm girl might not be a salt of the earth, cor blimey guvnor cast iron good 'un.

My basic argument is that all levels of society will take gifts of houses, gold , phones and eat insects. I can't see how you can disgree with that? In fact you didn't, you naturally agreed with it, but then you did, but then you didn't and I'm not sure if you are following this at all.

the scenarios the OP described are more common among poor, working class thais - although not limited exceptionally to this strata.

Thats what I've been saying, not limited exceptionally as oppose to you earlier saying 'only'. You seem to be contradicting yourself at almost every turn here leftcross but I'm glad you see it like that now. It beats your previous posts when you saw it all in a totally different way, and was pointing out that it was exceptionally limited to that strata.

To quote you again

apply only when dealing with certain parts of Thai society.

phones, gold, insects, buffalos are hardly the subjects of conversation among the white skin lotion brigade are they??

Well a lot of posters have already pointed out about the insects. White skinned Thais don't talk about mobile phones or get them as gifts? You gotta be kidding me here man.

Edited July 16, 2006 by bkkmadness

[Charma]

I think BKKmadness has a point. You do appear to have changed your point of view leftcross. But hey, keep at it guys, someone has to fill up the forum!

[meom]

Some of you guys are full of it, come on.

How the hel_l did you ever think about doing all that stuff for a girl?

getting scamed from a taxi etc i can understand, but some of you got 4-6/6?

what the hel_l were you thinking

At the time I thought it a good idea to make her financially independent. Don't know why really but

obviously she didn't disagree

It's a bit like a gamble really and if you win you'll end up with a loyal partner for the rest of your life and if not you loose some money. No big deal really.

[Slated]

It's a bit like a gamble really and if you win you'll end up with a loyal partner for the rest of your life and if not you loose some money. No big deal really.

Well said

[Mossfinn]

You do appear to have changed your point of view leftcross

But then again who cares?

Edited July 16, 2006 by Mossfinn

[Donz]

Leftcross and Bkkmadness, would you two get a room already.

Your both like a married couple

[whynot?]

what did she assault you with ?

what did you do?

What I did was tell her to leave-simple case of jealousy over imaginary infidelitys and I got bored with hearing the accusations everyday-have no reason to lie to you so believe me when i say I never butterflied on her-assault weapons were creative I must say-the usual knife/fingernail/miscellenious household items but then she escalated to bike helmets/pepperspray and my personal favorite-a kamakazi attack by throwing herself down on the street in front of my moving bike as I went to have lunch-girl was so crazy that the police sided with methefarang instead of their own-now that should tell you something huh?

[Donz]

what did she assault you with ?

what did you do?

What I did was tell her to leave-simple case of jealousy over imaginary infidelitys and I got bored with hearing the accusations everyday-have no reason to lie to you so believe me when i say I never butterflied on her-assault weapons were creative I must say-the usual knife/fingernail/miscellenious household items but then she escalated to bike helmets/pepperspray and my personal favorite-a kamakazi attack by throwing herself down on the street in front of my moving bike as I went to have lunch-girl was so crazy that the police sided with methefarang instead of their own-now that should tell you something huh?

You should of put her in line from the start, anyways i guess we will never hear her side of the story either she is a nut or your not telling us the whole truth

[leftcross]

My basic argument is that all levels of society will take gifts of houses, gold , phones and eat insects. I can't see how you can disgree with that?

it is easy to disagree with but i think we have kicked the arse out of this one, eh??

you misinterpret, misquote and take things out of context to try and add weight to your flimsy arguments. i like that kind of attitude.

anyway i have to go now because my wife said the gold chain that was holding the buffalo's mobile phone aorund its neck snapped off while it was reaching for some insects to eat.

i have to wire 3million baht immediatley to ubon nakapeasantville, as well as having my entire salary paid into the family bank account under the name of 'thiswillallbespentonleobeer_butatleastwewonthavetowrkanymore''

toodle pip

[whynot?]

You should of put her in line from the start, anyways i guess we will never hear her side of the story either she is a nut or your not telling us the whole truth

And I would lie to a stranger becuz...? Granted I should have put her in line and I accept responsibilty for creating a monster-no good deed goes unpunished and I am guilty of being too nice to her-and she is certifiably insane-and as a footnote the cops did want 10% of the gross for repoing the gold and bike-seemed reasonable-Is that the going rate?

[Donz]

You should of put her in line from the start, anyways i guess we will never hear her side of the story either she is a nut or your not telling us the whole truth

And I would lie to a stranger becuz...? Granted I should have put her in line and I accept responsibilty for creating a monster-no good deed goes unpunished and I am guilty of being too nice to her-and she is certifiably insane-and as a footnote the cops did want 10% of the gross for repoing the gold and bike-seemed reasonable-Is that the going rate?

I was just hoping to wind you up, thats all.

And people lie to strangers and make things up all the time.

[Heng]

Why do the mistakes have to be bar girl related?

Apparently because that's what the OP believes most folks have mistakes with.

For myself, I was going to add: make sure you buy/choose construction materials yourself for building projects; don't go for the combined materials/labor quote from contractors.

I guess somewhere down the list I should add: don't marry/trust a prostitute with my life savings either.

[eddy-ham]

your GENERALISATIONS could just as easily be used to counter your basic arguments ... ie: some insect eating, gold wearing, nokia 666 dialling farm girl might not be a salt of the earth, cor blimey guvnor cast iron good 'un.

Having read most of the these posts I have to put my two pence worth in.

You are entitled to your opinion so please have mine..Your option of removing yourself from the dregs of society are your options, (to imply that these people, which from the tone of the letters written I think you do) is rather aloft and shows a lack of respect for other peoples position in life.Throughout life you will find good people and bad, it is not a question of class status and by removing yourself from the various areas of society your life will be poorer.............you are where you are by choice, some people do not have that choice.........

[a2396]

Bought 3 mobile phones in the past 4 months for two different ladies. The first had hers "stolen" from her house the first week she had it. I replaced that the next day. This lady is now history (her choice) for various bizare reasons of her own. The second lady wanted a 10,000 bht phone, after which I told her the limit is 4000. Gold for the first one (a modest amount for a ring). The second one hasn't had time to ask yet. No houses, no cars. hel_l will freeze over first. These are NOT bar girls, just ladies wanting a "regular" relationship. You forgot to mention the usual demand for monthly support money. in my experience, if it is not provided, they are bye, bye and on to the next one who has more money.

[jdinasia]

Having friends and acquaintances from all level of society is vital to me. That being said ... other than having a beer with the guys at the motorcycle repair place on occassion. They really aren't friends. Same could be said about the bar employees in lower Suk.

I don't really understand guys that date/marry the people they wouldn't have dated/married back home if given the chance. It is as easy to find someone to date that you can have great conversations with ... and that you can be on more equal footing with.

True that moving here in my late 30's AND learning the language has helped alot. I had rules back in the states too though and i have only broken one dating rule here (because BKK is so different!) Before the date had to have a car ....

Now granted ... the partner did buy a brand new car a year after we got together ...<and paid cash> but in BKK I would never have made owning a vehicle mandatory ... now that I am in Phuket .. it would be again ... but a scooter would be fine

JD's rules of dating ....

1) NEVER date someone here that you wouldn't have back home.

2) Date people you have things in common with

3) Date people with jobs and the history of staying at a job.

4) date people slowly .... don't make a commitment in a day a week or a month

etc ...

all VERY common sense stuff

[Donz]

Well for me my dating rule was. (when i was younger)

1. Make sure she is rich.

2. Good in the sack

3. Good looks.

4. not a bimbo (1 night stands are ok)

But now that im older im glad that I have choosen wisely

[Donz]

Bought 3 mobile phones in the past 4 months for two different ladies. The first had hers "stolen" from her house the first week she had it. I replaced that the next day. This lady is now history (her choice) for various bizare reasons of her own. The second lady wanted a 10,000 bht phone, after which I told her the limit is 4000. Gold for the first one (a modest amount for a ring). The second one hasn't had time to ask yet. No houses, no cars. hel_l will freeze over first. These are NOT bar girls, just ladies wanting a "regular" relationship. You forgot to mention the usual demand for monthly support money. in my experience, if it is not provided, they are bye, bye and on to the next one who has more money.

Actually my future in-laws give us money and ive never had to give her any money.

[tourleadersi]

Better than the rule that some mates back home live by:

1. She has a pulse.

2. She's human

3. She's not a relative.

Edited July 17, 2006 by tourleadersi

[Neeranam]

I don't really understand guys that date/marry the people they wouldn't have dated/married back home if given the chance. It is as easy to find someone to date that you can have great conversations with ... and that you can be on more equal footing with.

I don't really understand guys who date/marry the people they would have back home. I couldn't find any fat-arsed Thai women called Morag in bangkok anyways.

JD's rules of dating ....

1) NEVER date someone here that you wouldn't have back home.

2) Date people you have things in common with

3) Date people with jobs and the history of staying at a job.

4) date people slowly .... don't make a commitment in a day a week or a month

You're an adventurous kind of guy are you?

Edited July 17, 2006 by Neeranam

[Donz]

Better than the rule that some mates back home live by:

1. She has a pulse.

2. She's human

3. She's not a relative.

Or any hole is a goal

[Neeranam]

Bought 3 mobile phones in the past 4 months for two different ladies. The first had hers "stolen" from her house the first week she had it. I replaced that the next day. This lady is now history (her choice) for various bizare reasons of her own. The second lady wanted a 10,000 bht phone, after which I told her the limit is 4000. Gold for the first one (a modest amount for a ring). The second one hasn't had time to ask yet. No houses, no cars. hel_l will freeze over first. These are NOT bar girls, just ladies wanting a "regular" relationship. You forgot to mention the usual demand for monthly support money. in my experience, if it is not provided, they are bye, bye and on to the next one who has more money.

Unbelievable!!!!! - a 'regular' relationship doesn't require the guy to buy the girl some gold or a new bloody phone. You wouldn't be over 50 by any chance, would you, and meet these girls on Sukhumvit Road?

[jdinasia]

I don't really understand guys that date/marry the people they wouldn't have dated/married back home if given the chance. It is as easy to find someone to date that you can have great conversations with ... and that you can be on more equal footing with.

I don't really understand guys who date/marry the people they would have back home. I couldn't find any fat-arsed Thai women called Morag in bangkok anyways.

JD's rules of dating ....

1) NEVER date someone here that you wouldn't have back home.

2) Date people you have things in common with

3) Date people with jobs and the history of staying at a job.

4) date people slowly .... don't make a commitment in a day a week or a month

You're an adventurous kind of guy are you?

Hmmm Yeppers I AM an adventurous guy ... apparently just a tish smarter than some

[LindsayBKK]

ATC was a scam that was going around in Bangkok to do with time shares. They are based in Singapore but move from city to city trying to get people to part with "lifetime" memberships at only about 260,000bht! They hooked lots of Thais but never saw anything about them on TV. Scams happen alot here. Thats what hapeens when you pay people 6000bht a month.

Timeshare scams

Oh My Brother was a sailor in the Australian Navy and his first time to Thailand was to buy my our Mother a few gems to set to rings. He took them home gave to Mother and she found out they were cheap Australian low quality stones. She still has them. I never asked him how much he paid. Best advice to give is never buy something that you don't know what it is worth.

[Neeranam]

QUOTE

JD's rules of dating ....

1) NEVER date someone here that you wouldn't have back home.

2) Date people you have things in common with

3) Date people with jobs and the history of staying at a job.

4) date people slowly .... don't make a commitment in a day a week or a month

You're an adventurous kind of guy are you?

Hmmm Yeppers I AM an adventurous guy ... apparently just a tish smarter than some

Maybe I'm getting confused with what 'date' means. Doesn't it mean to go out with someone, say to the cinema, with the intention of getting laid having a good time or finding out about them?

1) is fair enough

2)isn't that what dating is for?

3)you actually check their employment records? Why, the first thing I wanted my wife to do was QUIT her job.

4)I'd say wait until at you've sampled the culture for at least 2 years. I knew after a few years in Thailand that I wanted to live here and marry a local. I knew after 1 month that my wife was the one. We decided to get engaged after 2 months, married after1 year, and years later have no regrets.

[jdinasia]

see the post with the rules .... date/marry

Yes I get to know someone ..people that can't hold down jobs are not reliable partners in the long run <imho>

and having met guys that met a girl ... (or a guy) and never left their side for a few weeks and then suddenly they are in a relationship without ever having gotten to know the person ... yeah ... go slow!

[Heng]

1) is fair enough

And the one most people overlook. It's not just farangs, all kinds of folks do it, even locals (in these cases, change "back home" to "against all common sense"). Those periodic swan dives aren't always farangs.

Edited July 17, 2006 by Heng

[whynot?]

You should of put her in line from the start, anyways i guess we will never hear her side of the story either she is a nut or your not telling us the whole truth

And I would lie to a stranger becuz...? Granted I should have put her in line and I accept responsibilty for creating a monster-no good deed goes unpunished and I am guilty of being too nice to her-and she is certifiably insane-and as a footnote the cops did want 10% of the gross for repoing the gold and bike-seemed reasonable-Is that the going rate?

I was just hoping to wind you up, thats all.

And people lie to strangers and make things up all the time.

Dude-it takes way more than that to wind me up-next time try insulting my dog

[leftcross]

Having read most of the these posts I have to put my two pence worth in.

You are entitled to your opinion so please have mine..Your option of removing yourself from the dregs of society are your options, (to imply that these people, which from the tone of the letters written I think you do) is rather aloft and shows a lack of respect for other peoples position in life.Throughout life you will find good people and bad, it is not a question of class status and by removing yourself from the various areas of society your life will be poorer.............you are where you are by choice, some people do not have that choice.........

i agree in theory with what you are saying, but it doesnt mean that i will enjoy socialising with uneducated people who live below the poverty line.

yes, i'm sure a lot are good people who with a better start in life could have acheived much more but the fact is there is a GULF between their lives and mine.

it is a natural human trait to want to mix with like-minded individuals, it goes on all around the planet.

perhaps you think i go around sneering and spitting at people who arent in the same position as me??? that is totally incorrect. i treat everybody as i find them. i am respectful, courteous and well-mannered at all times, unless i copme across someone rude.

i think a lot of westerners come to thailand and they are saddened by how poor a lot of the people are while others swan around in their BMWs. we are brought up to believe in people having a fair chance in life through education and opportunity - but that doesnt happen here and there is nothing i can do about it.

every day i interact with working class thais, but i dont find a great deal in common with them if the conversation goes beyond who is the best football player etc etc

it is useless trying to apply western standards out here, thailand is what it is and that's how i deal with the place.