More Wives Turn Violent

[Korat Correct]

The Nation Newspaper reported yesterday "that an increasing number of husbands have become victims of abuse from their wives. Many tolerating the battering for years before they seek help.

Men fear they will be seen as weak and hen pecked and suffer in silence and that when a man is abused there must be something wrong with him."

Stressed and uptight men ( and women) tend to drink alcohol and become aggressive. Men stop talking and women become worried about it.

It recommends that if your women suffers from chemical gloom or if you have an alcohol problem have not reached your 50's to 60's when your testosterone levels decrease and you become less aggressive and more nuturing, help should be sort.

Reference "Why men don't listen and Women can't read Maps" by A & B Pease.

Are these Issan problems too and where can one go for help?

Edited July 18, 2006 by Korat Correct

[diddlysquat]

The Nation Newspaper reported yesterday "that an increasing number of husbands have become victims of abuse from their wives. Many tolerating the battering for years before they seek help.

Men fear they will be seen as weak"

where can one go for help?

Korat Correct. Do you see yourself as weak?

[steven w]

Korat correct has merely brought this subject up for discussion within the forum.

HE doesnt say he agrees with it, or says anything about it, I hope other members can understand the meaning of a 'forum.'

regards Mr korat Correct.

[bannork]

Moderators, please throw these kite flyers back where they belong, namely on the general or farang affairs forum; this topic has nothing specific to do with Issan and is a waste of valuable cyberspace.

[Thaipwriter]

It recommends that if your women suffers from chemical gloom

I'm not sure of the exact medical description being referred to here but I would think that any woman would become a sufferer after spending a little time with either "Korat Correct" or the much maligned "Steven W"

Edited July 18, 2006 by Thaipwriter

[diddlysquat]

Moderators, please throw these kite flyers back where they belong, namely on the general or farang affairs forum; this topic has nothing specific to do with Issan and is a waste of valuable cyberspace.

Whats your problem, son?

Its a daft thread wherever it is posted. Best posted here where few people will notice it.

[bannork]

Moderators, please throw these kite flyers back where they belong, namely on the general or farang affairs forum; this topic has nothing specific to do with Issan and is a waste of valuable cyberspace.

Whats your problem, son?

Its a daft thread wherever it is posted. Best posted here where few people will notice it.

No problem dad, but the Issan forum is not a dumping ground for farangs lost in cyberspace.

[GuestHouse]

Anyone who doubts the prevelance of women committing domestic violence need only talk to my sister. She's a doctor in a NY hospital and sees numerous cases of male victims of domestic violence - almost entirely they deny they have been victims of violence and will offer other explanaitions for their injuries.

The problem, as she explains, is not just the injuries presented, but often there are other victims too, a woman who is attacking her husband, is a risk to any children in the home.

Meanwhile, Leicester University in the UK did a study on domestic violence in the run up to proposed changes in the UK laws relating to domestic violence - The proposed changes where to include the police registration of men who beat their wives and girlfriends (Note the gender bias, and yes that was the proposal, a gender biased register).

Leicester University's study was to investigate violence in immigrant (asia) families, but to avoid accusations of being biased the study looked at all domestic violence with the intention of filtering for violence in Asian families (the belief being that for cultural reasons this was being undereported).

What the study demonstrated was that when ALL domestic violence was examined, women were as violent as men - All domestic violence being that against children, spouses, partners, aged parents etc.

Women's groups rounded on the reports findings claiming much of the violence by women against children and aged parents was a result of the lack of support - Read excuse the violence.

The proposed changes to the law were revised and the register idea abandoned (although still held as an objective by women's groups).

Meanwhile the UK government spend £60Million a year in direct aid to groups supporting victims of domestic violence - £0.00 of which goes to any group specifically helping men.

[Chang_paarp]

In all fairness to the Brittish government they have 1 (one) domestic violence shelter for men. This was brought about by the activism of a number of mens groups. This is 1 more than is available in most countries.

When honest data is collected on domestic violence (peer reviewed not advocate sponsored) it is found that domestic violence is not a gender based behaviour. It is usually a symptom of other psychological problems.

The wimmens groups who say it is a male condition ignore the data of domestic violence in same sex relationships of either gender. There is a large body of data that shows the rates of DV are connsistant throughout the gay and hetrosexual population. If you want to see some of the supporting data PM me and I will refer you to some places that have published it. The only trouble with publishing this sort of data is that the PC crowd attack the reports with zeal as it rattles their belief system.

[meemiathai]

I am looking forward to see Kat's opinion.

For me I believe it is logical that women need more help than men do from domestic violence.

It is no rocket science that women are no match for men when it comes to strength. That means it mostly is not likely that a woman can seriously injure a man if he does try to protect himself. But for men, a simple punch is going to seriously harm a woman (both physically and psychologically)and there is little a woman can do at the scene to protect herself.

You are not thinking that men are being unfairly treated, are you? GH?

Edited July 19, 2006 by meemiathai

[Sing_Sling]

There seems to be a thread at the moment about women assaulting men - the local rag Straits Times - had a report on that as well this week after a man killed his wife after taking beatings for years, losing his hearing in one ear, and watching their kids get thrashed as well.

Meemiathai, I am not sure why you are turning this into a male-female competition for sympathy, but there are many shelters for abused women, societies etc . . . and so there should be as it is beyond doubt that women are by far the more abused category.

This does not exclude the fact that men are often the victims of abuse by their females partners, and it is by no means just slapping or verbal abuse.

I would suggest that seeking guidance and assistance would be bebtter than being the alpha male and beating the crap out of a female . . .

[sbk]

Violence and abuse directed at another human being (or animal) is appalling. It doesn't matter who is doing the abuse, male or female, it is a terrible thing to do.

[suiging]

My father-in-law was thrown on the street by his wife, where he died in a home for mendicants in HK. I have noticed over the years that ladies have long memories and abusive husbands, strong in their youth are often surpassed in both physical and mental toughness by their wives in their dotage. Moral of the story........be kind at all times to your charming Asian wife, or wake one day to find the boot is on the other foot and suffer for it.

[Sing_Sling]

To read up on the topic of spousal abuse:

http://www.todayonline.com/articles/131439.asp

[meemiathai]

Sing Sling, don't get me wrong.

Not at all trying to turn this into a male-female competition for sympathy. I'm not that childish, I hope so.

Anyone who needs help should be taken care of.

[meemiathai]

I have noticed over the years that ladies have long memories and abusive husbands, strong in their youth are often surpassed in both physical and mental toughness by their wives in their dotage.

Exactly my observation. But it's understandable, isn't it? After being bullied for years. Who can blame them?

Anyway, it is sad to see relationships like that, isn't it? Me and my wife love each other to death, so... hope it's going to last forever.

[Sing_Sling]

Sing Sling, don't get me wrong.

Not at all trying to turn this into a male-female competition for sympathy. I'm not that childish, I hope so.

Anyone who needs help should be taken care of.

My apologies for suggesting that.

On your last post you mentjoned that it is sad that marriages turn out this way . . . indeed it is, I'm sure many of them are started for the wrong reasons and those reasons are not strong enough to endure times of trouble or hardship . . . Mutual respect goes further than a great romp in the sack.

[GuestHouse]

You are not thinking that men are being unfairly treated, are you? GH?

No, I'm not thinking that men are being unfairly treated - I am thinking that the domestic violence issue has been hijacked and is now at the point where it is seen almost entirely as a male perpertrator/female victim issue.

It's an issue of perception and the impact that perception has had on funding, research, and social provision.

[Scott]

I had an uncle who was the victim of spousal abuse. His wife could be unbelievably vicious and when she was done with him, he was black, blue, bruised and I would guess at one point or another probably suffered broken bones.

She died when she was rather young and he remarried and has lived a happy and non-violent life with his second wife for the past 30+ years.